Worst “I Don’t Fit In Here” Experiences

what the worst i don't fit in here experience you've ever had i went to a classical concert in a fancy manor house of sorts at the border between scotland and england they served some food in between the acts of the concert where you would sit at small tables to have it i was the only one below the age of like 60 and everyone looked very posh tried making some smell talk at one of those tables but the old ladies with their hats on seem to be not very keen on talking with a peasant like me you could really see it in their faces in 2007 i went to what i thought was my first aaa meeting it was being held at a church and when i walked into where the meeting was supposed to take place there was five six other men sitting down i took a seat and after a couple of moments pass the meeting starts if my memory is correct i was asked to introduce myself so i said my name isn't i'm an alcoholic after a few moments one of the men let me know that i was at a sex addict's anonymous meeting i apologized and left felt really weird about it at the time but now i just laugh about it went on the company ski trip which sounds posher than it actually is and we have to pay for it out of our wages had to sit on a dinner table with the heads of the company and some other higher people from different companies and the stuff they were talking about in terms of leisure activities were well out of my league when you try to join the conversation and you get a patronizing smile from one of them who doesn't engage with you the conversation dries up pretty quickly finished by dinner and fricked off to the bar if you're paying for it out of your wages it's not a company ski trip it's your own ski trip that your company is invading lol i'm a white guy who's into alt rock and i had some jamaican friends at work they invited me to a basement party they called a splash exactly like what you see in the sean paul get busy video i loved it and everyone was very cool but man did i feel like i stuck out my first holiday in foster care was christmas 2010 i was 14 years old a freshman in high school i missed my family and i didn't know anyone there except my foster parents i felt completely like an alien amongst 50 people i was young scared and alone i went on my phone and my foster mom raised her voice and told me to get off that made me snap and i started tearing up so i went outside in the cold to cry by myself so i wouldn't make a scene i cried behind a car in the dark in the snow that fell a few days prior this old man comes outside and calmly talks to me he tells me that he used to be in foster care too i don't remember what he said exactly but he made me laugh and feel a little better that old man turned out to be who i would call grandpa ernie a few years down the road he passed away a couple springs ago he always made sure everyone felt welcomed and always would break tension silence with a joke that made everyone laugh he went through his own heck growing up and he did his best to make sure no one else had to he sounds like a good guy i'm happy you had someone who was there for you i'm in my late 20s and going to the same clothing stores i've been going to for over a decade seeing 12 plus year old girls feeling lost not knowing where to shop my casual clothes have literally not changed since i was a teen my professional wardrobe is so different from my casual clothes that it looks like two different guys in my closet i watched a lot of pokemon when i was like eight i went to a local anime convention and i was through confused and awkward everyone was in cosplay and talking about anime and i just sat there looking at my pokemon cards all depressed i once interviewed for a job and was taken around the office to meet everyone and see how things worked but it was one of those types of places where they do morning cheers everyone is ultra peppy and cut throat it was a sales job with competitive territories and the energy was just too much as an introverted laid-back and competitive worker i 100 did not belong in that environment wanted to learn to play guitar found out about a class for beginner sessions for adults a call up they say yeah come along we have a mixed group and we will see you in the morn great turn up to this little church-like building and head in guy says you must be me 27-28 at time take a seat and we will get going in a minutes please no time first to arrive and the seats were tiny but i didn't think anything of it at the time just assumed it was what was available next minute a group of small children rush in and take their places about five six years old with their guitars teacher starts taking the lesson i'm obvi feeling awkward as i'm like tom hanks in big and wanting to get out as soon as possy but too polite to just get up and walk out teacher then announces that we will be getting up on stage at the end to show what we've learned please note all these little shoots are 10x better than me but i'm committed now and maybe it won't be so bad until the door opens and all of the parents walk in to watch the show so there i was sitting on a little chair with my knees higher than my head strumming along to some tune i couldn't play surrounded by five six-year-old and parents looking at me with that face you know wants to laugh recently moved to china due to work china is fine and all food is exceptionally nice and the general cost of living is significantly lower although i do speak some mandarin and am somewhat familiar with china due to my mother being chinese i do often feel the differences like how alien this culture here is to me it's a very odd feeling seeing all these people that look the same as me yet completely different i'm indian but was born and raised in the us and i visited india when i was 7 and again when i was 18. i don't remember the first visit too well but the second time i had the exact same feeling you described my mom was born in a village and if my dad hadn't decided to get his masters in the u.s or hadn't met my mom i probably would have had a completely different life in southwestern australia i was there working for a bit and went out with some locals we were walking home from the bar when one of them said he wanted to go for a bit of a longer walk so we detoured around another block suddenly we were walking through the bush and then we pop out the other side near this sketchy house a really sketchy dude comes out looks at me and asks one of the guys who i am they say i'm canadian and he asks me a few questions presumably to hear my accent then they hand him a few hundred dollars and he hands them a few small bags of drugs on the way home the guys i'm with stop open up one of the bags and smash the contents up on a rock and snort it i politely decline suddenly everyone i'm with is high on them once i was familiar with the area we were in i got the frick out of there yeah country australia has real bad ice issue in some places especially in the more impoverished rural towns my mum and dad have been divorced since i was eight years old so 20 years my dad has a girlfriend who he's recently moved in with she has adult children and young grandchildren anyway it was my dad's birthday a little while ago and i went over to see him and over the time i was there more of his girlfriend's family turned up i didn't fit in my dad has kept us very separate until the last 12 months and i've worked really hard on my relationship with my dad over the last few years but had thought he wasn't able to give me the relationship i wanted to have with him and i'd come to terms that that is how he is except it's not how he is at all because he has that relationship with his partner's children and grandkids and i sat there feeling ridiculously out of place i didn't fit in he only lives 25 minutes away but they've all made very little effort with me but they all see each other a lot i didn't fit in and i left after four hours driving back to my home with tears in my eyes wondering why i was so upset and then i realized it's because once again it's just another situation where i don't fit in and i'm not gonna lie that little eight-year-old girl inside of me cried a lot for a week or so it was by far the worst i don't fit in here experience i've had yet it broke my heart a little actually sorry for rambling i guess i kinda kept that to myself i just dropped everything to pursue a career in art it's been my dream to open up a shop and to just make things and paint i've been drawing all of my life and i'm honestly not bad a few weeks ago i joined a local artist collective the first meeting we were showing our art and my heart dropped everyone had these gallery level social justice pieces and there i was with my greeting card and wedding art i've always struggled with confidence and impostor syndrome but that hit me hard just how out of my league this group was i'm staying in it because i think it will challenge me to expand and grow but dang do i feel incompetent every time i see them i know this feeling and i don't do wedding and greeting card stuff i think the majority of artists have impostor syndrome for myself i look at paintings i did a year ago and can see how far i've come i have to focus on how much i am improving instead of how skilled other people are i'm a filmmaker in my younger years i made a film that was received well and i got invited to speak at a big shot conference oscar winners high flying producers big name actors no one gave a crap about my little talk and in between sessions i had no one to hang with it felt like crap after the first day of a three-day weekend i went to my hotel room had a panic attack and cried to my bf via skype i'm a fairly confident person so even as the weird one at school i never really felt out of place but that conference was the worst it was the only time in my life that i felt like such an awful hurried worthless loser but i knew i had to stick it out if i wanted any sort of career in the industry so i took a deep breath gathered all the dignity and courage i could and forced myself to go back the next day i suffered through the quiet moments pretending i was back at school and didn't give a crap what anyone thought it also helped a lot to put things into perspective that the conference was going to be one of many many moments in my career in that people were just there to do business i could potentially come back someday with some business for them and then people would talk to me that was easy for my ego to understand after i gave my talk i actually got approached by some producers they gave me their cards and i made some connections i still talk to to this day but that first day will always stick with me and once in a while when i'm feeling like a cocky butt as i normally do i think back to that low moment and it helps to reorient my thinking even if i had walked away from that weekend with zero cards it would have been worthwhile just for that change in mindset you might not need or want to see this but as a random internet stranger i am so proud of you you had a rough experience but you allowed yourself to fully feel it out and moved on that's a big achievement and you deserve to feel self-confident and happy about it i'm giving you a standing ovation in my head way to go i came to germany in 2017 with my msc in environmental sciences from hungary a job to find was hard so i had a plan b i took a job by deutsche bahn german railways i don't really know how to say it in english but basically i control train stations and set routes for trains called far deen's a lighter in germany look it up if you want to so i took the schooling i had my first station and as an apprentice or something like that i had to go to the tracks and inform people about where their train comes i felt pretty crappy it's normally not part of the job all the passengers were well-suited men and women lots of offices around here and i was in a dirty safety west i just felt that i belonged to them not here in the end i found myself here my next job will be at the central station in nuremberg which is a pretty big deal like a flight control tower with trains if you can love trains my next job will be at the central station in nuremberg which is a pretty big deal like a flight control tower with trains if you can love trains i hope your new job brings you all the happiness in the world i'm expat dutch meaning i was born there and have a passport moving to the netherlands as a teenager for the first time did not go well teenagers are buttholes but even more so if you are any kind of foreign and don't speak the language perfectly oof i'm about to be in a similar situation hopefully it's different in this country and age group going to back to school night i am a single dad and not wealthy well not financially my kids go to a school in a very affluent neighborhood the dad to mom ratio was roughly three stroke ten they all had very expensive clothes and jewelry here i am in my shorts and a t-shirt most of the cars were lexus bmw mercedes anyway tesla maserati or some other exotic but luckily my kids don't seem to feel it nor are they mistreated so that's good keep working king i'm a college professor got my first job out of grad school quit at the end of the second year found out while quitting that they were about to fire me it was one of the 10 largest universities in the usa today i teach at a tiny liberal arts college been there over a decade and they vote me professor of the year an average of once every three years here i fit there i didn't there was big research driven prestige hungry here they want me to take good care of the students that i can do i love my job my friend is the type of person who's friends with everybody i've known him since we were real little so i'd say i'm one of his closest friends when we hang out though he gets caught up in making plans with all of these people whom i don't know or i don't talk to at all being nice i agree to just be around while he picks up and drops off all these people sometimes we go in their house and hang out in the polar opposite of these people i'm quiet and smoking isn't really my thing so i'm awkwardly sitting on this person's couch while everyone is smoking and laughing with each other i get all the attention from their dogs so that's a plus i have mild autism and i decided to try doing an autism meet-up with other autistic people everyone else was way more severe than me it was fine and an interesting perspective but it wasn't my kind of place my mom tried joining a facebook group for moms of kids with neurological disabilities and had a similar experience everyone was the parent of a severely autistic child who would never live on their own and that she was with a child with adhd and ocd also she was the only mom who didn't feel me having challenges ruined her life walking into the cafeteria food in hand looking around trying to find a place to sit or all right guys get in partners for this project and you just sit there with your eyes glued to the desk having two friends in one class and they choose each other and your teacher says no groups of three is the worst feeling work mostly i hate my job because of the toxic environment and co-workers and in large groups of people where i don't know anybody i've always felt like i fit into very different crowds i'm very at home with a group of redneck friends out camping and hunting for the weekend and i can fit in at formal business dinner type settings one time i was invited to what i thought was the latter by my employer i'm very middle class but i was completely out of my element it was a silent charity auction for disabled children they had various donated items up for auction you could add your name to a list with your bid and someone else could add a higher bid under that the cheapest thing they had to bid on was a barbie doll it was 375 dollars i didn't bid on anything later that evening i was talking to a co-worker who was a friend of the owner he told me he won a horse yeah didn't fit in i can't imagine being in a point in life where i can bid on a surprise horse they're so expensive to feed let alone house properly due to the space they need the ball at my college the week before graduation people have compared it to college prom i never wanted to go but i won a free ticket in a raffle so i couldn't pass up saving ninety dollars it doesn't mean i fit in there though you should have sold it for like fifty dollars cheaper and you profit i went to an alternative school everyone was goth and i was just a normal kid that was playing sports and stuff and wearing colorful clothes with kids in all black took me two years of working at a place to realize just two-faced and toxic most of my former co-workers were except for a handful realized most of them didn't like me so i left me right now it's part of what led me to seeing that i want to go to grad school and not continue working in this field after work party with my colleagues we were just eating some snacks before heading home but i realized i had nothing in common with any of them i never wished so hard to have said no to something i was invited i'm in a metal band and love playing the music and love listening to the music but when we play shows i feel out of place among the other members of the scene because nearly everyone i know and interact with are potheads drunk's party animals and i'm not about that i drink casually but don't get drunk as i fear becoming an alcoholic because my family has a history of it in contrast i'm very subdued and work hard to maintain success in my career i'm the only white collar in the scene in my area which makes me feel like an outclass especially since a good portion of them who are blue collar make more than i do lol i do like the people in the scene some are amazing friends and the vocalist in my band is like a brother to me but i sometimes feel uncomfortable with the whole scene i also feel like and butthole around them when i mention my career because i'm afraid i sound like i think i'm above everyone or something but i can't imagine not playing music anymore it feels amazing when i'm actually playing i was invited to a somali wedding by my so molly friend and i was excited to go when i got there i arrived 45 minutes after the time i was told and i was still one of the first people to show up when all the women started coming and they all sat everywhere else with their friends and family and not with the only white girl there the one who invited me was nowhere to be found so i just smiled doubly of everyone i made eye contact with being the only one who doesn't speak somali or even know anyone so awkward and yet i have fond memories of that night when i moved with my family from a big city to a small town of less than 500 in south dakota at the rough age of 13 the very small class at the school i started mid-year knew little outside of the town and their church and had all known each other since kindergarten this was in 2007 so i was at the peak of my emo phase checkerboard vans eyeliner etc the whole bit it blew their minds they were all scared of me it was quite lonely my uncle who lives in the us also lives in a small south dakota town my brother who is an argentinian extrovert went there for two weeks and stayed with my uncle and cousins who he went to school with i bet he felt out of place there i had just started a waitressing job and while i was waiting to interview i actually saw grower of the wait staff looking at me and whispering to each other i needed the job so i didn't care in hindsight i should have got up and walked right out i was hired but failed the menu test and had to retake it the manager told them and they started bugging me about it i worked there part-time for about two years and they would bully and harass me every chance they got i was a good worker polite and helped them any way i could but they still ostracized me that was four years ago and i still can't wrap my head around what could have made them hate me so much seeing as their ball started before they got to know you with the whispering while you waited for the interview i'd say their crap had nothing to do with you and everything to do with them being a pack of mean-spirited maladapted morons i was at a low point in my life unemployed no support hungry and dressed in worn working class clothing i was out with a buddy who had as little class as i did at the time we somehow had managed to find a few dollars and figured we should go have a drink unfortunately the place we went to was full of sailors not burly longshoremen not popeye and not shifty i'd cut throats no these were the kind of sailors that owned and raised yachts we go in walk out to the patio and stop everyone there was white everyone there was dressed in white the entire patio went quiet and literally everyone stared at us we immediately turned tail and left i think we ended up sharing a bottle of cheap wine under a bridge that day funny thing is i bet we had much more fun under that bridge than we would have had surrounded by all those clean young snarticles snarticles bravo at any gathering of my ex-in-laws they drank like alcoholics which many of them are and i don't drink at all the more drunk they got the less i fit in they had three topics of conversation one how drunk they are two how drunk they were last weekend and three how drunk they planned to get next weekend these were grown adults with kids as someone who doesn't drink at all either listening to people just talking about those three things gets really old really fast fortunately i now know a lot of people who have more interesting things to say than that at the drive-through window at dutch bros coffee they're super sweet cheerful and it's their job to connect with customers but i feel like i need to rehearse what i'm going to talk about before i get there social anxiety keeps my loyal starbucks customer i'm sorry i almost never go to dutch bros because i cannot stand their brand of customer service it is so in your face and over the top definitely university for me my family were very pushy that i go to university mostly because they saw it as the best way to get out of my hometown where there was no real work opportunities i got knocked back several times until i finally got good enough grades to be accepted on a maths based bachelor's program the classes were both intensely boring and way over my head at the same time my classmates were all nice enough but came from a more middle-class background and as such we didn't have a lot in common in the issues i was facing financially didn't seem to affect them i ended up working full-time on top of classes to pay my student accommodation my parents made too much money for me to get any real amount and loans or bursaries but they had a ton of financial responsibilities and couldn't afford to help me out i ended up getting drunk every morning to stop caring about feeling out of place or out of my depth showed up to work drunk on a daily basis also the last straw for me was when i was in a communal area of my accommodation preparing my work uniform and one of my classmates came in and asked if i was getting ready to head to work i said yeah and he replied yeah i know what that's like i had to get a job last summer so my parents would buy me my car that really just summed up how different i felt i ended up leaving at the end of the year with nothing but a bit of debt and a job as a waiter but leaving was honestly the best decision i made anytime i'm out with my husband's friend's wives they get drunk and loud and shrill and i just want to go home and watch british police procedurals on the couch actually any group where the volume just goes up ridiculously i feel like i'm 70 years old and need these kids off my lawn but manage your freaking volume ah yes the classic hyperactive woo girl i'm sorry that really sucks 10 plus years of being friends with a group of people who were in hindsight openly mean and nasty to me it finally hit one day and i left and never looked back i joined a sorority in college that in and of itself was a major i don't belong here mindfuck but when i got my big and i went to her house for the first time i absolutely knew that i didn't belong she and her mom live alone her dad passed when she was 12 in a giant house in one of the richest districts in maryland i pulled into their neighborhood and every house there looks like it's worth at least a million dollars her mom is a high up lawyer for the state and makes hello money like they have a huge beach house kind of money it made me uncomfortable i grew up in a small rural town with not a lot of money and being around so many people who could spend 100 and not even blink at it gave me very distinct i don't belong here vibes don't get me wrong my big and her mom are wonderful lovely people just wealthy as frick my friend and her family were living at a country club while their house was being built i went to pick her up once and say hi to her parents but because i was wearing jeans i had to use the employee entrance that taught me i would never understand the wealthy so basically i'm the guy who always ends up as a third wheel i'll be hanging with a friend or whatever when all of a sudden their bfgf would come out of nowhere and then i instantly move behind the two of them just being awkward it sucks i was a young woman who worked for an environmental justice non-profit very much a hippie-chic kind of person we helped an event as sundance film festival for a counter-independent film festival at this event there was a person who was working the ticketing me being the technologically challenged nature lady that i was had a hard time logging into the wi-fi this was like the early 2000s before smartphones and stuff it was all still new anyway dude gave me his email and after the festival we became email pimples fast forward a few months and i'm planning another event in nyc for said organization dude lives in nyc and we make plans to hang out i also ended up staying at his apartment but a guest room we hang out hold hands walking around nyc i'm still a hippy chic environmentalist in all honesty i still am just turn down a bit it's fun and we like each other a little bit after that he invites me to his friend's extended weekend get together at his friend's ranch and new mexico i can fly for free because my dad works for an airline blue collar job not as a pilot so i say yes and meet up with him for the weekend so i get to the airport meet up with dude and his friends first thing we had a private party bus to the ranch weird but okay i get there and the place is a freaking mansion with servants and all of that his friends are rich bros with supermodel girlfriends some of them were actual professional models and i am not it was the most awkward weekend for me as the vegetarian hippie chic environmental justice non-profit working poor person not supermodel self could have ever had anyway i really did not fit in there if you are new to the channel you can subscribe i publish new videos every day until then check another video [Music] bye for now

Channel: UE Stories

Views: 77,470

Keywords: do not belong, do not belong here, does not belong, don't fit, dont fit in at work, #updootst, updoot, reddit, r/askreddit, askreddit, ask reddit, r/, \r, r\, best of reddit, reddit stories, reddit story, top posts, funniest posts, funny, funny posts, funny reddit stories, funny askreddit, reddit funny, askreddit funny, askreddit stories, reddit stories 2021, people of reddit, sub, reddit cringe, memes, toadfilms, updoot everything, updoot reddit, story, stories, rslash, comedy, fresh

Id: S1ZY6O4XMRY

Length: 28min 48sec (1728 seconds)

Published: Tue Oct 19 2021