The Urbie | Battletechs mascot and the lords silliest warrior

generic greetings and welcome to science Insanity a channel dedicated to bringing my love of Science Fiction and all its hilariously Stupid humor to you the viewer along for the ride is my co-host and friend Steve sci-fi mostly literate and comedic relief say hello Steve hello The Hunt is over I've returned he is back we finally managed to track voluntarily you sure about that I'm pretty sure we have to track you down to the remote Barren wastes of Ohio and drag you back hey man I wouldn't be caught dead in Ohio wouldn't be caught alive either so guess what we're discussing today please don't let it be Ohio no we're talking about Idaho oh okay okay they got some pretty good potatoes out there no we are talking about battletech's mascot the urban Mech battle text resident meme machine and the most useless ineffective joke ever created but it's still widely loved by the community because funny egg back with big gun do you remember the urban Mecca do I need to get you a reference image please give me a reference image okay check out picture printer because boy oh my God it's the good map oh my God yes yes yes okay we're good it's good it's fantastic it's amazing isn't it beautiful don't you love it it is it is uh the one of the things I've ever laid my eyes on certainly it is in fact one of the images of all time but before we get into the video fully if you'd like to support science Insanity directly then check out our patreon if space shekels are short then like sub comment share the video all that good stuff because every little bit helps and the line must go up if you want to join a community of like-minded Turbo nerds then check out size Discord server I also stream regularly sometimes occasionally I stream so check out twitch as well if you want the once in a blue moon live action content from Psy and with that let's talk about the Irby so Steve what do you think this Mech was designed to do uh is it designed to find an urban environment hahaha just a guess technically correct but no even less than that let me reword the question what do you think the urban Mech can do nothing technically correct again is it a good spinning top is it is it like the uh Stratosphere the needle whatever uh no it is wants to call it it is an excellent Mech for making memes and serving as the comedic relief of the entire series that's his purpose it's a joke Mech anyone who takes it seriously is a fool this thing is absolutely ridiculous and we're gonna get into why anything you could possibly imagine about the Irby any comedic thing that you can think about it from anything you know about BattleTech it has it it's got all the jokes and it's worse than you could possibly imagine let me let me get you another more modern updated one that's not quite so egg Centric because this bring back the egg bring back the egg there we go that's more like it this Mech has gone through so many iterations and every single one of them is uglier than the last it's great so the Irby is an apex Ambush Predator it's designed to lie in weight as long as needed before springing out and dealing the decisive killing blow it's supposed to be an urban combat specialist that relies on the tight confines of City layouts to get into position and bring its heavy weapons on target the only problem is that like I said everything from minute one was a mistake with the Irby it was all a disaster let's start out a little bit with the stats before we delve into it in more detail further because it's really really funny and funny in the sad kind of way where you have two options which are cry or laugh and you chose to laugh this Mech is is awful truly genuinely god-awful like I said people love to Meme and joke about the Irby one-shotting things with its monstrous guns but the reality is even with this low profile it is an incredibly fat Target as I'm sure you can see and while it does have an impressive amount of armor for its egg-shaped size it is not enough but for the most part you know it's meant to be used in the heart of a city where you can't maneuver almost at all so you know the Irby will perform reasonably well there can't be outflanked or out maneuvered and it's got plenty of positions to hide and you know jump out from that thing ain't doing no jumping I can tell you that much oh we'll get to that don't worry you're you are factually incorrect about that well actually no you're not it doesn't really do jumps it more does like Gremlin hops but what perfect Gremlin tops we'll we'll get to that don't worry it's fine you know what else benefits from Urban combat take a wild guess with everything you know about BattleTech um uh um when the um infantry amazingly you're you're actually correct you are 110 correct infantry and heavier mechs benefit from Urban combat because infantry is not supposed to get that one wrong sorry I mean you no I that was kind of up in the air I I was expecting you to throw at something like all bigger mechs you know just generally and I I had a bunch of different responses but you you actually managed to get one of them correct good job hey haven't lost it yet but you are losing it slowly it it's waning yeah just like your hair it leaves a little more every day hey hey leave the hair out of it in urban settings pretty much all heavy and assault mechs designed for them perform way better than the Irby can and infantry are absolutely deadly if they manage to get a setup in there I don't remember if you were there for the Infantry episode because that was a while ago I think you were right yeah I think you were pretty sure it was pretty sure before you before you ran away for a while here's here's an image of how the Irby actually works in Urban combat if it has to go attack things rather than just waiting in a ditch for something to come to it right the Irby runs around a corner with its ac20 the big funny gun derps around the corner of the museum only to come face to face with some awesome or a Warhammer or an atlas or something even scarier than those or even like big medium mechs like a centurion or an enforcer and that poor Irby is going to fire off one maybe two shots and then become that Museum's new display exhibit faster than the pilot can [ __ ] himself from the return fire and the worst part is that it's built for urban combat you know what Urban combat is really good at doing doing turning things into proper fights I don't know well yeah turning things into proper fights but also wasting all of your goddamn ammunition have you seen how many artillery shells and how many bullets are fired in your average Urban engagement it's basically never yeah like it's basically never ending gunfire and the urban Mech has at the best of times seems to be a slight issue there yeah it's a bit of an issue some of the versions of the Irby that load missiles have one shot and then they're end of ammo very designed beautifully designed and you know a big part of urban combat is repositioning you know if somebody figures out your position they're going to start calling an artillery on you and it's probably a good idea to get out of there the urban Mech can't move it like it's it's so slow it is so painfully slow that I'm gonna throw the ball back into your court how fast do you think it can move in uh negative miles per hour there is something negative about it which we'll get into later which kind of breaks physics and is really funny but give me like an actual number I can guarantee you it's not the weight um we're going to say 15 kilometers an hour oh you're so close it's just a little bit faster it's walking speed its walking speed is 20 kph which fun fact Olympic sprinters can outrun the Irby just on foot Usain Bolt runs at like 24. so people like athletes at the top of their game can straight up outrun this thing if it's just sprinting down the road if the Irby seems pretty good yeah if the Irby really piles on the uh the pressure there and it's really hoofing it it can get up to like 32 but even that's not particularly fast and it can be outrun by like a good athlete on a bicycle or a motorcycle or like any vehicle that can move straight out it is so many vehicles that can move I believe you're forgetting the Bob simple tank okay well to be fair the Bob sample is the real life Irby so it stacks it's just it's just a big brick with a few guns on it so to try and I do mean try because it didn't succeed to make up for this the urban Mech has jump Jets good good old-fashioned rockets to try to eat this thing faster than it can run so remember how I said it can't really jump but it can Gremlin hop yeah yeah it can barely move when it's using the jump Jets it is an absolute joke of a Mech it's so funny it's so funny battle Tech design at its finest if your Mech is too slow slap Rockets to it does it actually fix the problem no well it doesn't matter just say problem solved on the drawing board and be done with it the stats proper because isn't just laughing at things that it can't do properly let's let's talk a little bit about the design history get a little bit more serious before we jump back into the trash can bashing so this this video is going to make people so mad since we're essentially [ __ ] on like the franchise's mascot I can go out um uh I'm gonna I'm gonna be nice to him I'm not gonna say anything fair enough so the Irby was designed in 2675 around a century before the star leak died and everyone decided to start fighting each other for like 400 years the urban Mech was conceived to do exactly what its name suggests fight in urban environments this was also the era of Mech design where every company and their mother was selling the star league Jack and Dick worth of quality battle mix basically the start League was buying literally everything U.S defense budget and a billion and one contractors all proposing stuff and the star league went yeah just give me all of it and so you have an era where the star league is pouring unbelievable amounts of money into weapons development and advancement and they're basically just buying everything regardless of its if it's awful this meant that the star league was essentially building up huge stockpiles of absolute trash you did get stuff sometimes like The Marauder which is genuinely an amazing battle Mech and one of my favorite ever but this is the environment that the Irby was designed into essentially the Irby was supposed to give more time for heavier elements and reinforcements to get into position while hitting the enemy hard enough to actually do something of note most other light mechs by this point were focused either exclusively on scouting some of which literally didn't even have weapons on the light Mech which is really funny or flanking and harassment by being a light Mech capable of actually fighting toe-to-toe with larger mechs even if only for a limited time it was thought that the Irby would fill a missing and vital Battlefield role it did not the designers it did not the designers were wrong and thus crackhead R2D2 was born coming in [Music] coming in at 30 tons the Irby is on the chunkier side of light Max but not quite the heaviest which goes up to 35 tonners like the Jenner if I remember correctly which is actually a really good light Mech that's on the heavier side meant to fight things the Irby also came with six tons of armor which is actually a lot it put it on par with much larger mechs in the medium weight category and to trade blows the Irby also carried some really big weapons like I mentioned the Irby was supposed to actually do damage not just harmlessly plink machine gun rounds off their armor to that end the default Loadout for the trash can was an autocannon 10 and the clanner special a small anti-pigeon laser the big gun on the right arm and the anti-pigeon laser in the left arm yeah you see that you see that tiny little gun on the side in all of the images we love the anti-figeon laser [Music] you know believe it or not that's supposed to be for anti-infantry work protect the urban [Music] oh you know Legends are the biggest threat in urban Warfare absolutely by the way just a random aside if people like the urban Max so much that there's actually a box set you can buy with 12 of them well I mean you know um uh I mean people are always entitled to have wrong opinion it's fantastic it's like um yes an entire Lance of four Urban mechs filling out a total combat Squad nah it's not enough give me three times that number like okay this is a genuine question for hobbyists which crazy [ __ ] out there which one of you needs 12 Urban mechs in one package and there are images on Google of people that have 24 which one of you needs 24 Urban mechs what are you doing with them all here's a dude who literally just painted the rainbow in urban mix are these like your version of paint chips from the hardware store you can compare colors for all your future builds like what is the point of this that's not a bad idea honestly I it may be onto something there actually you know what as someone who's in the Warhammer 40K yeah that's not actually too unreasonable by the way here's another image of the urban Mech and a dude cosplaying as the urban Mech I love that image it's great that might be one of the most cursed images of all time I don't know it's it's pretty good uh yes the anti-pigeon laser so for the most part there are a lot of variations on what the Irby can carry but that's pretty much how it always looks big weapon in the right small one in the left some of the weapon swaps were more boring like changing the regular single shot breach loading ac10 for the semi-auto ultravariant or the shotgun LBX version of the same gun and those are pretty boring happen all the time the autocannon was most common as the urban Mech didn't have other weapon hardpoints so swapping it out would require a partial rebuild of the mech this was this was done but only for a few hilarious circumstances let me let me let me get those those examples for you because I oh boy do I got some images for you so actually you know what hang on I have I have a better reference image that I can grab to explain what these rebuilds were where is my Timberwolf so that's the Timberwolf you see those massive missile launchers on the side yes imagine strapping one of those to an urban Mech and that gives you this absolute beautiful Monster my God I am the um uh so good yeah I got I got nothing and the funny thing is that's not even the biggest one that's that's 20 missiles that's only 20. the erby mech version of it has 30. so you you add like another two rows of missiles onto that thing and you get how big it actually is in lore it's so good and there's versions of it that just completely give up they just go nah [ __ ] it with the multiple weapons it's just a colossal attachment on the side with like three Warheads four Warheads that's the arrow for normally you only find that missile launcher on like artillery vehicles or really really really big battle Max but you know the the urban Mecha meme so they just just toss it on it'll be fine the the urban Mech is the definition or it has the fattest [ __ ] around and find out energy in all of BattleTech it's designed and looks like such a joke in fact I'm pretty sure the Irby proves that like the smaller something is the more violent it is since all that anger and existence has less space to fit in I mean moving on to more raw stats let's talk let's talk about the engine remember how I said there's gonna be some negative stuff in here what do you what do you think what do you think Powers the engine how heavy uh negative energy congratulations you're 110 correct yeah so if it has the smallest engine in battle Tech as far as I'm aware just straight up so powering this thing to move at its blisteringly slow speeds is a Linux pattern 60 rating engine the the smallest engine is a 100 rating on literally everything else like the smallest commercially available engine is twice as big this engine is Magic this is not canon but it shows up in a video game so I'm just it's official in mechwarrier online the Orbeez engine is so small it breaks physics it has a negative weight it makes the mech lighter when you install it freeing up more space for bigger weapons that's that's pretty good [Music] dude this thing is Magic it literally breaks physics you add more [ __ ] onto it and it gets lighter it's so good which begs the question why couldn't you just keep slapping that engine onto it over and over until you've made it like actually negative weight uh you see there there's a slight issue with that though because uh um why not just keep adding legs like a centipede and putting more engines is this the new tech the the urban train it's just like 20 pairs of legs with 10 pairs of upper torso on top it's like an armored train it just walks around the city I feel good who okay whatever artist you were I can't remember your name off the top of my head who built the sci technical please can you can you can you design the urban train please it'll be funny I promise yeah I promise it'll be funny oh my God it'll be worth your time I promise oh God trust trust I trust so moving on to why the Irby survived as long as it did because it it survived the Warring States period basically and it survived the clan Invasion and it survived the Dark Age that happened afterwards you wanna you wanna take a wild guess why it survived so long in the lore uh because uh um you couldn't uh I don't know is so the actual reason legitimately is for the most part people forgot it existed or just straight up ignored it yeah good yeah okay so when the successor State generals were were building their armies and beefing up their supply chains the Irby would always be that kid left out at the end that raises his hand and it's like coach you forgot about me I'm not on the list nobody picked me and every single time said General would pinch the bridge of his nose sigh heavily and just put them all in Garrison or Reserve because they couldn't do anything else the urban Mech an the the urban Mech did perform well on the defensive when in urban environments but the issue was that was all it was good at and you can do the same thing with multiple other far more versatile weapon systems so because of the aforementioned slow speed and the jump Jets being uh not enough to make up for it if the Irby was trying to attack into an enemy City it was food it was literally just farmed for XP by the defending infantry if it got caught up in an ambush by the enemy infantry it couldn't kill them fast enough and couldn't run away so it died it would literally walk be walking down the street and then from all the buildings they would pull an ambush but no [ __ ] then from all the buildings they would pull an attack they'd literally lean out the windows with their RPGs and their missile launchers and just blow the Irby to hell it could not attack and since the Irby only had two minutes of ammo it basically gets one Ambush off then it has to run all the way to the back lines to re-arm itself it was extremely inefficient at basically everything it could do also it can't run away and it's a giant walking egg so once you see it it's almost impossible to unsee it I mean come on look at it I didn't see it okay foreign tell me tell me I'm wrong tell me if you saw this thing you're wrong oh sorry did you want like actual thing it's impossible to unsee the Irby fact and for the most part this meant that despite the irby's Home factory being destroyed for no particular reason I think it was just there and someone thought it would be funny to blow it up it survived in huge numbers through the entirety of basically all of BattleTech and even Beyond this Mech is a cockroach it just refuses to die and fun fact actually I think I have the image here oh I do the urban Lord I it uh okay so this is this is a joke this is a joke by the way uh this is a community meme it's called the urban Lord which is a 100 ton assault Mech version of the Irby it's even slower but it has so much armor that is basically the two next biggest assault mechs put together and it has an insane number of guns like multiple of the biggest guns in the setting plus multiple of the biggest energy weapons in the setting it's basically a walking bunker it is it is a stationary fortification put on legs walking around at you make that specific one the train [Laughter] I really hope someone draws that it'll be so funny there's one last thing that we're gonna joke about before we kind of end off the video on the RV there was one faction which used this Mech prodigiously like all the time I we we had a very obvious hint to it earlier you want to take a wild guess which faction actually used this thing of course it's the capellans it's always it would be the capellans were literally responsible for like two-thirds of all Urban Mech usage on the battlefield the last third being from the Federated Suns and the only reason they use them is because every time the Federated Suns kick the capellan's ass they would steal like all yeah they would they would capture a bunch of them literally it says that in the lore on the wiki like the reason the reason the Federated Suns use the urban Mech is because they keep capturing them from the capellans and that is pretty much it this Mech is so dumb it's the mascot of BattleTech and everyone loves it despite the fact that it is one of the most useless junkers ever made and exists purely for meme potential oh wait nerbies nerbies hang on let me let me see if I can find one of these to show you uh come on give me a higher res image I'm begging you internet please God it's so frustrating can you just yes there we go the nuclear Irby they put they put nuclear missiles on it it's one of the only battle mechs it's so dumb this is such a stupid stupid Mech I hate it okay so that is pretty much the end of the video Patron thanks time it's been it's been a while dude David David Gabe he remembers we have a lot we have a lot a lot more patrons now do you know any of them uh dumb uh um no no I was not looking at Discord when I said it okay all right oh yeah there's the other David Gabe uh the other David G I'm sorry we we've agreed that doesn't count because they have the same name oh no it counts so thank you very much to all of the patrons supporting the Channel with a special thanks to the five dollar tier patrons David G Augie eleven Bravo crunchy Terry Higgins Pedro Munoz David G the other one silencer box apollyon Phoenix BT Legends electroboy 11 Logan Maynard Mickey David Armond Credo Robin schnapp at Fenway Striker Tachi tsukane he's Deb pixie vertis fabric 445 and Shelby Bob your name is still disgusting mini crustacean Charles the snap and Polly thank you very much for your support I hope it'll continue in the future and don't laugh at me everyone knows anchovies are disgusting it's a fake food I don't I don't believe anybody eats them it's not real it's so fake food that's a statement I don't even seafood fish aren't real you mean to tell me someone launches a wire into the ocean and pulls out a Vallejo fish please shut up I I know these lies

Channel: SCIENCE INSANITY

Views: 23,280

Keywords: battletech, mechwarrior, battletech lore, classic battletech, inner sphere, mech, house steiner, house kurita, battletech urbanmech, urbanmech, mwo urbanmech, mechwarrior 5, mechwarrior online, mwo, battlemech, star league, federated suns, draconis combine, house davion, mecha, battletech lore video, mechwarrior mercenaries, capellan confederation, mw5, free world league, SCI, science insnaity, science, insanity

Id: 2vM3bzrUCVU

Length: 25min 9sec (1509 seconds)

Published: Fri Sep 08 2023