What is the most surprising thing your players have done in-game? #2 (r/askreddit)

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Ripper if you want to submit your story to be read with my buttery little baritone that's the spot where we are likely us to find it doesn't masters of Reddit what is the most surprising thing your players have done in a game part two the party had to fight a powerful marrow that had a talisman they needed instead of fighting him they tricked him into marrying a baboon that they polymorphed into a beautiful mermaid getting the talisman in exchange it was so absurd that I had to go along with it I was a newish DM at the time playing hot DQ players are in the swamp on their way to the castle in my description I say there is nasty swamp gas emitting from the bubbles within the water they proceeded to fill their bag of holding with it and use it as an air balloon to slowly float over it to avoid encounters allowed it because it was creative and hilarious one player says they want to Huff the swamp gas what his player Huff's it to lower the balloon and I decide to have some fun with the 10,000 magical side effects table he ends up summoning a buttload of Clippers piranhas into the water below them another player tries in his blood turns to acid but functions normally he jumps off the rope and dives so the Clippers bit him and they all died it was a great session and the only time my players have ever really been creative with the cards I deal them edit yes I now know the bag of holdings properties but this happened maybe a month into me ever playing I've been our group's forever DM edit - today I learned swamp gases farts this was far from the most surprising but it was the most recent they driven a brother duo of dwarves from town really do AG are in disguise then they decided that instead of following up on my elaborate plans for an under dark conspiracy campaign that they would instead fight the City Council over the dwarf brothers abandoned Forge so that they could work an elaborate real estate scheme I'm trying to figure out which under dark race would make the best realtors in an attempt to get the campaign back on track we sell games dour selves out of our dm's attempt to kill us all off wandered into I want to say Asmodeus one of the chaotic evil deities someone's castle at about level four one of our party was running chaotic evil and so was trying to get us all killed rest of us were some combination of lawful good and neutral we are wandering through the house trying to find something when we accidentally stumble into Asmodeus himself our chaotic evil friend had met with him previously to try to hand us over to him to kill so we're trying not to die and one of our party the mage decides to try the old Goku trick no see we're really weak right now so if you let us go in train and come back stronger it'll be much more fun for you it'll take more than just a look to kill us diem tells in knurl persuasion with disadvantage natural twenty on the first row natural twenty on the second row we walked out alive after the chaotic evil idiot there to die and never went back in one of my campaigns we had a knight who relied on mounted combat to be effective he told me after creating his character that he had a contingency plan should his horse die and all the details his character came with a buff and mute armor named Patsy and a little Squire whose name as far as anyone knew was Squire I was hesitant to add so many characters but since one was mute I allowed it eventually his horse is killed and he turns a side eye to me and goes I activate the contingency plan all the other players are so confused and dying laughing as he begins to execute his backup he pulls a backpack harness out of one of his packs and straps it onto patsies bath and climbs in and grabs his Lance and yells yah Patsey he practically piggybacks the rest of the game in order to get his mounted combat bonus one of the other players asked his Patsy okay with this and he responded Batsy has long dreamed of this day I am always amazed at the creativity of my crew had one guy whose character went by the name of Clancy Margus his character was a basket weaver who ran away from his family to pursue his passion of making baskets out of wild plants he was an elf that really had a way with nature well starting out his only true weapon were darts he was trapped high up on a tree with a pack of wolf dog like beasts at the bottom waiting for him to come down well he broke branches of the tree used the fibrous material to make a thin rope and attached it to the darts he then used a nearly perfect roll to launch that dart deep within the trunk of the tree next to us incredibly clever then he had a poor strength throw fell off while climbing across the Rope and injured himself falling onto the wolf slash man-beasts I made my party start the game as commoners in a non heroic kind of game the party as you would expect struggled at first but had a general idea of what they wanted to do and as they leveled up you could see how their actions affected their class choices inevitably we ended up with our fighters priests rogue and so on all but one of the group let's call him Jeff Jeff spent 12 levels on expert another non hero class and was in comparison to the others pretty useless Jeff's character was bullied and berated for the entire game fast forward a while and over the course of this game that has taken the better part of half a year Jeff has been reading up on trebuchet 'he's my boy and has become something of a real-life master of knowledge on the subject his character had been dumping points in knowledge 'as and engineering and been reading books on trebuchet stew he wanted to be some kind of siege expert well Jeff's character got sick of the group and found a cunning way to load the group into his magical trebuchet whilst they slept and he took watch Jeff's character fired the party out of trebuchet thus ending the game as none of them had any kind of slow fall abilities and took a healthy amount of damage that they didn't survive after defeating a harpy during the climb up a mountain they wanted to loot it I just told them they took a feather from it it was just a trophy the next encounter was a troll inside the cave they entered though the guy with the feather asked me if the troll was ticklish I said sure he told me he pulled out the feather and tickled him while distracted they slipped past it the genius was so good I had to let them proceed I was DMing for my mom and grandma they got hungry and butchered and ate a Hobgoblin I was so shocked I had no idea how to react I guess technically it's not cannibalism for an elf and a half elf to eat a Hobgoblin I had a player wish for himself to be turned into a stone block he'd been sent back in time somehow I forget exactly how as this game happened in 1996 and was trying to find a way back so he figured he could stand where the party was when he got sent back in time wish himself to be turned into a stump block with a message chiseled on it reading wish for me to be turned into character name his logic was they'd find the stone block waiting on their approach and his character would use his wish to change him back before being sent back in time so I did that and I said to him why didn't you just wish to go back to your own time he said oh I didn't think of that and he was duly laughed at by everyone my players tend to do some ridiculous stuff to the point where I could probably fill an entire thread with their shenanigans as you should but the first and best would probably have to be weaponizing butter oh this is gonna be a roller coaster ride kiddos during the first session the party found themselves in a small town library trying to figure out what's going on among other things they found a book with 1,001 uses for butter just as a throwaway detail they check it out as well and I think nothing of it after the session I asked for downtime actions and the party's mad scientist comes to me and says I want to make explosive butter I have him roll for it and he aces it he then posts a picture to our Facebook group along the lines of chicken plus stick of butter equals chicken shaped blast shadow plus cooked chicken the rest of the group runs with this and it leads to an ever-increasing spiral of butter related weaponry and paraphernalia buying a cow to secure their own supply and hiding it in their basement adding some herbs and spices to the mix and creating the basting grenade after building a BPG a different player took a skill specialty in food based weaponry this of course deserved an equally weird response in kind see this kind of abuse of butter didn't go unnoticed namely by the butter deity herself Paula Dean she waged a campaign of harassment against the party for infringing on her domain eventually culminating in summoning a skyscraper sized sentient corn-on-the-cob to crush them in the lore of this world butter is now a highly controlled substance and the French have become the most formidable military power in the world even when telling nan butter related stories from this game I can only ever refer to it as butter game TLDR players weaponized butter antagonized Paula Dean propel French to military supremacy that's the best story of the month my darlings I loved that one the most that I have heard sorry not sorry I feel no shame about dubbing that one king of may anyway or queen of may or monarch of may yes keeping with the alliteration theme one of the early plot hooks was an excommunicated priest having a vision of an angry bear guarding a cave they got into a debate reminiscent of the swallow coconut debate in Monty Python about whether a bear can properly be said to be angry they eventually decided to look for the bear not to investigate the vision but to see an angry bear looks like they turned the game into SimCity PCs are thrown into a dungeon for witchcraft yet broken out by an agent of the king who knows they are innocent wants them to take down the guy who's going around accusing anyone he considers impure of witchcraft because he is cleaning up the kingdom he has the support of a lot of Nobles who are bigoted [ __ ] that's why the throne can't act too openly against him and decides to employ the player characters if they kill him everyone will just assume it's out of revenge Kings agent basically gives them directions to where they can find this guy but they get caught up on the detail of some of the nobles being in with him and decide they want more details I asked for an example I threw out the name Lord Hobbs at random and now the quest is suddenly investigate Lord Hobbs for corruption while completely ignoring the guy who is actually responsible for all of this so now I need to make a map of Hobbs mansion and grounds for them to infiltrate stat out guards and such and invent something to happen turns out Hobbs is being blackmailed into compliance and isn't that bad a guy he tries to hire the PCs himself to go after witch finder douchebag so that I can get things back on rails and then just to tie off this plot cul-de-sac one of the witch finders agents kills him pcs finally go after the guy they were supposed to go after save the day and as a reward I have the King give them Hobbs title and mansion so I can reuse the nice map I made as their base and all seems well of course now they are technically the rulers of a small town immediately this becomes their primary focus ignoring any and all other plot hooks they want to improve the town which I now also need to map in detail invest money collect taxes pass ordinances improve trade routes etc adventuring is now just a way to acquire funds and defeat threats to the town which starts growing at an alarming rate gaming sessions are now 70% discussions on trade revenue allocation and fiddling with the town map not a DM myself but a pretty avid player with a couple of good friends the situation was that my friends and I were escorting a princess to the show Empire and on the way there happened to be a town that was being attacked the next events were turning out to be brutal with even the princesses specially-trained bodyguard dying in the midst of it while trying to come up with a plan we were made aware of a legend of a nearby dragon that could potentially help I being a sorcerer decided that I would probably have the easiest time convincing this dragon to help when I went to the cave the dragon was asleep waking it from its sleep wasn't really the greatest thing to do but the city needed help after waking him up I was immediately threatened with death thus a tribute could be given I didn't have a ton of gold with me so I thought I was just gonna die on the spot however I remembered that through past endeavors I had about 5 pounds of holy leaf Pathfinder version of weed so I proceeded to hype this dragon about the holy leaf and roll a 5 pound blunt for him with a cloak I was wearing to my surprise the DM allowed this and it worked I hooked a dragon on weed and I wrote him back to save the city while this is happening my DM and the rest of the party are all losing their [ __ ] because I just fed a noble dragon a blunt the size of a small baby in order to save the city hello you succulent [ __ ] peach yes you you're goddamn right thanks for tuning your beautiful looking balls to this wonderful little rabbit hall we call home we're so happy to have you here with us as we dive deep into the depths of Dungeons & Dragons depravity debauchery and dick jokes if this is your first visit please say hello in the comments if you have been here for a hot minute tell us a tongue-twister don't forget to check out our new subreddit our slash mr. Ripper if you got a story burning a hole in your big peepee if you feel like arguing over porn or finding an online tabletop gaming crew feel free to drop into our discord server and turn off the notifications immediately because it's honestly kind of a [ __ ] show but like the kind that you can't look away from and to be fair I think I like it that way so I'm about that life but anyways we got a DMD stream on deck soon we are building our characters stay tuned for the announcements and if you are interested in helping out the channel and helping out our friends who love Dungeons & Dragons please go and check out adventurers coffee company they got this wonderful dark roast they called dungeons and dark roast I'm about to make a video teaching y'all cuties how to make cold brew with it so stay tuned for that as well probably get that done this week if you haven't told someone you love them today it's probably a good time to do that before you go to sleep you know you put it out there you get it back that's how it works kiddos anyway thanks again for tuning in I love you and we will see you next time

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Keywords: #DnDStories, #DnD, #DungeonsAndDragons, dnd stories, dungeons and dragons, ask reddit, dungeons & dragons, askreddit top posts, reddit stories, dnd, dnd 5e, dnd stories reddit, dungeon master, dnd campaigns, dm tips 5e, dungeons and dragons online, best of reddit, dungeons and dragons cartoon, dungeons & dragons florida edition, gm tips, role playing game, askreddit funny, d&d beyond, reddit funny, critical role

Id: aQR8xoFnI2U

Length: 14min 38sec (878 seconds)

Published: Thu May 28 2020