Thomas The Transformer Engine Review

hello do you remember the adventures of Thomas the Tank Engine and his friends from when you were young well me neither I think I was too old by the time that had become a major media franchise either that or em I'd be locked in the cupboard again honestly don't know but I do remember it for about 15 years ago and my nephew is very young and he was into it quite a lot basically there's a train with a creepy face on and it goes around and has minor-league adventures with other trains all of whom have posh names and there's some trucks that are not very nice or something actually I'm not very good on the plots for this in fact I would recommend you don't go back and watch Thomas the Tank engines and adults all the creepy undercurrent whereby the trains are effectively slaves to some sort of bloke in a top hat called well in fact known only as the Fat Controller which is fairly creepy in itself and they're all evaluated by how useful they are and it's all a bit freakish and to be perfectly honest with you and actually they did give the Fat Controller a name later I think they decided calling him the Fat Controller despite the fact he is a controller and his fat was in some way a politically incorrect they gave him a name of them all right something crashed like em Sir Topham Hatt arrived at yeah that's it I'm pretty sure that's it actually Sir Topham Hatt brilliant I'll give him an even more offensive name like so wank shaft mashite stain or something that that probably explains why I don't write children's television anyway let's have a look at these lovely Thomas the Tank Engine inspired ripoff toys from the time when Thomas and his friends transformed into a giant robot yeah they're sort of a clash of the franchise's here oh you're ready right this one is blue so that's probably Thomas himself here he is with his creepy little face which you probably can't see very well due to reflections yep he's all blue he's got some weird futuristic lump on his back and a giant sword let's have a look at the packaging fantastic sounds like something a crap DJ would say collect three trains to create your robot marvelous so you have to spend three times the amount convert a train the penny is going to look like that what's on the back pretty much the same thing and instructions on how to build your robot that look like Lego instructions written by a madman we got sad onion of course we have Nazi will children to 36 months choking hazard here's a barcode and many many bits of advice on how to get rid of it by recycling it or burning it or whatever so that's number one that appears to be both an arm and a leg judging by the instructions then we have the green engine and I think was there Percy originally it uses a small engine was Percy this one is exactly the same size a Thomas because in fact yeah it's exactly the same train exactly the same toy just instead of getting a big sword you get some sort of freakish shield marvelous and lastly the middle piece the red engine whose name I cannot remember at James Edward maybe we're going to call him James but I might be wrong this one's a bit larger looks a bit more futuristic because it's got a thing on it well as a futuristic more like something you'd see from science fiction made of the 1920s especially with the weird wings at the back oh well time to open them up and transform like some sort of crazy Power Rangers thing how Ranger did have a giant robot was made out of other things in there I can't remember now I think Voltron did as well I'm not the another no fast Xolotl I don't remember it now well anyway ok dry and rubbish sword that was the most fun you'll have watching this right they're horrible packets down laundry sorry Percy Wow why would you have a shield shaped like that you can stick it up to people's noses at once no I did okay red one what we're calling him James I thank you for nothing that's right Wow look at that every boy's dream some plastic crappy trains with horrible faces and look his one is wearing off already kill me put me out of my name is me later my friend right at the instructions up that way and yeah okay according to these instructions the red one is white that makes perfect sense so what happens well lab it comes off it's got wings right this sort of Lonni opens up into a well one of those all clips together clips together then flies apart immediately oh hang on there's a face in it Oh sort of optimist not quite prime optimist not very good it's a generic transformer face small egyptian-style bead on it which oddly seems to be a feature of ripoffs and transformers from parent lad right this is groin or something that's nice and this bit attaches understand well that goes down there like that others mystics back on the back right no no not right wrong God whose likes breaking already mmm they were they would be very careful with this mmm I ain't looking too good or something in wrong oh no we have a connection there we are now we've got a train with a Hayden wing sticking out that looks like a complete mess brilliant right what do we do with these ones that comes off the back again that's all that's its foot I see what right that'll be the leg presumably this comes up in some fashion hmm and again mmm might say a third time that here we go sort them into put your thumbnail under vaccinated comes right leg let's do this the other one so I don't forget as I'm going along other leg it's attached these now actually because obviously the excitement is getting too much for me oh yeah look at that done not that you can look at axe is bigger than fits in the frame let's bend down this side alright what's the deal here can't make head nor tail of the instructions for this bit it's got a face pointing that way and this in some manner sticks onto this was not that doesn't make any sense hmm hang on I've got something this comes down to a little sort of mutant fist so just going by the picture actually as opposed to the instructions done like that ah yes that must be it this doesn't want to go in feels like it's going to snap no we have success it's a wobbly arm let's make another wobbly arm because let's face it you can never have too many and again isn't it oh yeah that felt like it was going to snap but no it has survived don't enter Dern no something slightly disappointing on that so what oh it stuck it on battabox Frankie there we are I've worked it out now right arms attach them to the body presumably there's one and there's two Wow I retract that Wow alright basically all these giant robots go from fight giant monsters don't they I know it happens of these programs in this one his legs drop off that's not a very good attack trust me on this okay this fits onto his arm like that for shield purposes and there we are his his giant super Mehcad duper gundam potato harvest sword there we are let's move the old camera a bit crank not the tripods old or anything there you go words cannot fully explain the beauty of this device it just looks like an absolute abomination of nature really doesn't it looks like The Fat Controller sorry Sir Topham Hatt went absolutely crazy smashed all the trains up and then made a giant robot out of their corpses in order to destroy the island of sodor what's called the island of sodor isn't it the island they were on I love so something like that pretty sure it doesn't actually exist I'd have called it the Isle of sod off anyway there you go four three pounds you two can have a set of slightly crappy semi identical trains I actually rescind my earlier things saying they're exactly the same as n not look until there's different detailing there and look they've got different em I can't remember that bits called up chimneys different pipes sure there's a specific name for that bit on a train but I can't remember it the bit where the steam comes out of like a whales blowhole with a cylinder stuck in it wow that's the worst description of anything ever anyway yeah there you go you two can terrify your children and annoy them immensely by giving them a crappy plastic disgusting looking robot whose legs drop off and that will in some way teach them about life if their life is going to involve robots made out of trains whose legs drop off it could happen you and now it's time for Sydnor 7 the robots head with the combined knowledge and attitude of the Internet Sydnor 7 what is the best way to remove an ink stain from a white shirt you and your mother

Channel: ashens

Views: 698,627

Rating: 4.8983383 out of 5

Keywords: thomas, tank, engine, transformers, power, rangers, voltron, poundland, tat, review, ashens, funny, rip, knock, off

Id: kYRK5lzfb9w

Length: 11min 7sec (667 seconds)

Published: Mon Apr 11 2011

Reddit Comments

[u/LiThiuMElectro]

Why Is everything more entertaining explained with a British accent ?