THE WORLD'S WORST DETECTIVE

[Music] it was a nippy spring evening in Los Angeles it's been two years since the war ended but to be frank my battles never stopped I recall that fateful day where our Commissioner brought me and my longtime partner Roy and for a debriefing about a dope ring I of course was eager as ever to hop on such a case says he's prepared to blow the whistle on a primo reefer distribution ring ah reefer as he said how much it's gonna cost 50 bucks and the departmental front me the 50 you can put in an expense claim he's over at my client's on Hollywood Boulevard see what you can find out oh come on in what are you doing there we go very nice is this middle of the afternoon this crazy woman decides to set fire to the hotel she lives in Wow fire brigade come and put it out a couple hours later she does it again phones up central and says I've set fire to my hotel twice today you'd better come and get me they get officers down there to shoot I know that's the best part the desk sergeant he gets his share of crank calls says alright lady Niro why don't you come on down here later she shows hair still smoking clothes smoldering smelled like a brush fire [Laughter] take the next left [Laughter] alright I'll take the next left Julie tell you the next left all right so forget this I bet this guy over here like $20 and he couldn't eat my hand and goddamnit he wouldn't [ __ ] did it this [ __ ] this [ __ ] Joker over here is eat my [ __ ] hand I want to know about the Reaper another Good Samaritan answer the question ask comes from Tijuana grass from Tawana 50 pounds a week 50 pound 50 [ __ ] cows Manning Freddie the guy at the house that goes by the name whoa hey there's no [ __ ] need for that [ __ ] fifty pounds of dope crazy yeah that's right crazy I mean you who would have 50 pounds at dump all right let's [ __ ] go you're all right Juan Garcia Cruz's residence let's get us a [ __ ] weed [Music] hey buddies at [ __ ] reefer put that [ __ ] away you've got damn hippie hey one we're here to pick up the cheap one stop did a couple of G's my plug just [ __ ] shot at me while I was swinging by to scoop he had it [ __ ] coming hey Paul let's get moving dude there's a [ __ ] Thompson submachine gun this is evidence got to make sure there's no [ __ ] clues on it getting serial number no any any name no nup no there's nothing hidden in the barrel Hey hey buddy you awake you wake hello are you awake what a nice dad he's [ __ ] dead doesn't anyone need regular meals anymore junkies feeding on popcorn and grasshoppers living on soup Doug she's [ __ ] you get the munchies guy have some [ __ ] soups tomato soup oh yeah all right yeah you're too [ __ ] good for that huh do [ __ ] gay you're always too good for and huh huh interesting giving him a lot of soup uh Bennington 20 bucks ammo McCourty steel borne by the [ __ ] it in the breadbox you're hang on let's make a sandwich interesting interesting got some sugar I got coal Oh nuts we could see what the neighbors have to say about crews yeah well screw you okay deaf grant some corn kernels oh no that's EMP MA oh [ __ ] it's a [ __ ] trap door little bastard at a trapdoor to shed more soup more so he'll keeps a secret stash of soup oh maybe we should figure out what's inside you hungry or something Phelps ya hungry for a little bit of [ __ ] reefer Oh ah this is knuckle ishes look at this but look at it it's [ __ ] a fern mmm I'd say that's pretty good value for 12 cents 12 cents holy [ __ ] what a [ __ ] steal two more soup oh my god ooh oh yeah do you have any cigarette papers on you Cole we got things to do yeah so do I you see the trichomes on that [ __ ] dog just putting right there for safekeeping after finding some over-seasoned soup My partner and I decided to go to the soup store to see if we can get ourselves some more dump let's go to the soup store and see if we can get ourselves some more dope are you kidding me [ __ ] hey you drop your purse alright have a nice day ah parnell soup Factory 11:28 a.m. right let's see if we can find out who's been over seasoning the soup in this place hey I think it's underseasoned personally yeah that's me hey how are you Gandhi reefer hey qt I was wondering who runs this [ __ ] mr. Parnell Howard Parnell yeah weird burnout I'll let him know you're here please hey do you mind if I rip ass real quick if you must if you could show these men in to see mr. Parnell Doris they're from the LAPD Follow Me gentlemen Jesus Christ what's up you're a soul sir I just wanted to say that the dope in your soup is [ __ ] trash you might as well be selling oregano that's an outrageous allegation could I see your weed selection of course we have nothing to hide on the desk please Oh Thank You Doris holy [ __ ] you're terrifying [ __ ] me holy [ __ ] sir I demand that you let me inspect the canning area for any illegal herbs slaughterhouse take four week what this is where the produce comes in what what after inspecting the canning stations we came across a lead from one of the staff about a certain Mexican gentleman by the name of Julio Jorge Jorge bola loco poco espresso martini we then followed in nearby trail of weed Dusty's location at a local grocery store nobody move hey I'm looking for someone by the name of Julio Jorge Jorge bolo lo a what the [ __ ] get back here brah where do you think you're going are you serious are you serious right now are you are you really serious okay dude we can talk about dude we can talk we can talk about it dude we can talk we can talk about it I'm not scared of you either you look like a nice guy come on my arms getting [ __ ] sorry here look if you don't stop I'm gonna have to slap the [ __ ] [ __ ] out of you and I don't want to have to do that okay you know what I don't want to do it to you oh [ __ ] oh god stop man bro really that was an easy fight I know you got the Jizo me come on pantsuit here up mmm yep this is definitely weed but where's the needles to inject it so you basically had to blow five guys to get into this gang just a pedal of bitter Wade something like that I do what I'm told bye it was nice talking to you man you're really cool dude okay all right okay yikes after arresting Julio he squealed about a shipment that was coming to the soup factory that night I was hungry for some more soup but even thirstier for action hey if you shoot I'm gonna have to shoot you what the [ __ ] did I just bake a bow detectives found something here you probably want to see sure thing damn hey do you pick your hand there's - call no take a look in these boxes ooh oh my god that is a lot of [ __ ] weed holy [ __ ] I think we got the guy does the name Cruz mean something to you yep you tell anyone about this would be to kill you hey officer how are you yeah don't mind me there take a look at these coins you've been collecting all right so okay egg key yang met owls mas no all right now bad egg met Alves mask a okay how about a metal file I did it would you like the address no I don't 1034 Vine Street Hollywood Oh soon we'll finish up here wash my partner sorry sorry sorry I have astigmatism so I can't really see Roy are you okay I'll tell you what I see what's waiting for us at the top I feel you know are you first call me an Ansel [Applause] all right I think they're all dead yeah alright then enough goofing around working vice Phelps but on behalf of the brass and the moms and dads and the concerned citizens I'd like to come in you and your partner for smashing this dope ring hey reefer is almost as big a threat to the children of this city as communism can we go to KFC I want some Colonel Sanders leave Sanders to me Phelps the chief will be looking after that one but I watch eken Phelps we are celebrating your success don't push your luck Sanders is no longer your problem after that night I was stripped of my badge my hat and all the weed that I pocketed spare this one fund I wasn't cut out to be a detective Warren maybe being a detective just wasn't cut out for me as for what to do next you know I think I'll be paying the evidence Locker a little visit [Music]

Channel: SwaggerSouls

Views: 2,757,515

Rating: 4.9799151 out of 5

Keywords: Funny, fun, game, gaming, gameplay, comedy, hilarious, moments, swag, yeet, swagger, SwaggerSouls, souls, VR, VR Games, HTC Vive, Vive, Oculus, Oculus Rift, LA Noire, LA, Noire, LA Noire The VR Case Files, Misfits, Misfits Podcast

Id: TJnoSUcAtgo

Length: 14min 45sec (885 seconds)

Published: Sat Mar 23 2019

Reddit Comments

[u/alexjhampton]

Love this video

[u/RainbowIsGarbage]

Absolut banger of a video. I think it is the first video i shared to various Groups casue it would be criminal to not see it!