Weekend Update: Denise McDonough and Doreen Troilo - SNL

>>> POLL NUMBERS IN THE SWING STATES REMAIN CLOSE, PUNDITS ARE SPECULATING THIS ELECTION COULD BE DECIDED BY THE FEMALE VOTERS OF SUBURBAN PHILADELPHIA. PLEASE WELCOME TWO UNDECIDED VOTERS FROM CLIFTON HEIGHTS, PENNSYLVANIA, DENIES McDONOUGH AND DORIN TROYER. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] >> HI, COLIN JOST. >> HI, COLIN JOST. >> WELCOME TO NEW YORK. >> WE BROUGHT YOU SOME HAGGIS. >> THANK YOU. SO LADIES, HOW DOES IT FEEL TO BE THE MOST SOUGHT-AFTER VOTERS IN THE COUNTRY RIGHT NOW? >> I LOVE IT. >> I THINK IT'S FUN. >> HAVE YOU DECIDED WHO YOU'RE GOING TO VOTE FOR? >> COLIN, I'M TORN. FROM A SCOOTER ACCIDENT. [ LAUGHTER ] BUT ALSO -- I DON'T KNOW WHO I'M GOING TO VOTE FOR. >> ME NEITHER. I THINK THEY'RE BOTH BAD. >> WHATEVER, YOU LOVE TRUMP. >> I DON'T LOVE TRUMP. >> WELL STOP ACTING LIKE YOU DO, EVERYONE THINKS YOU LOVE TRUMP. YOU'RE ALWAYS LIKE, "OH, HIS HAIR'S REAL, YOU KNOW." [ LAUGHTER ] [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] >> I SAID IT ONE TIME. GET OFF MY BRA STRAP, COOL POLICE. I DON'T LIKE TRUMP. I DON'T LIKE THAT HE CALLED ALICIA MACHADO FAT. >> I KNOW. LIKE DOES THIS GUY HAVE MIRRORS IN HIS HOUSE? HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE OPENED A QUESADILLA TO PICK THE CHICKEN OUT. [ LAUGHTER ] >> AND WHAT DO YOU GUYS THINK OF SECRETARY CLINTON? >> UHH -- NOT A FAN. >> REALLY? >> SHE LIED ABOUT HER E-MAIL. SHE LIED ABOUT BENGHAZI. SHE PRETENDED TO BE SURPRISED ON STEVE HARVEY. SHE ALSO CALLED PEOPLE A BASKET OF DEPLORABLES. AND THAT'S NOT A PHRASE. >> HERE'S MY PROBLEM. HILLARY'S HUSBAND CHEATED ON HER AND I DON'T LIKE THE WAY SHE HANDLED IT. >> SO YOU THINK IT WAS NOT FEMINIST OF HER TO DISCREDIT GENNIFER FLOWERS -- >> WHAT? NO, I DON'T LIKE THAT SHE DIDN'T FINISH THE JOB. A GIRL'S BANGING YOUR HUSBAND FOR 12 YEARS? AT THE VERY LEAST YOU'VE GOT TO CUT OFF HER PONYTAIL. >> BARE MINIMUM, YOU CUT THE PONYTAIL. >> GOT TO GO FOR THE TAIL. >> COLIN, WE BROUGHT YOU THIS. I APOLOGIZE, I'VE BEEN ON VACATION. >> ONCE A YEAR SHE GOES TO JAMAICA. >> OH, YEAH. >> WHEN A GIRL FLIRTED WITH MY HUSBAND, I RELEASED MICE INTO THE DROP CEILING OF HER PIZZA PLACE. >> THIS ONE'S NOT PLAYING GAMES. >> NO, NO SHE'S NOT. HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT THESE SHOCKING REVELATIONS WHERE DONALD TRUMP SAID, WHEN YOU'RE A STAR YOU CAN DO ANYTHING TO WOMEN? >> I GET IT. >> UMMM -- IT DOESN'T BOTHER ME. >> YEAH. >> WAIT, YOU GUYS ARE NOT MAD? >> WHEN YOU'RE A BIG STAR LIKE THAT, YOU KNOW, THE RULES ARE JUST DIFFERENT. LIKE, IF YOU'VE EVER BEEN TO THE PHILADELPHIA MUMMERS PARADE ON NEW YEAR'S -- HAVE YOU EVER BEEN TO THAT, COLIN JOST? >> NO, I HAVE NOT. >> YOU SHOULD GO, IT'S TERRIBLE. [ LAUGHTER ] >> ANYWAY, A LOT OF THE GUYS IN THE CLOWN BRIGADE ARE ALREADY DRUNK. SOMETIMES THEY MIGHT HONK YOUR BOOB ON THE WAY DOWN THE STREET. I THINK TRUMP IS JUST KIND OF LIKE THAT. >> SO HE'S LIKE A DRUNKEN CLOWN ON THE STREET? [ LAUGHTER ] >> YEAH, LIKE THAT. >> MEN ARE ALWAYS GONNA BE GROSS. [ LAUGHTER ] REMEMBER -- REMEMBER WHEN --REMEMBER WHEN -- ME AND PATRICE PUNCHED OUR WAY TO THE FRONT ROW AT THE HOOTERS CONCERT AT THE MANN MUSIC CENTER? >> YES. >> THE GUY WHO BLOWS KEYBOARDS PULLED ME UP BY THE PERM AND WENT TO TOWN ON ME LIKE I WAS HIS MOUTH PIANO. >> I THINK IT'S CALLED A MELODICA. >> BUT IT'S ALSO CALLED TWO FREE T-SHIRTS AND A RIDE HOME. DON'T SLUT SHAME ME! [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] IT WAS LIKE FOUR YEARS AGO. >> OUT OF ALL OF THEM THE ONE THAT I THINK IS SECRETLY THE BIGGEST JACKASS, MIKE PENCE. >> YOU DON'T LIKE PENCE? HE SEEMS LIKE THE NORMAL ONE. >> HE SEEMS NORMAL BECAUSE HE'S NEXT TO TRUMP, HE'S REALLY BIFF FROM "BACKING TO THE FUTURE." YOU KNOW HE BACKED THAT LAW IN INDIANA SAYING, IF YOU'RE REAL JESUS-Y YOU CAN REFUSE TO SELL PIZZA TO GAY PEOPLE. FIRST OF ALL, INDIANA, NO ONE WANTS YOUR GARBAGE PIZZA. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] ALSO IT'S 2016. WHAT OLD WHITE MAN THINKS HE'S STILL IN CHARGE OF GAYS AND WOMEN? FIT TO FEEL LIKE IT'S THE '50s AGAIN, I'LL PUT ON MY PINK LADIES JACKET FROM THE "GREASE 2" PARTY. >> SO FUN, SO FUN. >> START A CONVERSATION WITH MY GRANDPA WHO IS DEEP IN THE THROES OF DEMENTIA. >> THIS IS -- THIS IS WHY I CAN'T DECIDE. I'M PARALYZED, COLIN JOST. WE BROUGHT YOU HOAGIES. >> THANK YOU FOR THE HOAGIES. ARE YOU GOING TO WATCH THE DEBATE TOMORROW NIGHT? >> I'LL PROBABLY PUT IT ON AFTER "HALLOWEEN WARS." >> YEAH. OH, THAT SHOW IS MY FAVORITE. THEY DO PUMPKINS AND CANDY. >> THEY DO CHOCOLATE WORK AND BAKING AND PUMPKINS. AND THEY WORK TOGETHER TO MAKE SOMETHING REALLY CREEPY. >> WHY CAN'T OUR COUNTRY BE LIKE HALLOWEEN WARS? WE'RE CREEPIER TOGETHER. >> SO ARE YOU VOTING FOR HILLARY? >> I'M PROBABLY WRITING IN HOOTERS. >> TWO UNDECIDED VOTERS FROM SUBURBAN PHILADELPHIA. >> FOR "WEEKEND UPDATE", I'M MICHAEL CHE. >> I'M COLIN JOST. GOOD NIGHT AND HAVE A PLEASANT TOMORROW.

Channel: Saturday Night Live

Views: 3,245,645

Rating: 4.7721467 out of 5

Keywords: Episode 1706, Weekend Update, Colin Jost, Michael Che, Jimmy Fallon, Tina Fey, Undecided Voters, SNL, Saturday Night Live, season 42, live, new york, comedy, sketch, funny, hilarious, late night, host, music, guest, laugh, impersonation, episode 2, Lin-Manuel Miranda, Hamilton, In The Heights, broadway, tony, puerto rican, rap, sing, musical, writer, dancer, Twenty One Pilots, heathens, stressed out, suicide squad, drummer, singer, tyler joseph, josh dun

Id: rxXaEh1eEwc

Length: 5min 55sec (355 seconds)

Published: Sun Oct 09 2016

Reddit Comments

[u/OnlySpoilers]

Fallon sounds exactly like Dennis from always sunny in chardee macdennis 2 when they have to do accents

[u/[deleted]]

relevance to philly started with the eagles sweater and ended with the transfer of ownership of the hoagies

[u/MasterOfAutisticArts]

The fun part is that Tina Fey went to high school right in the area they are mentioning. She was spotted in Wawa in Drexel Hill on Friday. That's most definately how they got the idea to name drop Clifton. It's tiny and obscure. No one is going to recognize the name.

[u/TheTwoOneFive]

The skit would be way funnier with practically any other cast member or comedian besides Fallon. Was Amy Poehler busy?

[u/Sardoodledum]

My God when Tina Fey was talking with her Delco accent she sounded just like my aunt...who is from Delco.

[u/[deleted]]

I've lived in Philadelphia for 27 years and hate that Tina Fey does the Delco accent so well

[u/burnz1]

A Verona reference!!

[u/cheeeeeese]

they do sorta look like philly chicks, especially fallon.

[u/[deleted]]

Did anyone else think their accents sounds more southern (like Georgia) than Philadelphian?