Training Australia's Dangerous Magpies

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are you going now if you aren't Australian you probably don't know who this guy is but for Aziz no other animal strikes fear into the heart quite like the magpie the magpie is a very intelligent bird so intelligent it has always beat me in Scrabble it is also very observant and watches all the horrible things us humans do throughout the year and then in September the cunning magpie decides it's had enough of our shit and it's gonna get revenge it's normally a sure sign at spring has well and truly sprung Magpies swooping pedestrians and bike riders on the streets of Sydney it's revenge is so brutal that it makes primetime news no other animal systematically attacks and torments people like the magpie it doesn't matter whether you are a 90 year old woman returning home from your weekly bingo game or a schoolboy walking home the magpie will chase you for a kilometre shit on your new shirt and make sure you don't leave your house until October no what I kind of respect it's temper if more animals behave like the vengeful magpie the world would probably be a better place to my surprise a month before September I noticed that we had a friendly gang of Magpies hanging around in our yard and I conceived a wild idea if I could befriend the Magpies before they turn their backs on me or even train them then I could avoid a month of fear and embarrassment and I might be able to harness their infamy if everyone fears the magpie and I control the Magpies then everyone would fear me now I don't really have the greatest plan but I reckon if i seduce the magpie with a wide range of bread and I ring this Bell every time it eats I can get it to associate this annoying noise with myself food and happiness I already know it works on humans at first it was tough the Magpies didn't really want anything to do with me or the Bell but when I persisted I noticed that one of them this little maverick let's call him Zuko was pretty comfortable so I figured I would target him with the sourdough bread at first Zuko was really scared of me in the Bell and really didn't want to get in reach of me or eat his bread anywhere near me but after trying a couple of times he was more comfortable and started to trust me a bit more every morning you'll just be chilling out waiting outside the door for his feed although his mates what's call him the t-birds still didn't trust me I really wish I could speak bird although he is probably telling me to stop fucking ringing this Bell eventually Zuko started hanging around a lot more and one of his mates started to trust me as well and I reckon I had got them to associate me with bread but I wasn't sure about the Bell they really stayed too still hated wait guys chill out I'll give you all bread okay I felt a bit bad about creating a bit of conflict in the group and that I remembered that Goods word must have spread around that some idiot was giving out free bread and some other boys decided to crash the party I have no idea why the Magpies just run away from the small lorikeets they would definitely beat them in a fight well then maybe it's because they hop around like freaks or maybe the hierarchy of beauty applies to the animal kingdom as well and they just make room for the prettier animals regardless they all seem to hate the Bell eventually I had every bird in the neighbourhood hanging around in my yard chilling around for a free feed and the lorikeets was still the top dogs and the Magpies had to resort to some sneaky tactics aided by myself to get some food do it and even though I had enough bread for all the birds an all-out gang war broke out with my love and bread at the center more birds rocked up and there was an obvious pecking order in the bird Kingdom in which the Magpies were at the bottom followed by the beautiful bird dama lorikeets who flashed their colours in order to get a free feed then the kookaburra it gets on everyone's good side by laughing at everything you have to say hey what are you laughing about and finally the giant fucking king of the birds the crested cockatoo seems as though the magpie had lost the fight for bread but I realized they had one thing on their side their intelligence out of all the birds that are in my yard they were the only bird that learned that me ringing this annoying Bell meant the dinner was served and they were first to eat every single time and you know I never managed to train them to attack people or to ride them like a scene from Lord of the Rings but I did learn a couple of things firstly you really don't need a vacuum cleaner when you have a magpie around that dude and I like you're cool and all but I really don't think you should be in my house the other you are eating the scraps on the floor this is a great idea and the reason they sweep everybody is because he give all your fucking bread to the pretty birds you know I can't mine Magpies nice and full and they didn't swoop me once in the month of September if you liked that video subscribe and share it around you know you finally have an excuse to ring up that auntie you haven't spoken to in three years you can say like hey there's there's this guy who made a video on the internet with birds and you know you two will be best friends again

Info

Channel: I did a thing

Views: 440,015

Rating: 4.9667902 out of 5

Keywords: magpie, magpie attack, training magpie, friendly magpies, australian magpie, australian magpie attack, dangerous australian animals, australian birds, magpie call, magpie singing, training birds, magpie swooping, friendly birds, animals playing, animals playing together, training wild animals, cute magpie, cute birds, pet magpie, pet bird, cute animals, training pets, dangerous animals, dangerous animals in australia, how to train birds

Id: EXYf2DTOsvI

Channel Id: undefined

Length: 7min 37sec (457 seconds)

Published: Wed Sep 26 2018

Reddit Comments

What a chill dude. I could listen to this for hours

👍︎︎ 58 👤︎︎ u/iFlameLife 📅︎︎ Mar 10 2019 🗫︎ replies

Such beautiful big birds in Australia, most of the birds around my parts consist of sparrows, black birds, chickadees, and pigeons. We do have magpies but their tails are much longer.

👍︎︎ 23 👤︎︎ u/MrGuttFeeling 📅︎︎ Mar 10 2019 🗫︎ replies

Hmm just be careful, my parents did this years ago and it was all fun and games until one day I came downstairs to them inside my house. Someone had left the door open just enough for them to squeeze through, and they knew what kind of goodies came out of that door every morning. Anyway long story short, magpies that are inside your house are waaay bigger than the ones outside, they also freak out, shit everywhere, and are really hard to get out.

Edit: now I see they did come in, dunno why our birds were panicking, but we did have budgies in a cage inside so maybe it was that

👍︎︎ 72 👤︎︎ u/eznai68 📅︎︎ Mar 10 2019 🗫︎ replies

Don't feed birds bread, it can mess them up: https://www.healthywildlife.com.au/feeding-magpies/#/

👍︎︎ 58 👤︎︎ u/ebrandsberg 📅︎︎ Mar 10 2019 🗫︎ replies

You should write a paper about bird hierarchies! Fascinating stuff.

👍︎︎ 6 👤︎︎ u/twistedskew404 📅︎︎ Mar 10 2019 🗫︎ replies

People always flip out about bugs in Australia, but the birds are the true enemy. I had no idea about it when i moved to Brisbane, and I could not figure out why I kept getting smacked while cycling. To make things worse, the crows sound awful and would caw at day-break (4:30 am).

👍︎︎ 6 👤︎︎ u/loafydood 📅︎︎ Mar 10 2019 🗫︎ replies

"Pretty tasty!"

👍︎︎ 2 👤︎︎ u/bacera 📅︎︎ Mar 10 2019 🗫︎ replies

Once magpies think you are a threat, they remember you for LIFE. If you get swooped once, they will do it over and over. Generally I just say hello to them and keep on walking. If you want to "make friends" you feed them minced meat. A lot of people feed birds bread (I don't know why) but most like live hunting.

👍︎︎ 2 👤︎︎ u/micmelb 📅︎︎ Mar 10 2019 🗫︎ replies

It's "I did a thing" ! Pretty funny channel, you should watch his video about making steel-toed Crocs.

👍︎︎ 2 👤︎︎ u/Kuroyama 📅︎︎ Mar 11 2019 🗫︎ replies