The Effects of Hazing and Sexual Assault on the Army Profession

they come in open the door and I can see them all there so I know what's going to happen they're smiling they rush me off my chair and throw me on my bed to where half my body is on the bed and half my my legs are hanging off one guy grabs around my legs holding both of them in one arm and the other two uh two sergeants put a knee on my shoulder here and a knee on my shoulder here and held my arms down so I couldn't do anything and they both proceeded to uh they ripped my pants down and just did the same thing as um this happened to my roommate they were funneling my genitals um The Specialist that had my legs was kept trying to um put fingers in my anus and he did successfully repeatedly and it was the same thing just this is our dance this is our dance or smiling I'm flailing around and I'm kind of nervous laughing just cuz I have no idea how to react to this my roommate was sitting on the bed just staring there in awe just absolutely shocked like I we had talked about it and it was one of those he didn't realize what was happening to him until he saw it from a different perspective from an outside perspective and he just it just freaked him out so afterwards it was a normal welcome to platoon good to have you here the only people I hang out with was other guys that it happened to and we we developed a pretty close Bond but we decided that we didn't want to go forward with it because at the time we didn't think that it was a criminal hazing we didn't think that it was raped we didn't want to admit it to ourselves that this actually happened it was just we're like oh it's just a joke they're just a joke don't worry about it but then more and more things started happening in the unit that led us to understand okay there's a really big problem here they need to fix this um anytime we would go to training we would get on the bus and if the NC's were already on the bus every time we'd walk by them they'd start trying to shove fingers up our anus just through our pants they grab our balls it just it got repetitive ridiculous and then on my birthday uh about 10:00 at night they have this thing where they came into my room ripped me off my bed uh three guys held me down on the concrete face down I'm in just nothing but pts so I mean I'm it's just light polyester they had a about a quarter inch thick leather belt that they would whip you uh amount of times that is your birthday so mine with time was 22 and then one for extra so I had 23 lashings and this was on video um the commander there the First Sergeant's there everyone's there participating laughing having a good time but this crippled me for about 2 days I've been in hazing events before I've played football I understand guys will be guys and but it's not to this level like it was uh um the snapping towels in the bathroom the putting shaving cream on someone while they're sleeping it's just little stuff it's just jokes that guys like to do to each other but this was I've never seen anything like it and then for me just to be able to H down against my will and I can't react and I literally couldn't do anything it was demasculate it was uh humiliating above all and I felt that they were trying to um make me feel my rank make me feel that I was beneath them that they were in charge that they owned me I felt like I was nothing that I I didn't even know how to go about talking to someone about this because I'm just a lowely PFC no one's going to listen to me it doesn't matter to leaders that say that there's no way this is happening I can guarantee you're wrong and if you just take a minute and actually watch your guys watch how they react around other people don't you need to sit back and not let your presence really be known because they're going to act a different way around you but if you can just observe and see how they treat each other you'll start seeing little key factors the the man-on-man touching that um childish horse play things like that is what happened it started as a little thing and then those things build up they escalate so if you can catch things early on and prevent that you need to change the attitude of your guys and your leaders and make sure that that stuff isn't happening it should be we should be treating each other as professionals not as um little kids messing around it shouldn't be like that in my first Troop that I was in they were very respectful they we all knew our jobs and we all did our jobs and they gave you the respect of your rank it wasn't a you're specialist I'm going to treat you like you're less of a person than I am they gave me that respect and I gave them the respect they deserved and it worked better for us it built our relationship I trusted them they trusted me and we got the job done more efficiently um whenever someone would come to the platoon we would just get together and go for drinks we would welcome them and make sure they felt like they could trust us as soon as they met us I wanted them to know that we're there for them even you know you're a part of our group now the NC's took care of you and they made made sure that you needed or whatever you needed you you had and then when I went to the other troop there was a line unit so they had a very different approach to things it was you're beneath us you're not people don't talk to us don't approach us don't do anything so even if I did feel the need to tell someone I didn't know who I could approach about that or who I could talk to because there was no relationship there there was no trust there it was just I work with these people and I'm going to try not to piss them off so I don't get shot when we reported the incident we went back to the people that we trusted and that was our upper echelon this was our our Squadron level our commander our s major and we explained the story to them and they immediately took action they did everything they could to take care of us got CID involved figure out and got the Brigade Commander involved and was very pushing for this to proceed and be handled correctly and they took the time to establish our needs make sure that we were safe at all times I felt that I could trust them and I did trust them I gave them that respect because they were treating us well and I appreciated them for that fact then came November and we had a change of command and the new command team was just awful at taking care of us we they didn't even speak to us for six months we had so many issues going on when I got back from Iraq they had me and one of the guys living next to each other we had to try to get that fixed immediately and it just isn't they just moved us to another building that's in the same complex so we had a share laundry room and every time I went to the laundry room their entire troop including these guys would harass me and just give me death stairs I always felt like I could get jumped at any time cuz these guys are just getting drunk and hammered on the steps right across from me I didn't feel that my command team had my back in anything um my mom had called them with concerns uh that I had expressed to her and they flat out lied to her about what they were doing to to protect us and keep us safe and that's what upset us the most so my mom called Senator Judy and it was only until she got involved that things started changing and I think is the exact opposite of what should happen there should be a sense of even if I'm a new leader to a situation I need to take care of the guys that I have now and see what I can do to ensure things are going smoothly I was psyched up to stay in um I was getting convinced to go warrant officer and I was really passionate about making this a career I was really good at my job and I took pride in my job then this happened and I didn't want to be associated with anyone who wore this the US army tag I didn't want to ncos I couldn't look at just because I I felt no connection to I didn't want to be proud of being in an organization like this and that crushed me because it just took my entire life goal and just shattered it instantly I joined the National Guard now because I was always told don't judge the Army by your first unit uh take your time take another chance and see how it goes so that's what I'm doing now but with that I don't think that should be the case and we need to have cohesion and consistency in the Army to where every unit you go to you should look forward to being there you shouldn't be trying to escape you should be looking to succeed where you're at and with the guys that you have at all times and we need to figure out something how we could change it for me and the other victims when we finally came forward we were all reputable soldiers we were good soldiers and they knew our character so when we told them they immediately believed us because first off of how we presented ourselves but they were absolutely shocked that this could happen it it completely blew their minds and they went into over Drive immediately to figure it out if it was going on anywhere else to immediately shut anything down like that had a lot of briefings had a lot of um basically on platoon levels breaking down and talking about what was going on and how to fix things and I thought that was a great first step and that's a great thing that people can do is just break into your small groups um your platoon level your squad level and talk about how you interact with each other and figure out how you can change that um especially being in combat arms we we mess around there's a lot of guys sack tapping each other they play grab ass you just be sitting there they'll come credit card swipe you or like pinch your nipples it's just how guys react and I don't think being a soldier that should be tolerated it shouldn't that's not how we're supposed to do things people don't do that in a Workforce you wouldn't go to a business and just see everyone at the cashier stand touching each other it just doesn't happen and I don't understand that why we're the most professional or we pride ourselves on being the most Professional Organization yet we're the exact opposite in my opinion as far as uh soldiers go my ncos are really squared away a couple of them Rangers they knew what they were talking about and I trusted their confidence as far as drilling goes and and making sure the missions were accomplished as far as Leaders as people they were severely lacking because I feel that that is a neglected trait in the Army we don't we don't look at soldiers um as people too we need to focus on their character and two of the NC's especially I knew right off the bat that their character was severely lacking they were not good people at all and I didn't want to be associated with them I couldn't Trust them because they were consistent Liars there was no professionalism about them and I just basically did my job and then left them alone and the relationship shouldn't be like that I should always feel that I have the ability to come to my leader with any problem whatsoever at any time what made it easier with um the folks in my in the n's in my first um my first unit before they worked on your soldier skills they worked on your people skills they worked on do you have any needs with family with uh spirituality they they took care of you and they made sure you were whole as a person and that you were sound and they built a relationship where you could have open communication and things like that then they focused on your soldier task and because you had the mental stability to to push through you're not worried about things you have a clear mind you succeeded a lot more in your soldier task cuz you can focus on what you had to do and I think that really helped me um succeed because I had a lot of issues and they were just always there for me and always put themselves out there for me and I respected that more than anything when your soldiers come forward with this to you they're giving you the trust and they're trying to have some faith that you're going to take care of them and in order to do so first off you can't have any biasm whether they're uh whether sexual preference disagrees with yours whether they're male or female you have to come and respect them as a soldier and take care of them as that fact they are your soldier so we got to get rid of that stigma find out what they need first talk to them help them out even if you don't believe them you need to make an effort to try and understand where they're at and help them out to build resiliency for myself it it took a lot it took a lot of time too I was very weak I was suicidal for a little while just because I I felt that I had no one to talk to and I felt that I was alone in life and it took a lot for me to get back to to a point where I was on track I went to three different therapists um none of them really knew how to handle the situation but one was a little bit better and she took the time she wanted to give me on anxiety pills but I didn't want to be on pills I wanted to get through this myself but then she suggested just smoking and that really helped me it's bad for my health but at the same time it gives me that five minutes where I can calm down if I'm having a panic attack and just take a deep breath get myself in check and get back to work and then um my sleep has been the biggest thing that's affected I maybe get four hours a night and that's on a good night to deal with that was it's simply just accepting the fact that that's what's going to happen and I try to just calm myself down at night it's really hard um I don't know how long it's going to take me to get over that but I definitely try and um my family's been a big motivation for me and succeeding in colge is is definitely pushing me I want to take this tragic event and make something good out of it I want to be successful I want to help other people uh that this happened to and prevent it from happening again so that's been motivating me and keeping me going when I got suicidal uh I was living with one of the other victims and we just couldn't take things anymore we we were having a really hard time and it was one of our ncos who started out as a Joe with us so we I've known him since I've been in the Army and he made sure that he was always with us that he was always trying to take care of us and try and lift our Spirits in any way he can making sure that we had someone to talk to and letting us know that this yes this was a tragedy but life doesn't stop here like this it doesn't have to be the end it does get better and we can make it better so with him always being there for us and me and him just trying to push each other okay yeah today sucked but you know we we got to get through this tomorrow we got a chance tomorrow and and we did it took I think it was about two months that this was going on and he during that time alcohol was a big was a big issue um but it was whatever coping mechanism he needed I was always with him I me made sure he wasn't alone cuz I know how he felt and he did the same thing for me and having that trust and the respect for the NCO it it just kept us going it gave us some faith for soldiers and leaders that this has happened to before um my advice is first to tell someone you have you can't keep this to yourself or it will eat you alive and and it's not healthy for you you got to tell someone tell your family tell someone you trust um tell your NC's you you just got to give them the faith and just take the chance with them that it's going to get handled properly if it's not already out in public and known the the situation if it doesn't get told to someone it's going to happen to someone else and me personally I couldn't imagine giving this threat or this fate to anyone so I wanted to make sure I prevented it I I don't want you're going to not say something and then the next person it happens to they might commit suicide from it they might kill the people that happened to it you might be saving a Life by simply going forward and trying to put a stop to it I understand you think these guys are your friends and your buddies and your unit but they're not they're not supposed they're not the qualities that we want in an army and they need to get eradicated e for

Channel: U.S. Army Center for Army Leadership

Views: 802,038

Keywords: Army, CAPE, Army Profession, Trust, Hazing, Sexual Assault (Crime Type), SPC Wright

Id: 8dTrmtpeJHY

Length: 19min 47sec (1187 seconds)

Published: Fri Jan 24 2014