3 Strengths of Introverts vs. Extroverts

[Music] watch this full series at the links in the description below and subscribe to our YouTube channel to watch new mental health videos every week you've definitely been asked this question are you an introvert or are you an extrovert leave a comment below let us know what you are and if you like the classification of being an introvert or being an extrovert I am an introvert and I am here with dr. Romani who is also an introvert yes yeah and we actually pulled everybody that was here on set and there's 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 all right no I know 8 8 about an 8 of us yeah no I think most people think if you had to choose extrovert would be the one to choose they're better there that's like the desirable one more popular yeah but is that true is it more desirable to be an extrovert or actually looks better than introverts well I certainly hope not mr. just to protect my own ego I think that introverts have gotten a really really bad brand and a bad label and I think a lot of that societally driven a graduate student of mine Irene Hernandez who works very closely with me on a variety of projects she she's the one who sort of awoken me to the power of introversion in a really eloquent way and has really talked to me in her thesis is really on the strength of introversion so reading the literature review that she did as a projects amazing and it was and then it pushed me to say yes this is exactly right so it's amazing how much society has made it seem like if you're not the life of the party then you're then I'm not inviting you to my party yeah I think yeah and yet there's so many strengths and gifts that introverts bring to the table and we don't I don't think we as a society understand what they are and and I think that they really bear for their attention because I'm guessing actually a lot of our med circle viewers are introverts and know exactly what we're talking about yeah let us know if you are I'd be fascinated to read your comments in here about your experiences as an introvert and Irene is here with us today so shout out to Irene who's provided a lot and all the dog care I just waited everywhere but who has given us a lot of insight into this and there was a moment in the series that you really credited to Irene this great line that kind of summed up yeah introversion and how it relates to anxiety and I want to share that with our viewers right now so take a look at this part of our of our series now how does an introvert compare to someone with social anxiety okay so Irene told me something brilliant she this is how many K someone skipped our first oh yes I will so my graduate student and assistant and introvert expert extraordinaire Irene Hernandez taught me this beautiful way of remembering and I want to give her credit cuz it is really it's lovely it's introversion is your way social anxiety is in your way introversion is your way is your way yeah social anxiety is in your way okay so introversion is simply who you are a person with introversion may not necessarily be socially anxious social anxiety is characterized by almost a fear of being criticized ridiculed or looking foolish in a social situation and it's a real concern as being scrutinized now that's not to say your average bear who's an introvert wants to get up and talk in front of a thousand people that's in fact where you and I who are both introverts maybe a little bit of an anomaly but the fact is though that they are not if they go and they're with a group of people they're not sitting there the whole time wondering do people dislike me now is it possible for an introvert to be socially anxious absolutely it's not synonymous though and I think a mistake that people make is that she's introverted so she's afraid of people that's not true at all she's introverted because she's introverted how does anxiety differ or does it differ in somebody who's an introvert as opposed to an extrovert anxieties anxiety I mean it it's a phenomenon characterized by apprehension and avoidance and physiological arousal like a heart racing heart and can't catch your breath and you feel dizzy intense nothing xiety now it introverts may be more prone to anxiety because they tend to be higher in a trait called neuroticism so yeah you might see more anxiety in them but once the anxiety is presenting it may be that people were introverted may go to different sources and different kinds of solutions for it if the experience is going to be symbolized for introverts and extroverts yeah but introverts do come with a lot of strengths that are unique to them in the research and the thesis what have the Fang found findings found lots of interesting findings first of all introverts can actually make really great workers on teams especially when you need someone is just sort of dial down and get the work done and you know people like hi they get bored sitting in the room they make wonderful students they really do because being a students a very introverted process you sit you study you read they make wonderful writers artists creatives where you really do need to be sort of in a space by yourself for a while and work so in that way I think a lot of every time you pick up a book you probably need to thank an introvert that you know because they wrote they wrote it they were the ones who were willing to sort of lock into a room I'm laughing because when I first met the producer on that circle Bridget I told her my favorite thing to do is she's an introvert too and my furry thing to do is to sit and she goes I'm gonna take it one step further and say that my favorite thing to do is settle in yes and I go oh you're so right like just settle in with a book or a TV show and just like have that now I go that is such an introvert yeah it's so great so if you if you like settling let's make settling in a thing it needs to be a thing okay so what other strengths the introverts have the other thing we don't think about is that there are actually wonderful leaders we often think of the leader is the grandiose extroverted person but actually introverts are leaders that are often very tuned in to the people who work with them they actually listen to their constituency to their stakeholders and they can they can lead from a place of knowing who they're leading because it doesn't have to be all brass bands like they're its so we always assume are they're an introvert they don't want to lead they can be actually very very good leader so we underestimate them in that space introverts are also wonderful friends you know that if whether it's as your sibling or your friend they they tend to be again very their social networks tend to be a lot smaller but they also be care they're also tend to be characterized by more depth and the conversations go deeper the connection goes deeper listen it's a numbers game extroverts have more people in their social network you know I mean you can only give so much to each of those those folks but for the introverts relationships do matter this whole idea that introverts don't care about other people that's an absolute that's it in accuracy they do care about people and they give that there a lot to those people they're wonderful listeners you know because they don't need the constant that as much attention from other people in the same way they'll actually listen and they'll listen with a really a really compassionate attuned ear more than anything that they're they're listening they actually want to listen to you and they don't feel this need that now know me me me the attention needs to be on me there's an interesting little wrinkle on introverts that I think bears mentioning which is they have what we call low reward sensitivity and when you have low reward sensitivity what that means is you don't need lots of rewarding things happening in your life meaning you don't need to be like in Vegas which slot machines and excitement and you don't need the excitement that comes from exciting food or drugs and out you know all all those things that we need rewards like some people it's almost like they can't even be bothered if there's not lots of excitement and bells and whistles that's a sort of almost a sensitivity some people have like if it's not rewarding you can't even get them to engage it's almost like the gamification of everything introverts don't need that they actually are less sensitive to that so they're they're operating in a very different level and in that way as a if you're a capitalist you're not gonna like introverts ISM because they don't go for the bells and whistles as much to be frank with you so there's there's again a more quiet kind of issue you know there's a quieter kind of a picture that emerges there because they don't need all that reward you know excitement excitement well you gave me such a phenomenal take away aha moment from this class because I am an introvert who has diagnosed depression since age of nine and while I prefer to stay home it's not always because I'm depressed and rather it's it's that's the rarity being of the reason and I want to share that moment from inside the class so take a look at this so you're both socially isolate in the name of the depression yes but when you're not depressed you won't socially isolate will have the same level of social engagement as you did before that is such a big moment for me and anybody else who's an introvert with depression I would imagine because I can recognize the difference between social isolation isolation and just preferring to spend the night but yeah so that's right there's a huge feeling yeah that the different that's right and so if I'm noticing myself on the social isolation point I think there would be a part of me before this moment that would have said well no that's just because you're an introvert yep and you're you're ignoring the red flag what that is no your depression that's right that's right hey it's a big one that was my big takeaway and I love that just knowing that yeah is going to change the way I live and enjoy the time I have with myself what will people get from this series I think that there's a lot they get from this series because more than anything there's a lot of mythology and very inaccurate mezcla haulage eat around introverts we tend to we tend to view introverts of somehow lacking in fact when you look at a lot of the literature in psychology its introversion is like the absence of extraversion is a extraversion is the thing you want in introversion means you don't of it rather than they're both you know equal poles on a continuum that they're extroverts that they're introverts and you found that ego you know this idea we uses ego-syntonic Santana this is consistent with who you are like you're good with this this is who you are the problem is the world makes it hard to be good with it because everyone's like come on join us funtime group time and can interpret it from time to time will they go and participate in something like that enjoy absolutely they'll come to a party will there be the one dancing on the table probably not do you want dancing do you feel in your house but it's the it but they'll enjoy and they may but they may the person be the person at the party who Khamsin is able to have a really cool intense conversation with you off to the side a little bit maybe one of the most memorable things that happens to you at that party so this idea of the introvert as a hermit as somebody who's who was abnormally shy who's aloof who's socially uncomfortable it's not that it's a preference and and I have to say that you know thank goodness we've got him this is you know this is where like I said if I were not an introvert I couldn't write books because I'd be like after two hours and where's the people but yeah I wouldn't get the work done so it's been a blessing in my career but I have to say there was that period of time and I think when people are young they feel like oh I think I'm supposed to be out in the world more so you know I think that that idea of that they that we have to be very careful and how we think about personality traits and realize that society valve value some patterns and we need to make sure we don't get into that sort of pylon of thinking like oh well introverts have must if they're not they're as good as extroverts I mean extroverts already have the best billboards on the freeway so it's really time that the introverts get that kind of understanding and like I said when I looked at the kind of data that my student was getting in earthy psious I was shocked at how prevalent introversion was in her sample of college students so I think it's just sort of it's there's more folks out there that are introverted then we often think because the extra are the ones who are out there the extrovert elements of social media they're the they run media they run the airwaves they're what's on reality TV so that's who we see the introverts are the ones who aren't always commanding attention not anymore not anymore like we got cameras all around on to introverts change it up but this class okay yeah but I think it's so important for our med circle viewers to really see that it's in to get away from this idea that introversion is anything but just a hell another thing person that's all it is is that you have brown eyes this person has blue eyes okay this class though is not just for introverts if you are an extrovert and want to learn more about the mind of an introvert if you want to learn more about depression and anxiety in general this class is for you we go through the depression and anxiety factors on what it takes to get that diagnosis what the symptoms and behaviors look like how you can prevent oh my gosh we didn't even go through and do the over that the prevention of depression and anxiety in the class is phenomenal wonderful wonderful wonderful and of course we go through treatment as well it was phenomenal well I appreciate you tell me that's with you it was really enjoyed but again you could also remember it's also a reminder that stress management is actually a big part of all mental health care and mental health prevention and so that that's one of the big tools and takeaways and whether you're an introvert or you're an extrovert you may cope with stress differently and stress may mean different things but the fact of the matter is it's such an important thing for us to focus on as individuals and families workplaces communities in the world at large absolutely so parents adults anybody who wants to learn more about depression and anxiety and especially those of us who are introverted this class is for you you can learn more about the class at bed circle calm dr. Romani thank you thank you Kyle Kyle Kittleson and remember whatever you're going through you got this thanks for watching check out the links below for more information on how to access this full series and subscribe to our YouTube channel to watch mental health videos every week did you like what you heard in this video if you want to ask a med circle doctor a question directly you can learn how by visiting the links in the description below [Music] you

Channel: MedCircle

Views: 453,518

Keywords: introvert, introvert vs extrovert, extrovert, introversion, introvert problems, being an introvert, introverted, introverts, psych2go, introvert personality, shy, what is an introvert, psychology, introvert extrovert, personality traits, personality type, quiet, ambivert, personality types, introverts vs extroverts, the power of introverts, facts, list, people, personality, extrovert vs introvert, solitude, relationships, relationship, loner, conversation, social, medcircle, kyle kittleson, dr. ramani

Id: sZkaHnpfw8g

Length: 15min 22sec (922 seconds)

Published: Sat Nov 30 2019