Tomorrowland Ruined My Life And Dreams

so my number-one fandom is actually theme parks unless that's actually a fandom like what did we call things that we liked before we invented orgs fandom so that's why you're getting a super topical review of Tomorrowland in 2017 because this is a movie that I feel very strongly about and I'm going to give this video a really aggressive title so you probably know that those aren't positive feelings I know this movie was a huge financial flop because people were just like wow I didn't like it that much whatever but this was actually the movie I was looking forward to the most in 2015 and the new Star Wars was coming out in 2015 so for context so instead of letting this film fail with dignity and be forgotten by most people I'm going to cruelly drag it back into consciousness and dissect all the reasons that I think it didn't work because honestly if anyone was going to like Tomorrowland it would have been me and I did not like it oh and I superficially organize my points into a numbered list because when you make a really long video you need to have like a list for people to hold their interest I thought of seven things for my list number one the first ten minutes are like part of a completely different and much better movie so the movie opens with a flashback to George Clooney's childhood in 1964 he's a little boy who's like 10 years old and he lives on a farm and he built a rocket pack out of like spare lawnmower parts or something because he believes in innovation and inspiration so he takes his rocket pack to the New York World's Fair to show it off and he goes to this inventors exhibition and he shows his rocket pack to Hugh Laurie who's an evil I mean crabby scientist we don't know he's evil yet it's very subtle he also makes friends of the little robot girl named Athena who's his age and then he goes through a portal that's hidden inside it's a small world that takes into this futuristic city called Tomorrowland where all these inventors live in harmony and meikle musical future-tech and I'm like wow this is great sign me up and then the movie is not actually about the now we're following a modern teenager named Casey she's like smart but she's a rebel and she finds an artifact from Tomorrowland so the movie is like Casey is trying to get to Tomorrowland so this is a looking for clues movie looking for clues and going on a trip movie those movies are boring later in the film you get three brief glimpses and flashbacks of Tomorrowland in its heyday like all these smart little children running around in these 1960 space cadet uniforms that look like little tennis outfit running around this dazzling futuristic landscape like making adventures and making friends and it's like this retro futuristic Hogwarts that's a really cool movie it's cool and cheesy and timeless it sounds like it as franchise potential to me but that's not the movie that we got we got like national treasure but less focused number two the main character I have no hate for this actress I'm sure she can be really great and stuff but she just feels really miscast here I mean the same here she played an adult romantic lead in the Nicholas Sparks movie she's cast here is like a starry-eyed teenager in high school I think Casey's supposed to be like a 16 year old and the actress is obviously a grown woman so it's just really weird like watching her go around like you look mr. Clooney I'm definitely not 25 years old all of her lines are very big and exaggerated does she have a lot of stage acting experience is she just directed this way nobody else in the movies acting like this including the actual children it's even funnier because they put her in like the baseball cap the whole movie and all these loose layers of baggy clothing to try to make her look younger and it's just really awkward number three the chase sequences so a whole lot of this movie is just chase sequences Casey goes to a comic store to try to find out about the pin and she gets chased by a robot it's weird because it's the most slap sticking moment in the movie not in like a funny way but like there's cartoon sound effect it doesn't really feel like the whole rest of the movie then there's this little bit of downtime and exposition benkei he meets up with George Clooney oh no oh they get chased by robot they got to get in the teleportation thing and teleport away and then they arrive there at the Eiffel Tower oh man they're getting chased by robots they gotta take off in a rocket ship those last two consecutive chase scenes are so weird because they really do happen like back-to-back and they're both like the main characters have to get into a futuristic vehicle that might not work right so they're scared and they got to get in an escape robots by going to another location so why was it the first futuristic vehicle just the spaceship to Tomorrowland like story-wise why did they go to Paris first like hey we got this secret inventor Society called plus ultra and this weird connection to Walt Disney and that all ties into the futuristic city somehow and we don't really know how the clearly evil Hugh Laurie ended up running things but that's okay this is a good use of our screen time number four a perversion of everything that I love not to be dramatic or anything it's really subtle and stuff but I love theme parks and especially vintage theme parks and extinct theme park attraction I like the level of showmanship that goes into them but also that like level of inherent transience for any theme park experience for any given person I mean if you look at all the stuff that's changed over the years a lot of attractions and even whole theme parks just exist in people's memories and imaginations like on this other plane of existence kind of like Tomorrowland in the movie anyway I hear about this movie and I'm like what Brad Bird I love Brad Bird he's tying sci-fi elements into the history of Disneyland that sounds awesome oh my god a recreation of the 1964 New York World's Fair in beautiful Living Color oh my god they're playing it's a great big beautiful tomorrow whoo the little grass dress looks like the Epcot orb I still don't know if that was actually the intent but that's what it looks like to me Oh check it out those are real cast members operating it's a small world but they're in the vintage versions of the costume oh wait that's over we left the World's Fair hey wait it's the retro future robots and rocket pack oh wait that's over 2,000 child actors those are like really hard to find I love kid adventure movies oh the main character is this adult woman it's the guy from key & peele one of my favorite comedy shows so he's only in it for a second and they didn't give him anything very funny to do so I feel like you can't bring up Tomorrowland without mentioning that the movie was marketed with this alternate reality game I don't actually know if a lot of people know this so they sent out a series of clues to Disney fans to lead them on like a treasure hunt that would help them find out stuff about the optimist society which is the secret Club of inventors in the movie like you went to the carousel where Walt Disney took his kids and had the idea for Disneyland and if you've got on the right horse and wrapped this seat belt around the pole it would like form letters that spelled out a code word you would go to the diner where Walt always had lunch when he was working at the studios and if you ordered Walt's favorite chili the waitress would bring you like a can and if you opened it instead of chili it had all these secret documents in it you went to the Disneyland train station and it was playing out a secret message in Morse code instead of the opening day speech the idea that the visionary minds responsible for creating Disneyland we're also working on secret projects behind the scenes is like a pretty compelling backdrop for a sci-fi story but oh that's not really in the movie George Clooney and Casey kind of paused in this secret room in the Eiffel Tower and George Clooney's like there was a secret society of visionaries trying to make the world a better place a long time ago and Casey's like willikers mr. Clooney's he's like oh that's fascinating tell me more but then whoops the bad guys show up time for another chase sequence it's weird that the marketing was so focused on Walt Disney and Disneyland when that was so sidelined in the movie like if you're not going to go full hog with that why mention it at all the World's Fair is there but like very briefly and kind of in consequentially oh oh and the robots are called audio animatronics which I'm going to go on like a mini rant here I'm going to get comfortable for my long rant so not all robots at Disney parks are called audio-animatronic audio-animatronic was a phrase that was invented by Walt Disney for his later models of row wot's which used a new technology that let him sync up their movements to pre-recorded audio track so audio-animatronic was basically like a programmable showman robot like the ones in Pirates of the Caribbean that were able to lip-sync to dialogue or the birds in the Tiki room that can perform a whole musical show like the older robots in Jungle Cruise just perform repetitive movement cycles that aren't synced up to anything so those are not called audio animatronics if a robot thinks for itself and interacts with its environment there's also a different word in imaginary for that and I think it's a ton of Matrona so we're the robots in Tomorrowland invented by Walt Disney because if they weren't they wouldn't be called audio animatronics because that's a trademark phrase and if they were they still wouldn't be called that did they all used to perform in a theme park and they got an upgrade that would actually be cool and creepy but that's not the case basically what I'm saying is they just called them audio animatronics because it's a familiar phrase if the scene appointed to the robot and when those are robots then nothing would be lost but it was decided in writing that if they called them audio animatronics the Disney fans would go I know what audio animatronics are they're not those but it's familiar to me sighs that awkward Hugh Laurie monologue so you remember all those chase scenes where they got to get away from robot well the main villain is Hugh Laurie you saw him in the first 10 minutes acting obviously evil well he's back I know you don't know a lot about him but he's back and he's wearing a crazy space jacket so he's got this big monologue about how people these days just want to watch dystopian movies and I guess that's because mankind is evil something so like if somebody hands you the platform to make a movie you should just make the kind of movie that you want to make not a movie that's bad and then at the end Hugh Laurie delivers a dramatic monologue about the kind of movie you want to make the best part is that Hugh Laurie doesn't even make sense at the beginning he discourages young Frank Walker from making his rocket pack because there's no utility to it like what does it do how does it help humanity inventions have to help humanity they can't just be there to inspire creativity and optimism but she's telling Frank Walker this at the 1964 New York World's Fair the World's Fair where Walt Disney's crown jewel exhibit was let's all go climb in the convertible and look at my fantastical robot dinosaur and I know that happened in this universe because small world exists I know that because Hugh Laurie goes on it's a small world directly after talking to Frank Walker hey kid we can't just make inventions because they're cool and fun now if you'll excuse me I have to go on a whimsical boat ride through a pageant of living dolls what this whole speech makes me think of is Pirates of the Caribbean you know when they made Pirates of the Caribbean pirates weren't like a thing they were kind of like this antiquated concept and then Pirates of the Caribbean was a huge success which made pirates a big pop-culture gold mine again it turns out the way to get a culture interested in pirates is to just make a good movie about pirates you know that scene in Pirates of the Caribbean where they're about to break the curse and Captain Barbossa is standing on that big pile of gold and he's like making a rousing speech to his men what if instead Captain Barbossa just kind of shambled up onto that gold pile and started griping about how nobody likes pirates anymore yarr kids these days just want to watch spider-man movies that'd be why we aren't actually pirates and are just pretending to be his a hostile social climate for the likes of a pirate er and then they all take off their pirate costume and just go home by walking on land number six that jerk Hugh Laurie is wrong about me the whole ending to the movie is so frustrating because guess what Hugh Laurie I did want to see an optimistic old-fashioned retro future movie I am also charmed by that era where people just made pointless stupid inventions to make them feel happy and excited about the future like robot Butler's and underwater cities and stuff and that's why I bought a ticket to a movie called Tomorrowland the big twist in the movie is Casey's trying to get to Tomorrowland and when she finally does it's just a barren wasteland with Hugh Laurie and a crazy space jacket and all that stuff she was being shown is this amazing city doesn't exist anymore and it's just ads and I'm like I'm Casey I got shown all these cool ads for an awesome movie and I get here and it's just Hugh Laurie in a crazy space jacket this movie ends with a montage of a bunch of kid visionaries getting summoned to a new Tomorrowland to make an amazing future together so it's setting up the sequel that does find a lot cooler but unfortunately this movie was lame and it tanked and now a sequel is never going to get made and it probably also effectively killed that Space Mountain movie they were thinking about making and hey look what I have I sweat shirt no I have a Tomorrowland pen you know how long it took me to get this pin like three months while the movie was tanking at the box office these things were selling like hotcakes like they get them in stock and they would immediately sell out and they kept making them for like a year because they kept selling people were like proudly wearing them around and stuff and it's not because this movie has fans like it obviously didn't it's because people liked the idea of the movie and they wanted to like it so the interest was there Tomorrowland just didn't deliver oh my god you guys look what just arrived speak of the devil right sorry to keep earth it's just a stack like should I remove one no okay bring it in the homestretch number 7 what is the moral of this movie anyway so the Hugh Laurie monologue isn't the only preachy moment in the movie actually like a lot of it is very preachy if the moral of the movie was just make more retro futuristic movies because they're really neato that would be fine I'd be like yeah that's immoral I can get behind early on in the movie they have Casey tell that story of the two wolves like camp counselors say it's a Native American story but I don't know if that's true so it's the story where there's two wolves fighting inside of you and one is despair and one is hope and which one wins the one fee and they keep repeating this story through the whole movie and there's this montage at the beginning where Casey is at school all the teachers are totally bumming her out because they're talking about nuclear war and global warming and dystopian literature Kasich Eastwood raising her hand and they're not calling honor and a teacher finally calls on her and she's very smugly like well how do we fix it the teacher just like golf at her open mouthed like a buffoon and he's like oh she's like I get that things are bad but what are we doing to fix it and it's treated like this big mic drop moment the teacher just stares dumbfounded he has no answer but I'm like no the thing Casey said wasn't a rebuttal to the lecture she was just stating the super obvious point to it the teacher didn't just bring up the polar ice caps melting because he thinks that's cool and awesome to look at you don't study 1984 to remind you that things are already bad the whole point of dystopian literature is to encourage positive change to stop it from happening Hugh Laurie says that people love dystopian fiction because it encourages them to be lazy because they're like ah the world's bad anyway it's fine like what did you Lauri just read the dust jacket on his copy of 1984 because I'm pretty sure the moral of that book wasn't like go on I want to see where they're going with this when we first meet Casey there's this whole metaphor that totally undermines the entire message in the movie NASA wants to tear down their old rocket launch towers because there's no money going into rocket launches anymore so Casey gets in and she damages all the tractors and cranes so that they won't be able to do that as quickly well guess what Casey even if the towers stay up they're still not launching rockets are they kind of like you're just slapping a bandaid on a larger more complex issue to make yourself feel good in the moment yeah I get it Casey the lack of interest in the space program is bad but what are we doing to fix it the big stakes at the end of the movie are that George Clooney has this big future scene device and it foretold a dystopian future that's going to happen in like 2 months and glimpses of a better future only become possible when Casey feels optimism that the future can be good again so it's like hey let's not talk about the bad stuff that's going to happen because if we pretend like everything's fine and make some robot Butler's and some rocket packs and everything will turn out great our optimism makes itself but like wait a second last I checked that wasn't finding a solution either so in one corner you've got this straw man whose catastrophizing and planning for the world to end and like happy about it resigned to it not trying to prevent it at all and then you have protagonist KC and all her fun buddies and they know what's best for the future is to just make cool stuff and not worry about it and just have fun so so I don't like either these people and it's almost like mankind faces a lot of complex issues without easy solutions it's almost like dystopian stories are important because they're cool and edgy and they work as cautionary tale and cheesy starry-eyed retro future movies are important because they inspire you and make you happy usually it's almost like these are two totally different genres of movie and not fiercely opposed sides in a debate where we have to pick a winner like maybe they aren't too well fighting and one of them has to die and maybe we can have robot Butler's and try to stop the polar bears from disappearing and this movie's weirdest of all because it threatens us with this idea that if we don't make fewer dystopian movies we will descend into a dystopia which makes this a dystopian movie anyway that's my list of things it just sucks because I wanted to like this movie so much and there was stuff that I liked I like to go over the top score that was like going into overdrive the entire time and it likes a lot of the actors especially the kids I thought they were great and I also when I was rewatching it kept noticing that I liked a lot of the dialogue like it had a lot of solid jokes so it's not even like I can say the writing was bad because like it was clearly written by someone with like some wit but the story was just a huge mess the story was like Tomorrowland at the end of the movie where it's just like falling apart you're like what happened and for that matter what happened to Tomorrowland like but anyway the stuff that worked just made everything that didn't work a lot more painful so also it looked like the sequel would have been really cool but then the movie made no money so they're not going to make a sequel the worst thing is that when it bombed financially the studio was like no just because original stories don't make any money or okay it didn't fail because the story was bad it failed because people can't handle innovation let's just stop innovation Thanks Tomorrowland for sending that message like who was that spokesperson was it Hugh Laurie in a crazy space jacket so the best we can hope for now is that it gets the Tron treatment wear it like develops an undeserved following and then they make a kind of lame sequel in 20 years because anything is possible if I wrote a Space Mountain movie space travel would work like you get in this like rickety toboggan that feels like it was built in the 1970s you're sitting there like why is this not enclosed oh we already activated your oxygen shields they're invisible they're like cranking you up this lift Hill getting ready to launch you into space it's like clicking and stuff I don't feel good about that what about gravity people down your lap bar right and where do I put my purse if you look in front of you there's like a little mesh bag and if it doesn't fit in there just hold it with your feet that's fine

Channel: Jenny Nicholson

Views: 1,293,745

Keywords:

Id: C1-74z9dFYs

Length: 21min 11sec (1271 seconds)

Published: Mon Jan 23 2017

Reddit Comments

[u/boot20]

The concept of Tomorrowland sounded so cool, but the execution was pure shit. I was expecting more of a 50s/60s style sci-fi romp not some strange Jason Borne meets Katniss meets Oceans 11 kind of movie.

[u/sksksk1989]

Never seen the movie but saw it on Netflix and was thinking about it. Thank you for sharing this. I will find a better use of my time.

[u/PM_ME_DOG_PHOTOS]

I get why people think the movie blowed, but I liked it.

To me one of the themes of the 50's/60's there was this 'can do' attitude to science and technology where next to nothing was impossible if you just worked away at it, in less than a lifetime humans went from the Wright brothers to Gagarin, and nobody knew what the future held. More modern times seem a lot more grey and dismal, the world is being changed and there's this general feeling of doom and helplessness, regardless of how far we've actually progressed.

I liked the film, I saw it as an attempt to try and bring back that attitude we seem to have lost, that yes there are problems but sitting at home and watching it happen isn't the only option, be the change you want to see and don't just accept what the tv shows.

[u/everfalling]

Hey!... i liked Tron 2 :(

[u/somethin_not_right]

Optimism and bad judgment are good friends, and they both know disappointment very well.

[u/Thompson_S_Sweetback]

I want this girl to be in charge of things.

[u/Buddhas_Bro]

If I had not had a few long winded girlfriends in my life, I would not have been able to watch that entire video.

Still, an interesting review and I like her points

[u/[deleted]]

Thought you were refereing to the music festival lol

[u/[deleted]]

Trying to figure out how I didn't realise the main character was clearly a grown woman..