(bright tones) - [Jake] Video games,
unfortunately, are always plagued with moments of silly dialogue. You know, just weird, goofy, awkward, or cringeworthy lines
that some characters say that you just can't quite
get out of your head. That's what we're talking about today. We got 20 stupid examples
of really funny dialogue in video games. First over at number 20, let's start off with the
obvious Resident Evil 4. Now, Resident Evil 4 knows what it is. It's campy on purpose. It loves to be goofy and
have a bunch of wacky fun and say a bunch of dumb stuff, but the Resident Evil 4
remake loses some of that. It's definitely got some good one-liners and some zingers and it
adds some of its own, but the original really had a lot and it's really hard to
decide what moment of dialogue is the absolute silliest,
but it's gotta be a lot of the exchanges
between Salazar and Leon. Now, the remake, unfortunately, took away the whole Codec radio
system where the bad guy would actually call you up to talk smack. That doesn't happen anymore, and unfortunately, it's
missing so many great moments. Leon and Salazar in the
original game have so many back and forths about how Salazar
is putting on this grand play and how everything is
going according to plan, and there's all these dumb
tongue in cheek references to plays and stories and
scripts and, you know, other than, "No thanks, bro," I think one of the greatest things Leon
says to Salazar is, and I quote, "I don't ever remember being
a part of your crappy script." - You're nothing but
an extra in my script, so don't get too carried away. Your biggest scene is over. - I don't ever remember being
a part of your crappy script. - Well then, why don't you show me what a first-class script is
like through your own actions? - [Jake] It's just truly puzzling. It's so weird, it's like
he was trying to be witty but it just doesn't
fit right and as great, incredible as the voice actor is, this one just doesn't land, but it's another in a long
line of Resident Evil lines that you can't help but just love. Next over at number 19, let's
talk about Mortal Kombat 4. Mortal Kombat 4 was incredibly
significant for the time. It was, like, technically the
last main line Mortal Kombat game to get an arcade
release, and it was also the first Mortal Kombat game
to go fully 3D graphics, and it is very much a product of its time. I mean, it was 1997. Fighting games were
pretty humble back then. You probably have
experience with one of them, but I don't know if
you've ever experienced the Mortal Kombat 4 character endings. These cut scenes are
absolutely out of this world. Every single one, showdowns
between characters, they say the dumbest
things I've ever heard. It is so corny, so over
the top, so ridiculous. They honestly have to
be seen to be believed. It's often memed, but you
may have seen this encounter, this final encounter between
Sonya Blade and Jarek, and then also Jax, it's so ridiculous. Like, she throws him off a
cliff, he double crosses her, pulls her off the cliff, then Jax shows up out of nowhere to grab him and throw him off the cliff and he says... - Too late, Jarek. - You can't drop me. You have to uphold the
law, you have to arrest me. Wait, wait, this is brutality. You can't do it. - Wrong, Jarek, this is not a
brutality, this is a fatality. (Jarek screaming) - [Jake] This whole ending is amazing. All the endings are absolutely amazing. Every bit of the 3D characters on screen just doing their thing and having story and dialogue is absolutely ridiculous, but this part is just downright legendary. I wanna show more, we don't have time, so I highly recommend
looking them up on YouTube. We'll link one down in the description. Next, over at number 18,
we have Metroid: Other M, which is like the black
sheep of the Metroid family. It's completely different. It's a totally different style of game, and it takes some big jumps
in how it portrays Samus, and really everything in the Metroid lore. I mean, like right, in what
is basically the early game, like, intro thing,
Samus' mission is set up, she's in her ship when
she gets a distress signal and we'll just let this one play out. - [Samus] Code name Baby's Cry. (electronics beeping) A common SOS with the
urgency of a baby crying. The nickname comes from the fact that the purpose of the
signal is to draw attention. - [Jake] Yeah, absolutely genius. The fact that she
doubles down in saying... - [Samus] Baby's Cry. (ship flying) It was as though it was
crying specifically for me. (dramatic music) - [Jake] And then there's
the place in the game called the Bottle Ship. Really, the game does a lot of things with the theme of motherhood, but regardless of how you
feel how successful that is, a lot of the super on the nose dialogue is absolutely grating to hear. I think there's a reason why in most traditional Metroid games, there's not a lot of dialogue. Sometimes less is more, and I think Metroid: Other M proved that. Next over at number 17, the main character in Atomic
Heart says crispy critters. That's, like, his catchphrase. I don't know what this is. I don't know what they
were trying to do here. Like, instead of like holy
crap or something like that, he'll say crispy critters. It is not a reference to
the cereal in the 1960s because the the timeline actually, technically, doesn't line up. Somebody actually looked that up. I think what they were trying to do here was just create some weird catchphrase that somebody in the future would say, just something that you
just don't understand. It's in their vernacular,
it's in their dialect, you know, it's part of their culture. It's not something that you'd understand. Us as Americans or people
who live in other countries all have their own random
weird things that they say that they don't know where
they really came from, but it's just a form of expression. But crispy critters just
sounds really weird. I'm sorry. I think it was a good
idea with good intentions, but it's cringe. (piano music) - [P-3] Crispy critters, man. - [Jake] There is technically
an explanation for it towards the end of the game, like it was actually something imprinted on the player's subconscious. It was a phrase that they heard when they were in the hospital and that was describing a
burn victim, a crispy critter. It doesn't make the phrase
any less weird in my opinion, and the explanation is absolutely bizarre. Atomic Heart is actually just straight up bizarre altogether. I actually didn't hate the
game despite some problems, but the crispy critter thing is weird, we will be the first to admit that. Next, over at number 16,
the original Resident Evil is absolutely a classic
for awkward voice acting and strangely written dialogue, and of course the one
that really takes the cake is the Jill sandwich bit. Now, as someone who has
grown up playing the series and started with the first
one, I knew even back then as a young boy that this line
was just absolutely silly and weird. So Jill gets stuck in a trap
with the ceiling slowly closing down on her, and she is
saved in the nick of time, and the legendary bearded
Barry Burton is there to console her afterwards, and that's when he utters
the legendary phrase... - That was too close, you
were almost a Jill Sandwich. - You're right. Barry, thanks for saving my life. - [Jake] Absolutely genius stuff. I mean, between this,
the master of unlocking, the original Resident Evil
really takes the cake. That being said, a Jill sandwich is, like, a hallmark for Resident Evil fans. We love it as much as we cringe. Next over at number 15,
Final Fantasy X, the laugh. You know we were gonna mention the laugh. The way the laugh goes down
just is so awkward and strange, but I'm gonna kind of defend this one because the story context around it actually gives this weird,
awkward, forced laugh a little bit more meaning. Granted, I may be reading
into this too much because I just love the
Final Fantasy games, and I really love X. I actually think it
was like a story swing, a dialogue swing, a moment
that just didn't quite land. Maybe it was because of the delivery, maybe it was the setup, I don't know, but it is kind of funny, like
especially just on its own. (awkward laughter) - You probably shouldn't laugh any more. - [Jake] That laugh is rough, man. Next, over at number 14, we
have the more recent Forspoken. Now, Forspoken has a
lot of rough dialogue, some really dumb, silly stuff
that the characters utter near constantly with the game kind of having a very, very distinct feel. I'll say that to be charitable. It's kind of got like a, "How
do you do, fellow teens?" type of vibe to some of the writing, with the main character
in particular always, constantly trying to sound
quick witty, and with it, and snarky, and it gets a
bit annoying after a while. - Did you not just see me
take out that gnarly beast? - [Jake] This is just really,
like, the tip of the iceberg. There are so many lines
throughout this game. Really, it mostly comes
from the main character. - Did I just do that? - [Frey] Well, definitely
with my assistance. - I did not just do that. - [Frey] We did. - I just moved with my mind. - [Frey] Perhaps our
connection has somehow awoken some abilities. - I just moved shit with my mind. - [Frey] I just keep hearing I, I, I. - I just moved shit with my freaking mind! Yeah, okay. That is something I do now. I do magic, talk to sentient
cuffs, kill jacked up beasts. You know what, I'll probably fly next. - [Frey] Now you're just being ridiculous. - [Jake] But there's a
couple things here and there in the writing from some
other side characters. We did a Before You Buy for Forspoken. We weren't the biggest fans of it. It has found some fans out there, but ultimately part of the reason why we didn't like the
game is just how awkward some of this stuff is. Next over at number 13,
we have Kingdom Hearts II. There is a moment when
Mickey Mouse makes his debut wearing that sweet new garb
all blacked out, you know, with the drip as the kids say, and he introduces himself with this line. - Say, fellas, did somebody
mention the Door to Darkness? (dramatic music) - [Jake] There is something
so funny about this, like I don't know if it's just the whole Kingdom Hearts thing, which can sometimes be jarring, or the fact that Mickey is
just awkwardly standing there as he says it, to the fact that they got
the Mickey Mouse voice actor to say something like
this to the fact that, I just want to quote a
YouTube comment that says, "Imagine Walt Disney watching
and reacting to this today." I still can't believe, like,
Disney even let Mickey Mouse dress like this and be
involved in a game like this. I mean, it ultimately resulted
in some really cool stuff from Kingdom Hearts, but it
is crazy to see in motion. Next over at number 12, we
have the original Shenmue. Now, a lot of side characters,
NPCs said a lot of weird, strange things to the
main character sometimes, just kind of shouting for no reason. The voice acting in this
game was pretty wild, but the writing is on another level, I think ultimately just
because of translation issues. Like this line... - Years ago I was Chinese. Now I'm a naturalized Japanese. In China, my name was Su Jian Ren. - Is that so? - [Jake] This poor old man announces that years ago he was Chinese. There's actually definitely
a lot more to that dialogue if you look into it. According to some fan translations online, it actually amounted to
the character describing that years ago, he
originally hailed from China, but became a naturalized
Japanese official citizen. So pretty simple explanation,
but the English translation is just really straightforward
and awkward and goofy. And you know what? If you ask me, that's
part of Shenmue's charm. Next over at number 11, a long time ago, in a galaxy far away, the
original Destiny released and it was like a totally different game from what Destiny 2 is now
to the point where the ghost was a pivotal part of the story and it was voiced by none
other than Peter Dinklage, famous actor who you may
know from Game of Thrones as Tyrion Lannister. And let's just say, I don't
know if he was trying to sound like an artificial
intelligence or something, but it just kind of sounded
like he was half-assing it. No disrespect to him, but yeah. Along with that I think
he was also dealing with some pretty rough material, specifically, of course, the famous line, say it with me now... - [Ghost] That wizard came from the moon. - [Jake] Yup, there's that. I mean, it makes sense. The moon is part of the plot. Wizards are a part of the
game as enemies and, yeah, I mean, like, they had to say it, I guess. Like, there was a reason to say it, but the way he said it and just
the whole awkwardness of it just makes it legendary if you ask us. It was so goofy, even
more goofy in the context with all the other lines around it, that they did eventually
remove it from the game, but then they put it back in, because it was like a viral moment. Destiny fans and the game
really have come a long way. Just looking back at this one, it sounds and feels like a fever dream. Next over at number 10,
let's talk Mega Man 8 and some of the incredible stuff that comes from Dr. Light. Like, all of it is just
unintentionally hilarious because of the voice actor. It's not even really necessarily
the dialogue written here, it's who they chose to deliver it. Essentially, he kind of
just sounds like my uncle, like some guy they found
in the back of a deli and they said, "Here, you're a scientist in a science fiction video
game, read these lines." A lot of it is really funny and goofy. He has, like, marbles in his mouth. He just sounds like a real regular dude. - A strange meteor has fallen
to earth just a while ago. This meteor seems to be emitting a powerful energy signature. Something this powerful must
not fall into hands of evil. - [Jake] Maybe that's
what they were going for, I don't know, but there are certain lines where you can actually kind
of hear him kind of flub it, specifically during some exposition. There's this scene, like you
hear him there when he says, like, "You must uncover
all the energy immediately, Mega Man." - You must recover all the
energy immediately, Mega Man. - [Jake] It's too good. It's so funny. I don't know why it makes me crack up. Anyway, moving on. - When we find that meteor,
we'll find Dr. Wily. - [Jake] Next over at number
nine, in Final Fantasy IV, there's, "You spoony bard." This is like a legendary quote by now. "You spoony bard" is what a character says to a bard in the game, and a
lot of people chalk this up as just some weird awkward localization or translation issues,
but according to those that did the research,
it's not a translation, it's just a made up line, a made up word that wasn't actually in
the original main game. Like, the Japanese text
didn't mention anything about a spoony bard, so it
was just kind of thrown in. Now, according to
legendsoflocalization.com and some interviews and
research they did, essentially, and I quote, "The script was translated by a Japanese speaker
who lacked the ability to write in fluent English. But there are also small chunks of text throughout the script
that were clearly revised and edited to sound better." So some things like spoony
bard fell through the cracks and it's really funny, and to this day, some old school Final Fantasy fans will still throw this one out. (8-bit music) This is up there with the
hallmarks of, "I feel asleep" and, "All your base are belong to us," but it's the one that
doesn't get enough love, so we wanted to mention it today. It's just, it's funny. Next over at number eight, Castlevania: Symphony of
the Night's legendary, "What is a man?" speech. If you ask me, I think
this whole encounter, this line in particular, the
whole thing, absolute banger. So Symphony of the Night kicks off with a really awesome intro with Richter Belmont rushing
in to face off against Dracula. Richter talks some smack
and how he has to die because he's a beast, he's
a vampire, all that stuff, while Dracula kind of just
goes on to get a little poetic, get a little existential, with
him wrapping it up with... - [Dracula] What is a man? A miserable little pile of secrets but enough talk. Have at you! - [Jake] And then essentially
kicking off the boss battle. You know, some people think
this is cheesy or silly or maybe even Dracula
sounding a little pretentious. I think it's badass. Next over at number
seven, Death Stranding. Now, Hideo Kojima, his
writing, his dialogue always has some awkward
or weird or goofy moments, most of them pretty intentional
if I'm being honest, and the one that really stuck
with people in Death Stranding that we wanna point out
today, among many others, is this one... - [Amelie] We run, together. - Run? - Yeah. Like Mario and Princess Beach. - [Jake] Now it's crazy out of context. It makes just as much sense in context. It's kind of messy because
the end of the game dumps a lot on you for the
last, like, hour or so, and the fact that, like,
the beach is an actual thing in the game and the reference
is just a tongue in cheek Hideo Kojima video game reference. He's done it before, but even for Kojima, this is, like, a hell
of a belabored pun, man. This one's pushing it. That's as far as we're gonna go. I'm not really gonna explain
the concept of the beach or anything because we're
gonna be here all day if I do. Now at number six, Warhammer
40K: Dawn of War SoulStorm. This line about the metal boxes. - [Carron] Look, rhinos! Rhinos! Our enemies hide in metal
boxes, the cowards, the fools! We... We should take away their metal boxes. - [Jake] Obviously I can't
replicate how that was said, but oh boy, this one's a lot. Sounds like the character or the voice actor was really
riffing a lot on this one, and maybe it was the first take. This is a really cheesy
line even for Warhammer, which has some cool stuff. This game is the final
expansion to Dawn of War, which is often considered the black sheep of the game series. It wasn't made by the original developers and that shows with this goofy dialogue, and also the game had a lot of bugs. Next, over at number five for
the Turbo Graphic CD in 1990, there was a game called Last Alert. It was very much just kind
of like a straightforward, kind of top-down-ish run and gun shooter, and it was very much
a product of the '90s, from the way the game
was to just the dialogue, story, and presentation. Just look at this exchange right here. - Guy Kazama, if you don't
want the hostage killed, you should keep quiet. - Guy, the stealth bomber is
in the back of this factory. - Okay, Spartan, hang in
there just a while longer. (intense music) - [Jake] I don't know what
it is, just the delivery, the two characters, the voice choice. To me, it just sounds like
two guys who were high as hell riffing in a room, and you know what? I respect them for that. This sounds fun and goofy. Honestly, unpopular and
weird, unhinged opinion, but I think more games and voice actors should sound like this today. Now, next, over at number four, let's talk the original Devil May Cry. The original Devil May Cry
is a pretty different game. In the early days, they were
still trying to figure out what Devil May Cry really was. At some points in this game,
it was super over the top and campy and awesome,
just good Capcom style. Other times it was trying to
take itself super seriously and it was gothic and spooky and somber, and it meant for a lot of weird, kind of all over the
place dialogue moments. There are many worth
pointing out, but, of course, the big one is this... - I should have saved you. (somber music) I should have been the
one to fill your dark soul with light! (echoing) - [Jake] I actually
think it's a good line, maybe if you read it
in a book or something, but just the way it was delivered, the way it was presented, the
echoing of the word, "Light." - Light! (echoing) - [Jake] It's just rough. I mean, honestly, the
whole ending is amazing. I still, to this day,
really have a soft spot in my heart for the
original Devil May Cry. It is such a cool thing and
no cool game is complete without just some weird
dialogue moments like this. Next, over at number three,
The House of the Dead 2. The main character gets a
Goldman, one of the bad guys behind the desk who explains
his whole evil plan. And here, just listen to this. - I've been waiting for you, friends. - Goldman, do you know what you're doing? - I'm fully aware of what I'm doing. Can't you see? Man committed a sin, disturbing
the lifecycle of nature, the original sin that
man is responsible to, to protect the lifecycle. I have made a creature
to rule over mankind. This is the final battle. Show yourself, our new ruler, the Emperor! (mechanical whirring) - I am. I am. I am the one who rules over nature. I shall destroy and hate mankind. I am the Emperor! - [Jake] Maybe back in the day, it was me playing it in the arcade and maybe it was just the second one not being my favorite game, but I barely remember stuff like this. It's almost like hearing it in full undisturbed quality
on a computer screen, it just sounds insane. I don't know if it's someone
just completely reading or somebody who speaks English
as, like, a second language. There is something so jarring
and silly about the delivery. To me it actually almost just sounds like it's, like, artificial intelligence. I know they didn't have
capabilities of that back then, but this sounds like Microsoft
Sam delivering evil dialogue about the original sin and protecting the lifecycle and stuff. It is wild. These games were absolutely
batshit insane for the time, and if you wanna look
into more, you should, 'cause this one is only
just scratching the surface. Next over at number two,
Sonic Riders on Game Cube. You've probably heard this line before. - Not just a race, but a special race to
see who's the fastest. - [Jake] Dude, I mean,
guys, like, it's Sonic. It's all about going fast. We get that, we get emphasizing that, but we know what a race also is. A race is to determine who is the fastest because the fastest person wins. Why would you say it's
twice, I'm going crazy. Are we almost at the end of this video because I'm losing my mind. Next down at number one, there's a point in EARTH DEFENSE FORCE 5 where the aliens are revealed
and they're humanoid aliens. These games are campy,
they're over the top. You know, they're beloved because they are so zany
and just silly sci-fi, but there's a point in the
game where all the characters on the radio chatter just
constantly going back and forth describing how they've seen bipedal aliens that look like humans. - [Radio] I'm not talking about monsters. I'm talking about humanoid aliens! - [Jake] The characters go back and forth, over-emphasizing and over-delivering. It's just, like, over expository dialogue describing how these new creatures, these new aliens from
UFOs look like humans. - [Radio] I'm talking
about humanoid aliens! - [Radio 2] We have a reported
sighting of humanoid aliens. - [Radio 3] Humanoid aliens? - [Radio 2] Extraterrestrial
beings similar to humans. - [Radio 3] You mean aliens
that look like humans? - [Radio 2] One head, two eyes
with hands and feet, bipedal. - [Radio 3] Almost identical to humans. - [Jake] The amount of times they say it, like, you feel like you're going crazy. It's like the game is trying
to play a trick on you, especially because once you see these supposedly humanoid
aliens with two arms, two legs. the whole nine yards,
they're kind of just frogs. Why did they never say
after saying so many times that they look like humans
why didn't they just mention that they kind of also look like frogs? What is going on? So that was a wild trip,
just some of the silliest, dumbest, weirdest bits of
dialogue in video games. There's definitely room for a part two. So we want to hear yours
down in the comments 'cause there are so
many other classic lines we haven't covered yet, so we
want to know from you guys. But of these lines here, do you have any vivid memories
of stumbling upon these? Of course, if you wanna
check out the full versions of these, they'll all be linked in the description down below,
so go and check those out, but thank you guys very
much for sticking around and talking games with us today. If you like this video, all you gotta do is click that like button. Thank you, but as always, thanks for watching and
we'll see you guys next time.
