I am the Sandguardian! Guardian of the Sand! Poseidon quivers before Him! FUCK OFF!!! Why are you making me sing, I hate singing When do I even come in, I don't aha... Starts singing "All I Want For Christmas Is You" by Mariah Carey Stop! I could've dropped my croissant! I just wanted to use the restroom But now I'm so confused Am I a womfn? AM I A WOMFN??? Got diagnosed with cool guy syndrome yesterday, haha! Now I take Adderall, haha! Hey I'm lesbian. I thought you were American??? And they were roommates. Oh my god they were roommates The good news is : you're not sick. And the bad news? Well you'll be reliving this 6 second moment for the rest of your life oh god NO! 🎵Baby can't stay🎵 🎵Baby it's cold outside🎵 🎵I've got to go🎵 🎵BABY IT'S COLD🎵 "All I Want For Christmas Is You" by Mariah Carey MHMHMH! That is not correct Because according to the encyclopedia of lsjbvldasbvadvbadjlv """""Two""""" shots of vodka No don't! Huh? Okay Dear Diary, today just went from good to great. Mmmh, the ice is slippery ISIS? Yeah the ice is... ISIS. No, the ice is... ISIS. ISIS. ISIS. ISIS. ISIS. ISIS. ISIS. ISIS. ISIS. Welcome to bible study, we're all children of Jesus... 🎵Kumbayaaa, my Lord!🎵 Hi, welcome to chili's ADAM! There's just something about hitting that whip that just you know, like Oh! Watch this: Booom It just keeps me going... Don't be afraid to be exactly who you are. Even if it means being a little different Even if it means being a football Or an iPad! Emergency? Somebody at our Prom has been killed please help! Calm down, we don't want a Panic! At The Disco. "I Write Sins Not Tragedies" by Panic! At The Disco Stop saying I look like Chicken Little! He's dumb, and he's a coward! AND I'M NOT A COWARD! What are you doing this summer? Oh! I'm actually going to Madagascar! Ooh! i'M gOiNg To MaDaGaScAr Jared could you
read number 23 for the class? No I cannot. Waddup? I'm Jared, I'm nineteen And I never fucking learned how to read So how was the pasta? Oh! It was great, send my compliments to the Chef! Alright! Hey Chef! Yeah? You have beautiful eyes. "Two Of Hearts" by Stacey Q 🎵You are my Daaaad🎵 🎵You're my Dad! Boogie Woogie Woogie🎵 Hey everybody today my brother pushed me So I'm starting a kickstarter to put him down. The benefits of killing him would be I would get pushed way less. You can't sit with us! Actually Megan, I can't sit anywhere! I have Hemorrhoids. "Take On Me" by a-ha Objection your Honor!
What is it? *smacks* Overruled! This one's to end racism! "Cool for the summer" by Demi Lovato *Flexing on piano and singing skills* 🎵Shut the - hell up🎵 Today I will be playing Mozart's Symphony No 40 in G Minor o h m y g o d Are there good cops? Let me show you something He's right in here Let's let him sleep I saw you hanging out with Kaitlyn yesterday But, Rebecca, it's not what you think! I won't hesitate, bitch! Happy Chrismas It's chrismmm Merry crisis Merry chrysler "Drop It Like It's Hot" by Snoop Dogg ft. Pharrell We will now play the deceased's favorite song : "SIMPLE2" from iMovie "The child (Faze action tea party mix)" by Alex Gopher "Around the World (La La La La La)" by ATC "All I Want For Christmas Is You" by Mariah Carey "Shots" by LMFAO ft. Lil Jon "Run Away With Me" by Carly Rae Jepsen It is Wednesday my dudes aaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAH ??? Are they helium balloons? i told you, the car is not to have helium balloons!! ah it's too late we're flyin away!! Hahaha I do that! What's your name? What the fuuuck? Go to del taco, they got a new thing called FR E SH A FR E EHEH FR E SH A VOCA DO FR E SH A VO That awkward moment when you're scrolling through someone's old instagram photos And you accidentally comment the entire declaration of independance Oh shit "Smooth Criminal" by Michael Jackson You'll never save prince Horace, I, king dragon, will strike you down... ... Dennis Hehe that's me Who do you think the hottest girl in school is The epcot ball Well I like Melanie and not just cause she's pretty... Epcot.... Road work ahead? Uh? Yeah! I sure hope it does! "Yeah!" By Usher feat. Lil Jon, Ludacris Hey Babe Happy one year Im 27- 🎵I want to see my little boy🎵 🎵Here he comes🎵 🎵I want to see my little boy🎵 Well if it isn't captain America But it is me No its an expression Your nazi tricks won't work on me There's only one race: The human race- What about NASCAR? Why do we need labels? Gay? str*ght? We're all human! Are you eating mayonnaise? It's just food, why do we need labels? STOP "You make my dreams" by Daryl Hall & John Oates Like, I'm not a racist, but... No you are You are a racist butt. CHRIS IS THAT A WEED No this is a crayon I'M CALLING THE POLICE 911 what's your emergency?
While the X-Files theme plays I mean, four female ghostbusters? The feminists are taking over! I'M AN ADULT VIRGIN
On the ghostbusters theme 🎵two bros, chillin in a hot tub🎵 🎵five feet apart cause they're not gay🎵 I'm coming out *GASP* As my favorite Diana Ross song *sigh* Because it reminds me of how gay I am gOd DaMn I was born in the wrong generation I wish I was around in the 13 hundreds Where there's no clean water or electricity And everyone died from the plague "Take On Me" by a-ha So no head? Hehe 420 Do you even smoke weed dude? No it smells gross and brownies are good enough on their own Also is 420 a weed thing How did you take down captain America? We shot him in ze legs Because his shield is the size of a dinner plate and he's an idiot So like are you a boy or a girl? ARE YOU AN ASSHOLE OR A BIG BITCH? guys.... The goggles snapped aaaaAAAAAAAH "Summertime Sadness" By Lana Del Rey I got new goggles my dudes aaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAH I'm an LGBT ally and this is a safe space! So what are your kinks? Confusion and disgust What??? Why???? 💦 Dear diary, Today I couldn't find my diary So im writing this on both of my kung fu panda 2 dvds Here it is : the Tumblr logo. What do you think? You think this is a goddam joke? Hurry up we're gonna be late for school Bro, chill, I don't know why you're in a big time rush Big time rush theme starts playing "I don't mind" by Usher ft. Juicy J Thanks for cutting the cake for us Why is the inside of the cake blue? The cake has spoken!
What? The child shall have a dong! (Penis, penis, penis, penis)
ALL HAIL GENDER Hey beautiful, what's your name? Huh! No! Miss me with that gay shit! Oh? So there's no... Mister Mewiththatgayshit? "Take On Me" by a-ha PUSSY
