Why You Need A Plan For Your Money!

[Music] foreign live from the headquarters of Ramsey Solutions broadcasting from the PODS moving and storage Studios it's the Ramsay show we help people build wealth do work that they love and create actual amazing relationships open phones at triple eight eight two five five two two five Dr John baloney Ramsey personality number one best-selling author and host of the very popular Ramsey networks produced Dr John deloney show where we deal with all kinds of relationship and mental health issues he's my co-host today as we're taking your questions phone number is triple eight eight two five five two two five this is where Common Sense meets reality and life and it does it every day here thanks for joining us the call is free and some say the advice is worth exactly what you pay for it Elizabeth is with us in Dallas hi Elizabeth welcome to the Ramsay show hello how are you great what's up hi so I have a question I've been with my partner boyfriend for seven years and we have two small children together and I've recently brought up the fact that we should get married and actually have one bank account and do everything together and he says that he doesn't want to do that but marriage is not why he doesn't want to do marriage and he says because he's already previously been married and he's just not he's just not going to do it why does he think he's not married now I'm not sure he's got all he's got everything he had to do with marriage right now so now my next question he gets sick he gets sick he wants you to make him chicken soup right yes yeah what's the difference in this in marriage I'm confused well he's not interested that either accept him or or what shall we do so Elizabeth I want you to hear what he's actually telling you he's telling you he went all in on somebody once and got hurt or broke up with or whatever and he's looking at you after seven years and two children and saying you're not worth that I'd rather um have my illusion of singleness in my back pocket at all times so that I can preserve my little fragile ego meanwhile Playhouse and play house with you and you be my wife and I'll keep all the equity and everything and I'll keep all my money and I'll basically pay you like a live-in nanny um but this is all mine that's what he's telling you I hate that for you I'm sorry I hate that for you how old are your babies one is four and the other is one little boy little girl what um it's a one to four year old girl so at this point I'm at the point that I don't know what to do I don't know if 20 years from now your daughter is 24 and she asks you this question what do you tell her I don't know hmm I'm not gonna I I'm not gonna be the person that tells you you got to stay or leave because I don't want I don't want you to hang on to this guy said this that's something that's a decision you're gonna have to own what I will tell you is I think you are worth going all in on and I think you're worth having a home that two people want to do life together and create a safe space to raise these two beautiful little babies you're worth that you're gonna have to make the grown-up decision whether you stay and you try to build a life inside of a cocoon or you make other decisions in two weeks I'll be in two weeks I'll be go ahead I'm sorry go ahead babe what um I'm mostly more afraid if like if I walk away how would I manage with money I haven't worked in a while so that's I'm gonna be truthful that's exactly what's stopping me now from walking away and that's a very real fear I mean that's a very real fear the the data suggests that when men and women split up especially in this situation his net worth will actually go up and yours will go down for a season until you get so pissed off that you become a multi-millionaire later but yeah um but yeah the uh uh so in other words you can't do this today it's Theory because you got babies you have to feed but you can say all right I'm gonna plan my Escape and I'm gonna get my career tooled up and I'm gonna go get a job and I'm gonna start making some serious money and then I get to make decisions from strength rather than from weakness get to walk to something not run from something and then you can walk in and go uh not sure dude that I want to marry you so there's that and that's what we call an Elizabeth burn right when you flip the whole thing around mic drop yeah but that comes from strength and you're you're um when you're scared and broke it keeps you from making decisions so let's move from scared and broke and then remake the decision you might make the decision under strength to stay but you would need to make it from strength rather than from weakness is that logical so if it takes you a year to start making forty thousand dollars a year then take that year and go do it that's fine I got no plan got no problem he ain't going nowhere yeah and you're in Dallas man there will be people that will hire you in about 20 seconds I don't want my kids in daycare then marry their mother hey Elizabeth it's not uncommon in this situation especially after this long that this isn't the only thing that this person won't quote unquote do this person's been telling you that your things you think are funny or stupid and the feelings or concerns you have about any number of things are dumb you can't fill in the blank and after seven years after almost a decade of this you've come to believe that stuff to be true right yeah yeah I don't I don't either because the girl that called here has got more stuff inside of her then she sounds like she does or thinks she does now go get it get you some thank you yeah really I mean don't forget two old guys believe in you yeah and and uh and you got a four-year-old daughter watching to see how mama is a Warrior Princess look out here comes Xena you remember that one yeah but don't make that little weird noise call thing keep that one to yourself Elizabeth don't do that let that only be in your head yeah don't don't do that yeah but yeah you bring that up it's a there's a concern obviously which is financial which is real that's math there is no debate about that and what about my babies and what you bring up is really important there is a ringside seat to oh this is what a mom and a wife are supposed to just accept is reality or I had a ringside seat to watching my mom go from a a live-in boyfriend that told her dude I'm not wasting any more energy on you all the way to a successful business owner Warrior Princess Running Shop and they got to watch that happen in real time yeah some of the most uh powerful people I've met a single mom raised them oh man and she was a go-getter and she wouldn't be denied yeah and uh yeah if the kids take that work ethic and then they go become a surgeon or something and there's no stop it sets up the Next Generation you're setting up the Next Generation so spend the next year deciding that and getting ready sorry you're facing this kiddo this is the Ramsey Show [Music] hey folks you know that sinking feeling when you make an offer on a house you love and then you hear there's another offer you need the Churchill Mortgage home buyer Edge super fast pre-approval and a secured interest rate plus a five thousand dollar seller guarantee gives your offer the best chance of being accepted the home buyer Edge from Churchill gives you an advantage over those other guys go to churchillmortgage.com today to learn more [Music] Dr John deloney Ramsey personality is my co-host today open phones at triple eight eight two five five two two five foreign two years of broadcasting experience and go with my gut on something here I want to continue that conversation um from that last caller yeah the uh Because the actual data is and those of you that are old like me you don't realize this data but more people now live together than are married okay statistic I mean the actual human beings are more more shacking up cohabitating whatever you want to call it than are married and what people don't grasp is the data it's been going on it's been going on since the you know the The Love Shack of the 70s and from then on you know here we go and uh so what people don't realize is the um unintended consequences legally financially uh relationally that builds up in these situations there's books of research on this now on the actual results and in the financial Arena as an example we'll start with that one the there is a thing called the marriage advantage you've seen this data and the marriage Advantage says that married people live longer I think that's because your wife drives you crazy to go get a physical but I don't know exactly what it is but married people live longer and their net worth is significant and their net worth is significantly larger and their incomes and their career trajectory is significantly higher statistically so that's not like a Dave opinion so you little farts on Tic Tac can just go run off the cliff all right but the the it with your little comments but the facts are the data says that your net worth your longevity and your uh uh uh career track and income all are improved with marriage it's called the the research piece the buckets of research are called the marriage advantage in general there's a whole volume also if you live together prior to getting married you are statistically four times more likely to get a divorce later I hadn't heard it being that high wow that's wild you know and so you get and there's all kinds of other things that come in with the cohabitating Pro or I'm going to try on these shoes to make sure they fit before we buy them you know kind of a thing right and so um there's all kinds of data that shows the disadvantages to that there's all kinds of data that shows a disadvantages to short engagements you get you know you meet someone this weekend and by next weekend you're married statistically you're very unlikely for that marriage to last as compared to someone who has a six-month engagement period average not a two year or a six year but a six-month engagement period average after the dating process has begun because it takes a little while to figure out is this a person I want to spend the rest of my life with duh met them at a bar on Saturday married on Monday that's Las Vegas that's not smart okay and so um it just does it can it can it work does it work occasionally sure sure there's always statistical anomalies but I'm talking about if you're if you're 16 or you have a 16 year old what would you tell them the best way for them to have their most prosperous quality life is have four or five Long Island Iced Teas put all your money on red and find somebody to marry before the weekend's over right no one would say that no would say that right no grandmother ever told her her granddaughter that right good grief no yeah um just saddle up at the daiquiri bar and see how this works if you marry somebody with a daiquiri bar I'm just gonna go ahead and say that study's probably not been done that ain't gonna last Ain't Gonna Last that's a John deloney study yes all right but here's the other I don't know that this study's been done and I don't know that it needs to be that last caller said something that's important in this it's this illusion of freedom and singleness I'm gonna live with somebody for two years five years seven years I'm gonna have kids with them but I'm not gonna get married because I want to keep that Shard right at the door one foot out the door and what you forget is he or she can't fully anchor into you those kids can't fully anchor into this unit um because it's not fully a unit yet because you got one foot out of the boat you only Row in one hit one armed right yeah it's so hard it's impossible and it's put her in a position almost as if she was in a domestic violence situation she'd not I don't think but um but but she's trapped and that's the the abuser uses the trapped oh you how you're going to live you ain't gain money you know so they're trapped so they stay in the punching bag scenario because that's the only way the kids get to eat but also guess what the kids get to watch this and so they think that's how it's done and this is a problem yeah it's a serious problem so just telling you I mean what would you tell your seven-year-old daughter right your your 17 year old daughter your 17 year old son what is a man look like in these situations well you know a a reasonable length of Engagement um not living together prior to marriage and then getting married you have the oh by the way if you graduate from college you know you heard this thing 50 of the marriages fail you heard that one yeah it's absolutely not true that's right absolutely not true they don't okay if you make more than fifty thousand dollars a year household income both of you graduate from college and both of your parents are still married you have a 90 chance of your marriage lasting that's the stats that's the real stats okay so this then some of these are you can't control whether your parents are still together but you can control graduating from school you can control accomplishing goals you can control delaying pleasure called maturity you can control these things these are controllables that you can use to set the table for your life and then you get to see what the results are what the what the fruit is out of that and so you know so you know none of my children prior to marriage live together none of them it wasn't because Dad's a big old meaning no it's because autonomous stuff Tom you have a distinct advantage if you will have a reasonable length of Engagement graduate from school make a reasonable income marry someone that is of the same religious preference that you are learn to set boundaries with extended family if you do all of these things it's and agree on kids how many to have and whether let them live all these kinds of things right and that was a joke and um sort of you know the the um but I mean when you have these things lined up ahead of time your probability of having a a marriage that lasts is very high I mean sure and I'm getting ready to celebrate 41 years and there have been times we almost killed each other but you fell back on that Covenant well and we fell back on this value system that set us up to win I mean it's just ridiculous I always like to flip the coin and ask myself what is it what has happened in this many years and for people to opt out and I I do want to put some of the ownership on those of us who are married with kids if you make marriage appear to be miserable and you scream and you fight and you it's abusive and somebody's always leaving or coming or going what kid in their right mind would look and go I want to opt into that and so I feel an extra responsibility to model for my kids here's what love looks like here's what coming back together after disagreement uh here's what the repairs they call it here's that looks like here's what's saying I'm sorry looks like here's what's asking for forgiveness looks like I want to model this is the best way to to create a world going forward and if you didn't have that and you're entering into marriage you need to get some people in your life that you see do have 40 years 50 years ahead of you and they can give you some wisdom along the way but there's something about man this doesn't have to be the old ball and chain as the old songs go this could be the greatest thing that ever happened to you if you opt into it and you live into it that way well and all the data that I'm just saying indicates that right is it perfect no no that hillbilly woman I about killed each other a couple times I mean you know I'm just saying it's not perfect I've always set fire to my marriage yeah multiples but that doesn't mean that we weren't dialed in and going right what do I want when I'm old really old I'm old now but I mean really what do I want then that's real you know that's real older than me that's really up this is the Ramsay show foreign [Music] [Music] [Music] here I'm a huge fan of both meditation and prayer and good mental health includes slowing down gaining control of your thoughts and plugging into something bigger than you and Halo makes it easy to start a daily practice of meditation prayer and finding peace hallow is the number one Bible app in the world and you can tailor content towards your faith tradition from scripture readings and prayers to meditation and journaling Hollow makes it easy to practice prayer meditate and build a deeper more meaningful spiritual life and ReDiscover true peace go to hollow.com Ramsay today to get three months of hallow for free that's hollow.com Ramsay foreign [Music] thank you for joining us America we're glad you're here hey we have folks who tune in to every single episode of the Ramsey Show they know all the answers but they're still stressed and stuck because knowing what you do with your money isn't the problem doing it is the answer personal finance is 80 Behavior it's only 20 head knowledge and The Proven way to change your behavior is by taking Financial Peace University 10 million people have this class is the difference between trying to get in shape on your own versus hiring a personal trainer you'll have a coordinator who loves you enough to hold you accountable and encourage you they're superheroes and the other people in the class will be cheering you on this is why this class has worked for so many millions of people after nine weeks you will never handle money the same way again I can get that information for free off of YouTube you can get it before we put it on YouTube it was called common sense but you weren't doing it then either so when you go through the class it's actually boot camp you're actually going to do it it's no longer it's game on game on baby break the huddle let's play join a join a Financial Peace University class at ramsaysolutions.com FPU ramseysolutions.com FPU Dr John deloney Ramsey personality is my co-host today Ann is in Albuquerque New Mexico hi Anne welcome to the Ramsay show thanks for having me sure what's up I have a question um so I background I make 110 a year I've paid off thirty six thousand dollars in the last 18 months um it's been hard since I've done it way to go yeah yeah um but my goal was to to be done by October of this coming year and I owe 17 000 on my car I have 17 000 in an air conditioner loan and 14 000 in a student loan um and I really want those student loans gone before they kick back in I've been chipping away at it but I really just want it done so I have an offer on my car um for 33 000 and that would get me out of my my car loan and that would get me out of the student loans and it would just leave me with the air conditioners um but it would also leave me with no car I do have a teenager that has a car that we could carpool and we could you know get through the next few months I could save up some cash and get a beater um I don't know I I think I probably just need to do this I think I just need you to tell me to do it oh because of where your head space is I really like where you are and you've because you have a proven track record of winning already thirty six thousand paid off out of 110. you're amazing you're amazing and you what you have decided let me say it a different way out loud is you've decided I want to be out of debt more than I want this car yeah that's a fair trade yeah I would make that trade because you've also realized you can get another car when you have no debt and you make 110 000 you can save up and get a nice car pretty quick right yeah absolutely the one thing I would do different in your plan than what you've said is I would pay the car off I would pay whatever I could on those student loans but I would say five thousand bucks to go get me my own car yeah yeah I wouldn't carpool the teenager you all need to love each other a little bit longer yeah yeah adjusted too we talked about it this morning and they were like well they don't really get a vote they're a teenager teenagers don't get a vote this is just this is grown up to grown up but I I I'd probably buy me a car that I can get around with oh I'm okay with that too you know three to five k um and and you know because you do make 110 and you're gonna be done all we're doing here is accelerating the inevitable you're gonna get out of debt yeah all we're doing is doing it faster and then the loop is the loopback is you're going to go get another car 24 months from now there's 20 grand and you're going to pay cash for it yeah then yeah you will because I mean you'll have no debt and you'll have your emergency phone in place and you would upgrade out of a 5 000 car making 110. what's your hang up yeah I would do it I would do it and I appreciate your teenagers emotional um uh support but it's not necessary because you already are a warrior princess you are already getting it done and um and when it involves them sacrificing they're never going to vote for that so that's okay okay okay if this if this one more one more little push towards making this call your kids are going to watch their mom go all in yep and my mom look I remember when I was a teenager what my mom did when your daughter is or your son is a grandparent they're going to be sitting on the back porch yeah back when I was a kid my mama sold off everything I thought she's gonna sell me my God she got out of debt and it changed everything you'll be telling that story or your kid's going to be one year into grad school and thinking about quitting and you're gonna say go all in and he's gonna have a picture of what that actually looks like right yeah you're amazing it's pretty awesome you're amazing well done very very well done get them and should I 3000 came from a dealership yes absolutely yes you should get more than one quote we need to maximize this asset okay yeah I get more than one quote and consider taking an extra month to do it and selling it private sale what kind of car is it it's a Toyota Tacoma it'll sell anyone it'll sell fast you may want to sell it private you look on Kelly Blue Book um and that's a hot truck okay real hot truck yeah that truck will sell it's a good truck too um and the uh but anyway I I would um now look on Kelly Blue Book and see what private sale is if it's 10 grand more wait a month and sell it for eight grand more to an individual are you okay hey let me ask you go ahead I'm gonna jump in because I hear there's somebody's face that's in your mind that's going to make fun of this decision isn't there I think that I just feel no no no no you're not telling the truth you're not there's isn't there answer my question yeah yeah okay what I want you to do right now I want you to stick your tongue out at them yeah because they don't get a vote in your prosperity in your peace in your sleep you're amazing go with you I vote with you not them get them girl get them and Tacoma people are a special I mean that's a gang that's a capacity the tacos we had tacos in our family now my friend Winston drove one for 10 years Daniel drove one for 10 years you're opting out of that club to go to sleep well at night yeah all right awesome today's question of the day is brought to you by neighborly your hub for Home Services as the weather warms up neighborly can help you find local service pros like the ground Skies the five-star painting and mosquito Joe to turn your outdoor space into your favorite space find the help you need these are great folks neighborly.com today's question comes from Shelly in Virginia Shelly writes my son has a six-month emergency fund and enough to save for a 25 down payment he's been pre-approved for a mortgage but it's asking me why an arm is a bad choice not the body part but the adjustable rate mortgage simple answer I'm assuming this is a huge No-No I'd love to know why simple answer it stands for adjustable rate mortgage where have interest rates been going lately up what do we want to adjust up for in a rising interest rate environment that's dumber than a rock you might have an argument in a falling interest rate environment and then I'd have to teach you a 20-minute class on why arms suck but but in addition to that just straight up in a rising interest rate environment you should never even have to ask this question where you know because I think rates are going to go down then refinance but you do not want the uh the arms came on the scene because Banks got caught in an escalating interest rate environment with a bunch of low interest rate mortgages in their portfolio that's called disintermediation when Banks don't like making not making money they don't like this intermediation when their portfolio is upside down compared to the marketplace and so they invented this thing where their portfolio adjusts when rates go up it's good for them and you pay for it don't do an adjustable rate mortgage ever ever under any circumstances you have to do an arm you can't afford a house this is the Ramsey Show [Music] foreign [Music] Ramsey personality is my co-host today thanks for being with us Kelly is in Oakland California hi Kelly welcome to the Ramsey Show hi Dave thank you so much for having me sure what's up um okay so my husband is a guarantor on his mom's mortgage um it's not under his name uh Jessica guarantor we did a Cash out refinance of her house prior to her creating a living trust for um some Home Improvement projects with the verbal expectation that she would put the title in my husband's name upon her passing however without me knowing she threw in an additional Clause that if we ever sell the house we would be required to pay half of the profits to his eldest son who is currently 20 years old even though we have two additional babies under two years old um this Clause was thrown in after the loan was approved we've already thrown a hundred thousand dollars of our own money cash into the house the house is worth as of right now conservatively 1.25 million and the current loan balance is a little under 400 000. so my question is now that we are out of um baby step two and mom and dad answered um Mom is unfortunately going through a lot of Health situations and is she mentally competent yes she is okay your husband her son needs to walk into her room with fresh papers and have this fixed she was in that was unethical not fair and dumb and she needs to fix it and she can do that with a signature if your husband will make his mother do that okay what happens if she doesn't because we don't know yeah we don't know what to do if I want her to sign it to a way to a charity I don't want anything else to do with it I want it sold and given away to a charity I do not want to wreck a 20 year old irresponsible person's life because you know what an irresponsible person with 400 000 is really freaking irresponsible right dumb grandmother dumb dumb dumb grandmother right bad grandmother bad grandmother bad bad bad bad bad bad do you have any insight as to why she did this um so she she wanted to make sure that um her grandsons would be taking care of when she's gone yeah it's an act of love and she was dumb really your husband allowed this I'm angry with him too because his mother has told him what to do way too many times he's way too grown up for this mommy said and then Mommy did and he didn't say anything about it because Mommy Mother Dearest nope nope nope nope nope nope nope and you're mad at her and you need to be mad at him it's easier to be mad at her because she doesn't live in the house with you but yeah but he's he's the one that allowed this to go on and while he put his name on the loan I mean that's just unethical on her part and on his part very weak to allow this to go down does she not trust your husband no she just had a fit of stupidity and put it on paper I'm telling you it's not I don't think it's deep stuff here well I I think there is a little bit of untrust before we got married he was very bad with money and since then we've turned everything around with all the babies that got out of the bus giving it to a 20 year old fixes that yeah what are you gonna do there's a lot of control issues mom has um that's spoken like somebody who really loves her husband but man you're more mom than you are a wife he needs let's Saddle Up saddle up he needs to March right in there and say Mom this was wrong I went along with it I shouldn't have and I'm not going along with it so here's what's going to happen you die I'm going to sue the trust and ask the judge to undo your stupidity if you don't undo it with his signature right now because giving a 20 year old four hundred thousand dollars is absolutely that's irresponsible with money is absolutely asinine because it's going to cause more problems than blessings yeah okay it's not a blessing what is a cocaine person what does a cocaine addict do when they get more money more cocaine what's in irresponsible to a person do when they get more money more irresponsible what's a generous person do when they get more money more generous money magnifies our good and bad parts that all of us have me included and uh you know what does Dave get more things with loud mufflers you know I mean what you know the redneck I mean you know what but I mean everybody's got right that so so let's let's back it out let's say Grandma did this perfectly and there's only one kid is the right thing to do is to put it in an in a trust yeah that has yeah multiple multi-year payouts on it yeah yeah and different different triggering mechanisms that indicate responsibility like you know if he's going to college I would graduate college if you're going to go to college you need to graduate college that's a triggering event you need to uh be 25 and not be deeply in debt you know and a triggering event you know and so some level of maturity I'm not saying all 20 year olds are doofuses she said her 20 year old was irresponsible the mother just said that okay so I'm that's what I'm going off of so well he's been had a ringside seat to his dad by the way I've been a response when I was 20 you ain't giving me 400 Grand that'd been a bad idea it would have been the worst idea I've been a lot of loud mufflers and beer involved yeah yeah it's just a bad idea no I'm not saying that everybody but but and there there we've had 20 year olds on this show that were more responsible and had their crap together more than a lot of 60 year olds so you can't can't it's not an age thing but whatever you are good or bad is is going to be magnified and when you're gifting or doing inheritance you need to structure it to ensure that you're being a blessing and not magnifying stupidity and let's go one step up the river here a mother that would do this to her son last minute dishonestly behind closed doors without telling them has done this crap for years she's a controller and if you are married to somebody like this you've got to speak up if you're married to a coward who won't speak up against his own mom or her own mom her own dad or his own dad and say we as a family are not getting into this deal and let me tell you this is not a coward in the sense of lack of Courage this is I don't want to put up with the crap yes this is going to unleash when I bother to have a conflict with her because all conflicts with her don't end well he just doesn't want to screw with it I mean that's a different kind of cowardice I don't because I know it's you know when I walk into the forest with the bear I'm gonna meet a bear I mean he knows what he's got he's dealt with it his whole life so it's not cowardice like he's a little wuss that's not the point he's like it ain't worth a fight screw it that's where he is but it is worth the fight we spent a hundred thousand dollars it was on money and 400 going to an irresponsible 20 year old it's worth the fight it's worth the fight it's worth calling her out and oh by the way you signed the note so that's what I mean doing business you know some point you got to go it is worth the fight but this is a this when we say coward we're not like sniveling yellow-bellied in the corner sucking your thumb coward this is just I don't want to deal with the pain in the butt that is mom when you confront her but the other side of that is it's your job to protect your kid exactly and yourself and your family yeah so that's your job you know so this whole thing comes at you you go you know what I'm not signing that night I'm not going to do that we're not gonna do that yeah you want to do the deal we're doing it my way yeah we'll do it my way or or not at all it's okay and I also understand hey there's a million dollar house we're gonna have this much money that's not worth losing my family over not we're burning everything down I hold dad gum and Dave you spoke with for with such Insight that it's almost as though you've seen this before 30 years of doing this yes yeah yeah a couple times parents and grandparents who try to bless their their lineage and they bless you know the worst one I ever had early on on this show I took a call from a grandfather who was sobbing and he was he was uh 89 years old and he had co-signed for a 30 000 pickup for his grandson and it got repoed and they were coming after his farm because he had no money but he had a farm oh no and they were going to take the 89 year old's farm for the repossession on the pickup and nobody in the family he thought he was helping his grandson by co-signing and I'll never forget that 89 year old crying on the air this is the Ramsay show [Music] hey it's John deloney co-host of the Ramsey show did you know over 18 million NP show every week a lot of those people listed on one of our 600 plus radio stations across the country to find a station near you go to ramseysolutions.com show [Music] [Music] live from the headquarters of Ramsey Solutions broadcasting from the PODS moving and storage Studios it's the Ramsey show where we help people filled well do work that they love and create actual amazing relationships open phones around here at triple eight eight two five five two two five my co-host today Dr John deloney of Dr John deloney show a podcast on Ramsey networks that is unbelievably fabulously popular and of course number one best-selling book of own your past change your future he deals with the mental health space and the relationship space and uh so always a fun one-two punch when he and I get to serve together on these microphones open phones at triple eight eight two five five two two five Naomi is in Green Bay Wisconsin hey Naomi what's up hi um first I just want to say thank you so much so much that I've been listening to you a lot over the past couple months I guess I'm a new new listener and um it's just so obvious and apparent that everybody there genuinely cares about the people you're dealing with and really tries to help and I just find that so inspiring and encouraging in today's society so thank you that's the best compliment I've had today thank you very much I appreciate that that's true and thank you for noticing that how can we help you um so I'm calling because I have a question about how to deal with or manage ongoing medical expenses it's not one lump sum it's not one thing um my son is sick he's been sick for 10 years and um over the course of the 10 years you know there's been some ups and downs but you could say that the medical expenses have you know probably averaged about 20 percent of our income and um yeah and my husband is uh he's a pastor so there hasn't always been a whole lot of income you know to go around to pay things so um we don't have a lot of debt in fact we we only own our house I don't know how we could afford to do what we do if we had anything like a car payment or anything how old is your baby well now he's 16. he he was six what's the nature of his illness chronic lyme disease um 15 of people who get Lyme disease it doesn't go away with the 30-day treatment of antibiotics and he actually got it when he was three and a half which made it more severe he didn't get the normal kind of treatment that adults would get like a strong enough antibiotic so he's got some neurological things going on yeah and he he's been up and down like he actually was doing a lot better and then he got covered he I mean he got covered two years ago and that put everything way back set him back to debilitating headaches in the treatment protocol that we found that had been working for four or five years suddenly wasn't and it's like a whole new amount of medical expenses and things trying to get him back to where he can you know at least function even houses energy level today energy um he he he's better he actually with the covid he started getting like debilitating migraines yeah that was three years that was three years ago how is he today Lord was like how old is he today how is he today he's he not as good as he was 2020 but he's better than a 2022 so I guess he's in the middle okay so here's what the reason I'm asking you all these things is number one to check on him but number two what you've you're calling about is how to budget for this and of course it's impossible to predict exactly but we can say based on what we know of the history the covet episode and the improvements since covid based on that not emotions but what does logic tell you factually that you think is a reasonable forecast for the coming three or four years that you're going to be paying medical expenses and I assume you've got a health insurance as well so you know what out of pocket do you need to budget for a reasonable person that would project what you guys have been facing because it is a chronic thing you're dealing with it's ongoing and the only question is how bad it is going forward not how bad it has been but how bad it is going forward now I know you and I can't project we're not God but you can tell me based on his prognosis today take your mommy uh heart which is wonderful and set it aside for a second just look at it from your brain and say based on where he is today where do you really think you're going to spend in the next 12 months and 24 months and 36 months and then just put that in the budget monthly if you think it's going to be ten thousand dollars put eight hundred dollars a month in the budget out of pocket I'm talking about if you think it's going to be three thousand dollars put 250 a month in the budget and so uh you know anytime you're dealing with something chronic you just I've got a friend that has Crohn's disease and he's you know he's got a just a it's a constant thing it's a chronic issue and he's constantly writing checks he's constantly making his deductible he's constantly making his co-pays right because it's just he just fights with health it's just it's sad it's awful it's hard on him he's tough as nails but man and but that's the thing you gotta you just gotta you gotta go okay quantify it because you're asking me about the budget so we got to quantify it so six thousand dollars a year 500 bucks a month I'm just gonna put it in the month like I got a car payment and I'm just gonna put it on there set it aside I don't need it this month don't need it next month but I'm gonna need it sometime during this 12. it's probably going to happen and so I got to get ready and we're just you know and uh it's uh here's what's weird when you do that math and you lay it all out it will calm you down about his health hello okay yes yes I'm here um so so if the amount I put in the budget which I would say would I don't know maybe like sixteen hundred dollars a month but then that just makes our budget tend to not work are you really gonna spend 1600 a month yeah that's twenty thousand dollars a year absolutely twenty thousand dollars a year out of pocket out of pocket well it was more than that last year I didn't ask about last year I asked about next year 18 or 16 000 out of pocket next year Okay then if that's if that's what you're really going to spend then you really need to put that in your budget and here's a hard conversation that you're all gonna have to have um I had somebody call into my show this morning and we have a very similar conversation him and his wife adopted they had a beautiful two-year-old daughter and then his wife passed away and he was set up to be a high powered accountant and he had to change his career trajectory and take a totally different kind of role because that his life changed and maybe your husband has wanted to be a pastor he's in it but reality financially is sitting before him saying you can't continue to make this much money in this kind of job and take care of your sick child and that's a hard conversation it's a conversation that no one none of us want to have especially when we feel like we've got a calling but man we've got to look at our kids and the way I would phrase this is we have to choose reality we got to own reality that sits before us there's a financial reality and a purpose reality all those things are real if you can't afford it you got to find something figure out something else and without you guys facing what that Mom's facing is very real very real very scary we got a guy named Chris at work here yeah and he's out on he's on disability so ouch this is the Ramsey Show [Music] hey guys being free to make your own medical decisions is a big deal these days Christian Healthcare Ministries gives members the freedom to choose the doctors and providers they want without the frustration of worrying about networks and with no waiting period to join it's a membership-based non-profit Ministry where hundreds of thousands of Christians share funds to pay for and pray for each other's medical bills for over 40 years chm has helped families living across all 50 states so cfchm could be right for your family check out more today at chministries.org budget [Music] thank you foreign [Applause] [Music] [Applause] hey guys if you're wondering whether to buy or sell a home this year here's what you need to know about the housing market there's still more demand for homes than there are homes to buy there's still a shortage median home price is expected to keep Rising just at a slower rate than the crazy time back in covet but I mean it's still going up and interest rates hadn't stopped going up so what's this mean it means if you're buying a home you may still face competition to big price tags and if you wait you're going to face more competition more price tags so if you want to sell your home good time to sell it but of course it's going to sell slower than the crazy times when you got 89 offers in one weekend those days are gone and they should be gone they were not healthy so it's good life is good to buy a home to sell a home Now's the Time go to ramseysolutions.com to find an agent that we recommend ramseysolutions.com agent they're Ramsay trusted these are top performing agents around the country who our team has vetted and trusts to serve you well they did not get their license last week and they've not sold only two homes and they're not your uncle well probably because you know you don't pick your agent by him being your uncle or a friend at church who just got her license and she's so sweet no that's just dumb don't do that you're about to lose money on your house don't do that Jessica is with us in Philadelphia hi Jessica how are you hi Dave I'm doing great and freaking out a little bit because I made it on air with you how about you ah I'm freaking out because I made it on air with you what's up Jessica he is freaked out trust me trust me this is Dave freaked out so uh my question is we sold our home last year when you know prices were ridiculous and we have a good amount of money to put into um a 529 and Esa for our children but I don't want to trigger a gift tax I'm pretty sure that has nothing to do with the gift tax okay because um you can double check your tax guy because I'm not a thousand percent sure but I've never heard of somebody who hit it getting hit with a gift tax putting money into a 529 to start with you'd have to put in more than whatever the limit is a sheer twelve thousand fifteen thousand bucks whatever it is but um I can't even remember cheat sheet here but anyway yeah so uh uh well that's what I was running in 16 000. no 16 000. if you're going over sixteen thousand you'd have a gift tax this year but the uh uh but um yeah I but I'm pretty sure this has nothing to do with gift tax I'm pretty sure if you're putting it into the college fund that doesn't apply to this pretty sure if you put it in your minor children's name it doesn't apply to this but um but I'm not positive so you could double check your Tax Advisor if you're working with a smart investor Pro to open the 529 or if you have a 529 with them they certainly could answer the question uh they would know off the top of their head but I've never heard of somebody being gift tax doing that so I doubt I'm pretty sure it's exempt from that so but again double check because my tax I'm always quick to say when I'm not positive and I'm not positive on that one Tim's in Cedar Rapids Iowa hi Tim welcome to the Ramsey Show for you thanks for taking my call sure what's up um so I'm 39 I'm completely debt free good um yeah well I guess I shouldn't say that we own a we own a downtown building that we owe 38 000 on um we are gonna be hey I'm John Maloney and I'm six feet tall except I'm five eight no I I know I forgot to say that um I have 160 000 saved up cash um and we're looking at probably going to be building a house next year cool um we own where we at far right now so we're probably going to tear down the existing home and build um on our place um I want to take and pay off the building right now um is that is that something you would the wife doesn't really want me to what but if she doesn't think it's gonna she doesn't how'd she put it she doesn't think she doesn't see the problem of making the monthly payment on it or the 200 or whatever that we owe on yeah okay we can just turn that over to the house yeah if it's not a problem then it won't be a problem when it's paid off either correct it's your her point was it's irrelevant so it's irrelevant pay it off um it's not irrelevant because you're going to be have a different switch that flips inside of you when you have absolutely zero debt now what's your household income oh I'd say probably right at 100. okay so what are you gonna how much you're gonna spend on the building project well right now we're looking at maybe 160 000 180 000 house that's why she doesn't want you to pay off the building because you're going to turn around with 120 000 how you're gonna have the money to build the house you want interactive because I mean we still got to keep twenty thousand in our emergency fund yeah well you got 160 you said but if we pay off a forty thousand dollar thirty eight thousand dollar mortgage we can leave me 120 and you're wanting to build 160 so where you're gonna get the other 40. that's why she doesn't want to do it correct yeah that's it so instead of having a mortgage on our house she would rather you have a mortgage on the building and I'm probably agreeing with that what's the house oh you're you're tearing down a prop you own the land already and you're living on the land now correct okay where are y'all gonna live when you tear the house down um we're either gonna have to rent a place or possibly a radio have a camper we can live in um yeah all right so budget the house carefully because 160 000 even in Cedar Rapids is certainly not the uh it's not a mansion no no it's it's just an easy well let me tell you you can blink and this will be 260. right yeah I know so you need to lay out a game plan in detail and start drawing a plan and figuring out your you know your actual materials cost your actual contractor cost what are you really going to do um I'm building a home right now and uh me and the Builder have uh had a lot of discussions for three months before we broke ground and we have three pieces of paper we met last night and we managed to these three pieces of paper the schedule the budget and the blueprint and we have to stay on track on all three the schedule the blueprint bow is all planned on paper before three months before we broke ground we ordered ordered the windows and the appliances of two months before we broke ground because of supply chain they'll be sitting in the warehouse early so we're not going to slow down we're going to be on time we're going to be on budget and we're going to stick to the freaking plan and if you don't do that you're a nightmare for your Builder and you're going to blow your budget up and you're going to be four years building a pretzel you follow me so if you if you guys will do all that planning and laying out then you may figure out we're not going to bill for a little while we're going to save money for a little bit more that could be a possibility too yeah it could be I don't care what you do you may you may choose to bill for 120 and pay off the building I don't care you can do you can do any of these you want to do but here's what you're right now you have a vague statement of what we want to build a house and that's the end of your information you don't have any more information other than you want to put it on that lot where that house is you got now that you're going to tear down but you really need I I want you looking at blueprints I want you talking to the Builder I want you to get budgets and Supply you know what's your Lumber package you're gonna run you know how long is this going to take because if it's going to take two years if it's going to be three years from now before you need to write the last check well you can afford to save up a lot making a hundred I also want you guys to sit down and create a five to ten year plan for your family because you really want to get this building paid off she doesn't want to have a mortgage on this new house y'all planning on building and she wants a new house and she wants a new house in some ways are kicking some of this down the road sit down and let's come up and you have a game plan for your house have a game plan for your marriage have a game plan for your finances over the next five to ten years yeah and just and just follow the plan out we're at the end of the story we're living in the house she wants paid for and the building's paid for there you go and now what number of months out there is that five 60 months is it 64 months and you can lay that out it's it's sixth grade math Dave I had a buddy in college that was connected to the building industry and one of the a builder told him something important once he said I can always tell the difference between the millionaires who are buying a house and the middle class guys with the big loan because the millionaires come in with the ads from The Appliance Store it said we agreed on this one and the middle class guy with the big loan says I don't know man what do you think and he said there was that attention to detail gonna do it like this that preserves that um that millionaire status over time I told my Builder I'm gonna pay him a little extra because I'm about to drive him and my wife crazy I'm a project manager from hell I mean it's just detail man it's detail this is the Ramsay show [Music] if you're like most people your home is your most valuable asset and when you want to make improvements it can feel like everything costs too much or takes too long but something as simple as custom window coverings from blinds.com can completely change your space and add value to your home we've recommended blinds.com for over a decade so you know you can trust them from blinds drapes and shutters to motorized Shades they make it easy and affordable to upgrade your entire home and their team is ready to help with everything from design consultation to measuring and installation plus there are never any misleading quotes or hidden fees ever guarantee and shipping is always free see why blinds.com is the number one online retailer of custom window coverings go to blinds.com now and save 40 off selected products visit blinds.com today for more info [Music] [Music] Dr John deloney Ramsey personality is my co-host today thanks for being with us America open phone's a triple eight eight two five five two two five thanks for being here hey based on our rankings we're in the top 10 podcasts in the entire world top 15 podcasts in the entire world uh and that has gone up recently uh based on our ratings on radio uh based on our Spotify and our Apple numbers and our YouTube numbers there's a whole bunch of you that are new thank you we're honored to have you in our audience uh we will love you and we will tell you the truth and sometimes that will make you mad just be prepared because we love you and we will tell you the truth that's what we do and if you want to help us we're not going to spend 300 million on marketing like a sofa we're not buying a uh like a football stadium or something allergies are bad this time of year and um but the uh if you want to help us you can subscribe follow the show whatever it is whichever way you do it click the Subscribe button click the follow button click the share button and send it on send it on yeah send it on to them and uh good stuff let people know about leave us a five star review mama said if you hang anything nice to say don't say anything at all so five stars work thank you very much we're glad you're here we appreciate you being with us Williams in San Antonio Texas Remember the Alamo what's up William oh good afternoon uh Dave I uh had a rather unfortunate Financial incident in in our marriage happened last fall my wife uh got victimized in an internet fraud and not only lost a sizable amount of cash but also took out some loans to help these people and uh some of those were short-term credit card things like buying gift cards and then there were two installment loans one was for twenty three thousand five hundred one was for 17 500. the rest of them the smaller credit cards and such I'm using the snowball method to take care of those but I need advice on the installment loans when it comes to this uh fraud it's usually one of two things usually it's some sort of romantic interest or it's some sort of somebody crying out for help with medical assistance or some sort of Injustice what is it in your in your in your situation oh it would it would be the former uh my wife and I have been having been having some uh problems been together for 25 years and uh things just kind of uh I don't know they happened and I didn't didn't see the warning signs how's your marriage now but it's it's much better I've been I've been getting therapy and she has been too and we've been making some inroads and just uh basic stuff like how we speak to each other and I'm proud of you man it's hard try try it well here's the thing I I have a bunch of people tell me well I would I would divorce somebody that would do that and I I'm not going to throw away 25 years okay I I said I would make a full year as a concerted effort to get this thing turned around financially and emotionally and part of the emotional thing is me I realized I needed to do some some work uh and so we're both doing therapy and it seems to be benefiting well you're you're a beacon of light for men who are find themselves in in emotional situations without the right tools in the toolkit and you can do one of two things you can just take up your toolkit and go home or you can you can storm the gates of hell and try to find more tools and that's what you're doing man I'm proud of you I'm proud of you amen thank you it's awesome what's your household income sir so 69 000 okay um does she work outside the home no we're we're both in our mid 70s no we're both retired oh boy so there there's money there to take care of the short-term stuff the the I mean you mean money you have a nest egg uh we we still have some resources a 401k and I have some I have some money in my account all the debts are in her name what is the uh how much money is in your account forty five thousand dollars how much money is in your 401k Blues slightly I'm not counting these two installment loans how much miscellaneous is there the little credit card mosquitoes yeah I'm gonna say nine ten thousand all right um I've got an income tax refund check coming in the 2000's gonna get knocked off for that and I would write a check out I would write a check out of yours today and pay off all the credit cards that leaves the 40 and close all the accounts okay now that is a gesture on your part towards the healing that you're searching for the 40 is still sitting there we'll come back to that in a minute then I want to meet with her and her therapist and your therapist and however y'all are doing this marriage stuff and uh somehow you've got to get some checks and balances and start to incrementally rebuild trust that you're not throwing good money after bad this doesn't happen again because in the back of your mind you're if I clean this out and this happens again I ain't got anywhere to go that's what's happening in the back of your mind so you've got to know that this is solid going forward before you write any more big checks but nine thousand but nine thousand dollars in the scope of your life you would pay that right now for healing and I would yeah yeah let's let's get rid of all the mosquitoes get it down to the 17 5 and 20. three five and then let's just sit there with those two while we work on this relationship and as your trust reaches closer to 100 percent and that is going to require some demonstrations as well as on her part and your part and healing and some time to rebuild and as that is rebuilt and you approach 100 on that then I'm gonna start trying to figure out a way to get those paid off but right now I want to clear the the white noise the Clutter out of my mind with all these little bills that because every time you write a check on this it picks the scab it opens the wound and I'm trying to get it down to right in just two checks it's very perceptive you're right yeah I mean I get pissed off all all over again every time you do this and you have to go through the whole process you've been doing in therapy start forgiveness again you start have to go back through the whole thing and you just you start having all these conversations between your ears we all do this that's how I know I I wouldn't be guilty of it no not me but yeah but I mean yeah you write checks for things you're that remind you of bad things it's bad so Dave at what point does and again in service of choosing reality disowning this is where we find ourselves do two people in their 70s have to commit to going back to work for a year and earn another forty thousand dollars to pay these debts if she's of good health I mean I would talk to her therapist about this I'm not going to intervene in that but if she's of good health um so it's like both of them she's trying to re-earn trust and um you know I'm 12 stepping here but uh you know make them make good make amends yeah I think she goes back to work yeah and starts working on these other two loans I I think that's not because of financial but just I think that's a representative movement towards owning this it will give a place for that energy too you know you know make amends it is a 12-step thing and so you got to go back and where you can correct the wrongs it's part of being repentant or sorry you know and nobody wants to work in their 70s and that's where we find ourselves right and nobody wants to get scammed to buy a romance on the internet that's where we find ourselves this is the Ramsay show [Applause] [Music] [Music] [Music] [Music] thank you [Music] Dr John deloney Ramsey personality is my co-host today thank you for joining us America open phones at triple eight eight two five five two two five Brian is with us in Austin Texas hey Brian welcome to the Ramsay show hey Dave honored to talk to you Sarah and grateful for your ministry and my wife and I are recently we've discovered you guys and the baby steps and um we're beginning to think we're doing everything a little backwards and now we've learned about your stuff so specifically we have three debt items so we have two car notes and then a mortgage those three items uh no credit card debt cars are 55 and 20 uh so about 75 total however we built up some savings and Investments um just in index funds uh it's like 180 around there and then we have more on that and retirement so my question is we want to send our kids just because just concerns about you know School curriculum all that stuff we want to send them to Christian private school and what our question is is how do we pay for that like should we I was thinking of just tapping in and drawing from our investments and paying that roughly 10 grand a year but then my wife had a good idea we're listening to you and so we're like man or do we just pay the car notes off first what's your household income uh 94 actually well my wife's gonna be working part-time so uh in the fall so um it'll be about 100 105 somewhere where did the 180 come from uh I used to before my job now I used to be in a higher income earning job why aren't you now uh because I'm in vocational full-time Ministry now oh okay okay yeah that's fine I'm just curious okay so yeah because the numbers just didn't they didn't that didn't add up okay and um that's good um what's the score cost it's 10 grand a year per kid um well it'll be for both of them okay okay so 10 grand out of 105 is a budget item and you write a check pay off the cars but I'm not sure a fifty five thousand dollar car fits in the 105 000 income matter of fact I'm sure it doesn't re even if it's paid for even if it's paid for what in the world is that oh the car Mama's SUV no no this is Dad's truck he's in Austin uh no well almost there's a Tesla that's really good I gave up my my uh older car and finally you're a hipster Pastor man yeah so that's cool um yeah here's the thing we so what would I do if I woke up in your shoes and why why is important because I want you to think for yourself not do stuff and you wouldn't do stuff just because Dave said Brian but um so what we've discovered mathematically is it's very difficult to get ahead when a large portion of your asset base versus your income is depreciating going down in value like a rock and um so all cars with wheels and or Motors go anything with wheels and or Motors goes down in value period now so when you have too many things with wheels and Motors that go down in value versus your income and this did fit in your old life yeah because you were probably making 200 or more and so uh you know 55 000 our car is not a problem but where what the numbers that we've crunched over 30 years of doing this say that if you've got more than half of your annual income tied up in things going the wrong way you're going to struggle so I would challenge whether to keep the Tesla or not you need to pray about that think about it I'm not going to tell you what to do but you've got too much tied up in things going the wrong way versus your income that's what I'm observing now so at a minimum I'd rather check and pay them off today The Next Step I would consider is stepping out that Tesla and moving into a more reasonable vehicle for somebody that makes a hundred thousand a year okay yeah that's fair that makes sense and I think you can handle a ten thousand dollar budget out of 105 if you watch your p's and q's and just send your kids to school as a budget item yeah yeah okay and I'm guessing they're going to school where you're pastoring yeah well it's it's similar philosophy different place but yeah it's real similar yeah okay something where you know the uh the curriculum and the output and so forth you're not you're not having to wonder what kind of garbage they're getting fed right yeah exactly things are getting a little crazy so it made us rethink everything yeah I heard the rumor yeah a little yeah a lot okay so yeah I'm with you I'm with you on that part and I and the ratio for private school is a good ratio you got a great deal 10 grand for two of them that's that's amazingly cheap you know in today's world so all of that the the biggest thing that doesn't fit in this math picture is that Tesla just to pick on it again and so you can do what you want uh if I woke up in your shoes I would be driving a twenty thousand dollar car not a fifty five thousand dollar car and um and my wife would be driving her twenty thousand dollar car and we'd have a little more money in the bank and we'd be budget idming these kids so you're right on track and thank you for your service and thank you for your hard choice to serve to serve in the ministry that's that's a real call to take an income cut in half or more and to do that that's pretty cool yeah that's real cool open phones at triple eight eight two five five two two five Ryan is in Phoenix hey Ryan what's up hi Dave I'm a big fan and I just finished reading Dr Malone's book um I got a question about my home so uh we have a condo uh we currently owe 208 000 but we're still paying a PMI of 180 a month good god um we also to get under the PMI they say it'll be twenty four thousand seven hundred and eleven dollars um I have cash on hand of actually 33 000. so I could pay that off but I also have 92 000 in student loans so I didn't know if I should take that cash on hand and apply it directly to student loans or pay off the PMI what's your household uh well so I just recently lost my job but it I'm I'm applying right now once I get my job back our household income should be anywhere from 140 to 150. okay and how long have you been working on uh this debt situation only a month um I graduated in May and a week later I lost my job so during that time I went through Financial Peace University with my wife we got on board with the budget but we're like okay it's really hard to set a budget because because I'm unemployed yeah okay yeah so all right so remember in Financial Peace University when we talked about we get rid of all debt except the house and baby step two and the PMI didn't change that PMI pisses me off I'm with you it's bad yeah but and I want you to get that other 24 on there as fast as you can but I want your student loans gone because they're getting ready to come back at you guys with these student loans they're going to return that Fellowship back on yeah I haven't had a payment so it felt like nothing but yeah okay now you do but I mean it's getting it's gonna it's gonna wake you back up man in the fall and then when it comes becomes very apparent that the Biden Administration is not able to forgive student loans so um yeah I mean the Supreme Court has ruled and it's you know I'm sorry but so uh sorry but not sorry so the 33 000 you remember baby step one's a thousand dollars everything else goes towards the debt and so 32 goes on the 92 so now we have 60 left and we're going to attack the 60 with a Vengeance and when it's gone we're gonna build an emergency fund and when it's gone we're going to start putting 15 of our income into retirement and kids college and start paying down on the house and that's when you'll get rid of the PMI perfect thank you so much okay thank you thank you for being a customer in Financial Peace Welcome to our crazy gang Dave I think what you said is real important man if you have not been paying in on student loans and no one has by the way statistics for three years one percent have been paying if you haven't they are coming back in September like a forest fire they're coming make a plan that might mean you've got to cancel a vacation that might mean you gotta sell something that might mean whatever listen you think inflation sucks white or your student loans kicked back in and you didn't think about it and they catch you off guard you've got a four-month Runway to solve this slam your face in the bricks guys so get make a plan don't don't don't don't act like this isn't coming it's coming [Music] red here and get rid of your student loans people this is the Ramsay show [Music] hey it's Dr John deloney if you love the show and want a deeper dive on your money Journey we have a Weekly Newsletter that gives you trending and helpful articles and tips on following the Ramsay way just go to ramseysolutions.com today to sign up for our newsletter again that's ramsesolutions.com to sign up for our Weekly Newsletter [Music] [Music] live from the headquarters of Ramsey Solutions broadcasting from the PODS moving and storage Studios it's the Ramsay show where we help people build wealth do work that they love and create actual amazing relationships open phones here Dr John deloney Ramsey personality is my co-host it's a free call at triple eight eight two five five two two five Clayton is with us in San Diego to start off this hour hi Clayton welcome to the Ramsey Show sure what's up question today is is it a smart decision to accept my parents help to pay off my debt um to give a little backstory I'm 27 years old making 85 000 a year I currently have thirty thousand dollars of debt 25 of that is in credit cards and five of that is a card note um I just recently had to put in ten thousand dollars of repairs in my car um and my parents are offering to help pay for half of that um and I just recently kind of stumbled onto your guys's show and uh binge watched it on YouTube and I have uh heard that that might not be the best idea going forward uh so just wondering how to figure out how to uh whether your mom and dad are offering you five thousand dollars in assistance as you start walking out of debt yes what strings are attached they're a great support for you know any bills or anything like that for probably 10 years now um and you're 27 so since you were 17 . since I was about 8 19 yeah um I moved out around then and started working so why now uh I think my my parents just know how stressed I was for uh you know I was working on getting out of debt and then um I was I was tripping away at it and then having a ten thousand dollar issue um this car has been I've had it for about five years and I've put about twenty thousand dollars into it so they know that it's been an absolute headache for me so I think that they're uh you must be the worst at purchasing car repairs in the world you spent thirty thousand dollars literally you're not exaggerating repairing a car twenty twenty thousand twenty thousand oh including this ten uh this this is yes what in the world did you rebuild the whole car I mean I've had I've had an air conditioning I've had like a multiple sensor issues and then this recent one was a hybrid battery replacement that was about ninety seven hundred dollars yeah oh you're driving a battery yes yes no it's a it's an Audi it's an Audi but it's an electric vehicle yeah but it's an electric vehicle yes sir oh that e-tron I know you're telling me no you told us and we're we're not laughing at you it's with you but it's kind of at you yeah yeah couch so something is stirring in your soul my guess is you you went in a rabbit hole watched all these videos of the Ramsay show you're looking at your financial position you make 85 Grand as a 27 year old which is which is means you're crushing it and you can't breathe and the more you listen to this show the more your heart's beating a little bit faster and a little bit faster a little bit faster is that fair that is absolutely fair and then your uh control all delete doesn't work on your rolling girder or whatever you got in your car there and now you're in a mess so the the car is the car been fixed now already been fixed has been fixed um so I I did use this is before I I realized this was an absolute No-No but I did use debt to um pay for the repairs on the car um so I put it on a credit card which that adds into the 25 000. um yeah what is this what's the Toyota battery worth the car I mean what's it worth uh no I thought it was it was an Audi Audi Audi I'm sorry yeah it's about uh 13 and a half so um we're getting about 13 000. I have it on you know the different sites okay for about 14. so what is bothering you about your parents offering you no strings attached they have a good relationship with you you've been living on your own not with any help at all there's no pattern of subsidy what's bothering you about five thousand dollars worth of help chances that do make it a smart decision um or you know or okay to do yeah where there's where there's not a pattern of you being a parasite it's okay yeah okay this is just a gift it's like a wildly generous Christmas gift but or where there's a pattern of mom and dad now get to help you make all your decisions because they are going to invade your life because they're control freaks because they put some money and we wouldn't we wouldn't do that one I didn't hear either one of those things here or it becomes an entitlement you expect this forever you've been you've been managing on your own you've made some mistakes but welcome to life you're not doing horribly you're just not doing great and you have this battery blow up and they want to give you 5K I take it they have the money uh they do they're not you know they're not rolling but they're but they do all right for themselves borrow the money to give you 5K no no they wouldn't all right um well I wouldn't want to tell I would tell you to not engage in a pattern for your sake for your dignity this is not a pattern it's a one-off it's an anomaly so if eight months from now they won't do it again no no I think we you know we're just this helps you turn the corner on this new adventure you're on to become debt free but they've not been supporting you you've been supporting yourself for seven eight nine years and uh and they're not control freaks I haven't heard a single thing now is are you going to tell me something in just a minute that I haven't heard yet no no there's nothing hidden or anything like that okay I think it was just maybe like a A prizing or not hey that's a good kind of Pride to ask the question so uh but you know uh uh my kids do fabulously they make really good money they stand on their own they've done great on their wealth building and you know as part of my estate planning I may just dump some money over there but it has nothing to do with them uh you know it has nothing I'm not doing that but I mean it could but I'm just saying it has nothing to do with me controlling them it has nothing to do with them being needy in a parasite living in their mother's basement playing video games that's not what we're doing you're a stand-up citizen making 85k in San Diego California you're not rich but you have a plan and now you've got a new nuanced plan that gives you some traction I'm proud of you let this be the fire that engages this system so that the next time and it would there will be a next time yeah when a car falls apart on you that that you don't have to call mom and dad that you've paid off this debt you're staying on your own two feet I don't even think you called them they called you yeah it was yeah I was just kind of you know you were you were whining about it and they said hey we'll help exactly yeah yeah that's that's fair so he you know maybe passive aggressive calling yeah I mean he didn't he didn't call and beg for money yeah so that's that's cool Clayton I like you I think you're a good guy I think you're heading the right way man yeah except the gift and and make this be a let this be a never again moment yeah I'm gonna give you another gift so accept this one we want to put you through Financial Peace University and accelerate this process so Mom and Dad will throw a little gas on your fire we'll throw some on your fire we want you to go through the program the whole nine weeks if you'll promise to go through it we'll give it to you free hang on Austin will pick up [Music] [Applause] [Music] thank you [Applause] [Music] [Applause] [Music] hey Dr John deloney here I'm a huge fan of both meditation and prayer and good mental health includes slowing down gaining control of your thoughts and plugging into something bigger than you and Halo makes it easy to start a daily practice of meditation prayer and finding peace hallow is the number one Bible app in the world and you can tailor content towards your faith tradition from scripture readings and prayers to meditation and journaling hallow makes it easy to practice prayer meditate and build a deeper more meaningful spiritual life and ReDiscover true peace go to hollow.com Ramsay today to get three months of hallow for free that's hallow.com Ramsay [Music] Dr John deloney Ramsey personality is my co-host today our team's been doing research on Mental Health in the workplace it's not looking good out there guys employees say the last month they felt stressed burned out overwhelmed even angry at work and if you're a business or HR leader you may be seeing this firsthand your employees can be distracted exhausted maybe even quit or ready to quit here's the deal good leaders take their employees well-being seriously and because it's good for both you or employees and your business when they're well they can bring their full selves to work and you can help them do that this is employee well-being month and that includes Financial Wellness our major companies across U.S like U-Haul and Costco and many others are teaching our curriculum to their employees it's called smart dollar when it's done by the HR team and lots of companies furnish our our stuff to show people how to become wealthy get out of debt get the money piece straightened out that lower stress big time go to ramseysolutions.com employee well-built being to check out some free resources ramsaysolutions employee well-being Jared is in Salt Lake City hey Jared welcome to the Ramsay show how can we help yeah hi hi John hi Dave how are you doing today great man what's up good hey so I have a bit of an odd question so about a year ago I was diagnosed with uh brain cancer um you don't don't feel too bad for me I you know I've still got my hair I'm up and walking but the diagnosis comes with about a 10 to 15 year time Horizon for uh for death I'm 32 I have two kids and a wife um we're in steps four five and six as far as the baby steps are concerned and really my question is just so I intend to beat this diagnosis however I do want to live with the brutal facts and and just want to know if there's anything I should change or adjust about the plan that we have laid out to take into account that I made uh you know evaporate from from being the financial provider for my family in a decade man how long ago was the diagnosis about a year about a year ago man you process this uh and you know the tone of your voice and the way you present the story just is incredible courage you sound so strong I mean it's I'm I'm about to cry but you sound so strong Jared have you gone robot mode no no so when I first got this diagnosis it was a lemon-sized tumor in my brain and they told me I had six months to live um I was lucky that my tumor is about as weird as I am uh and because of that uh they found out no you don't have six months the the structure of the genes and this tumor mean that you've got about 10 to 15 years not six months and so I sat in in that first diagnosis for about a month before they got the testing back and that gives you a lot of time to kind of process yeah and then you know yeah so you got like a 10-year gift is the way you've been looking at it yeah exactly wow exactly good for you man hold your kids I've got a three-year-old and a one one-year-old he was actually born uh the same month as my uh my surgery my craniotomy wow okay and so let me go back now that I'm breathing again what was your question exactly how can you best prepare you're in baby steps four five and six and how can you best prepare okay yeah so we're we're anticipating I'm gonna live for a really long time but I have also been given the blessing of knowing that that might not be the case and how do I change my plan to uh to adopt that knowledge yeah in a nine and a half year bonus plan I don't yeah roughly yeah so possibly probably okay um ah the way I answer questions here is what would I do if I woke up in your shoes I can't imagine because I've never been there the first thing uh I have done years ago and I would do over and over every morning and I have done ever over and every morning is just make sure I'm spiritually in order that yeah I've got my spiritual house in order and and that's inside of me and it's between me and God and um in my case I'm a Jesus follower and so that becomes a huge huge deal in these scenarios now once I've got that going then for me then the second thing I'm going to be worried about is relationships and make sure I'm not like John said in robot mode or in freak out mode or in I'm not doing more damage um then uh you know uh then good you know with this diagnosis and so um you know it's the um uh yeah and the third thing I'm going to do is go write a bull named Foo menu I mean I'm gonna do a bunch of stuff right and so uh uh which I do I've always done that I jumped out of an airplane made John deloney do it with me last year so um you know you might as well you know and why not and uh and then the fourth thing I'm gonna do is a question you're asking so is the financial and I've already done all of that now also so I can speak that what I would do is what I've done a detailed will and I'm gonna write letters to go with that will for weddings and for births of grandchildren that I might not be there for and I'm going to have a lot of discussions with everybody that's around uh as to exactly how I want this financial thing to go down and it's all going to be written out in a detailed will exactly how I want the money handled for the good of my family right and by the way that's what I have I have a ridiculously complicated and detailed estate plan but that's one way I say I love you to my family and that's what you're asking so I want you to make sure that that's done and if you spend a little money on that it gives her peace of mind it gives you peace of mind one less thing to think about as we deal with really important things and money's not on that list right so right then as far as the rest of it goes is I'm going to live like I'm going to live and so I'm going to keep working four five and six simple you know keep working four five and six get you know keep putting money away for retirement she can use that if you don't make it you can use it if you do make it um I'll put keep putting money away baby step five for kids college they gonna need that uh maybe step six I'm gonna get the house paid off the closer I get it paid off the better off I'm gonna be if I stay and better off she's gonna be if I don't and so on right and so you know you get you get real tactical and real detail but these this plan works uh whether you whether you're here 10 years or whether you're here 40 years so it's the best one I got and I would just keep working it exactly that way you may have a different level of intensity and you may have a different level going to enjoyment uh uh enjoying some moments here and there of money that other people might not uh but none of that's bad that that's all part of the ride and and the thing that you're on um John what am I missing I think just making it tactile so when Dave talks about relationships I want you to get two or three men that will commit to having coffee or breakfast or whatever for you with you for the next 10 years like y'all gonna be my gang and those are gonna be the guys that you text and those random nights that you can't sleep and you're spinning at 3am and those are the guys they're gonna show up and make sure if you if you know if you have a bad day they're gonna be those guys that show up but you're going to want to spend every spare second doing these things that you quote-unquote think you need to do and one of the things that's going to be a great gift to your kids is seeing their old man have friends seeing their dad have friends seeing their dad have commitments um because let's play this out let's say worst case scenario you got 10 years then you got a 13 year old an 11 year old who got a ringside seat of watching dad be courageous be brave and have friends and invite men over into his life right so that's relationships making sure you and your wife are together and this comes from Renee Brown I just think the way she says it is so is so poignant be weary of dress rehearsing tragedy you think you can plan for the back end of this and you really oh the emotional back into this you can't you can't right and so you can't rehearse her but you can prepare by laying foundations that's right so what Dave said about financial about relationship all that is exactly right and then go live your best life with those kids uh man hey Jared go live it before we go into this commercial promise me that you or your wife one will call us back and let us know how you're doing now I want to keep I want to keep up with you and I want to know your story and I want to know if we can help her and or you yeah yeah I'll let you know and and I'll I'll tell you Dave um God's kind of been sitting on my heart with this whole thing and I want to let your your audience know we we got a life insurance policy about a month before we got the diagnosis before any there we go evidence or knowledge that there was anything going on you know I felt fine but on my heart I thought hey I need to get this set up so so it's it's you know that much as well uh that that's one big serious man Wow way to go way to go [Music] well you've all played the telephone game the first person Whispers a message to the second person who Whispers it to the third and so on around the table until the original message has completely changed multiply that confusion by a hundred if you run a business with different software systems that don't talk to each other that's why there's netsuite by Oracle in the early days of Ramsay we were using different systems for all of our business units we needed one single source for accurate data netsuite was the software we used to optimize and take us to the next level netsuite gave us the visibility into all of our numbers so that we could communicate across departments and plan ahead better and as we grew it scaled with us next week worked for Ramsey and it will make a difference for your business too join the more than 34 000 customers who trust netsuite to help make them smarter and make better decisions and level up their operations to learn more get a free product tour at netsuite.com Ramsay that's netsuite.com Ramsay foreign [Music] thank you for joining us America Dr John deloney Ramsey personality is my co-host today Kenny's in Portland Maine hi Kenny how are you I'm doing well uh Dave and John a quick question for you baby step two should I cancel or stop contributing to my HSA yes okay the reason is is that you have a thousand dollar emergency fund you've already have money in the HSA how much do you have in there now well I keep it minimal I just I keep spending it as soon as I get it just to keep to keep paying on the bit on oh okay if you're using it back out for medical bills we'll use it as a method for paying them and let the government pay a third of your medical bills because it's tax deductible money going in and then you pay the medical bill with it if you can do that yeah we'll cycle it through there but as far as building up a big chunk of savings in an HSA while you're working baby step two I would not no I usually dwindle it right down as soon as soon as I get money in it so I can just get a bit of back well about the one to lay down you're paying bills you would have paid otherwise with tax deductible money so that's that's going to be smart by 30 cents on the dollar 25 cents on the dollar okay so my next question to you is if I'm putting 200 a paycheck period to get my medical bills paid off faster should I increase that contribution are the medical bills in the baby where you are in the debt snowball yes so they're they're at the top of the debt snowball right now yeah they're one of the top ones yeah the truck as much as you can put in there and run it back through that account because it's just a method of paying so in other words if you put a thousand dollars in there you do not pay taxes on that one thousand dollars and you use that tax free money to pay your medical bill with that saves you about 250 bucks per thousand okay in taxes so you because you're running it through there but all we're doing is using this as a method of clearing the debt snowball okay not as a method of building up savings awesome I appreciate your time so well done good good move excellent excellent I'll tell you another place that applies folks out there is um if you've got a chronic situation um where there's a ongoing allergies there's ongoing Crohn's diseases there's ongoing whatever where you've got these constant medical bills that are part of your budget then run those through your HSA if you've got an HSA because you can pay medical bills out of HSA tax-free and so you know you are going to dump money in there but if you're just using your HSA like I have George W put this in place back in the day and um that's when it came into being was under the George W Bush Administration I started putting as much money as was allowed into an HSA at that point knock on wood the Ramsey family's been pretty healthy and we pretty much can we have cash flowed any medical that was out of pocket so I've never touched my HSA and it's now in mutual funds and it's hundreds of thousands of dollars because I've been doing it for decades now so it's became another investment vehicle is where it amounted to but I don't suggest that kind of thing while you're in baby step two baby step two is Bill Pay time we're paying bills we're clearing debt all that kind of junk John's in Ventura California hi John how are you uh honored to speak to you and your listeners thank you how are you guys better than we deserve sir how can we help yeah so it's been quite a year last August I got married to the love of my life and a week after we came back from the honeymoon my dad fell in his in his assisted living home and broke his hip and that led to a series of declining health events for him and then he passed away a month later I'm sorry yeah he spent 25 years in assisted living after suffering a stroke when I was 13. and his sister my aunt was his conservator she did an amazing job with the conservatorship and the Guardianship and when my grandpa was alive he had set up a medical needs trust for my dad and that trust grew to 175 thousand dollars um this trust was never used it was supposed to be our medical needs trust for any additional things my dad needed and my aunt formed me on the beneficiary of the entire trust so fast forward my wife and I got a check for 150 000 this week and we're getting the other 25s maybe in about a month when she finishes up the final accounting just some of the little um you know things with clothes up the conservatorship so my question to you guys you know at this stage for my wife and I are baby step three B and four would you use all of this as a down payment or should we set some of this aside for our investments we're just we're a little lost as to what to do with this amount of money yeah so this comes through as an estate as an inherited item it's not taxable correct have you looked into that my accountant told me and my dad was my dad fornia and my accountant said that it's an inherited trust it was a third party trust my grandpa has it's not it's not it's not no matter which state he's in because it's not a state issue it's a federal issue so I I don't think you're taxed at all I think I agree with your accountant but your accountant's probably smarter than I am on this subject so uh I'll go with him so no taxes have to be withheld so you're going to clear 175. wow what a story yeah and you're thinking about buying a house how much of a house we're going to buy in Ventura California well we're actually more like outside of La um my wife and I have about a hundred thousand already saved up in cash we got 275 how much are you going to spend on a house you know for our first property 600 to 700 like a condo or something because homes are like 8.50 and that'll put us over the 15-year fixed that you recommend what's your household income 20 000. yeah yeah well I'm gonna make sure I have an emergency fund in place and no debt do you already have that not counting this yeah we're totally debt free you have an emergency fund inside about 30k okay all right now I'm putting the whole thing down on the house 100 wow 275 yeah and let's reverse Engineers so that you understand how quickly I can make that decision after doing this all these years number one I've answered the question two thousand times but um number two uh if you had a condo that was worth 600 and you owed uh 300 on it would you go borrow another hundred to put it into Investments no for sure not it's the same thing by not putting that hundred down and instead putting it into Investments if you didn't put the whole thing down and you put some of it into Investments it has the same net effect as if you borrowed on the condo because you effectually are you're borrowing more on the condo so you're borrowing money on your condo to put it into Investments and I wouldn't do that that's silly so no no no we're gonna get the condo down and then we're gonna get it paid off and you got a great household income and man what a Year y'all have been through ups and downs and crazy up yeah up we get married down dad Falls dad passes away up we get 175 man lots of roller coaster so John I'm gonna ask Dave a question on that I have about your situation but don't ask his expertise okay sure so Dave there's something in my guts that would want to sit down and at least put something on the table make some sort of gift or a something of appreciation to my aunt who's done such an amazing job is that was she paid yes um she was and um yes but she you're right I mean she did an amazing job and my parents were actually divorcing when my dad had the stroke and as a result it led to a lot of years of I just didn't get to know my aunt very well I had a great relationship with my dad um and now I've been getting to know my aunt and it's been awesome we've come together through this and I've been able to get to know her she's not my wife if she was paid very very well then I would buy a nice token gift if she wasn't paid very very well I would write a nice check I'm with John I like that I really like that idea that's just a relationship thing that's just a me doing something that makes me like me right or it's one of those moments like Dave and I take so many calls on this exact situation that goes horribly awry and there's cousins fighting cousins suing each other and you had one gangster sister aunt who said not on my watch and because of her diligence and a grandpa and Grandpa that's right Dad well yeah I mean Dad says everybody all the players in this are positive on your day this never happens in our world man this is so amazing um but I I I I would feel in my spirit I want to do something nice and that that could that could be a thousand bucks like who knows what that is there's not a number on that she wants to go on a nice cruise and it's 5K write a check something like that I'd do that for sure I'm with John that's a good thought John man that's special good for you brother yeah that's it's it's unusual and so it's super special yeah it's good people doing good things and taking care of their family wow this is the Ramsay show [Music] [Music] thank you [Music] our scripture today Proverbs 15 16 better is a little with the fear of the Lord than great treasure and trouble with it Dr Jordan Peterson says perhaps you are overvaluing what you don't have and undervaluing what you do well perhaps contentment is a good thing I agree with a good doctor Perhaps Perhaps open phones at triple eight eight two five five two two five Ashley is with us Ashley is in St Louis hi Ashley welcome to the Ramsey Show hey Dave thank you for taking my call I feel so so blessed and I'm sure I'm making my stepdad jealous right now he's obsessed with you well we're honored how can we help well Dave I've gotten myself in a pickle and I need to figure out if I should trade in my car and basically get a junker tell us more sounds ominous I shouldn't it is kind of what you do what kind of car did you over buy I do Richard uh yeah um I shouldn't have done it but back in November I traded in my Honda Accord and I got a Subaru ascent and that means what you got rid of the car you got rid of a car that was worth what and you bought a car that you owe how much on yeah yeah that I had was I only owe 7 500 on and I traded it in for a car to owe 22 000. German as you roll that 75 on top of that no say yeah no she had equity in it the uh I guess you you owed the car was worth more than 7 500 that you traded right yes okay and so what do you make a year I make about 42 000. okay well twenty two thousand dollar car doesn't fit that does it no it sure doesn't so what are you gonna do well I've been contemplating the idea of trading in for something much less the problem is reliability versus Honey a 7 500 Accord will go to the moon and back solo Corolla and a Camry you had a really reliable car I did I mean that's a Jesus card and a car and they were all in one Accord I mean yeah I mean seriously yes I messed up right but it happens hey why are you still beating yourself up so much well you shouldn't got rid of the car yet so we gotta we got to keep beating ourselves up till we get rid of the car so and the car is real nice huh yeah that Subaru is nice yeah yeah well it didn't bring you as much joy as it brought you pain how has it been a pain well honestly yeah uh the transmission went out within the first two weeks of owning it well that was under warranty I hope it was covered under a recall yeah yeah so that was lucky so it was a pain but it didn't cost so what's wrong with selling it and getting a 7 500 Civic or wrong cord I am just having a really hard time finding anything reliable it's you drove a 7 500 car that was reliable this is mythology yep you can find a 7 500 you can undo this and you'll lose some money but get back to close to where you were and have a reliable car that I'm telling you a ten thousand dollar a seventy five hundred dollar Accord it that cars they'll drive 500 000 miles I mean they you can't kill them yeah it's just finding that again is my issue right now because I really yeah well it would require looking oh I've been looking I'm obsessed no you're not well is there not a car that carvana won't just drop off at your front door well the carvana ones you can't seem to really find a deal on there we go see you're going to have an excuse for anything we put on the table so actually you do whatever you want to do kiddo if I woke up in your shoes I would say last November my brain wasn't functioning and today my brain is functioning and I'm going to undo the stupid that I did and go back to the last time that my life made sense and restart and both Dave and I have had that exact conversation with ourselves multiple times probably this week but yeah it's hard to be in the garage only Monday but yeah been there twice yeah and so it's just you you have to go back to the last time things made sense so the psalmist says the Earth or the psalmist says the blessings of the Lord have no sorrow added to them so as a person of faith I can tell you God did not give you that car and the way I know that is there was sorrow added to it ding ding exit the devil car get the Jesus card oh jeez there you go Reddit there's some fodder well it was a joke you're going to be trying to tell you I can tell you that sometimes as a person of Faith you think you're doing what you're supposed to be doing what God's telling you to do and you find out later it was last night's Pizza not the Holy Spirit and you look back and you go the blessings of the Lord have no sorrow added to them and a sorrow added to this so apparently I missed that one I can't I mean like how many bazillion times in 62 years I've done that a bunch but I can go right back to the last time there was peace and go I'm going back to the Accord it's then it's like it's like when you're playing a video game and you die and you go back to the start of the other level just go back there start there except you don't have to die I mean the part of her that thought this was a good idea that probably needs to be done and then she can go back [Music] actually you got the worst possible series of answers on this call of anybody in the last 20 years on the show sell the car we got the Devil Car the death in the video game all of it's lumped into one bad call so I'm just saying this is this Kyle get us the Lord out of this call how can we help Colin San Diego right quick before we run out of time oh awesome Dave thank you so much for taking my call I'm a huge fan of you as a leader in finance and a spiritual leader as well so you're very kind before we run out of time what's your question yeah so I live in San Diego and um I have a two-year-old daughter and my wife we live in a very small uh thousand square foot condo here in San Diego and uh we bought it about six years ago um and we bought it for like 250 it's currently valued at like 5 30. what's your question Kyle well my question is should we leave California with my wife being pregnant and we have another baby on the way we're considering if we should we we need a bigger your motivation for leaving is what well to get it more more inexpensive housing you live in a very expensive area and you want a better you want a less expensive housing market yeah but why would you this is where it gets complicated is when I tell my wife hey we need to move we have 300 000 equity and frankly we can come up with another 50 Grand and just buy a house 350 cash somewhere else yeah my wife says well my family is here I love my family and I can't leave them and her family actually said well if you guys stay here we'll give you guys 75 to 100 000 to help you buy a house the problem is problems here cost nine hundred thousand dollars so even with a hundred thousand dollars cash on top of our 300 Equity hey brother just completely price Kyle this is not a a house question yet this is a marriage question this is about a guy who's looking at a house as an investment vehicle and a wife who wants to create a home or under family and that this is a conversation to be solved over breakfast first take your father-in-law to breakfast and get them to move with you yeah this isn't a math problem just yet this is a young married couple trying to see which is the best path and she has a different vision of what this looks like you have a different picture of what this looks like and you only need to align those pictures man personal finance is personal in the sense that it affects your family and so where you live in conjunction with your wife and her family does matter that's a valid part of the equation now how to make that affordable in San Diego that's hard math right there that's tough hey thank you for calling I wish we had a magic answer for you but we don't that puts us out of the Ramsey Show in the books we'll be back with you before you know it in the meantime remember there's ultimately only one way to financial peace and that's to walk daily with the Prince of Peace Christ Jesus [Music] hey it's Dr John deloney if you like what you heard in this episode and want to know more about getting started on the Ramsay baby steps go to ramseysolutions.com and click on the get started button we'll help you figure out the best next step for you based on your specific situation that's ramsesolutions.com and click get started [Music]

Channel: The Ramsey Show

Views: 88,111

Keywords: dave ramsay live, dave ramsey, dave ramsey channel, dave ramsey live, dave ramsey live show, dave ramsey live stream, dave ramsey podcast, dave ramsey radio show, dave ramsey show, dave ramsey show full show, dave ramsey show live, ramsey, ramsey solutions, the dave ramsey show, the dave ramsey show live, the ramsey show full episodes, the ramsey show

Id: Q4cL8ZidVlk

Length: 124min 15sec (7455 seconds)

Published: Mon Jun 12 2023