The Body Keeps the Score

the body keeps the score is the beautiful and suggestive title of a book published in 2014 by a dutch professor of psychiatry at boston university called bessel van der kulk the book has proved immensely significant because it emphasizes an idea that has for too long escaped psychiatrists and psychotherapists vander kulk stresses that people who are suffering emotionally are unlikely to do so just in their minds crucially their symptoms almost always show up in their bodies in the way they sit or breathe and how they hold their shoulders in their sleep patterns in their digestion processes in the way they treat their spots and in their attitude to exercise taking the body more seriously opens up new avenues for both the diagnosis and treatment of emotional unwellness instead of simply seeing a person as a disembodied mind which must talk its way to a cure a therapist is advised to see the body as a kind of score sheet of the emotional experiences that its owner has been through a scoresheet that should be read and attended to as carefully as any mental account to take one example many people who have grown up having to deal with the overwhelming rage of a parent will have learnt to suppress their own anger and their desire to hit back at those who hurt them in their minds they will have become meek and precisely attuned to fulfilling the wishes of others however unreasonable these might be but as importantly in their bodies they will have learnt to be very still almost frozen because a part of them associates the expression of anything exuberant or powerful with the risk of bringing about retaliation from others these people might sit in a particularly stiff way or have an ingrained resistance to running that has nothing to do with laziness what is at stake is a fear of one's own vitality in trying to treat such people van der kulk goes beyond advising traditional talk therapy he would also recommend that they try under the supervision of a therapeutically trained teacher kickboxing or karate competitive running or swimming sports these people might long have resisted because of a cowed relationship to their strength they might also try out rhythmically chanting or drumming thereby additionally releasing pent-up longings to assert one's right to be traumatized people tend to have bodies that are either too alert responding to every breath and touch flinching and bristling at contact or else too numb shut down heavy and immobile treatment seeks to find a more comfortable halfway house between these two extremes vanderkolk's book helps us to think anew of how to deal with people who at the start of their lives were not properly held caressed and soothed in the way that young children desperately need to be in order to feel at home in their own skin as part of their work van der kulk and his team opened up a sensory integration clinic in boston a sort of indoor playground for children and adults where one can get back in touch with a body that was not properly and by loving hands touched or cuddled gently swung from side to side or hung upside down for a giggly moment in the sensory integration clinic under the instruction of a therapist one might dive onto foam-filled mats have a roll around in a ball pool jump on a swing and balance on a beam it sounds childlike and is meant to be offering a serious chance to go back a step to correct a long-standing alienation those who were once neglected by emotionally stunted parents have often almost literally withdrawn from their bodies they own them but they do not properly live in them they might be rendered deeply uncomfortable if anyone touches their shoulders or strokes their back they might intuitively think their body was disgusting because that's how it once seemed in the eyes of those who were meant to look after them for such people vanderkulk might advise a therapeutically informed massage to help rebuild a basic trust in one's skin and limbs as he puts it he wants the body to have experiences that deeply and viscerally contradict the helplessness rage or collapse that resulted from trauma it is no doubt deeply unfortunate that a difficult past appears to give us physical as well as mental symptoms but the body's travails can in vanderkulk's optimistic account also become a source of memory and evidence when our minds have otherwise seized up or fatally doubt the legitimacy of their own feelings we can start to remember what might have happened to us by asking ourselves questions in therapy and at the same time by taking a look at how we are sitting how we breathe and how we feel when someone we love proposes to hold us then we can hope to be healed not only by wise arguments and kind voices however consoling these might be but also by dancing swaying from side to side on a gigantic swing chanting in unison or best of all surrendering ourselves to a very long and very nourishing hug from someone we have quietly dared to trust how to overcome your childhood is a book that teaches us how character is developed the concept of emotional inheritance the formation of our concepts of being good or bad and the impact of parental styles of love on the way we choose adult partners

Channel: The School of Life

Views: 2,422,153

Keywords: the school of life, schooloflife, education, relationships, alain de botton, philosophy, talk, self, improvement, big questions, love, wellness, mindfullness, psychology, how, to, hack, the body keeps the score, the body keeps the score audiobook, the body keeps the score audiobook part 1, healing trauma, bessel van der kolk, talk therapy, sensory therapy, increase immunity naturally, increase immunity for corona, mental health, whole body health, the school of life anxiety

Id: QSCXyYuT2rE

Length: 6min 3sec (363 seconds)

Published: Wed May 12 2021