Why Surrender Is Actually So Difficult

so if you've been in the catholic world and you know catholic lingo there's been something that has been told to me since the beginning of time well at least my life just surrender it to god just give it all to him what does that mean like [Music] my name is mary pablo and this is ascension presents so we see this and we hear this all the time so on one side we have this like just give it all to jesus mindset and then on the other side we have this other mindset have it all together oh you're three what do you want to be when you grow up i'm three a three-year-old shouldn't have to be worrying about what they're gonna do when they're older okay like where's the balance between the two so i give it all to jesus or do i have my five-year plan my 10-year plan figure out when i'm gonna get married have kids and do everything right now this has been something of surrendering to the lord for being honest has always been an issue for me a struggle let's say let's say a struggle for me so i grew up catholic but i had a reversion um in college when i was serving at a summer missionary at a catholic camp i wasn't fully there like i was not jesus did not have my whole heart he had only parts you know that part of the bible that it was like luke if your lukewarm will spit you out i was the lukewarm person just waiting to be spewed out thankfully things changed there after going to confession having an argument with the priest long story another day i remember being in adoration and in front of the eucharist it was like this activity that you had to go up and kneel in front of the lord and say god like i give you everything everyone go and they were all a lot of people were crying around me i went up to jesus and i looked at him and i looked at the lord in the eucharist and even though i had my doubts i always knew that was him and instead of saying like good luck god like take all of everything i started making a list of all the reasons why i didn't have to give him everything like lord me and you are good i love you you love me we're a great big family i'm not i'm not killing anyone i'm not doing drugs like we're we're good and the priest behind me looked at me and he said the words that forever changed my life and he said stop fighting and surrender and those are the words that forever changed my life um and then i became the person crying and i mean changed my whole life around like literally my career my school broke up with my boyfriend changed my friends everything and i wish i could say that it was like and then everything was great no you know how we're talking about the power of words that's saying stop fighting and surrender is constantly in my mind i constantly have to tell myself these words over and over and over again on a daily basis because i want to be in control i want to figure things out i have my plan i want to know what's going on and i'm not super organized you should check my room out but i want to know what's happening and god really put this to the test especially this past year like all of us i really wanted to travel and i had my dream trip planned the holy land okay like jesus is from there to walk where jesus walked that's amazing but for me it was double special so for those of you who do not know i'm dominican from the dominican republic but i'm also arabic and my grandfather was raised in bethlehem you know where jesus was born so for me it was going to be the super epic trip jesus and my family like going to the land of both and then i was over there so i was gonna you know go to egypt see the pyramids go to greece go to dubai why not go to russia and then you know on the way home stop in fatima see our lady and it was going to be this epic trip and i was so excited then the whole world was put on pause and everything was cut and instead of all the travels and all the conferences and all the things i had planned i found myself in my room sitting doing [Music] nothing which was horrible and also great in the stillness and in the stopping i was reminded of something a very important lesson that i often times forget and need to remember and that is that i control nothing and it's funny because i always say that prayer i literally before filming this i said god i am nothing and you are everything and i repeat it so many times and i say it out loud because i need to be constantly reminding myself that i am nothing and you are everything lord and i need to give you control and so yes i'm gonna make plans but at the end of the day if it's not a part of what you want god i don't want it so why is this so difficult um one pride because i want to figure things out on my own um two detachment is really hard to be able to like say lord no like it's okay it's okay if i don't things don't go the way i want even saying that tastes a little bit like vinegar in my mouth not in a good way but it's great to be able to recognize okay this is something i want to work on and i need to be able to give this to you um something that i love about people the religious life that they take vows of poverty chastity and obedience and the obedience one has always been someone that i'm like oh that sounds so rough but the way they describe it it's like yes but you're making the choice to willingly give control to god and in that surrender there's freedom and that's exactly what i'm striving for notice how i started striving because i'm still working progress to be able to say god here's my heart do with it as you will and in that decision daily decision and we'll explain that in a second that we we can also in crown of freedom so when there are moments that things go haywire because there are moments i actually learned that about myself recently um the smallest little things go wrong and i've kind of lost it my student wore like to forgot his t-shirt for a retreat and in my mind i was like it's over like the retreat thirty is just done like how is the tree gonna function because you forgot your shirt and it sounds silly but in the moment i i feel like it's it's it's my retreat like i i have to plan it and it has to be done in a certain certain way and if something goes off it's just a t-shirt's not gonna ruin god's plans like that's ridiculous but i have to talk myself out of that and that's a problem and so something that i i've actually found extremely helpful um is rua as you can see i look greek words and so rua means breath and it's the breath of the holy spirit and one of my favorite prayers is very simple and it's just three words and it's come holy spirit and so i'll take a minute and when i'm super stressed and filled with anxiety and freaking out and it's like lord how can i give you everything like and i feel like the entire weight of the world is on me even though it says in matthew 11 29 like come to me all who are weary and heavy late and i will give you rest like it's so hard because i feel like i have to be the one carrying it i take a minute and i just take a breath and when i breathe in i say come holy spirit and so i'll just just breathe in and when i breathe out all of my stress all of my anxieties my worries i literally picture myself giving them to the lord and i have found that so helpful and such a beautiful reminder that god will meet me there and he will meet you there if you simply invite him in practical ways to do this the more you have a relationship with god the better you will trust him and the more you will want to like give him control it's kind of like in any relationship of a marriage or relationship of a family trust builds upon relationship and if you don't have a relationship you're not going to trust him with anything and so the more that you pray and the more you build that bond the more you can say okay god like i know that you're god and you're not gonna let me down and so i i choose to winningly willingly god's a gentleman he doesn't barge in to willingly give you control something that i've done um and i actually started doing it again recently in preparation for this video um it's every single day the first thing i do is i kneel down and i say okay god i give you my day everything that i do and say maybe for your glory every action every encounter that i do may i be an instrument so that you may be working through me and in me and that that small little step every morning makes the world of a difference in so many powerful ways the last thing that i want to mention um i've noticed throughout the years that it's important to recognize what gifts you have and so if you don't know this i invite you to take time to figure to pray with that one of the gifts that i've been given and i know for sure it's a gift is the gift of joy and trust me it definitely comes from the lord and was something in that i think sometimes people can mistaken my joyfulness um for like childishness we're called to have childlike faith i mean jesus literally says to be like the children and what does that mean a child just trusts that god's gonna their father is gonna supply my nephew is not freaking out about what they're gonna feed him he knows we're gonna feed him we're gonna feed him well that's right he just knows that he's gonna be taken care of and so in this the more that i can be like a child the more that i can have a child like faith and say god like i'm gonna do my part but at the end of the day you're my father and you're gonna supply my needs and you're gonna give me all the things that i need because you're a good and faithful father who loves his children and you're not gonna let me down and in that childlike faith and trusting that god is god and that we're the children and that we're not god so we shouldn't have it all figured out there's a beautiful deep surrender so prepare take out your resumes do what you got to do but at the end of the day know that he's the one that needs to be in control what is it in your life that you need to give god control over is it obviously i think all of us need our hearts right but are there certain relationships that we're clinging to that we don't want to surrender is it our future that we're freaking out about is it where we're gonna study is it are certain sins or attachments that we just don't want to relinquish what is it that you need to surrender what's holding you back from giving god your all and maybe that's fear what the lord is saying right now like do not be afraid for he is with you so let's pray name of the father and the son of the holy spirit amen god is asking you may send your holy spirit upon us right now all that i am and all that i have i give you glory and we ask lord that this very moment that you may come upon us and bring to light what it is that we need to surrender to you and we're going to say this through the words of saint ignatius of loyola take lord and receive all my liberty my memory my understanding my entire will all i have and call my own you have given all to me to you lord i return it everything is yours do with it as you will give me only your love and your grace that is enough for me amen the father and the son of the holy spirit amen so every single day wake up and give it to him and that's all we gotta do that's simple or not complicated you get what i'm saying try it have a great day bye you

Channel: Ascension Presents

Views: 36,535

Rating: 4.9813199 out of 5

Keywords: mari pablo, ascension, ascension press, ascension presents, surrender, offer it up, give it to god, jesus take the wheel, stop fighting and surrender, surrender to God, surrender to jesus, what is surrender, how do i surrender, what does surrender look like, surrender novena, surrender meditation, surrender inspiration

Id: 0FgABq1NTBQ

Length: 11min 30sec (690 seconds)

Published: Tue Mar 30 2021