Monica, can you come into my office please?
Yeah... Oh my god! What!? Your office!? This is your office!? Oh my god! Gross! What is
this place!? Now, Monica I have called you here because as the CEO of SMASH English I would like
you to write me a report. Um... a report? Yeah. I want to know what people like about SMASH English
and what people don't like about SMASH English also give me some recommendations or suggestions
about what i could do as the CEO of SMASH English to improve SMASH English because right now
uh things aren't looking great... Oh my god! Seriously? You want me to do that for you? Wow I
feel like a business woman! Just go! Get to work! Okay then Mr. Toby I'll get to work! Bye!
For part two of the B2 First writing exam you might decide to write a report
but what is a report? And what do you need to do to get the highest marks possible? My
name is Toby, this is SMASH English and here is everything you need to know about writing
a report for the B2 First Cambridge exam! Reports are so boring. Yes, really boring... but
also easy! Why? Because they are so formal and so mechanical. If you are not a creative person
(and that's okay) then a report is a great option for you in part two of the B2 First writing
exam. So then let's look at Monica's question: You recently received an email from the CEO of
SMASH English... Thank you for your contribution to SMASH English. SMASH English is always looking
to improve its content. Please send us a report outlining the positive and negative aspects
of SMASH English and where we could improve in the future. Okay so um SMASH English is okay
but there needs to be more Monica in the videos, so um put more Monica in the videos.... And we
need... yeah we need more hot guys because I need a boyfriend and the situation is getting
urgent! So more hot guys... And I need more clothes to wear because I wear the same thing
in every video and I know, I know I look really hot in what I wear but I think for the audience
they would like to see me wearing something more ...sensual... Do you know what I mean?
And anything else? Um yeah! Monica needs sushi when she works. That's very important.
I love sushi, oh my god! I'm finished! No no no. First we need to plan! Oh my god this
is so boring. This means we need to read the question with a pen and underline the key pieces
of information. Number one: who is the report for? Who is the target reader? A report will always
be for a superior so that means we must write formally. We cannot use contractions, we cannot
use informal phrasal verbs and we cannot use idioms. Next we must underline what we need to
do. A report will always ask you to do three things and the third thing will always be to
give a recommendation or a suggestion. Easy! Okay so in this example I must: one: describe
the positive aspects of SMASH English. Two: describe the negative aspects of SMASH English
and number three: I've gotta give recommendations on how to improve SMASH English. So that's three
tasks yeah. Oh and I'm writing to Toby, the CEO, so I've gotta be super formal yeah. Next we need
to organize our paragraphs. Every report needs an introduction and then we need one paragraph for
each task. So in this example paragraph one will be our introduction. Paragraph two will talk about
the positive aspects of SMASH English. Paragraph three will talk about the negative aspects
of SMASH English and paragraph four will give a recommendation or a suggestion for the future.
Also a report should be between 140 and 190 words. This means that our introduction and conclusion
should be between 30 and 40 words and our two body paragraphs (paragraphs two and three) should
be between 50 and 60 words. But please do not count your words in the exam because you do not
have time! The point is this: if you write too few words - below 140 words - you probably have not
included all the information necessary to complete the tasks. If you write more than 190 words you
are probably including irrelevant information and that's a terrible thing. Both of these things
will lose you marks and we don't want that! This is why we plan to make sure that in each paragraph
we are completing a task. Easy? Very easy! Next we need to think of titles. Titles? Yes!
Titles! This is super duper important! This is very very very important! When you write a report
every paragraph must have a title but don't worry! These do not need to be creative titles.
This is not an article (article writing, click here! Bye!) No. This is not an article.
Your titles do not need to be creative. They must be factual. They must let the reader know what
information will be contained in the paragraph. So what is a very boring and factual title,
Monica, for the introduction? Um how about "introduction"?. Yeah exactly: introduction!
Um what about the other paragraphs? Um for paragraph two we could call it "SMASH
English: the positive". And then paragraph three uh "SMASH English: the negative" and then
for the last paragraph we could call it um "Recommendations for the future". Yeah? Done!
Exactly! Please do not forget to write titles. If you forget your titles you will die and
please don't die because SMASH English needs subscribers... Subscribe. So then how do we
write our introduction? I'm going to tell you about all the good and bad things about
SMASH English and then recommend some stuff. Finished. This is far too informal. An
introduction for a report should do two things: Number one: state the aims of the report.
Why are you writing the report? What is the report trying to do? And number two: state where we
got the information from to write the report. So then Monica, try again. This report has
been written to describe both positive and negative aspects of SMASH English and provide
recommendations for the future. Notice here we have used THE PASSIVE. This is because a report is
IMPERSONAL. Oh but I want it to be all about me! No we do not want the report to be a personal text
so, as Monica has done here, try to avoid speaking in the first person. The passive is a good way
to do this. And now Monica, how are you going to get the information to write the report? How are
you going to discover what the positive and the negative aspects of SMASH English are? Um, I'll
use my brain. I have so many opinions, trust me... No! Because this is too personal! A report is not
a personal piece of writing. It is not about you. So instead you could carry out a survey or conduct
interviews to find out what people think about SMASH English. Okay then I will interview the
staff at SMASH English we'll see what they think. Okay, yeah, good idea. So you must state this in
your introduction. In order to do this interviews were conducted with SMASH English staff. Here we
have the formal linking expression IN ORDER TO. We have used THE PASSIVE again to not put the
focus on the writer and we have used the formal collocation to CONDUCT AN INTERVIEW. Oh hey,
Bruce! I'm going to ask you a few questions. Um what do you think are the positive aspects
of SMASH English? What do you want? Why are you asking me this? I'm writing a report for Toby!
Come on Bruce this is really important for my career as a business woman! Uh yeah well...
the best thing is I can uh I can drink at work. Um okay and um, what's the worst thing? Uh and the
uh... the worst thing is I have to, uh I have to work sometimes. It's a.... It's very difficult. Oh
my god I'll find someone else that actually takes this seriously okay... [ __ ] Oh hi, Duke! Oh hi,
Monica! You look very beautiful today! Um yeah whatever. Um I'm writing a report for Toby. It's
super important. Um, what do you think is the best thing about SMASH English? That's easy! You of
course! Monica, you're funny, you're beautiful and you're intelligent! Yeah, Duke! This is great! I
think the same so I'll write this down for both of us. Remember the information you present in your
report does not have to be factually accurate, just invent stuff! That's fine! In our second
paragraph: "SMASH English the positive" we need to write about the positive aspects of SMASH
English that we learned about from our interviews. Of those interviewed one hundred percent reported
that they highly enjoyed the involvement of Monica in videos. One participant remarked that Monica
was beautiful, intelligent and had great skin. From the interviews it seems that Monica is
an essential component of SMASH English and many would not watch if she were not a part of
the organization. Monica, seriously? Um Toby this is science, yeah? I did interviews!
You cannot argue with science that's like a scientific fact. This paragraph starts off
by describing the findings of the interviews. Yeah that I'm great! Then it describes what we
can learn from the interviews. That we need more me! Yep okay so the findings are that the people
interviewed love Monica and what we learned from this is that Monica is very important to SMASH
English. Notice we have used the reporting verbs REPORTED and REMARKED to document what
people said. We have also used a SECOND CONDITIONAL to describe what we can learn from
the interviews. Great grammar! Absolutely great! And now we need to do the same thing for our third
paragraph: "SMASH English: the negative". And what about the worst aspects of SMASH English,
Duke? Is there anything you don't like? Um... What about Bruce, Duke? Um do you like Bruce? Eww,
Bruce... Horrible... Horrible, isn't he? Oh no! I'm scared of Bruce... Oh yeah! I hate Bruce too!
Eww, Bruce... Let's say then that we hate him, um we don't want him here and he drinks
too much... and he smells. Yeah um okay, yeah, yeah sure. Hey so uh, Toby? I've
done all of my super scientific formal interviews... they're here. 100 percent
of people interviewed complained about Bruce. They explained that Bruce's behavior
often made viewers feel uncomfortable. Several of those interviewed felt that Bruce's
behavior towards Monica was particularly offensive. This suggests that Bruce has a negative
impact on SMASH English. Like the last paragraph we have outlined the findings of our interviews
and then described what we can learn from them. So here we have discussed negative comments about
Bruce and the lesson that we have learned is Bruce has a negative impact. Again we have used the
reporting verbs EXPLAIN and FEEL. Please remember not to use the first person. Instead of saying
"I therefore think that Bruce has a negative impact on SMASH English" we said "This suggests
that...". Remember do not make things personal. And now we need to write our conclusion and
this should complete our last task. We must give a suggestion or a recommendation about
how to improve SMASH English in the future but remember this suggestion or recommendation must be
linked to what we talked about in paragraphs two and three. It must be connected to the results
of your interview or your survey in this case interview. So I think Monica should be in
every video and Bruce must be fired! Bye! Monica, slow down! This is a report! It is not a
personal text and I do not care what you think. Instead you need to interpret the findings of the
interviews and state what you think they suggest we should do in the future to improve SMASH
English. This recommendation is not based on your thoughts, they're based on evidence and how you
interpret that evidence. Okay so the findings of my scientific research were that the people love
Monica but the people also hate Bruce so SMASH English should have more Monica but less Bruce,
right? Yes, yes exactly! So do it! Based on the interviews it is clear that Monica is incredibly
popular. Therefore Monica should be promoted more on the channel. On the other hand Bruce is
unpopular with SMASH English staff. As a result, his involvement with the company are
to be terminated. Notice how we have immediately stated BASED ON THE INTERVIEWS. Thus
we are not discussing our opinions but something factual. Our recommendations are therefore
a result of research and not random opinion. So here is our final report, complete
with titles for each paragraph. Oh my god, guys! Do you like it? I'm so proud of it!
It's uh... It's marvellous. So remember: Number one: a report is between 140 and 190 words.
Number two: underline each task that you need to complete. The third task is always to make a
recommendation or a suggestion. Number three: organize your paragraphs and please remember
to give each paragraph a title. Number four: be formal! Avoid talking in the first person! Using
the passive will help you with this. Number five: invent data to present in your report. This can be
in the form of interviews or surveys. Number six: in your introduction state the aims of
the report and state what research you did in order to write it. Number seven: in the
next two paragraphs. paragraphs two and three, present your data and state what can be learned
from it. And number eight: in your conclusion please give your recommendation based on the
findings of your research. See? That was easy... I don't have to do the exam. I speak really
great English already so... Good luck! Excuse me! I don't want to disturb your
little game but what is this? Oh hi, Bruce. I did a report for Toby and it says that you
are fired, so go away please. Great skin? Monica, who said this!? You've got a beard! Oh my
god, Bruce! You are so ignorant! I did research! You cannot argue with science! You're literally
a science denier! Oh my god! And with that we are finished! Now you know everything you need to know
about writing a report for the B2 First Cambridge exam. If you liked the video don't forget
to SMASH that like button, subscribe if you haven't already, leave a comment down below!
My name is Toby and this was SMASH English...
