Behzinga:<i> This is how
I became who I am.</i> <i> Teenage Cancer Trust
have asked me</i> <i> to run the London Marathon,</i> and there's
no other answer than yes. <i> When I started this journey,</i> there really was
no athletic ability
inside of this body. Virus is ruining the world! <i> It's kind of hard to find the
motivation to push yourself.</i> It's just been really--
it's really tough. -<i> I'm gonna go to the toilet. </i>
-<i> He was turning to alcohol.</i> He wants everybody to think
he is Behzinga. I literally made him
shit himself. Fire walk must employee
mind over matter. I love my friends so much. <i> ( music playing )</i> Ethan in three words?
Oh, hilarious... - ...determined...
- The height of Everest in four days
on this staircase. ...and opinionated. The people that ask
the questions are weird.
They are weird. They are so odd. My goals have never been to be
someone in the public eye
or recognized. I knew that there was
an audience to be gained
for something, but it was mainly to be gained,
from my eyes, for creating something
other people would enjoy. ( shouting ) My brother used to call him
"the boy in the room" because he only ever spoke
to people online. Behzinga: I think there's such
a shift now, but other times, if people knew you was making
gaming videos online, you were sort of
viewed as just like,
"You're a bit weird, mate." I used to say to him,
"Something's going to come of
this, I just know." My first video,
I think, is 2012. <i> They was Forza drift
drift videos.</i> <i> Moving into FIFA '13 was when
it really hit off,</i> and that was because I'd bumped
into other creators. Ethan, again, was someone
who didn't show his face
at the start. Showing your face for
the first time on the internet, which I was extremely
scared about, I thought I was a big wreck.
I was a fat, ugly mess. It was just the voice,
and then he'd done
a grand reveal. First time doing a vlog
on this channel.
Hope you're all excited. Yeah! Whoo-hoo! He used to film absolutely
non-stop, 24/7. Autopilot, wake up.
One video, bang. Edit it,
put it out, have some lunch. - Edit another video, bang.
- Just went stratospheric once
they created the Sidemen. Behzinga:<i> When my channel
started gaining success,</i> 100,000 subscribers
was absolutely mind-boggling. And you think, "Oh, I've got
this many views this day. I've got this many
subscribers this day,"
and it's like, "Oh, my God." Everything good's happening.
We're growing, growing, growing. Ruth:<i> Even to this day,
it's still mind-blowing</i> <i> with all their
Sidemen books to sign
and people screaming his name.</i> Behzinga:<i> I don't think any of
us realized the sheer size</i> of a community you can grow
by being yourself
on the internet. Ruth:<i> The boys
have become his family.</i> We've been through
so much together. I don't know what my life would
have been like without them. A lot of people say,
"How long do you see
yourself doing this?" But I started from a place
of just wanting to do it
as a passion. I'll probably still be
knocking a video out every
now and then when I'm 30. All right, tell me,
how's the training going,
big man? We're doing good, mate.
We're getting the road miles in. We hit eight yesterday,
and we chocked in
a couple before that. So I'm probably
about 15 this week. That's great,
but it's not even a marathon
in the last ten weeks and you have to do it
in one sitting. So we need to up the levels,
so I'm gonna run with you. - I'm up for that.
- But I'm not doing
the marathon. I'm not doing
the half marathon. I think you should do
a half marathon. - But what will you do?
- I have an idea. Right, Vik,
why are we on a roof, and why
are there two treadmills? Right, okay.
You're gonna do a marathon. That's gonna be outside
in nature's elements. - Okay.
- So you're going for
the four-hour marathon. This is a half marathon.
Two hours, 120 minutes. That means we need you
at around nine minutes a mile. However, I'm just doing
the first mile. So we thought
we would bring along a whole
host of other amazing people, and they'll each do a mile
with you, so you have some
company in your training. - Okay.
- They'll be coming along
one after the next. So I'm gonna have
13 different friends. - Yes, you are.
- Amazing. All right.
Let's do it. So, joining you today, Ethan, we have Jaackmaate,
Bambino Becky. <i> We have teenage cancer
survivor Finlay Torkington.</i> Yes. Excited.
Been waiting to train with him. - Vik:<i> We also
have Elz the Witch. </i>
- Behzinga:<i> Oh, my God.</i> Vik:<i> Your footballing pals
from Thame's Ironworks.</i> Behzinga:<i>
Yes! The boys!</i> Vik:<i> We also have
Layla Anna Lee</i> <i> and "Towie's" star Diags.</i> Unreal. I can't believe it. Vik:<i> Next up, we have
the real brains behind
the Behzinga channel,</i> - Charlie Donald.
- Oh, no. I don't want
to run with him. - Vik:<i>
We also have Gabriel Sey. </i>
-<i> I like him.</i> Vik:<i> Olympic gold medalist
Christine Ohuruogu.</i> - Behzinga:<i>
Solid. Oh, lovely! </i>
-<i> And Julia Hardy.</i> Vik:<i> We also have five times
freestyle football</i> <i> world champion,
you know who it is.</i> - Behzinga: <i>
It's Andrew Henderson. </i>
- Vik:<i> It is indeed.</i> <i> And the personal trainer
that was there
at the start of it all,</i> - Dida.
- Decent. Oh, boy. All right,
it's time to get started. Time to get on the treadmills.
And I'm gonna thrash
all of you guys. - Okay. We'll see, we'll see.
- Smoke you all. Smoked. - Oh, fresh start, Vik.
- All right, your first mile.
What pace are we doing? It's a nine-minute mile,
6.7 miles an hour. I've got the timer on.
I've got the pacer on. And this will be it, lads.
Welcome to the club,
the running club. - Ethan's running club.
- E.P., Ethan Payne. - Yeah. E.P.'s running gang.
- Running gang. We found our pace now.
I can chug along for as long
as you want me to now. All right, there we go.
There's my mile done. I'll send in
your next companion. Thank you, boy.
See you in a bit. Do you want to know a secret? - I can't run.
- You can't run? - Let's smash this thing.
Come on, let's go.
- All right, then. So you're running for
Teenage Cancer Trust? - Yes. I've got
the wristband on.
- How come you chose them? My family has a history of
cancer and stuff like that. So, it just seemed like
the perfect fit. ( coughing )
So, I think I possibly
could be the weak link. You reckon? Mate, I don't want to say it,
but I'd like to say
I'm fit as a fiddle. - They want me to get
in your head, mate.
- Wow, okay. 'Cause all the other guys
have been encouraging you, but I'm not having any of that,
mate. I'm here to win. Okay, right.
Oh, mate, this is awful.
I'm running heavy. Those coffees
have not sat well. This poo is ever-urging now. - Oh, mate.
- We're at DEFCON 5. It's here.
I think it might be go-time. That's what I do to people,
get in his head. I really thought I'd be able
to do it without shitting. All right, bang.
I'm gonna go to the toilet. Thank you for coming. I literally made him
shit himself. - Absolute bottler.
- ( bleep ) shambles. Where's Ethan? I'm not doing
the second half on my own. - Hear me? Come on!
- He's gotta show up.
Are we taking breaks? - Is that what this
is going to be like?
- ( bleep ) Come on! - Ethan?
- Yes! This is not on, man. It's all good, mate. Ready.
We're back. We're back. How seriously is this
being taken? It's a minor blip.
These things happen. All right, let's go. You're putting me to shame! ( bleep ) no difference, mate. He set his goals
really, really high,
and he's done amazingly. I think the best thing is
that I've seen with you,
you're just so inspiring. - Like, to see
where you've come from...
- Thank you. ..and where you're going,
I think you really
will inspire other people. - Thank you very much.
- So I'm gonna do a marathon
one day. You've inspired me. - Yeah? Okay.
- Yep. That means so much to me. He's come out here
doing kick-ups. - Let's see if I can get
around the world.
- Go on. Oh! He's doing around the world.
Quite funny. When I heard about your story
and you wanted to get involved, it really inspired me as well
because obviously we're both
running for the same cause, - you've been
through it yourself.
- Yeah, exactly. You've got the mindset
and everything it takes
to push yourself and get through literally
anything the world
throws at you. The main thing was
just not overthinking it and just thinking about
getting across the line. So I guess it is kind of
like the marathon. Charlie:<i> I think he's
in a good place right now.</i> <i> He's just battling through it,
just going hard.</i> He's got a good mindset
on him as well, especially coming up to this,
so I'm proud of him. Mate, I remember our sessions.
You've lost how much weight? - Three and a half stone.
- Three and a half stone, man.
That's crazy. From 17 and a half,
and this man helped me start. - Let's do it, my guy.
- Let's do it. - Go team!
- Go on! Mate,
you are breezing it. Mate, I'm so happy. We're gonna do it under two.
Gonna do it under two! I'm gonna finish under two! ( bleep ) Come on! 0.3K. - Last little bit then.
- Yeah. - You're all done?
- 0.02. - 0.01!
- Go on! - Done!
- Yeah, boy. One hour, 56.33. - Bring it in, pal.
- Oh, thank you. - Thank you very much.
- My guy. I'm gonna save that.
21.1. Boom. Dida:<i>
His conditioning is amazing.</i> <i> I mean, he's an athlete now,
so that's the difference.</i> <i> When we first started,
he was overweight, unhealthy,
and we changed that.</i> <i> And then once
we'd broken the ice,</i> <i> he just broke down
every barrier that
was in front of him.</i> <i> So I'm very proud of him
from where he came
to where he is now.</i> You must stay at home. People will have already
been carrying the virus. -<i> The number of cases... </i>
-<i> This virus...</i> - Restrict the spread.
- We are the NHS. We are... -<i> Wash your hands. </i>
- Many lives will be lost. The world's crumbling
in front of our very own eyes. I've just had
my wisdom teeth out
this side of my mouth. - Whoa, look at that big boy.
- And I'm on a soft diet. I went down to Tesco's,
and there's absolutely nothing
there that I can even eat. It really is just carnage. I've got pot noodle.
I managed to find pot noodle. The first months,
I struggled quite a lot. It's just being knocked out
of a pattern that you're
working toward so much, and you-- it's really hard
to find motivation
doing nothing. <i> Especially when I enjoyed
my training program</i> <i> where I'd go to the gym
or going out on a run.</i> <i> Having that just stripped away
from you is difficult,</i> <i> and then just being
stuck inside.</i> Boris did a speech
and he's made a Nando scale
out of COVID alert. I feel that you can get
quite sick of your mates if you're with them 24 hours,
seven days a week. Like, I know you want
to kick my head in, but you also know
I want to kick your
head in sometimes. - I want to cave his head in.
- It was quite difficult.
I didn't like it. - What's happened, mate?
- The London marathon's been
postponed due to coronavirus. I mean, I was sort of--
I sort of knew this
was gonna happen, but it's been
postponed to Sunday,
the fourth of October. - Now what do you do?
- The marathon being cancelled will be very annoying to him. Virus is ruining the world. Coronavirus.
Absolutely ruining the world. He's a better man than me
'cause it would just
piss me off. I would have cancelled
this whole thing. I'd say sack it off.
I'm not-- I'm not doing that. He is gutted that the marathon
isn't gonna happen the way
he wanted it to happen. I always had the hope,
but it was just up in the air. And I hate things
being up in the air. <i> I like knowing
exactly what I'm doing,
so it was mayhem.</i> <i> Maybe the universe
is saying you ain't doing
London Marathon this year.</i> In lockdown, I got fat.
Last week, I was 86.3 kilos,
which is a record high. 'Cause there's nothing to do
apart from eat. It tore my training regime
to tatters. Oh, look. There's people
down there doing it. TBJZL:<i>
I'm sure he'll still keep
working on himself</i> <i> and improving himself and
waiting for another opportunity</i> <i> to prove that he has improved.</i> Pow. Lean in lockdown. The blackboard always
comes in handy. Whenever I have something
on this blackboard, I feel a lot better. Anyway, got formulas now on how to work out
by cutting calories
and stuff like that. So, last week
we started at 84.6kg. I'm now 83 and a half,
so that's already a kilogram
drop in a week. Just kind of hard to find
the motivation to push yourself, but I feel like this is
a nice kickstart to get myself back
motivated again. <i> Had a video call
with Eddie Hall.</i> - Ethan, there you are.
- Yes, how are you? - I'm good, sir. How are you?
- Better now after logging in
and talking to you. - Oh, good to hear.
- I haven't had anyone
that's personally been affected by
the actual virus or anything, so hearing someone
share his experiences with me
was quite something. My grandma, um,
suffered with dementia
very badly. I actually went to her myself.
She kept begging for me to go in and have a coffee and a biscuit,
and I couldn't. And, uh, yesterday,
we found her dead
in the back garden. That was a real tough thing
for me to sort of digest that. Yeah, losing--
losing my grandma during this has just been really--
it's really tough. But, ahem, life goes on,
as they say. Just everything that you've
been through already, and then that is--
it absolutely blowed my mind. It put things
into perspective, especially
when I would wake up and for a week feel like
I'm having a crap time because of everything
that the world's going
through or whatever. So it was really nice to have
a chat with someone and just round things off
and take a step back. I think people also
are starting to become
a little bit more aware of the mental health side
of things, and I feel like you've probably
got a lot to say on that. Yeah, 100%.
Mental health is something that I've actually
struggled with since I was
a very young teenager. You know, treated for that
with all sorts of medications and that led to depression. Got myself in a very quite dark,
horrible place. And you know what
the hardest thing was? Not having anyone
to talk to. In lockdown,
a lot of people have become a lot more aware
of mental health and the issues
that it presents. Men don't really talk about
mental health issues. We don't really cover
and of those topics. Even us as a friend group,
we rarely ever touch on it, unless someone's really, like,
visibly down in a bad place. Behzinga:<i>
Just started my twenties,
'cause that's where I was</i> <i> intoxicated and doing
nothing with my life.</i> I felt like I was just
existing in a shell. I was intoxicated
seven days out of seven. I remember living
in the flat underneath him <i> and used to go up.</i> <i> He would be half a bottle
of J.D. in.</i> <i> He would be smoking
his lungs away.</i> TBJZL:<i>
He was turning to alcohol</i> to deal with all his feelings,
all his emotions. I think it was
a coping mechanism. Behzinga:<i> And just going through
a lot of battles in your head</i> <i> where you think,
"I'm not good enough.</i> <i> I don't really think
I'm applying myself.</i> I don't think
I'm going to go anywhere.
My relationships aren't great. <i> My friends don't know
anything about it."</i> <i> And you're sort of hidden
and you're trapped
in your own mind.</i> Ruth:<i> That side of him
is his worst trait,</i> that he wants everybody
to think he is Behzinga, "And I'm happy,
and I'm famous for my laugh," so I've got to put that persona
on when sometimes it's quite hard
behind the scenes. I remember telling him
he needs to stop the drinking. "Stop drinking so much.
You're drinking way too much." As a close friend of him,
it's really scary to see
someone in that state because you want to help them
as much as you can, but you don't want
to push too much that they-- they end up
going away from you. I didn't want
to be here anymore. I didn't
want to be here anymore. Because I felt like
I wasn't good enough. I felt like I was letting
everyone down. I felt like I was just a burden
to absolutely everyone. I felt like I was
the shit heap that everyone
was dragging along. It was possibly one
of the most heartbreaking
things to see is to see a friend go through
such troubles and there's nothing really
that you can do apart from be there for them. Ruth:<i>
He was saying quite a few
worrying things.</i> <i> He can't go on and it
was all getting too much.</i> <i> The pressure was too much
and he was struggling.</i> I think when you end up
going down that rabbit hole, you end up just talking yourself
into stupid things. TBJZL:<i> And I remember
Ethan's girlfriend at the time</i> <i> knocking on my flat door
and she was crying.</i> I was like,
"Yo, what's going on?
What's going on?" This is at, like,
4 AM in the morning. And she's telling me that
Ethan's not in a good state
and he's gone out. Behzinga:<i> I was very drunk,
and I end up getting
in the car.</i> And I left the flat
with no intention of going
back to the flat. Zerkaa:<i> I didn't know he felt
that bad that he felt
that he had to even</i> - end his life
or anything like that.
- I was panicking. - I didn't know what to do.
- Behzinga:<i> In your head,</i> <i> you've now whittled yourself
down to meaning nothing.</i> <i> You don't really
find any reason to be
knocking about anymore.</i> <i> And that's where
I'd ended up at, like,
3:00 in the morning.</i> And I'd sort of convinced myself
that now was the perfect time
to just make myself disappear. Thankfully, in the end,
Ethan got in contact with people and he let them know
that he was safe
and he was coming home. It's weird how the world works,
but I just got to a point and I sort of pulled the car
over and it just hit me. And I was like,
"What are you doing, mate?" That was a very,
very scary period for me. 'Cause I didn't know
if I was gonna see
my friend again, really. He's having, like,
a mental breakdown, and he just, like,
collapsed into my arms
and was just crying. I love my friends so much. Yeah, I will cry, and I have done before. I love my friends. Fitness, running,
of course it saved his life.
Definitely. Dida:<i> The fitness journey
that he's recently been on</i> <i> and the transformation
he's been on</i> has helped him times ten to where he is now
in a happier place. Behzinga: <i> And you can think
about absolutely nothing</i> apart from my heart's
beating this fast and my feet
are going like this. - And that's quite therapeutic.
- He would have just gone
down this dark path. I mean, it could have just got
worse and worse and worse. <i> And maybe he wouldn't have
got out of the car.</i> TBJZL:<i> The training
is definitely something
he's taking seriously.</i> - Going for runs every day.
- He is very passionate
about going to the gym and his fitness
and his health overall. TBJZL:<i> And not just running
for the sake of running,</i> <i> really trying to improve
himself, trying to learn how
to pace himself.</i> Behzinga:<i> It's a little bit
a learning curve, but there's
also benefits from it.</i> It just kickstarts
everything again. Right, so,
I just got a message
from Master Wong, and he told me to meet him
at the London Stadium which is here in
the background. I've watched
a few of his videos. - ( grunting )
- ( indistinct babbling ) I'm not really sure
what to expect, but I don't have any idea
what's going to be in that stadium
waiting for me. Oh, my God.
What are we doing?
I'm very confused. I'm very, very confused
by what we're going
to be doing here. Hello, Behzinga.
It's Michail Antonio. Welcome to the London Stadium,
home of the Hammers. Normally, my feet are on fire
in the stadium, but tonight it's your turn. Tonight the cameras
are all on you. So do this and you'll be ready
to take on the marathon - Good luck.
- Oh, that's good. I'm gathering an idea now
of what we're going
to be doing here. I'm going to walk on that,
aren't I? I am Master Wong, a true master
of mind over matter training. You have come a long way
on your marathon journey. Now you only need to travel
a short distance over burning hot coal. This fire is over
1,000 degree. This challenge will give you
the inner strength to combat anything
that holding you back. Remember, fire walk must employ
mind over matter. Behzinga:<i>
I felt my heart rate jump
because not many people have</i> <i>or will walk across hot coals,
and it takes a lot of cajones</i> to get across
a burning bed of coals. - You ready?
-<i> The younger me
would definitely</i> <i> never have done this.</i> <i> The more life experiences
you go through,</i> <i> whether they're bad or good,
they mature your mind.</i> <i> And that's why
I've sort of got to this
point now where</i> <i> I feel ready to chuck myself
into whatever comes up.</i> Ready. I'm so proud of myself. You complete
your inner strength challenge. Now you're ready
for your marathon. Holy shit. Oh, that's--
I'm a bit emotional. - ( bleep )
- How do you feel? I didn't even ( bleep )
feel a thing, you lot. - God.
- Good man. This is the first time
I feel like I'm finally
ready to do something. I've never felt this ready
to do anything in my life. And, um, yeah, it's cool. It's cool. I just walked over coals. <i> 25 now. Growing up,</i> <i> feel like I've been through
my fair share of shite.</i> <i> And it's the first time
I feel happy with where I'm at
heading into the future.</i> <i> I think that's what
hit me again.</i> When I signed up
to do the marathon,
that was already something quite extreme in itself
considering I had never
run a 5k before. <i> And then along the way,
we've run a half
with all my friends.</i> <i> We've done the truck pulling,</i> <i> we've done
walking across coals.</i> <i> I think this challenge
has just given me</i> <i> that belief
that once I say go,</i> <i> I'm gonna do it.
I'm gonna finish it.</i> <i> I've never been more ready
for something in my life.</i> So I've been at home now for,
I think, the last two weeks because I've felt
a little bit ill. In the current climate
of how things are, I decided to take
a COVID home test. Oh, boy. Test name:
COVID-19, positive. He'd been training so much
and he was so ready for it. I worry about him
getting puffed out. - Come on, let's go!
- Behzinga:<i> Having a positive
COVID test</i> <i> this close to the marathon
changes everything.</i>
