This show is sponsored by Better Help online therapy.
Take a minute to check your social battery. How's it doing? It's easy to ignore our needs,
and spread ourselves too thin sometimes. Therapy can give you the self-awareness to build
a social life that doesn't drain your battery. Learn more at Betterhelp.com/Super.
That's Better, H-E-L-P,.com/Super. Heeeey, Brotheeeeer. Guys, it is time for another Google autofill and today
is a special one because today we are asking Why does Voldemort Google autofill? Which, if you are a very longtime viewer, you may recall
I've actually done this one before in 2015. Today it's why does Voldemort Google autofill. Wow, look at me go. That was pre full-time
Super Carlin Brothers, pre-marriage. Like, I had a whole different job at that time.
A lot has changed since then. We have a much nicer intro, we're not using
the onboard camera microphone. Which, I actually have the original little SCB camera. This is where it all started. Like, I wonder if it still works. Oh, my God, it does. Does it, like,
look and sound like 2015? I'm doing the thing where I look over here and I need
to look here. I always made that mistake. I was really hoping the camera might explain why
my hair looked so bad back then, but maybe I was just off my shampoo routine. But also, since then, maybe- maybe- people have Googled, like, you know, new things about the dark lord. So, today, let's bring Why does Voldemort
Google Autofill into the present. [machinery noise]
[sizzling electricity noises] [Current Intro Theme Music] Hey, Brother! If you're not familiar with the Google autofill game,
it is super easy. We just go to Google, type in "Why does Voldemort" and then each letter of the alphabet, and Google fills in the rest of the question. Which I then answer with 100%-ish accuracy. Occasionally Google will throw in an extra word or modifier at the beginning, but that's okay. We just roll with it. A: [laughs] Oh, I remember this one. Maybe I'm wrong.
Maybe nobody Googles anything knew ever. Ahhh, I bet he has invisible hair.
Oh, I bet it's amazing. I still don't know why people are Googling this. And
if you try and Google why people are Googling it, you just get results for people asking why is this an autofill result. Is this some, like, secret Google code? What is going on? Or- probably more realistically-
it's just still a problem. Maybe Voldemort is still out there robbing
you all of your hair cleanser. Heck, maybe that's what was happening to me back in 2015. Voldemort was stealing my shampoo. Although, I have to say, clearly I got the better of him.
Feel like I'm actually having a marvelous hair day today. But, like, what does Voldemort even need
shampoo for? The man has no hair. Or does he? Okay, wait for it. New theory:
Voldemort has invisible hair. The real question, then, is, what kind of
hairstyle is he rocking under there? Like, bangs? Afro? Mullet? No, actually, I know definitely.
It is definitely mullet. B: Well, I wouldn't say he becomes evil. In fact, I would argue, he was born evil. It all has to do with the circumstances of his birth.
Like, we all know his mother, Merope Gaunt, used a love potion to force the handsome Muggle
Tom Riddle to conceive a baby with her. Then, after she was pregnant, she thought the baby would be enough reason for him to stick around without the potion anymore. But obviously she was dead wrong about that. He was not in love with her, not there for the baby and quickly
abandoned both of them. And Dumbledore has this to say about how it affected her: AKA, she began repressing her magic while she was pregnant. And if you don't know what happens when a witch or wizard starts doing that, it's exactly
what happened to Dumbledore's little sister Ariana. They form an Obscurus, a kind of magical
cancer that is almost always fatal. It's what Credence is in Fantastic Beasts. So, our theory is that the Obscurus became intermingled with, you know, fetus Voldemort and he grows up into a kind of walking, talking magical cancer conceived out of love, destined for evil. C: You know, that is actually a really good point, because they must have talked about it at some point, right? Pettigrew, what news do you have for us from
the Order of the Phoenix? Uh, actually, my Lord, could you call me Wormtail?
All my friends do. I am not your friend, Pettigrew. But that... that name is pretty cool. You can turn into- I'll meet you halfway.
How does worm butt sound? D: Ah. I can see why you might think that, as it is the spell Harry fires at him in the final duel, after which Voldemort dies that Expelliarmus kills him,
but that is not what happens. In that duel, Voldemort is using the Elder Wand against Harry, who is, at that moment, the actual Master of the Elder Wand. So, when
Voldemort tries to use it against Harry, it backfires and Voldemort actually
Avada Kedavra's himself. Which is great because it means Harry
never actually had to kill anyone. But if you're wondering why that didn't happen in the forest, it's because Harry didn't raise his wand to defend himself. He was trying to die. So, if he had fought back in the forest, then the same thing would have happened to Voldemort, but then the horcrux in Harry and Nagini
would have still been active, so Voldemort would have just reverted
back to that, like, mist form. E: I love this phrasing. Like, I love the idea of Voldemort at a restaurant ordering this. Yes, I'll have the Unicorn steak, as rare as possible. Breathing, if you can manage it. And what about you, Wormbutt? Do you want anything? Maybe some cheese? Ha ha ha. No, sorry, that was not the laugh. Ahh heh heh!! Ethan: In case you guys didn't know, that's our favorite clip. That is our most used clip here,
in case you couldn't tell. Muh huh huh. Either way, I think this question is actually asking why does he drink Unicorn Blood, which will keep you alive even if you're an inch away from death, at the cost of living a half life, a cursed life. But who would choose such a life? That's what we're told but here's the catch: Voldemort already has the horcruxes at that point, and so already can't die. The reason they're killing the unicorns is to protect Quirrell from dying. During the time when Voldemort is powerless, he would occasionally possess, like, rats and snakes for a time, but his presence inside of the animal
would usually kill them pretty quickly. Quirrell, however, is a wizard, and so
can handle Voldemort a lot longer. But, sure enough, he's still zapping the life out of him.
And while Voldemort has no real concern for Quirrell's life or well-being, he does need him to get the stone back, so he can get his own body back. F: Ah, this is, indeed, a tricky one. Like, is it just because Dumbledore is really powerful and could beat him in a duel? No. Think about it. Voldemort has no reason to fear that. Even if he lost, he has the horcruxes and would just come back. Plus the prophecy says only Harry is a threat to him. and yet he continues to fear Dumbledore. Why? It's because every time Voldemort meets Dumbledore, Dumbledore seems to know everything. Like, he knows about him bullying
the other kids at the orphanage. He knows Hagrid didn't open the Chamber of Secrets.
He knows the name Lord Voldemort before he should. He knows that Voldemort has death eaters
waiting in the village nearby. Dumbledore just seems to know
everything all the time, which is a problem. Because Dumbledore argues that love
is the most powerful kind of magic in the world. Love, Harry. Love. Voldemort, of course, thinks that's hilarious. Muh huh huh huh huh. There it is again. But, in the back of his mind, he knows that Dumbledore does keep being right about everything. And, like, what if- what if!- he's right about this, too?
Which, if he is, he's kind of screwed because, as we've already established,
Voldemort is incapable of loving. It's that little seed of doubt Dumbledore planted in the back of his mind basically the moment he met him that love is more powerful than anything Voldemort will ever do. That really makes Voldemort fear Dumbledore. G: Well, this one's actually pretty easy. Professor Trelawney makes a prophecy saying that the one with the power to defeat the Dark Lord will be born at the end
of July to parents who have thrice defied him. Snape overhears her making the prophecy and then goes and tells Voldemort at least the first half of it. And it turns out it could be referring
to either Harry or Neville, but Voldemort deems it to be meant about Harry,
because Harry is a half blood just like him. H: I mean, mostly because it's good for his platform,
and, like, recruiting Death Eaters and stuff. I mean, if your whole thing is just that, like,
pure-blooded wizards are the best things on earth, then it just follows that the less magical blood
you have, the more despicable you are. Plus I guess his Muggle father abandoned him and his mother before he was born so that probably plays into it, too. I: Uhhhhh, which time? Just kidding, I'll cover both. They're connected. He summers there. Wormbutt. Bring me the sunscreen.
And top off my Mai Tai. Why? What cocktail do you think he drinks? So, after Voldemort attacks Harry as a baby, he flees to the forest of Albania to hide out for the next, like, 10 years until Quirrell finds him. But the reason he chooses his location is because someone else chose it first: one Helena Ravenclaw, aka the Grey Lady who hid Ravenclaw's diadem in the same forest. And I guess Voldemort just thought it was a private enough place that he could hide out in peace. Also, if you're hiding, no one can come help you. But I guess Wormtail or Wormbutt already knows. But then I guess Dumbledore also seems to know so like why doesn't he... J: I love how personal that one was. But it's fairly simple. You see, the Battle of Hogwarts
is actually happening at the same time as the Battle of Wakanda and
Voldemort just doesn't survive the Snap. Also, also, actually, actually, this whole flaking away thing is just a movie thing so you know for sure that he's really dead. But, like, in the books, he just collapses
and is a regular old dead body. 50? Quite the ledger. Alright, guys, and now we need to take a brief pause right there to give a huge thank you to today's sponsor, Meundies. Okay, let's be real. Almost all the time, there is nowhere else I'd rather be than just cozied into my couch. But just like sinking into your favorite spot on the couch, Meundies wraps you in a cocoon of softness. It's like wearing the comfiest cushion around your nether regions, ensuring you feel relaxed and at ease all day long. I mean, I've been saying it for years.
I've been wearing them for years. But, like, no, actually I have been saying it for years
because I've been a subscriber for years. This is literally the only brand of underwear in my underwear drawer at this point. Because Meundies are truly the best.
And it's not just the softness. It's the prints. Like, whether you wake up feeling adventurous like llamas anyone? Or, like, lowkey. They've got me covered. Literally. And Meundies isn't just about underwear. They've got it all. They've got joggers, hoodies, robes, and more. And, like, honestly, I don't go, like, more than two days in my life without wearing joggers. I don't know about you guys, but that's, like,
my favorite article of clothing right now. But also, a second ago I said robes and more, and you might be, like, well, sure, more. What do you mean by more? And what I mean by more is dog hoodies. Yeah, the real thing. Check them out. They're glorious. That's definitely a gift they have not seen before. And the best part is Meundies has a problem free philosophy. Like, not happy with your first pair of undies? It's on them. Guys, good things come in big packages at Meundies. Get 20% off your first order plus free shipping at Meundies.com/Super. That's Meundies.com/Super for 20% off plus free shipping. Meundies: Comfort from the outside in.
Link is in the description down below. K: You know, I guess he really doesn't have to, does he? But, as his reason for visiting him is part of his quest for the Elder Wand, and he's under the belief that you need to kill its previous owner,
then killing Grindelwald is probably just good sense to cover your bases. L: Indeed. There is a two-part answer for this one.
First, just the act of splitting his soul so many times to make his horcruxes transforms his body some. Dumbledore describes it when
Voldemort goes in for the job interview. Actually, it's more like Harry describes it, but whatever. That's when Voldemort is there interviewing for the
Defense against the Dark Arts position, and he's actually there to hide the diadem. So, at that point, he's already made as many of his horcruxes as he'll make before attacking Harry. So, pre-falling that night, he actually did not look like a snake yet. Just like a distorted version of himself
but definitely transformed. Upon his revival in the graveyard, though, there is one specific ingredient in the potion that brings him back that ends up making him look more snake-like:
the venom of Nagini. This is the snake-like part of the potion that makes his eyes red, gives him slits for eyelids and nostrils. And, bear in mind that Nagini herself used to be human, so you can almost see where, like, her Venom was so useful in turning him
into a man that looks like a snake. M: Blurgh.
Bluchurgh. Huckawwwww. Is there a less comfortable two words in the whole story? Dolores Umbr-uuuuuuuuuuughhhck. Yeah, turns out. To remind you-
Hem, hem. Either way, when he says milk Nagini, what he means is harvesting her venom for the potion for his revival. All right we made it through. N: You know, the thing is, he does not need to.
If he just carried on being evil without paying Harry or the prophecy any mind at all, he totally would have succeeded. In fact, even after that, if he' just let anyone
else kill Harry, they would have succeeded. Wormbutt, listen up. You're the Potter's Secret Keeper, right? And you can transform into a rat, right? So, here's what I'm thinking. Tomorrow night
you just, like, sneak in and... crck. Game over. Although, to be fair, I feel like if Wormbutt had been given that task, he could not have done it. I don't think he could have killed James's baby.
Which is about as much as I could say for Wormbutt. If your only line you're not crossing is killing babies.
You'll let someone else do it! O: I mean, usually his goal is to kill people, and it is the most effective way to do that. But he does also use other spells. I mean, he has the whole duel with Dumbledore and casts Crucio and Imperio on Harry in the graveyard. Does that whole silver hand thing for Wormbutt. He is very, very good at magic and does all sorts of spells. But he's also just like really really good at killing.
It's like his favorite thing. P: Come here. Closer. Because he only has followers, not friends. Bahahahahahaha. Ahh heh heh!! Q: Easy one. So, after Quirrell fails to steal the
Philosopher's Stone from Gringotts, Voldemort is all like, yo, turbinator. That sucked.
From now, on I'm keeping a much closer eye on you. By which I mean, two eyes literally on the back of your head. I hope you're a stomach sleeper. He's not. You know, what's Voldemort going to do about it? Oh, sorry, can you not breathe? Hope you don't die. [chuckle] R: I assume this means at the Battle of the Ministry, but, like, basically Dumbledore had dueled him into a stalemate and Voldemort's final ace up his sleeve of
possessing Harry fails miserably. And at that point the rest of the ministry shows up. He's back. So, yeah. At that point, time to, uh, vamoose. Van Smoot, Lily! Van Smoot! This is a different word, but that's what it makes me think. Van Smoot!!! S: I'm telling you, guys, it's for his invisible hair. Or, I guess maybe for Snape. Although I guess even with all that shampoo he's steaing, it's, like, not helping. Or maybe Snape's just like not using it? Obviously. Or maybe- maybe- it's actually for Lucious to do research for his own line of shampoo, Luscious by Lucious. I mean, that guy knows something about hair.
How you think we're funding this Dark Lord campaign, hmm? T: Not because of his hair care routine, I'll tell you that. No, this is an odd one because, like, he and
Dumbledore kind of share this exact flaw. Like, they both believe Snape is lying to the other one, and they both must realize that only one of them can be right. But Voldemort's reason for believing in Snape's
loyalty is fear, while Dumbledore's is love. Which, ironically, is the very reason Voldemort fears him. U: Listen here, you greased up weasel bat. If I'm stealing all that shampoo for you, I expect you to use it. This is my day of Triumph and you look like a Baconator. A deep fried stick of butter. Wormbutt after he's milked Nagini. That jar of gross fat Molly Weasley keeps by the sink. You know how your hands feel after you've held a fish? [Ethan and Ben laughing] I was pretty proud of that one. Wooooo. That was funny. The entire North Carolina State Fair. LAX to Dulles. 2 hour delay on the tarmac.
In July. Middle seat. Ben: How is that not killing your voice? Oh, it is. Yeah.
Oh, okay. That's how you look right now. It's disrespectful.
Normally I'd kill you myself, but Nagini likes greasy food. So, eat up. I'm still thinking about the fish.
[Ben laughs] No, but actually, in the moment, Voldemort thinks Snape is the master of the Elder Wand, and that if he attacks him with it, the wand will backfire.
So, he uses Nagini instead. But, ironically, that exact thing is what
happens to him when he does fight Harry. V: You know, I don't know that he does.
But it would not surprise me at all. And kind of, like, even explain, like, the weird raspy voice. Wormbutt. Robe me.
Ahhh. Now, do you have any mint Juul pods or anything?
I could really go for a puff. I mean, you just know that just off screen in the graveyard, Voldemort has one of those, like, tacky vape shops. With all the like, the bright flashing neon lights, right? Voldi's Vapes. Snake Mango now in stock. I hate those places so much. W: Right, so, the first time he hears it,
he only gets the first half, which he thought was enough information to go on to kill Harry. But then, like, two failed attempts later, he seems to think maybe he needs to know the rest of it to make a more informed murder plot? Which actually, if he had gotten it there in year five,
I don't think it would have made any difference. But I suppose if he'd heard the whole
thing from the beginning, he'd have heard the part about marking Harry as his equal and maybe wouldn't have attacked him at all to begin with. Nothing for X. Y: Well, for the most part, he doesn't. He really only does it at the very beginning, because he's trying to adapt to wizard culture and norms, but abandons it pretty quickly after he's faced him. Although he does resort to this again in Deathly Hallows after Ron has, like, a surprisingly good instinct about not saying it. Something I don't think we give
Ron enough credit for. Like, he just instincts out the taboo. Like, he notices like an intangible curse go into effect. Z: Zyn? What is... what is Zyn? Hold on, I'm going to look it up. Ohhhh, oh oh. It's like the Vape form of dip?
Just like a straight nicotine pouch you put in your lip? Like, why why why would you... I don't... what?
Is that? Do people do this? I don't know, but I bet he gets some
discounts over of Voldi's Vapes. But, there you go, guys. That's everything
Google wanted to know about Voldemort in 2024. [Outro Theme Music] Hey, Brother! These socks are amazing! Guys, thanks so much for watching this video.
Don't forget to ring that bell or subscribe so you don't miss any new future
Harry Potter content from us. And in case you didn't know, Ben and I have recently launched a brand new Harry Potter podcast called Through the Griffin Door. It is like the
world's greatest Harry Potter book club. Each week, we read another chapter in the series and then we just discuss it at length, almost sentence by sentence. So, if that sounds like something you would like
to listen into, you can check out that video right here. Or, if you want to check out, like, the original
Voldemort Google autofill- I wouldn't, because it's so old- but that's right here. Otherwise, Ben, until next time,
I will see you in another life, Brother.
