The Apple Store in a Nutshell

i don't go out shopping in person too often just for the fact i sit at home like a loser playing smash head online find what i want to buy and have a kind man that actually has his life together deliver me straight to my door not to mention you can have six tabs open practically being in multiple stores at once and buy things super quickly it's definitely a lot easier but don't get me wrong i do like walking around shopping centers every now and again doing a bit of window shopping looking around clothing stores finding an item of clothing that i like seeing the price and then leaving immediately and one thing you don't get from online shopping is the experience physically walking around stores and seeing products in person or looking at storefronts is super cool and a lot more interactive and whenever i do go shopping there is always one specific store that stands out to me the apple store i mean realistically how could you miss it compared to other stores it's a giant white cube with an apple logo stuck on the front of it but it somehow always manages to entice me in now it's universally known that there are only three reasons that people go into the apple store one to buy an apple product two to repair an apple product or three to go in and play around with the funny tech for absolutely no reason or any intention of buying anything and it's usually the third just walking into the apple store is a whole experience in itself now i get apple's whole theme is like perfect and pristine but everything is white white floors white walls white screens it's blindingly bright walking into the apple store it's like opening discord light mode at 4am it's like that scene in harry potter where harry and dumbledore meet in limbo they weren't in limbo they're actually in the apple store the whole time sure it looks rad but it's borderline dystopian not to mention the staff all identically stood there in blue t-shirts like clones with an apple logo in the middle of their chest like some corporate tony stark and that weird thing around their neck that i could only assume is a digital dog tag that tracks all their vitals screen time every action they perform and how often they play angry birds all of them just walking around the store with ipads in their hands like the abstergo staff in assassin's creed black flag you might have noticed that security seems a little light around here one more time and the genius bar now sadly despite being called a bar there is no alcohol the genius bar is a help desk of sorts and it's actually pretty useful if you have quick questions or need help and no offense if you're an apple store employee but the word genius is a little bit over the top geniuses are people like albert einstein leonardo da vinci or young thug they are all geniuses not a guy in an apple t-shirt that can fix my emails by switching my iphone on and off and show me how to download smack that by acorn and apple music now from a marketing perspective apple have their store design down to a tee all the products laid out perfectly in lines on the table in sections it's like they're begging you to come over and just play with them i mean formally use and review them oh come on let's be real every human that's ever stepped foot into the apple store has around with every product in there like it's a playground it's human instinct we've all taken photos of ourselves on the ipad with stupid filters on on photo booth now there's two types of people in this scenario those that either set it as the home lock screen the braver option on display for everyone or those that save the photo to the camera roll wondering if it will stay on the ipad storage for years to come like a time capsule thinking they can return to the store 10 years later after 17 ios versions have come out and the image will still be on that ipad like chris the staff member at the apple store has gone oh no we can't delete that image because david took that back in 2014 but why is it all so fun i literally have an ipad at home but when it's right there in the apple store in front of me there's another layer of fun to it i can't help it it's like when monkeys see themselves in the mirror or running over to the imax firstly trying to work out how mac os works because that's just like a nasa launch interface then loading up safari and put it on a funny youtube video like a deviant or pulling up your own social media profile in the hopes that random strangers will give you a pity follow now i would say the same about the iphones and sure it's cool seeing the newest model in the store but you can barely lift them off the table to use them because they're attached to those metal wires and i'm too worried that even lifting them an inch will set some huge alarm off and the entire store will go into lockdown and the staff will shoot into action mode and vaporize me and if you're a real prankster here's another fun thing i like to do whenever i'm in the apple store so if you're on an iphone there's a phenomenal feature called airdrop which allows you to wirelessly transfer an image to another iphone user and believe it or not most people have this feature enabled without even knowing so being in the apple store with an iphone that has airdrop around a bunch of other people with an iphone that also have airdrop you bask in the glories you pull up an image the weirder the better open the airdrop menu and send it to every single name you see on the list whilst you sit back and watch the confusion on everyone's face like some sort of up magic trick now in recent years you of course have the newer products like the apple watch air tags or of course apple airpods and apple headphones well i recently went into the apple store and they had a big headphone display i was casually looking around when a staff member came over and asked me if i wanted to try the headphones out now this question stumped me like sure i was curious to try them but not exactly while an apple employee would be staring me dead in the eyes as music played to gauge my opinion but of course i said yes as to not be rude and quickly slip them on now at this point it made no difference what audio was coming out of those earphones it could have quite literally been a bass boosted fart compilation on full blast and it would have still nod my head like i was jamming out and claimed it was the best audio quality on the best device i've ever listened to hell i would have shook his hand and complimented his music taste as to not add any social awkwardness to the situation as i swiftly left the store and how could we forget the apple pencil a relatively new addition to the apple arsenal but whenever you see these babies on display your inner money comes out no matter how artistic or unartistic you are you're compelled to go over to an ipad and express yourself i stand there for hours working away brush strokes pencil shading smudging until voila a piece to behold before a staff member comes over and asks me to leave the store because i'm a grown man playing on all of the devices and with all of that said goodbye [Music]

Channel: Joeseppi

Views: 4,032,054

Keywords: apple, apple store, tim cook, joeseppi, joseppi, in a nutshell

Id: MCvsdcc9ocM

Length: 6min 6sec (366 seconds)

Published: Fri Jan 21 2022