Hey everyone, and welcome to TopThink. Today, we are going to learn about 10 signs
someone is going to betray you. Now, let’s begin. 1. Creating Distance
How do you know when someone is going to break your trust? Some untrustworthy people create physical
and emotional distance from their friends. Why? Because they’re preparing to stab them in
the back. An untrustworthy person sees their lies coming
from a mile away. To them, it doesn’t feel sudden or surprising,
but it feels sudden to you. when a friend stabs you in the back, you’re
caught off guard. You’re left wondering, “what did I do
wrong?” You’re the one whose trust is broken, and
you’re the one picking up the pieces of your friendship. So how do you know when someone is getting
ready to betray you? What does that physical or emotional distance
look like? They may start by pushing you out of their
life. They will stop responding to your messages. They won’t return your calls. When you invite them somewhere, there’s
a good chance they won’t show up. You notice your friend creating distance,
it’s possible this person doesn’t value you as a friend any longer. They’ve emotionally withdrawn from the relationship,
so they aren’t interested in preserving your connection. The same thing can happen in romantic relationships. An untrustworthy partner will spend less and
less time with you. They’ll stop telling you about their day,
or maybe they won’t show up for dates and dinners like they used to. All of these are signs that someone is nudging
you out of their life. If they’re pulling themselves away from
you, there’s a good chance they’re going to break your trust. 2. The Emotional Mask
When you spend time with your closest friends and family, you learn to let your guard down. You can be yourself. You can be honest. You can express genuine emotions and vulnerabilities
without worrying how the other person perceives you. That’s one of the greatest advantages of
strong, trusting relationships. When they are going well, friends and partners
can take off their masks and be themselves. But what happens to those masks when your
friendship or relationship is falling apart? If your friend or partner has become untrustworthy,
they may put their masks back on. For example, they may act unusually nice or
polite. Kindness isn’t always suspicious. Some people are naturally kind and polite,
but context is important. If you know someone who’s acting uncharacteristically
nice, that is a big red flag. Because this person isn’t comfortable being
themselves around you. They may not trust you anymore, or maybe they’re
trying to withdraw from the relationship. Either way, something has gone wrong, and
the other person is hiding their real personality. In more severe cases, people wear masks to
manipulate or take advantage of others. Someone may be overly polite to you because
they want to control your opinion of them. They show you a picture-perfect version of
themselves, while hiding their flaws and weaknesses. Look out for suspiciously nice people in your
life. If they’re wearing a mask, there’s almost
always a reason why. 3. Inattentive Listening
If someone is going to betray, they may stop listening to you. They won’t make nearly as many investments
in your life, like asking questions or listening to your stories. Instead, they may zone out when you start
talking. Chances are, they’ve lost interest in you
and your relationship. When a trustworthy person loses interest,
they confront their friends and partners, and they go their separate ways. Untrustworthy people, on the other hand, loiter
in the relationship. They may be using you to satisfy a deeper
need of their own, or maybe they’re just taking advantage of your friendship. So pay attention to the way your friends and
partners listen to you. When you’re talking, do they seem interested? Do they ask good questions? Or do they only perk up when you say something
that affects their life? Untrustworthy people are socially selfish. They’re only interested in their own lives,
and they neglect the needs of friends and partners. So, if you notice someone tuning you out,
be careful. It’s possible this person doesn’t value
you as an equal. Or maybe they’re only interested in themselves. Either way, these people are more likely to
betray your trust. 4. Intentional Exclusion
An untrustworthy person intentionally excludes you. Let’s say your friends are meeting for lunch
over the weekend. An untrustworthy friend tells everyone else
you’re busy, even though you were never invited. But why do untrustworthy people exclude their
friends? They may be trying to isolate you. They want to get closer to your friends when
you’re not around—and, eventually, leave you behind. By stealing your friends away from you, an
untrustworthy person is trying to gather allies. They want other people to choose them over
you. That way, when your friend betrays you, they’ll
stay in control, while you are left alone. If your friend is trying to leave you out,
don’t be afraid to speak up. Your untrustworthy friend may be manipulating
you and your other friends. But, if you wait too long, your friends won’t
know who to trust. 5. Power Plays
Exclusion is one-way untrustworthy people seek power over their friends and partners. They crave control and dominance in their
relationships, but your confidence and happiness usually pay the price. Let’s try an example. Some untrustworthy people gain power by making
you doubt yourself. This manipulative tactic is called gaslighting. Gaslighting is a popular tool used by liars
and manipulators to create confusion and self-doubt. When you start doubting yourself, an untrustworthy
person pushes their own agenda, even if they’re feeding you nothing but lies. Once an untrustworthy person gains power in
the relationship, they take you and your trust for granted. They take advantage of you whenever they feel
like it. And they justify their lies by passing the
blame or playing the victim. Respectful, trustworthy friends aren’t interested
in lopsided power dynamics. They don’t want you to feel bad about yourself. They don’t want you to doubt your own memories
or experiences. If you know someone that does, they don’t
have your best interests in mind. If they haven’t betrayed you already, there’s
a good chance they will soon. 6. The Criminal Reaction
How do this person react when they feel vulnerable? Do they express their feelings? Are they willing to communicate and work through
their problems? Or does the conversation immediately go south? When an untrustworthy person feels exposed,
their mood takes a turn for the worse. They get angry, sad, or insecure, because
they don’t actually trust you as much as they say they do. If they did, they wouldn’t have a problem
expressing their genuine feelings. They wouldn’t be ashamed of the way they
think or feel, because they want to be true to themselves. If an untrustworthy person feels vulnerable,
they act like a criminal caught in a lie. They backtrack and panic, and they take their
frustration out on you. Pay attention to these moments of weakness. If they refuse to show you who they really
are, it’s because they have something to hide. 7. The Flaky Friend
Before someone breaks your trust, they may go back on small promises, like flaking on
plans you made together. Flaky people rarely value their friendships
or relationships the way they should. They don’t value the commitments they make
to other people, because they don’t respect anyone’s time as much as their own. If you know someone who’s always cancelling
at the last second, stay on high alert. Flakiness is a big red flag that someone is
not invested, respectful, or trustworthy. They string people along, knowing full well
they’re going to lose interest or bail 5 minutes before. Don’t count on these people to keep their
promises, because a flaky person could let you down at any moment. 8. An Inconsistent Image
Is their view of themselves consistent with reality? Do they believe they’re greater than they
actually are? Some people call it arrogance. Others call it egotism. But it all boils down to this: they have an
inconsistent view of themselves. In other words, they see themselves as one
thing, but, in reality, they are something else entirely. You might hear someone describe themselves
as quiet and respectful, but they are one of the loudest people you know. Or maybe someone says, “I’m an intelligent
person,” when you know that couldn’t be further from the truth. If their self-image is inconsistent, stay
on your toes. People with inaccurate views of themselves
often have inaccurate views of their friendships and partnerships. If their views are skewed heavily in their
favor, they can easily justify betraying your trust. 9. Spilling Secrets
Does this person spill your secrets or leak private information? Do they gossip about your life to anyone who
will listen? Untrustworthy people will not protect your
secrets, because they don’t value your privacy. Instead, they treat your secrets like celebrity
gossip. They talk behind your back, and they use your
secrets to spice up their own lives. Why? Because leaking your private information gives
them power. For an untrustworthy person, making fun or
you or spilling your secrets may be fun. This person may not realize how much damage
they’re doing. And unfortunately they may not care. 10. Behavioral Projection
Has your friend ever projected their emotions onto you? Projection is a common psychological defense
mechanism. When someone is feeling a strong emotion they
cannot understand or digest, they project that negativity onto you, accusing you of
something they are guilty of themselves. Let’s say your friend is consistently insecure. They may project their personal insecurities
to avoid confronting those inner demons. If they don’t like the way they look, for
example, they might criticize your clothes or your appearance. People who project their emotions are prone
to betrayal, because they rarely look at the world through an unbiased lens. They may not have the emotional intelligence
to understand how they’re feeling. Or maybe they’re too deep in denial to say
their feelings out loud. Either way, when they get defensive, you’re
the one that suffers. And that creates an unhealthy friendship. Thank you for watching TopThink, and be sure
to subscribe, because more incredible content is on the way.
