We Tested ICONIC Toys from Every Era

[Music] I went on eBay and I bought a bunch of toys from the Vintage era and no one stop until someone bleeds hello welcome back to cold ones today we're going back in time to the 90s when you wake up in the morning there's all that first bowl of cereal your mum brings you that toast what are you eating oh nice big bowl of weet-bix in America probably Fruity Pebbles you watching that last five minutes of that episode of One Piece but your dad's yelling at you hurry up to leave so you don't miss the bus and his dad starts budgeting you simpler times oh yeah you turn on Nintendo 64 and you get your bag of twisties and there's a Tazo in there oh what's up I went on eBay and I bought a bunch of toys from the Vintage era between 2004 and 1983 I'm gonna get these fellas to open it up and test it out and see what they think we're gonna get some angry comments I reckon why for [ __ ] 2004 man that ain't finished man all right that was 20 years ago I was playing with the hoop and a stick in the 70s man it's Christmas chat uh it's 2004 you've just unraveled the Christmas tree and your mum got you oh a Shrek action sketch I'm mad that once we take this plastic off you won't get this satisfying sound turn the knobs and watch Shrek's ears go I can't wait this crank Shrek's knob and watch his ears go grab tracks can watch him go Etc why didn't they come up with that because that sucks what and twist his knobs and let him go is I've seen enough man Chad what what do you want me to do oh there's a real etching sketch it's tiny you guys are having a competition the winner gets to keep that Darcy what are we drawing Shrek this [ __ ] is the most [ __ ] difficult thing in the world you just have to go slow like shut up all right I'm starting from here let's go let me get that track nope where the which way is the [ __ ] thing go okay Max that's looking good no I'm not that I can erase like the tiniest bit I give up you win fair game Max is the winner okay let me put to try to get the eyes on this [ __ ] thing I think Max has like the problem where he picks something up and he's like I can't put it down until I've done the task at hand if I only commit to doing other things like what your taxes yeah there you go that's pretty good that's his [ __ ] ears those black bits of his eyes this round bit is his massive nose may be too big and he's grinning in those serious shoulders good job Google how to get it back yeah there's an undo button on the back shut up nah have you guys seen that been Breaking Bad where he gets thermite from it can we make a bomb because that kind of sucked it's Shrek too bro that's a good movie I haven't seen it but you haven't seen Shrek no I've seen Shrek I'm frag in there we see Shrek too yeah I've seen him off what happens in Shrek 2 [ __ ] go the swamp this is from 2001. oh is that Rock'em sock'em robots you've never played this in real life no how old are you what just part of the action well the world only yes my head is and now we shouldn't pop out when you press it Darcy I didn't [ __ ] make it bro oh good shot now I'm gonna do the [ __ ] suplex you're only gonna do the Boston down ready three two one five rounds round one ding ding ding yes a ding ding ding out there ding ding ding yes your game bro good game good game good game what the hell they really invented that I thought that was just in cartoons for a joke kind of was like that'll never work that would never take it I thought that was bollocks that's awesome this is the last one of the 2000s ERA this is 2000. this is going to be a journey of figuring out how this thing works all right I used to have one of these as well how are you rich I had a better one than that though really I think it was like bigger maybe you just got bigger are they like [ __ ] you to the dog I know they turned it you say that they just picked the dog out the back and [ __ ] feed me my special dog bone when I'm hungry that sounds [ __ ] uh big expressive eyes show my emotions Chad do you remember what it was like being a child no I am an adult and I don't remember I don't remember all the drugs and alcohol over my years have crippled my memory to the point where I can't remember what I did last week I [ __ ] hate this [ __ ] bruh just rip its legs off it's 2006 again and my mum's putting the batteries into my car I'll pretend to be that alcohol yeah put the back on what the [ __ ] this dog is [ __ ] rabbit [ __ ] that took a bite out of me bruh get back get back I wanted you shut up let me [ __ ] put a muzzle on you it says he'll fall asleep when it's dark because there's a lot no no no no no no bit me I have an idea to put him to sleep man that dog can drink it pissed itself [Music] okay this thing is Bulletproof some match has got to be put down He essentially just gave him a haircut oh he looks like a pit bull now or something oh pull one out for my dog poochie man I Harry Potter one in him this next one is from 1998. we're getting close when I was born are they wearing cool shirts Oh I thought it was like Hungry Hungry Hippo yeah that would have been [ __ ] awesome what's this Perfection I have never heard of this in my life foreign I felt like that one was his nipple that still looks better than Marvel CGI I'm gonna keep it real with you you've got to put that in there before the time runs out or else it pops I mean I feel like I could easily beat a kid's game but basically up here is a timer right yeah when you're ready you press start and you start trying to put the bits in and once you've got them all in you have to press stop work against each other and you try to beat whichever thing all right Count Me In Darcy three two seven I'm going you gotta put it in Chad yeah I didn't know where it went so I just put it to the side until I'm ready [Music] no you didn't you had bits rest shut up no I didn't I got them in no roll back the footage three two one go okay [ __ ] this is way harder than I thought I gotta sit across got a [ __ ] that brother it is right there okay oh there's a real one there it is that's impossible I was pretty close I feel like in the ad of seven kids playing it at once though so it's not fair but we're adults I mean do you guys want to see if you beat it together you both get half a Snappy easy I'm preemptively predicting the comments did that with my goddamn iPhone in like 30 seconds you know I'm [ __ ] from Reddit and I can solve a Rubik's Cube shut the [ __ ] up three oh two one go okay okay stop stop [Music] oh [ __ ] are we about to get [ __ ] Mr Beast come on bro yeah we [ __ ] did it [ __ ] be the kids game it only took two men to be the children's game all I heard was we beat it okay I'm gonna [ __ ] that [ __ ] up later bro sit my dick in that later ah so this is one year earlier 1997 is the next one yeah I was born suck them seems unethical that looks [ __ ] it does look so he's beat the [ __ ] out of each other there's no way they're safe if you hit you like your mom's base off the [ __ ] counter or something I mean my mum and dad used to put actual boxing gloves on me and my brother and say no one stops until someone bleeds but that's real what yeah why because we'd fight and they wouldn't want us fighting with each other's fears so they'd be like put the punching gloves on we either stop till someone cries or bleeds I usually cried before I bled that sounds lit blow them up and put your dick hand inside for boys and girls indoors and Outdoors more fun than a pillow fight I feel like this came out now this company would be sued well they actually are out now and the only thing they had to change was the name from sock'em Boppers to Soccer Boppers because Rock 'em sock and robots yeah these guys sued them because they had sock'em in the name tell you what bro put some glad wrap and some butter in that I feel like Mega Man that's a little you [ __ ] tell me oh [ __ ] round one is over back to your Corners I'm so exhausted I'm throwing that punch I need a Grog bro oh Grog coaster [ __ ] we're on fear three two one guy for his stomach then [Laughter] more Grog than we [ __ ] drink I swear we'll eventually seep into everything in the room and everything else will become Grog this next one is 1996. that's my birthday is it a pop vinyl oh Magic 8-Ball did you have one of these as a kid because I did yeah so I saw it on Toy Story and I was like Mom I need one of those in my life the Beast I've been saying this ask your question view the answer through the window 20 possible answers you're self-explanatory will Darcy ever have a gay experience most likely will Markiplier ever come on cold ones it is decently so what does that mean it is decidedly so ah does that mean yes yeah ah okay why don't you just say yes then okay because everything in here is basically yes I know with a different thing will Scott ever financially recover from his bad cool shirts sales yes definitely hey if you want to get a cool shirt over shirts for Z not cool use coco once 10 off well anyone buy from this ad proposal on the video [ __ ] you people will Grog be the best selling alcohol in the world Outlook not so good reply hazy try again oh for [ __ ] sake we're gonna have to drink all of these what the eight balls will Grog let us retire my reply is no shut up no it's wrong are you a hundred percent certain Mr eight ball as I see it yes Outlook not so good I think it's settled I feel like we should put a pin in this should I go and gamble all my money tonight at the casino it is certain well I win it is decidedly so I've got a crown first time to Crown off an eight ball and I wish I could go in man [Laughter] I feel uh Grim now it's time to dive into the past back to 1995. ah that was the year I was born this is the most Mint Condition package out of all the things I've bought for its age ah this is another toy my mum wouldn't let me [ __ ] buy the [ __ ] had one and I rocked up to his birthday party last because my dad's an alcoholic and he couldn't drive me there sent away from mum to finish work and when I got there they'd use all the ingredients so I couldn't even use it that's a slime it's a slime you make slime I'm so excited for this Chad have you considered how long it's been sitting on the shelf shut up best used by Night March 1998. [Music] thank you [Music] all right that's everything let's get cooking first recipe fill a hot tap water to the line five tablespoons so we got one of these add three and a half tablespoons of brains powder one two two three that's some good powder four five and a little bit more dad you you fill the water to the line and then you add teaspoons of the powder oh say look how [ __ ] [ __ ] well today guys I'm gonna put my spoon in here and mix and I'm gonna oh no no I oh I missed a little bit to the right oh there you go and I'm gonna stir it slowly slowly I'm a slow stereo this radioactive okay this is done get off me and now I'm gonna add one and a half teaspoons of brain and a little bit of garlic it's a tiny bit yeah oh what oh that's not good oh Max to your actual brain by the way that tastes radioactive wow do you want to try this is actually quite nice Chad stop it's not stew that [ __ ] went out a date before I was born like what the [ __ ] that is good there's enough preservatives in this to last forever this stuff definitely has red for you whoever's editing this can you please put up on red 40 is I think that sounds like something that people say never put that in your body it's only legal in America now I'm gonna make some [ __ ] creatures my assistant Frankenstein here it's gonna bring me some of that blue blue [ __ ] clock [Music] [Laughter] now we're gonna get dressed in the appropriate you learn tired purple creature power you'd add four teaspoons of this mix into the thing two three four okay and then four tablespoons of warm water that's a teaspoon you need the big one okay one ah I'm Dr Dreadful say that I'm gay so the broom pull the lever ah and push it down push whoa oh that worked that worked next thing we're gonna make is cool down blue bath I'm a scientist uh fill the nuclear tank with cool tap water Frankenstein we need nuclear bar ah finally nuclear bar one two three three scoops you can add a Sprinkle of brains powder to it if you want what do you mean if you want I had a glow creature with a Sprinkle of brains powder part two I need to add part two this [ __ ] can not be [ __ ] healthy I forgot you had a grow tour that tastes good oh that's so sour the last thing we're gonna make is called the news finally nuclear overflow cheers brother cheers all right let's see if the creatures are done you ready I mean no there's a creature here look there's a little little bat hmm little creature and I feel [ __ ] up this next toy is from 1991. 1991. I was here I was born happy birthday okay this looks old this is solid wow foreign here at the start position and you need to get up into this pedestal and you just follow the arrows and you bump it to get it there oh [ __ ] yes [ __ ] I'm gonna kill myself I feel like this is the best strategy oh Chad your turn [Music] nice why are no streamers speedrunning this [ __ ] what the [ __ ] happened oh what was that yeah let's go champ I win this is from 1989. the year I was born ripping the middle like that yeah our moon boots whoa all this [ __ ] smells like the [ __ ] late 80s bro [Music] and that's better than half the Drake albums these days that song went off what's wrong oh [ __ ] you're sick aren't you I [ __ ] sick Moon shoes kid powered anti-gravity device take a leap how high can you get strap of mine and you're out of here don't leave Earth without them all right I'm going to the [ __ ] moon man oh they're huge you think that's gonna last only one way to find out I got extra elastic I feel how stretchy it is you guys ready I'm going to the Moon that's copyrighted oh that's when they fake the moon landing the same year these came out on the moon yeah I'm going to the Moon that would mean it was real wait a minute where's the flag that's meant to be on the moon it has no curve look at all these starlink satellites [Music] I feel like that would have been cool if I was like less overweight this next one is 1986. that's when Chad was born this is a real character Gumby yeah what do you mean I thought it was like made up in movies because it was funny what the [ __ ] what the [ __ ] I'm learning a lot today someone have to get inside of it or just blow up try this on the [ __ ] toy oh repair patch included in case we [ __ ] a hole in it this isn't a Gumby this is a blunt mattress are you pranking us we must have been [ __ ] scammed on eBay shut up shut the [ __ ] up hold his arms not yet wait no I'm not what the [ __ ] oh mercy that's about that repair patch okay that's enough well what was that what were those marbles the last one is one is one because here is actually Chad's birthday what year 1983. wow happy birthday Chad you can open it Darcy you shouldn't have it was your credit card what is this Firefox F7 exciting space action 3d effect okay I'm gonna hit start yeah oh this little cheeky [ __ ] is Crafty they didn't have enough [ __ ] memory for this oh it literally just changed color [Music] s this sucks we have come a long way with technology I'll tell you that much yeah let's not [ __ ] on it I love that yeah no it was good all right guys that was a [ __ ] trip Through the Ages did you see any of the toys that you used to play with when you were young thanks for watching subscribe to the patreon your [ __ ] pulls out of the DJ like

Channel: Cold Ones

Views: 1,437,110

Keywords: toys, toy review, cold ones, maxmoefoe, anything4views, wish, retro toys, reviewing retro toys, old toys, antique toys, toys era, most popular toy, most popular 90's toy, 90's toys, 90's toy review, unboxing 90's toys, 80's, 80's toys, old toy ads, retro toy ads, old toy commercials, toys from the 90's, toys from the 80's, we bought, we bought every 90's toy, moon boots, shrek, Etch A Sketch, vintage, toys from the 1990's, 1990, 1980, discontinued toys, discontinued

Id: Ey5PJdcjYKs

Length: 22min 12sec (1332 seconds)

Published: Sun Oct 08 2023