“The man’s gay.” “And he’s gay.” “I’m gay”
“She’s gay.” “You’re not gay?” In November of 1993, Fran Drescher took the
zany antics of Lucille Ball and the sexy vamping of Mae West, and combined them with her own
original spin as a flashy girl from Flushing to create The Nanny. The character was bold and audacious and lived
in a world where queer people were a part of everyday life. At a time when most other sitcoms treated
gay characters and stories as an awkward crisis or an opportunity for a Very Special Episode,
what was remarkable about The Nanny is how unremarkable queer characters were in the
world that Drescher created. Hey friends, I’m Matt Baume, I make videos
about queer pop culture. And this time we’re taking a look at The
Nanny and what made its treatment of gay characters and stories special at a time when US sitcoms
were juuuust starting to open their closet door. For example, take a look at this episode of
Friends where Ross and Rachel interview nannies. They meet a male nanny who’s tender and
emotional… “I really do understand how hard it's gotta
be to leave your child with another person. It's leaving behind a piece of your heart.” And that’s all it takes for Ross to respond
with suspicion: “Are you gay?” But now take a look at how the Nanny responds
when she detects a male nanny in the next room. “I was instantly attracted to him, which
means he’s definitely unavailable. … Plus, did you see that upper body? … He’s either gay or a priest with a Soloflex.” And instead of getting hostile and accusatory,
like Ross on Friends, to her it’s no big deal. “Niles, please, the man’s gay.” Now maybe it’s just me, but these two clips
feel very different. The dialogue’s similar, the jokes are similar,
and yet ... but before we get into that, let’s talk about what The Nanny is. And by the way, if you want to watch the shows
featured in this video, I’ve got links in the description to where you can watch them
streaming. And a link to my Patreon if you like these
videos and want to help me make more. So. The Nanny. Debut in 1993, Fran Drescher plays a free-spirited
nanny to a family of a rich Broadway producer with whom she has a will-they won’t-they
romance despite being from different worlds. It’s The Sound of Music meets Mame, set
against the backdrop of musical theater. I wonder if we’ll encounter anything gay. From the very beginning, The Nanny included
lots of little gay jokes and references, like this gag from episode four: “Oh, I’m feeling a bit queer.” “Don’t ask, don’t tell. But for God's sakes, come out of the closet.” On its own, that might seem like just a cute
little one-off joke. Maybe even slightly progressive, that she
would encourage someone to come out. But the joke’s actually part of a pattern
on The Nanny, a running theme across the series, of gay people not being a big deal. In fact, they devoted a whole episode to that
idea — Season 2, episode 19, “A Fine Friendship.” The episode starts at breakfast, with another
family’s nanny, a man named Kurt, dropping off a kid for a playdate. Kurt is quite handsome, resplendent in denim,
but Fran is nonchalant and doesn’t even bother to flirt with him. Niles, the butler, is surprised she didn’t
make a move: “The man’s gay.” She says she can just tell, and proves it: “Kurt, who understudied Carol Channing in
Dolly?” “Joanne Worley.” “Hello.” Now, on one hand, it is perhaps a reductive
stereotype to say that gay men are obsessed with musical theater. On the other … this line personally made
me shriek, because not only am I obsessed with musical theater, I’m obsessed with
the famous Carol Channing/Joanne Worley rivalry of 1982 when they both played Dolly in two
simultaneous productions at theaters just a few miles away from each other. But let’s set that aside for a moment, if
we must. Because what makes this scene significant
is just how insignificant Fran considers Kurt’s sexual orientation. On most sitcoms up through the ‘90s, if
a gay character or storyline appears, it tends to make things weird -- awkward and uncomfortable. “Oh Suzanne, loosen up. It’s the 90s.” “Yeah, well it’s not the gay 90s.” “There’s nothing to be embarrassed about. Lots of guys have homoerotic dreams.” “Do you?” “Are you kidding?” “See I’m even uncomfortable about being
uncomfortable. That’s how uncomfortable I am.” “Frasier, I’ve come to tempt you.” “Really?” “John is a ho…mo…” “Right.” “...sexual.” [Scream] On a lot of 90s sitcoms, gay characters can’t
JUST be gay. They have to be the main complication of the
week, the problem that needs to be resolved by the end of the episode. But not on The Nanny. Everyone is comfortable with Kurt, even the
stuffy Mr. Sheffield, who doesn’t mind if Kurt spends time in Fran’s bedroom. “It’s a little different with Kurt. He’s like your friend Val, only with a five
o’clock shadow.” “You’ve never seen Val at five.” REVERSAL Fran’s totally comfortable with having a
gay friend. Or at least, what she thinks is a gay friend. Upstairs, she’s trying on a dress that looks
like a salute to gloryholes, and Kurt starts to get flirty… “Kurt, what’s tiramisu?” “I have no idea.” “Oh my God! You’re not gay!” This joke did make me laugh, even though it’s
another one based on reductive stereotypes. Maybe I’m ok with it because I actually
don’t know what tiramisu is either. Am I maybe actually straight? Anyway, there’s your Act II twist. What I love about this is that it’s an inversion
of the usual gay misunderstanding trope. A decade earlier, you might see characters
freaking out about a gay person in their midst, like on The Golden Girls… “I’m quite fond of you.” “I’m fond of you too.” But this episode of the Nanny flips it. Now the problem is that there’s a straight
guy there. “When did you find out you were straight? And does your mother know?” Not only that, being mistaken for gay isn’t
a big deal for Kurt — as it might’ve been on other shows. “I’ve been outed! I wasn’t even in!” “Now everyone’s going to think we’re
gay!” “Not that there’s anything wrong with
that!” “No, not at all.” But Kurt takes it in stride. “If you liked me when I was gay, you’re
going to love me now.” Anyway, like I was saying, it’s a fun flip
for surprise-heterosexuality to be the problem, rather than surprise-homosexualty. In the end, Fran realizes that she liked Kurt
better as a friend than a boyfriend, and after one more date, that’s the last we see of
him. Almost — we’ll come back to Kurt later. But this isn’t the last time that the comedy
on The Nanny will involve gay characters or themes. Following this episode, the show kept it gay
with the occasional joke: “What do you do if you have four queens?” “Gather round the piano and sing songs from
Gypsy.” Or even the occasional character… “I don’t know Queens.” “Well now you know one.” And sometimes even a storyline. Take a look at Season 3’s “Oy Vey, You’re
Gay.” Fran has realized that she loves Mr. Sheffield. So she’s upset when he falls for a woman
named Sydney — but, it turns out, Sydney isn’t going to return his affection. “I’m gay.” “You’re gay? Oh thank God!” That’s the best response anyone could hope
for when coming out — except for maybe this. “I’m gay!” “He’s gay!” “He’s gay!” “Did you hear the news? He’s gay?” And even through Fran’s saying that because
she’s relieved to not have a romantic rival, still, I wish that’s how more people responded
to a coming-out in the 90s! Quick sidenote, this has echoes of the My
Brother’s Keeper episode of The Mary Tyler Moore Show, one of the few shows in the ‘70s
where someone has a positive response to a gay character. In that episode, Phyllis is upset that her
brother is spending time with Rhoda, whom Phyllis hates. Rhoda explains to Phyllis why there’s nothing
between them: “He’s gay!” “He, he … he’s what?” “I thought for sure you knew, Phyl. We’re not getting married.” “Oh Rhoda, I’m so relieved!” I’ve got a whole video about that episode. Link to that and many of the other shows I
talk about in this video in the description. Twenty years later, The Nanny picks up that
hug and takes it a step further: Sydney asks Fran if she’s gay too. Unlike how other shows might handle that question,
Fran’s not offended or even insulted. After she nonchalantly says no, she even seems
to consider it for a moment: “Too bad, I would have asked you out.” “Great, a gorgeous professional finally
asks me out, and it’s a woman. You’re not Jewish, are you?” One year earlier, Friends had an entire episode
where Chandler freaks out after being mistaken as gay. “Can you believe she thought that?” One year later, Frasier had an episode where
he’s terrified he might be gay because he keeps having gay dreams — featuring the
same actor who delivered the queens joke on The Nanny. “Well, look who’s up.” It’s one thing for The Nanny to be OK with
having gay characters. But for Fran to be so unconcerned to be mistaken
for queer is truly groundbreaking. In the 70s, a similar mistake on WKRP in Cincinnati
makes a character threaten to jump off a building. In the 80s, it throws a character into a fury. “You mean, you’re …”
“Well, aren’t you?” “Well, what do you think?” But on the Nanny, she seems open to it. I can’t think of any previous sitcom where
someone responds as well as Fran does here — let me know in the comments if there’s
any I’m just not thinking of. It’s a pretty powerful moment, showing that
where Fran is concerned, there’s nothing insulting or troubling or in any way wrong
with being gay. But there’s one scene that’s even more
powerful, and that’s in the Season 3 episode “Val’s Apartment,” which has one of
the weirdest crossovers I’ve ever seen. In that episode, Fran and her friend Val move
into an apartment together, across the street from a bar full of handsome single men they’re
hoping to date. Can you guess what the surprise twist is going
to be??? We’ll get to that in a moment. But first we need to meet their new landlord. “Boy I’d like to see the moron that talked
you into this dump.” “Hello!” Who’s this? Take a look at this apartment. This character. How he’s dressed, what he sounds like … ring
any bells? “And there is no reason on Earth why Prince
Charming cannot walk through our front door.” “Hello!” It’s Squiggy from Laverne & Shirley! A sitcom that debuted 17 years earlier in
1978. Squiggy and Leonard were Laverne & Shirley’s
goofy upstairs neighbors. Now, set aside the fact that Laverne & Shirley
was set in Milwaukee and The Nanny is in New York. It’s TV magic! The landlord is clearly Squiggy, and he’s
still friends with Leonard. More than friends, in fact. “I share the landlording responsibilities
with my significant other other, Leonard. Why we’ve been together now 17 years. Seventeen years and still no children. But we keep trying!” I am very impressed that they were able to
get away with a joke that dirty on CBS, and I’m delighted that The Nanny took an old
sitcom that had been off the air for over a decade and retroactively made two of the
characters lovers. The power that has! Once again, on The Nanny is unique in that
gay characters aren’t a problem. Yes, Fran’s annoyed because she was hoping
to pick up some dates and now that seems like a lost cause… “There’s gotta be at least a couple of
guys here who are going to be interested in us.” “Clang clang clang went the trolley…” But the problem of the episode isn’t the
gays, it’s Fran’s love life that’s the crisis of the episode. Compare that to this episode of Maude, where
the existence of a gay bar causes an uproar: “But you see gay people shouldn’t be at
a bar having a good time. They should be at home, alone. Being ashamed that they’re gay.” Eighteen years later, and the gays down the
street aren’t embarrassing or undesirable. They’re just the neighbors. Another thing that sets The Nanny apart is
that it’s a world where gay people aren’t just sassy friends — they actually have
relationships. Squiggy and Leonard are celebrating their
17th anniversary… “Seventeen is meat.” And on another episode, Fran meets a recently
widowed gay man, and the show acknowledges that some people aren’t so accepting of
their relationship: “Now he’s gone, and his family, they pretend
that I never existed.” Look at Fran’s reaction — she’s shocked
that the family wasn’t more accepting. Maybe she gets that from her mother: “And he’s gay.” “So you seeing him again?” ...
“Ma, how desperate do you think I am? Friday, we’re going to see Showboat.” It’s just really sweet. Even older generations are totally fine with
the gay character! This is just how the world created by Fran
Drescher works, throughout the run of The Nanny, from beginning to end. And even after. You see, The Nanny wrapped in 1999, and in
the years that followed, Fran’s marriage to her husband ended too. He was an integral part of the show — you
can see his name there in the credits, Peter Marc Jacobson. And the two of them met in high school, married
young, and stop me if you know where this is going, he came out as gay in the early
2000s. But just as Fran the character took homosexualtiy
in stride, Fran in real life was pretty accepting. They remained close, and they even continued
to work together. In 2011, they even developed a show together
called Happily Divorced in which Fran plays … a woman whose husband Peter comes out
as gay, but remains close. “You know Petey, nobody’s life is perfect. But ours is pretty good.” And by the way, one of the guest stars who
pops up on Happily Divorced is played by the same actor who played Kurt. This time, he plays a jerk who cheats on his
wife, so I guess Fran dodged a bullet on that one. Aside from her TV shows, in real life Fran
Drescher has supported GLAAD’s Spirit Day, she supported inclusive scouting, she put
her money where her mouth is and raised money to overturn Prop 8. When New York was debating a marriage equality
bill, she made ads supporting its passage: “Join me. Be a New Yorker who supports marriage equality.” And after New York passed the bill, she conducted
gay weddings. “I now pronounce you husband and husband!” And here’s the amazing thing: She’s still
going. Last year, during a pandemic, Fran dropped
everything and went to Canada to film Lifetime’s first gay holiday movie, The Christmas Setup,
where she plays a mom who sets up her son with his childhood crush. “I don’t need you meddling in my social
life.” “Oh, hi Patrick!” “Fate that we crossed paths.” “Fate, or Kate?” “I’ll just leave you two boys to it.” And viewers, I’ve watched a lot of gay movies. Some of them just kind of blur together for
me. But just the trailer for this one made me
sit up and get misty-eyed. How come? Well, let Fran explain: “What I love about this movie is that it
doesn’t have any angst. It’s not about, you know, the hardship of
coming out or rejecting parents. It’s none of that. ... I have a son that happens to be gay who
I love, you know, dearly. … And my setups end up being much more successful
than any matchmaking I’ve ever done in real life.” No angst, so hardship, no rejection. The son’s not a sassy side-character, he’s
not problem, he’s a person, and he gets to have the sweet schmaltzy story about falling
in love. It took until 2020 for both Lifetime and Hallmark
to start making holiday movies with same-sex couples as the main characters. 2020! Meanwhile, Fran Drescher’s just casually
been including queer characters her whole career, even back when it would have been
far easier to treat them like the crisis of the week. But of COURSE that’s no surprise — Fran’s
always been a trendsetter. By the way, there are more great queer moments
from The Nanny, and there’s also a fantastic story about the series of lucky coincidences
that led to the show getting made in the first place. For more, check out my Patreon. I’m going to be posting more clips that
I just didn’t have room for in this video. And sign up for my mailing list at mattbaume.com
for sneak peeks at what I’m working on next. Also, please, I’m begging you, let me know
if the comments what tiramisu is. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’ve got this
weird taste in my mouth. “Let’s see your mouth…”
