Why “interested” men disappear and what to do about it (a powerful antidote)

I don't know if you will agree but men often act in very strange ways in relationships especially while you are still dating if a guy never has been interested in a certain woman then it can be normal that he suddenly disappears but what some women find out is that a guy who was previously even talking about having a future with them so the guy they were dating the guy they had an actual relationship with he can also disappear and not because he's been kidnapped not because he left the country so he can build a Children's Hospital in some poor country where his help is needed no no he just leaves and for some reason he doesn't even know how to explain himself maybe he doesn't give an explanation why does this happen why do some men do this let's go over a couple of reasons that will explain this phenomena and what to do about it I'm the author of a couple of best-selling books for women about dating and relationships and other topics like these books my pen name is Brian Knox my real name is here and I wonder whether any of the following has ever happened in your love life so you meet a guy and the two of you hit off really well and Lord Almighty there's a spark there is some chemistry starts to feel really good so you start dating that guy and slowly you start to wonder where this is going is their relationship potential seems that way this guy seems to be interested in a relationship he makes plans for the future when you have a date with him he shows up on time wearing matching socks if you get intimate with him he takes them off clearly this is a good guy he's putting in an effort but then all of a sudden everything starts to change he no longer talks about the future it seems as if he's no longer interested in the future with you when you text him something it takes him days to respond if he responds something disturbing is happening here because he is disappearing why does this happen this guy can be an immature man who still needs to grow up and then he did you a favor by disappearing because this is the guy who after he broke up with you if you're accidentally about to bump into him in the supermarket he will hide behind a pile melons or even a chicken pretending he didn't see you we're talking about that kind of immaturity here immature men scare easily men are often out afraid of spiders or mice not even big ones but when it comes to a committed relationship then immature men are terrified they run for the hills there's a lot of those immature guys living in the hills by the way so on a side note if you're ever on a first date with a guy and you ask him so where do you live and the guy says my aunts basement then that's a bad answer but if he says the hills I would still get out of there now there are two main reasons two mistakes actually why all of this happens with even with the normal guys where women have a role to play they have done something that freaks guys out even the normal ones let's go over those mistake number one some women base their actions and their investment in the relationship on how much they like him instead of on how much he likes them and then there's an avalanche of problems that starts with this because this is a domino effect so these women think I really like him so how can I make him like me more because it would be bad if he would disappear give him that I like him so much and I get it but these women are becoming afraid of losing him and that's a problem because what happens then is that these women become a weakened version of themselves becomes very easy to get jealous to become needy and so on and this can happen to any one of had famous women reached out to me after reading one of my books admitting they have made this mistake have had female CEOs of big companies as clients who had this happen to them and it's okay because when we as humans really fall for someone we start making them really important if we let everything run on autopilot and this is what happens so this is where for some women the problems then start when a man dates a woman and he's putting in a certain effort but she's putting in way much more as an effort she is going overboard she overcompensates she tries to please him because she likes him so much she goes out of her way to meet him she clears her schedule she buys sexy lingerie to impress him she cooks him a delicious meal while he arrives 20 minutes late with a cheap $5 bottle of wine wearing the same clothes he wore yesterday and may or may not have slept in what kind of message is that sending to this guy this guy should be offered some instant noodles and nothing else he doesn't deserve a great meal and he knows it that's the problem he knows it didn't earn all of this attention he knows he didn't put in enough of an effort and I exaggerate with my example here but this woman is basing her efforts on how much she likes him instead of the other way around now the antidote is easy it's always expecting to be respected regardless of how much you like him the more you like him the more you should be careful here this is easier said than done because love makes us blind but the trick is that even though there may be a lot of chemistry and you may have strong feelings for him never ever be afraid to be without him never be afraid to lose him and then it's much easier to remain yourself in that relationship and to do everything right make him live up to your standards if he then does something inconsiderate or he starts to spend a lot of time on other things like it seems like he's no longer interested in spending any time with you then you won't complain because if you give someone negative attention by complaining you're still giving them attention and an inconsiderate man does not deserve any attention so you become indifferent you make him less important instead and then immature men will leave because they always want to put in the absolute minimal amount of effort to still get what they want which is often just sex and never a committed relationship because they're terrified of that but good men mature men they will see a woman who has a lot of self-respect someone with strong values and boundaries and a lot of self-love and those happen to be the traits that great guys are attracted to this is what a great guy desires so this is a win-win no matter how much you ever fall for a guy no matter how much you love him no matter what types of feelings you have never be afraid to be without him and you will probably do everything right mistake number two having a high tolerance level I got an email yesterday from gray than a smart but an in love woman who had fallen in love with a high-profile business guy so they have been dating for a little over a year and on average she sees him four days per month four days that's it he doesn't have more time so he says he doesn't work all the time of course he also plays golf and has friends and lots of other hobbies it just doesn't have time for her and this is obviously not making her happy she's getting served leftovers she has already threatened to leave him and that worked he made more time for her for a full two weeks and then he went back to being his disinterest itself of course a guy won't change we don't have to be up psychic here to see that this woman will eventually end up with a man who will disappear completely and she shouldn't wait for that moment to come because what she's doing here is she is dreaming about everything that could be instead of looking at what is and what is as a guy that is continuously making her unhappy her tolerance level is way too high she shouldn't threaten to leave she should leave a goldfish can give her more affection and companionship than this guy ever will but this is not easy for her because again she's in love nevertheless she should lower her tolerance level if he says I don't have time to see you the next two weeks baby she should say no problem have fun with everything sweetie and then erase his number that's the only right reaction as soon as we realize that we are on the wrong train when it comes to love that the train is going into the wrong direction in other words that we are with a partner with the person who will not be able to make us happy because that person is proving it day after day then we should get off that train fast so to recap never be afraid to be without him this will attract guys will make bad men leave and ii have a very low tolerance level for continuous inconsiderate behavior if you ever have to revert to threatening to leave playing hard-to-get or any other games so a man would not disappear it's time to disappear on him there you go I hope you liked this video if you want more tips and videos and other things like podcasts and articles that I don't post over here come on over to Brian Knox com if you want to read or listen to any of my books go to Amazon type in my pen name Brian Knox you will get a full list thank you for watching this video I've loved making it for you as always I hope to see you in another one

Channel: Brian Nox

Views: 1,134,282

Keywords: Brian Nox, Dating Advice, Relationship Advice, Divorce, Breakup, break up, dating, get my ex back, get your ex back

Id: nMDnImNMZmc

Length: 9min 43sec (583 seconds)

Published: Mon Jan 28 2019