Tectone’s Dad Calls Him Out on His LIES

there's this thing that you would do when I was a kid that drive me [ __ ] nuts which is uh while you were downstairs you would ask me to get you the remote even though it was right next to you right pretty much the only thing yeah I feel you have the right to do that wait a minute what was I doing when I asked you were on your exercise bike I didn't want to get off yeah and you were drinking your cracking and cup would I know where the remote was or was I asking you to get it because you put it somewhere and I couldn't find it I see what it is I never watched the remote I never watched the TV down I was very in my in my room type of kid so it's cuz you know so you guys just moved the remote to [ __ ] or maybe one of our eight eight stepmoms one of them eight stepmoms hold up what seven stepmoms how many of I had you know I'm a bad I'm a bad man but it Ain okay it's five it's five okay let's see no don't name them not do that [Music] guys welcome to steak and eggs episode 51 and uh due to whatever [ __ ] made the thumbnail of Asma Gold's dad being here on the thumbnail a couple episodes ago I decided to make it up for it by humiliating myself and bringing my actual dad to today's uh episode and you guys get to ask whenever you want uh for the viewers at home what what do you want the viewers to call you Colonel no God no no iron mic no no Mike Mike will work just fine all right cool unless they're really hot then they can call me Michael but all right it's just that simple yeah so what do you think about what he's doing um what do you mean by that the whole thing it um it was a long journey yeah and um so you what you're trying to say is that he [ __ ] around a lot before he did this no no no this was always his this was the journey he was on and society and parents yeah tried to Sidetrack him because who would have thought 15 years ago that this would be what people are doing true yeah and when he and his older brothers would be video gaming I would try to limit it to you know x amount of time and you got to earn the privilege to play and everything and looking back I feel like I was a bad parent because setting him up he didn't turn out right is I will say around High School you kind of just like this said [ __ ] it I will say that oh my parents said the same thing I no no no that's not true uh well no you let me do kind of whatever well I let you do what you wanted to do because you know life's about making decisions and then living with the results of your decision and not blaming it on somebody else and you didn't do that but I mean we're getting ahead of ourselves but when he was in high school I couldn't tell if he was in his room or at school really yeah that's how messy his room was a messy room imagine that and he was this big yeah in high school and I could look in there and I couldn't tell if he was in the bed under the bed you couldn't tell but uh and it wasn't that far to his school yeah that's one of the advantages was you could walk out the back of our quarters where we lived on the army base and it was about a 4minute walk walk to his private school yeah because he he couldn't go to the regular school because he was so big and every day he was getting into fights because this gang wanted him and this gang wanted him and did he win the fights yeah and I was afraid he was going to kill somebody uhhuh so I got him out of there before he could because as a ninth grader he was the biggest kid in the school right and as a matter of fact at the private school he went to he was the homecoming King prom King prom King ninth grade 10th grade he would have been it in 11th grade but they changed the rules and said it can only be a senior right so ninth grade 10th grade and Senior year he was prom King so three out of four three out of four and he didn't get it that other year because they just gave it to somebody else that nobody liked but right he was kind of tall yeah and now a word from our sponsors hello people of 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get 10% off your entire order by using the promo code steak and eggs 10 Link in the description thank you ER for sponsoring our podcast when um his brothers would come to visit us from college and because his brothers are a little bit older and they would they would come visit from college and U they wanted to go clubbing at the town am I allowed to say the town yeah go for it is El Paso ah yeah and if you haven't been to El Paso so you really should go it's one of the friendliest places in the world I have the exact opposite opinion I think it's a [ __ ] hole well I didn't say I didn't say that you know if you have I mean the the the I think the median income for a family of four there is $118,000 a year wow it's poor as [ __ ] yeah it's it's it's it's yeah it's poor but his brothers wanted to go clubbing and where they wanted to go clubbing you had to have a a sports jacket to go and his oldest brother could wear one of mine even though it would be a little bit short but his middle brother was like 6'3 6'4 he wasn't wearing one of my sport coats so he went into John's closet and got out John's blazer from his private school yeah so they're downtown in this club and his they're down there with army buddies and his brother goes up to the bar to get drinks because it's he's just turned 21 yeah yeah so when you just turned 21 you want to be yeah so he goes to get the drinks and there's a girl at the bar and she looks at him and he's got on this blazer with the little emblem from the school and it's kindergarten to senior in high school it's got all those grades and Sandra de o Conor the Supreme Court Justice actually went there a long long long long time ago yeah 50 years ago something like that probably more like 70 or 80 but anyway um she says to his brother when did you go to Ratford [Music] and his brother's arrogant he's arrogant and he has a he can get angry and so this girl's bothering him and he's not going to take you know what he said to her I can't repeat but it was basically leave me leave me alone you know and she's following him back to the table because she's G to take that jacket off him uhhuh because she has gone to that school well like this is some kind of Stolen Valor yeah yeah yeah it's like it's like you know somebody from Hogwarts stole your Slytherin oh [ __ ] okay I mean it a big deal and uh get back to the table and she wants that jacket she wants that jacket and uh everybody's getting kind of embarrassed and finally his brother says well it's it's John's jacket yeah she says John who and you know she says John did out on oh my God you're John's brothers and she actually knew of them oh really she knew of his brothers but had not met him because she was prom queen and he was prom King is that right when she was a senior and he was a ninth grader wow and she's now my daughter-in-law and has three of my grandkids Wait f what yeah she married his brother wait the one that was wearing the jacket yeah she married the one that's wearing the jacket they got three kids yeah it's yeah so yeah that just kind of worked out what the hell yeah it kind of worked out but it was kind of bizarre but yeah that's insane yeah growing up with these imagine marrying someone just because they knew that they were the brother of me so me that's exactly what it was John we don't need to talk about that okay we won't talk about's he's brought up two can John before you is it two cans or the bird no yeah exactly here's the deal um I used to change these diapers okay okay that's cute but that's when he was Tiny I mean by tiny I yeah of course he was young right I have not gave Ed upon his manhood since I was changing his diapers well at least now we know that yeah so but his brothers his brothers like to bring it up yeah all the time because a they're jealous because he's a half a foot taller than they are oh really yeah he is 161 and 163 6 and they hate that he was bigger than them before he was even out of high school yeah you think when you're 61 that's that's good enough I would love to be 61 you know me but I need a l just 61 but so his his brothers were were jealous and they would talk about you guys know who the yin-yang twins are right oh yeah yeah yeah okay well they would play ying-yang music on the stereo of my car I know where this is going so that people could listen right yeah yeah so people that way yeah so help everybody out and and and I'm not going to turn it off because that would imply that I actually give a [ __ ] and I'm embarrassed right you know I believe in the First Amendment and either everybody has free speech or nobody has free speech I think Ton's really enjoying at Free Speech right now at free spee the quietest he's ever been on the well I would pull up okay when they were in school one was in he was in elementary his other brother was in middle and he was other older brother was in high school and I would roll up and pick him up in my convertible whatever it was thunder thunder and uh he would get in first knowing that we were then going to go pick up his two older brothers cuz they got out a little bit later and he's like 10 years old he's throwing on the yin-yang twins right or if it wasn't yin-yang twins it was Pulp Fiction you know how the Pulp Fiction album starts with all right all you [ __ ] if anybody moves I'll kill yeah that's how it would start and he would play that as we're rolling up to the line to pick the kids up from school The Crazy Chicken the diner yeah and and you know all the the mothers are looking at me like you know what kind of father is that and right you know but hey all of my sons still talk to me is that I think you're a great dad daily so I mean and his middle brother and I we we had issues yeah that's an understatement he had he had anger issues and and justifiably so uhhuh but he directed his anger issues at the people that loved him the most yeah instead of that who actually deserve the anger and who's that who deserved it yeah figures of authority whether it was college or high school that's just you know he had a high school track coach yeah the kid was the fastest runner in the area yet his High School St track coach would put tampons in his locker that's what the coach did that's what the coach did that's just that's the way what does that mean and he's calling [ __ ] yeah the [ __ ] what his coach did that why Co did that but it got really bad bad it got bad and I went and talked to the I went and talked to the head coach and I went and talked to the principal and I said look the next time MK was his name right I said the next time MC is derogatory to my son I'm leaving the Pentagon nope I'm driving down here and I'm beating him up in front of God and everybody more well so next thing I know it's like a more brutal than that yeah it's about a week later and his older brother calls and says hey Dad John Ben's walking home because he got into it again with MC right so I get in my vehicle I leave the Pentagon I drive a couple miles through the neighborhoods there and there's my son walking home crying you see him I see him I pick him up he's he's trying not for me to see him crying but he's crying and and he's a big kid and he's really talented and he's smart and yeah we drive over and I I drive through the gate I drive across the synthetic track I drive because I'm I'm looking for the coach and there he is you know and I'm trying to run him over but you know he dodged behind the bleachers and that but yeah that was so you beat his ass or what no he got away he got away yeah and and besides they had the police there the police were there by the time I got there right right now the only thing that kept me out of jail was I'd already been to Afghanistan three times holy [ __ ] so they they cut you a little bit of how many times did you serve how many times did you deploy I got 11 combat tours oh wow holy [ __ ] well how long you been in the military I was in 41 years okay so you're out now though right yeah I've been out they they medically retired me for war wounds and um so they had kick you out 2013 yeah okay I didn't know what day of the week it was when they retired me wow I had a pretty significant head injury is that right so I would meet new people every day yeah if if I already knew them I still knew them but if I somebody knew I I and that went on for about 18 months and he was in high school when that was going on yeah I didn't know what grade he was in i' wake up every day thinking he was still in the ninth grade and he's a junior in high school and [ __ ] so yeah we kind of worked through that you were on a story talking about the yinyang twins oh the yin-yang twins so you know that one song where they go wait you the whisper song yeah the whisper song well his brothers would sing that about him and wait you see you know John's yeah and they would talk about that's where the twocan came from yeah personally I can't test one way or the other okay so what do you think about that tchon what do you think hey how about that yeah inquiring minds want to know just throw it out here listen wait what I'll explain it after I do know can you e muff Emmy I guess all right cool you don't want to hear this [ __ ] so tou was in reference to Toucan Sam and Toucan Sam is a guy who could stack two Coke cans on his dick yeah and so my brothers would call me toucan John two joh we don't know if it's true and they don't either my brothers would just talk about how [ __ ] large my dick was never having seen it okay no other male in our family has seen you know I mean when we go to Lifetime Fitness right but like I'm not giving you like I would just be pissing and my brothers would just kick in the door trying to look yeah trying make fun of it it was the weirdest [ __ ] thing I do know that the Asian businessmen that went to our gym any time John headed to the sauna they would follow him in there like you know dude the saunas are so weird Congo line I can't get used to that [ __ ] bro just seeing so much old man dick in the sauna man I don't know how people do that that come on now I'm just saying man like old men just like at a certain point they stop giving a [ __ ] they just let it hang out bro it's so annoying like watching these well you're you know you're how old are you 74 72 71 70 69 72 73 you're one of them my my next birthday which is coming up let your subscribers know my birthday is coming up in April no no no no no June June Jesus yeah I don't I'm birthday you should know what day I was born on because June 4th okay it was the day before that June okay but um yeah I'll be 73 73 yeah but uh yeah raising him and his brothers with the video game thing it was it was an adventure so you ever get pissed off CU you spending too much time playing games not doing anything in school cuz my dad used to get mad at me like that crazy I didn't believe in getting mad okay you know because that's very fair I want to keep him accountable he's being very he rarely ever got mad and if he did it was very rare occasions and it would be like 5 seconds and then I'd catch myself and go God you be an [ __ ] yeah you know because you can't take back you can't take back [ __ ] you can't take stuff back that hurts people so just don't say it in the first place right yeah you know because then you don't have to take it back and just you know but no he I would get frustrated but he had a mother that was so mean to everybody I mean really like yeah that I just I said man I God stop that no we're not so you just let him do whatever the [ __ ] because you feel like man they are getting well no I just figured that if they were going to do it we'd do it together yeah and you know we'd do it together yeah I kept him occupied pretty much and so there wasn't and if if his buddies wanted to play video games all week they'd come to our house and play video games all week and stuff like that was fun there was one time he he was I think he was was a senior but his little buddies were a little bit younger and they were little I mean even though they were close in age they weren't anywhere near in stature right and um I was bless you thank you or no salute salute Salud Sal Spanish Sal thank you and um I used to keep cracking rum in the freezer oh [ __ ] because you know you never know when something piss me off and I'd just go have a shot of cold cracking and get back on my exercise bike yeah and uh it would calm me down because I didn't want to take the meds that they wanted me to take uhuh because the you know the side effects of the meds they give you to keep you from being angry you don't want the side effects it makes you more angry but he came in and and he said I I was I went to bed about 9:00 CU I was getting up the next morning to run and it was very rare to see my dad without a Jack and Coke like at all times is that Jack oh yeah Kraken and Coke that's right that's right Jack and Coke yeah sorry my bad yeah that's what I would get at the bars when they would think I was 21 yeah they they would we we drank he drank all over Austin at the age of 19 that [ __ ] was awesome he came in he said hey Dad is it is it okay if my buddies and I damn have a kraken yeah and I said I don't know call their parents and if their parents tell me it's okay yeah it's okay gives a [ __ ] but their parents cuz this is Texas yeah and in Texas you can buy your kid a drink right at a bar it's not against the law if it's your kid you can buy him a drink and so he came back and said yeah the the parents said it's okay and I go to bed and uh I get up the next morning I walk out and man there's vomit starting there there's just vomit everywhere damn and it's that brown brown vomit there's chunks in it I'm going what the you know yeah and he comes out of his bedroom and he's all apolog to Dad I said it's okay I'll get it cleaned up no no no so what happened was I said Dad I'm so so vomit V I said I'll get it cleaned up and then I go in his bathroom to get a towel to start cuz I'm going to use a dirty I'm not going to get clean towels I'm going to go get dirty towels and clean the vomit up with the dirty towels right and I I go in his bathroom and his two buddies that spent the night yeah one of them's in the bathtub in the fetal position and the other 's on the floor next to the toilet in the fetal position neither one of them's got any clothes on and there's vomit everywhere there's vomit everywhere so so wait were you in this same house like the night before whenever this [ __ ] happened yeah but I was you slept through the whole thing I'm okay I'm deaf in this ear right and so if I sleep on this ear I don't hear anything so you didn't even know this [ __ ] happened they could have been partying having all of crazy no idea I did not party at all when I was I did not party I was on a partyer the text to the story of why we did this is insane we don't have to get into that okay yeah it wasn't about that mother that kept trying to give me money was it well that's kind of related this guy would date these girls and their mothers would come over and want to give me money for what I don't know because we never we never got I was too afraid to find out right because you know some things you don't want to know yeah you know some things you just want to like if people give you money they want something out of it let me get out of here you know I mean one of the mothers came and she had a large amount of money she wanted me to lock up in my safe $25,000 yeah but what the [ __ ] but but remember we're on the border y we're on the border right cuz this is we're on the border I don't look like I said I got 11 combat tours I've been shot I've been blown up I've been stabbed but you got to be an idiot to [ __ ] with the cartel okay you you got to be stupid if you think you're batter than the cartel the president of Mexico was on the news today talking about I don't [ __ ] with the cartel that's America's problem not mine so when these I mean the cartel was but the unwritten rule in El Paso was the cartel didn't commit crimes in El Paso yeah the crimes were all in Warz and you know El Paso was kind of like neutral ground but every now and then something would happen he had classmates that got their heads cut off damn really yeah remember what remember the Death Note kid yeah yeah yeah he they got him what' they get him for his parents were muing drugs him at the border so they got him they got him he got caught up between a drug deal yeah the parents weren't going back across but it was rough so I didn't want to get involved in that because you know there were rumors right and I don't know if the rumors were true but I don't need to know I just didn't want to be involved with it yeah I wasn't trying to be a hardass or anything but you know I didn't didn't want to get killed by Thug walking down the street in El Paso just walked up behind me and shived me so but I I love El Paso I I could live there now it was some of the nicest people that I ever met were were from El Paso but yeah that was yeah I don't know that they were partying but that brings up another story yeah once I want to say he cleaned up all the vomit I did I cleaned it all by himself yeah I got OCD I can clean he didn't complain at all what a good dad yes well I mean I've been there I was on the other side of that vomit when you know I mean I was a lifeguard in Daytona Beach when I was 14 years old and the London Symphony Orchestra would come to Daytona and Mia pharoh the actress was married to the conductor of the London Symphony Orchestra a guy named Andre prevan yeah and uh they would come and they would party and you know you're the Lifeguard they hand you a margarita you're drinking it it is what it is it is what it is you're the Lifeguard you do whatever they tell you to do cuz you're hoping in those days you were hoping to get a $10 tip for lifeguarding their pool party and stuff and I can remember walking the three miles from from the beach to my parents house hardly able to walk a straight line I was so drunk at that at that age and you know so so I wanted to uh get you on a story because I want to tell you something I've never told you before because there's a lot of times you tell stories you don't understand the context cry you guys understand I'm vulnerable right now right yeah a yeah I lost my service dog of 10 years a week ago damn I'm having I'm having difficulty dealing with it and then the VA turns around tells me I'm too old to get another dog what is that ridiculous I am I should get two yeah should have worked the opposite yeah so okay when when I was a kid I had to talk pretty loud right because if I didn't talk loud you know I wouldn't hear it wouldn't hear it yeah so I've gotten used my whole life just [ __ ] talking at 11 but uh you know there's this thing that you would do when I was a kid that drive me [ __ ] nuts which is uh while you were downstairs you would ask me to get you the remote even though it was right next to you right pretty much the only thing yeah I feel you have the right to do that wait a minute what was I doing when I asked you were on your exercise bike I didn't want to get off yeah and you were drinking your cracken and cup would I know where the remote was or was I asking you to get it because you put it somewhere and I couldn't find it I I see what it is I never watched the remote I never watched the TV down I was very in my in my room type of kid so it's cuz you know so you guys just mov the remote to [ __ ] with me or or maybe one of our eight eight stepmoms one of them eight stepmoms hold up what seven stepmoms how many I had you know I'm a bad I'm a bad man but it Ain okay it's five is it it's five okay let's see G no don't name them not do that okay I I I remember more than that but maybe you five there was five okay all right maybe they're girlfriends who knows regardless that doesn't count well like so all right so teon said that whenever he was in high school you had a separate apartment for them to be at so you could have privacy with your own apartment fourth grade fourth grade four wait that was fourth grade okay all right that's not untrue but that is a misrepresentation of the truth so what was it okay the truth was that I was at the Pentagon and he and his brothers came to live with me okay and I was in a one-bedroom apartment yeah with someone right when they came the worst woman in human history oh really is that true no in my opinion worse no and we're not going to do that we're not going to do that we're not going to do that sure no seriously that's that's wrong they're not here to defend themselves but the reason he and his brothers had a different apartment right was because I had a one bedroom okay and they only had one bedrooms and two bedrooms yeah so he and his brothers went into a two-bedroom that was down the hall until 4 months later when we moved to a house okay together all right so yes he and his brothers were in an apartment but it wasn't because of anything other than I wasn't in an apartment that that you could legally have five quote adults in so you were you were working at the Pentagon Den he's in fourth grade so like I do some math in my head you you tell me earlier you were at the Pentagon whenever 911 happened yeah that [ __ ] is crazy what happened um well it's can you say yeah I mean you know some 19 saudy Nationals and one Pakistani guy right got on airplanes they've been training at flight centers all around America they didn't know how to land they just knew how to take off and they they crashed airplanes into buildings damn and and my two older Sons were going to this high school called 71st High School uhuh and President Obama would go there and because it was the most diverse high school in America but they weren't they were gone from there by then but this was in 2001 2002 and and originally I was reported as missing presumed dead because the meeting that I was supposed to be in is where the plane impacted the building but I wasn't there I was at Starbucks across the street when my secretary called and said you know where are you you supposed to be in this meeting and I was rushing back to go to the meeting and I came out of a pedestrian tunnel underneath the interstate there in DC and I heard Godzilla off to my left and I looked and it wasn't Godzilla it was an airliner and it came over the little highway there hit the ground to the east to the west of the Pentagon bounced and then went into the west side of the Pentagon wow and so I was in the building helping get casualties out cell phones didn't work so his older brothers couldn't get a hold of me and the Army listed me as missing in action I wasn't but his brothers were going to school with the Sai and Pakistani ambassadors kids and must awward they were running cross country with them at this point in time we don't know who was on the airplanes okay initially we didn't know who was on those airplanes yeah and um anyway these these kids were telling my two old sons that America deserved 911 oh oh no because of our tolerance of homosexuals damn yeah so when I finally showed back up and I'm talking to my sons they're asking permission to beat these kids up and that's when I told him I said look either everybody has free speech or nobody has free speech yeah you can't pick and choose who gets to say what they want based on whether you like it or dislike it or whether you like or dislike them yeah either we all have rights or nobody has rights and so that was I said the only time you're allowed to put your hands on somebody uhhuh is either a they've put their hands on you there it is or B they've told you they're going to put their hands on you before we get too off track I was telling you earlier about how uh you know you asked remote would just be so [ __ ] irritating right so I want to go back here we're getting some we're getting some the reason I would ask him to come get the remote it was the only exercise the fat little [ __ ] would do oh is that right that's why I would say John come get the remote cuz that was it he'd disappear into his room and he come out a week later and the maid would go up and empty out all the slim gyms and everything else was up the PC oh God wait wait wait wait okay okay so I'm proud of this start playing Wild yeah I was his his two older brothers had girlfriends right now they eventually they eventually married these girls right and um oh [ __ ] they're trying to suck up to me because they want me to appreciate them being with my sons and I was just happy any girl was with my sons you know they were socially inept and I was just thrilled to see yeah they are I was just thrilled to see any woman put up with them and and they have wonderful wives but but anyway these these two women or I don't know what the proper term is I mean they were young so I guess I could say they were still girls right whatever yeah but they were young I mean they were probably T they came and they asked me if they could clean his room yeah because the maid just couldn't get in there right I had a maid but she couldn't get in there so they she didn't even want to do it was it that no no she could not get in there she physic couldn't get physically show if I show you a picture of my room can you tell me if his was worse yeah okay yo can we pull up the picture of like we have a is like in front of it well I mean honestly you could do any of them right just search asmin Gold Room are any of your cups in your room filled with pit stop I'm telling a story man sorry you got to chill yeah I want okay so this one right so tell me oh that's nothing compared to his room oh is that a [ __ ] that's czy that is organized organ what was preventing from getting in cuz you say they physically couldn't there so much stuff then how did he get in he's strong I also just wouldn't leave I also had two extra I had an extra door and okay now get you got bonus door there was a door that went outside and then there was a door that went to the bathroom yeah and the kitchen and all that stuff so the door that went to the bathroom was the one the maid couldn't get in mhm and the maid was afraid to go in the backyard because there were road runners back there and uh so anyway way these two young women they say can we clean John's room now I'm thinking well if I say no they're going to think that I don't approve of them right or that I don't think they know how to because they're wanting to demonstrate their domestic skills of course natur you they want me to know that they will take good care of my sons and so I I think I go yeah throw that back up that's giving me inspiration so I tell them yeah yeah sure go ahead so they're in there cleaning and I mean they're they're in there they're in there they're in there right they're in there some more and then they call me to the kitchen yeah and they've got like 15 or 20 Coke cans sitting on the counter yeah they're all open and they ask me what do I want them to do with the Coke cans I said well throw them away they go well they're still full of coke oh [ __ ] and I go oh I go I don't think that's Coke and then they go to pour one out and they realize that those Coke cans are all full of urine right right these girls about died damn you know because they were moving that and they were but they just thought it was coke spilling on them and stuff yeah it was 19 or it was a whole bunch of Coke cans full and and it was only 10 feet from his computer screen to the bathroom but what you have to understand is when you're raiding in World of Warcraft and you're in the middle of a fight you can't just leave so why had you ever did you ever take a sip out the wrong one absolutely oh man that's recycling no no I told you remember I had the spit cup too hey Gandhi did it yeah you know if Gandhi could do it anybody can right so he's basically Gandhi that's right I mean that's just how it is that's right yeah it is a POS got the haircut uhhuh definitely got the haircut but yeah he um and then they were I don't think we should talk about what was on the walls right the [ __ ] yeah that out what yeah c yeah damn and they didn't know what it was and they asked his brothers and and and it was up there damn it was up there that sh was on the computer screen it was up there it was up there so how old was he how old were you I was like Junior Senior High School normal K so he is it what no is that normal I threw up on my floor I never cleaned it up day that's wrong guy actually see I have OCD so I can't do that is there a normal guy here Jay is that normal I'm normal okay he said no okay that's not true there's a difference between what is normal and what is abnormal okay that is a normal thing that happens with teenage boys you got to piss in the can but it's not abnormal yeah I mean you wouldn't want to do it but it's it's not it's not AB it's not uncommon it's just it's very common okay when we started playing Pokémon go back in 2016 his his brother's Pokemon name was what beat sock right and I didn't know what that was I know what it is I didn't know what it was but we're at a raid and one of the other people raiding reported his brother to Niantic and Niantic said either change your stream name from beat sock from beat sock or we're going to have to ban you're tracking you're tracking beat sock right yeah what do you mean I'm tracking beat sock like you know what that means yeah he knows what it means I make of course I know what it [ __ ] means yeah yeah but another story about I want to tell you what I'm getting out here okay okay so like you would say that I was a pretty good son i' say you were a great son all right cool and I your your relationship with your dad did you ever do any crazy [ __ ] whenever he would like piss you off my dad my dad beat me every day until I got kicked out of house when I was 16 okay no I didn't do crazy I mean I I spoke up for myself yeah which I guess in hindsight was probably crazy CU it got me beat yeah and you can't believe how many misprints there were in the World Almanac every year uhuh when we be talking about who won the batting title for the national league or the American League and I'd show it to my dad in the world Almanac yeah and I'd get hit for arguing with him and it was obviously a misprint so no I I didn't I didn't I didn't mess with my dad so so I messed with you twice you did I don't think you ever knew about it of course I did just only twice and it was when it was when we were living uh I think maybe once in El Paso and one in Austin right so I was probably like 18 the other time I was like 15 right CU you know I was a pretty crazy kid I was always playing video games you know uh you remember Spike our cat Spike yeah who the [ __ ] names a cat Spike that's a dog's name I think that's cute I didn't name him Spike you did you you you gotta meet this cat is that right this cat would [ __ ] up dogs this cat was vicious he was big he was big he didn't mess he would fight anything what the [ __ ] yeah he was a cool cat go I I I want to clear my conscience because I never told you about this you ever noticed that Spike would take really big [ __ ] pisses like every now and then you be like damn buddy I didn't know what cat could piss this much you what you were hiding these litter boxes no I would piss in his litter box oh so he wouldn't go in there so you would have to clean the PS out of this litter box so that I would oh I didn't clean that litter Bo they did free ohe not speaking of this speaking of this m God so I'm there and I can't keep up with him wa handshake said we're all good okay there's one more you got to tell me about anyway so same thing twice oh I couldn't keep up with him keeping things clean yeah so I I always needed a maid and you know I'd still vacuum the house every day cuz we had cats and Cat litters vacuum so but we had a made and so I put an advertisement on Craigslist in El Paso and this girl shows up and uh she's got on her volleyball uniform because she's come from volleyball practice all right and we're talking and you know she's a Setter she's tall and um what was her name I don't going to say name okay oh right we shouldn't do that can't say her name but anyway she came and you know I I I asked her what year she was and she said she was a junior so you know Junior UTEP you know plays volleyball at UTEP and so she's looking at my house and um it's five-bedroom house it was not fancy or anything it was on the military base I said can you clean it she says yeah I said okay what do you want she says well $25 a week and I Saidi I I can't I can't pay you $25 a week you know I got three sons and she thought that that meant that the sons were helping clean she says well how about 20 I said no no you don't understand I can't pay you less than $100 a week to clean up after my pig Sons so $100 a week and to which she then replies Colonel I only clean yeah oh my God yeah so she thought damn not that that's so but so I'm thinking she's a junior in college right right no after she's been cleaning for us like a year yeah we find out that she's a junior in high school oh yeah and she had a crush on his older brother yeah who was getting weak what do they get are they married now too no I had I had the letter I had the letter no she was she wasn't of age and he was in the Army oh my God so I had I had the cut sing of Po but that girl would clean but she could never get in she tried to get in John's room a couple times she couldn't make it happen yeah damn couldn't make it happen and sometimes there' be two or three kids in there right that you wouldn't be able to see you look in and you couldn't tell there was anybody in there and then the assistant principal from the high school would call and ask me was there at my house and then that's when I'd go in and I'd start poking right and then I'd get a response so they'd be trying to hide in there under the garbage trying to hide they would just be sleeping so where's the where's the picture of this I got to see this [ __ ] oh no that's neat no no but I want to see his like if you say it's that bad you it was beyond that bad there's no chance there's no pictures there's no pictures the house burnt down oh well that probably was a good thing the house I was deployed I was in Afghanistan yeah and he and his his middle brother are in the house because the older brother who was also in the Army was at Ranger school at the time and um there was a shortage in the microwave in the kitchen and it started an attic fire okay and so they they got out then we had we had to go back in well they they got out and then they're they're bragging that they went back in to get spiked like firefighters they went back in to get spiked the cat and I'm supposed to be proud of him for going back in I said I'm not proud of you for going back in I'm upset that you left without him in the first place right then initating that you had to go back and find him in the smoke and the fire you shouldn't have gone out without him to be fair I was not the one who complained about that that was my brother did they get the cat though yeah but it was in his room and they couldn't find it no it was in the laundry room I thought he was in your bedroom back door he was in the carrier um next to the laundry room yeah that was the house burnt down and and the neighbor saw as naked and they were hot as [ __ ] so that that was embarrassing as [ __ ] and and I'm getting calls from the you know the colonel that was the quote commander of the housing area why do I have these Sons living alone I said what are you talking about two of them are army officers and the other ones a senior or junior in high school they're not alone [ __ ] [ __ ] and can we do you feel comfortable telling the story about ordering pizza or no oh [ __ ] from Florida yeah no we don't need to do that I mean basically what happened was all I'll say it so that way you don't have to worry about nothing well okay yeah you I'm going keep it vague yeah keep it vague over our family attempting to order a pizza it was a reunion every everybody was at my house in Florida like how how many people oh barely maybe maybe like seven or eight seven or no no no no no there was and I we can't well let's not name names there's two of us then three with the other one and there was there was you and what's your face yeah maybe maybe 10 or 11 and then there was me and what's your face yeah that's four yeah and then there was with three more so that's yeah so that's eight and then there was so that was 11 and then there was your Aunt Karen and your Uncle Bruce I think I think they were there everybody was there there was 15 or 20 people there guys we have never had and here's what I do I just Emmy what do you want to eat you tell me what you want yeah as what do you want you tell me what you want every time it doesn't have to be you don't have to get pizza if he wants Sushi yeah I just go around he would never he would pay for it I just go around I find out what everybody wants and then I I called the because I'm you know I'm from there so I know the good restaurants and i' get it and everybody get what they want and I don't have to worry about it right yeah but let's just say this one brother oh if you're sure you want to say it this one brother I'm not going to say names this one brother wanted pizza from a pizza place and it was a pizza place that I didn't know and I said well it's probably not very good if I don't know it let me ask let me ask your Aunt Karen and she's never left Daytona Beach been there for 60 years okay and she's in the school system and her husband's the editorial cartoonist for the newspaper so and they don't have kids so they eat out all the time and they're big so they know where the good food is so I said Karen do you know this and she didn't know it no I've never heard of that so I say to my son I said well everybody says that they don't know that place why don't you let me get pizza from mari's cuz it's the best [ __ ] pizza I've ever eaten he didn't want that he wanted this pizza so okay got it so I go around and I get everybody's order and I know the phone numbers for all like you want sushi I know where you want a sub I know where you want fried chicken I knowwhere but I didn't know this pizza place so I say to my son hey do you have the phone number right do you have the phone number to the pizza place yeah right simple M oh my God man I thought I was getting my head cut off right I'm not kidding you okay I'll say then over I've never had a family reunion that did not end in somebody think they're going to die every single one our family our family legit I never thought I was dying okay somebody thought we like literally I would try my hardest to avoid every single family reunion because it would be [ __ ] terrifying over Pizza guns yeah guns were P out [ __ ] Pizza the scariest thing about my family to for a year and a half yes over this [ __ ] but that's all it's all it's all gone now and everything's great besides my dad you know well there was like a couple years where your emotions were a little out of control when you came back from deployment but other than that the scar had me medicated yes the scari thing about my family is yeah they can be fine they can be happy yeah within the split seconds but then yeah out of [ __ ] nowhere Blind Fury wow throwing hands throwing fists pulling out [ __ ] guns that is scary it was [ __ ] saw guns and I'm God I'm glad for you I never saw guns yeah okay okay well and I never saw him fight right I I never saw him fight I know that I'm trying to think when he was younger his brothers because they were older yeah and he was I I don't mean to be I'm not trying to offend anybody this is a true statement sure he was chubby he's a fat ass yeah and his brothers as a matter of fact his stomach uhhuh had its own name what Ralph damn he would say that's bad he would say Ralph needs you know this Ral the first two things he learned to say the first two phrases he ever knew were FR fry Coke Sheen fren fries FR fries Cen kokeen frien fren fries and he knew where they were he' Point them out to be fair I had to learn how to be very adorable very quickly I had to learn how to manipulate people but his brothers would pinch him and tickle him and and you know when you're the one being tickled it's pretty it's not fun but when you're the one doing the tickling oh we're just playing it ain't playing to the person getting tickled you do you remember when I took us all to Cracker Barrel I came down and I took you a Cracker Barrel and I paid for it because when you were a kid you paid for literally every meal didn't matter who they were You' pay for every single person's meal but then I took you to Crocker barrel and I paid for it and I showed you my PayPal of me getting $1,000 for my first pay from I remember that that one of the proudest days of my life man that was a big deal so I am curious how was it versus when you saw that I started to do content creation versus what I am now which is you know like it's my full-time career you have to understand that I didn't really understand content creation yeah I still don't move you this way I mean I I know what you guys do and it amazes me yeah I mean you know I mean I I sort of can get my brain around these these Gamers that do a game and they stream about that game and they you know tell you people like watching the game yeah and and and they tell you how to get [ __ ] like you know I've got a buddy in Singapore that's one of the Pokemon go guys I think he's the best guy in the world I won't mention his name but he's a great guy I mean he'll come to events and spend hours just talking to little kids and and he wears sweatpants and a t-shirt not like a Minecraft Youtuber like a normal talking to kids and just you know just talking to him about you know what's your favorite Pokemon well here I'll trade you one from Singapore that kind of stuff just a super nice guy and and he makes a good amount of money doing that I bet um but Niantic bans him now and then what yeah because you know they got he was promising people that he would get him a hundo uhuh you know give me your account info and I'll play till I get you a hyundo yeah for anybody whoes know what a hundo is 100% Pokemon like he wasn't cheating to get him he's just that good player and he plays all the time and he drives around playing and he would just go find it he would do the work yeah well Niantic didn't like that so they banned him for 30 days sharing of course right but he wasn't hurting anybody and you know but anyway so he got banned but I understand that part right but a lot of this other stuff that the content creators do I just you know like what what is the thing that you I don't know how you guys can get online and do this podcast without writers you know it's amaz it amazes me well I I mean did you need a writer to say everything you said I'm doing it just today right I don't know that I could well okay I can do it every day but I'm 72 right and I was in the military 41 years and I did a lot of other stuff right so yeah but I mean he's not even well he just he's not yeah he just turned 30 yeah I mean where you guys come up with this stuff crap happening there's so much stupid [ __ ] that happens all the time and the one thing is that people are dumb as [ __ ] on the internet and so you will always have the next thing to think about the next thing to talk about and that will never not be true there's always something new in the news like yeah especially them too I hate every day when I turn my phone on and look at the news really I hate it I mean I've got 10 grandkids and two great grandkids wow and I feel I know that I feel bad s cuz I I look at where they're growing up into this world hey look it was rough when I was a kid and it was civil rights oh yeah and it was the Vietnam War it was rough and I didn't think it could ever approach that again so where's it at now compared to that you were able to govern because the parties would find common ground and they would govern but but that now that's not the case anymore I mean you know everybody says Bill Clinton was a great president yeah but that's because n Gingrich the speaker of the house oh yeah he and Clinton would compromise yeah they don't do that anymore everything's so polarized between way over here and way over here and there's very few people in the middle and it's tearing the country apart and how they govern is they make me afraid of you and you afraid of her and they play us you know they play us all against one another like everybody's got their own private agenda yeah and I mean yes there are people out there that want to represent a demographic and those people have an agenda all they do because they're making money off representing that demographic and they got power representing that demographic and you know the so I I was in FL for the 2020 election okay the one that was rigged and uh and uh I I I gotta be honest I I don't think I can ever go back to Florida you think so it was so divisive yeah I mean people that had been neighbors and friends for 50 years were burning bags of dog [ __ ] in their neighbor yards whether they had a blue sign or a red sign so you are you 72 how the [ __ ] did that happen cuz you said it wasn't like that before right so how how did we get here well I mean you think it's like social media like social media has a huge really because people are more informed well they're okay informed no no no they're not more informed there's just more information that they have access to that they believe because it's there it's it's on there they believe it yeah like people ask me do I think the 20 20 election was rigged uhhuh my answer to that is I don't know yeah but I wouldn't want to stake my life on yes or no as the answer because I don't know but I'll tell you one thing I do know right it is a historical fact uh that Joe Kennedy bought Illinois Chicago for Jack Kennedy and that's how Jack Kennedy won the 1960 election that is a fact that is a fact but you do what you got to do exactly so for for people to be indignant we're sitting out here all we get to know is what we see on the news and maybe what somebody tells us and the News isn't news anymore it's spin everybody's spinning when did that start CU my dad said it happened like at the time of Vietnam I don't know we had Walter kronite during Vietnam and he was of America yeah he was the CBS news guy he you know I know the story yeah he I the real spinning started I mean the real real real spinning yeah probably started after 911 you think that's what it was I think that's when it got really out of control because that was crazy after that happened yeah I remember that you know and and look you remember airports before 911 what airports before 911 or two times airports oh do I remember airports yeah you remember the one time I screamed I had a bomb when I was at airport no I don't remember that was crazy bro I was yeah I was you yeah you grabbed me I did I was in like fourth grade and I was playing a video game right oh and then I had a soda can right and I went to go you know throw it in the trash can and I just yell frag out right like I had a frag bomb and yeah that was insane that was really [ __ ] stupid 11 stuff started getting spun and I mean look everybody likes to denigrate President Bush uhhuh because we never found wmds never did but I tell you what I was on the ground is that right we absolutely believed there were wmds yeah and I will tell you this from firsthand knowledge uhuh Saddam Hussein yeah he believed he had a nuclear weapons program believed it yeah now he was being lied to but you know we're sitting over here if we think he if if if our information tells us and then he thinks he thinks it he thinks it he thinks he's got it how right so was it all a big mistake absolutely because every night on the Nightly News you had stuff on there that recruited terrorists to hate America oh that still happens yeah yeah it goes on every day you you can't yeah there's movies about it you know and look we either care about each other yeah or we don't and if we don't there's no there's no saving us I think people just lost their minds you know especially like after covid I think Co really dialed it up a lot because like people spend two years in their house getting radicalized by the internet and then you let them loose and they're just going to go ape [ __ ] like I can't wait for this election this election is probably going to be worse than the last one talking about the elections oh boy talking about the election to buy a drink in a bar yeah you got to show an ID yeah why are people upset about having to show an ID to vote who the [ __ ] knows I don't understand that yeah I mean you're you're going to vote people think that they're oh I'm I'm Brown you don't want me to vote if you look at the polls yeah they're going to all go vote for the guy that just got out of court today because they identify with him now because oh yeah they're identifying with him because he's being persecuted uhhuh so I mean I don't understand why everybody gets upset about showing an idea because all they're wanting to do is to make sure that I'm voting for the representative that represents where I live and not where you live I think the reason why is every single issue every single thing there are two sides of it and there's like sometimes there are just things that make sense that half of people get convinced into getting in a fight about it that's what I think happens I I know they hate each other oh they do it's it's I mean and our kids watch it yeah you know I mean God and I like I you have social media I worry about my grandkids yeah well do you do you use social media or anything like that you mean do I have like accounts yeah like Twitter Facebook [ __ ] like that yeah I have Facebook because I have to have Facebook to have Facebook Messenger so we can organize Pokemon go raids okay so you basically don't have social media I don't I don't I don't I mean somebody ask me a question about where's the Pokemon go raid and all which I will say if we don't talk about it uh Pokemon go is the best thing to happen to my dad is that right well here's a truth this is okay so when I retired from the military yeah I was I was I was angry uhhuh but I didn't know that I was angry yeah you know what I mean and um they don't call it paranoia they call it hypervigilance yeah they don't call you're not paranoid you're hypervigilant and uh so I unless he was home yeah I didn't go out I didn't go places by myself uhhuh and and if he was around or one of his brothers was around then then we'd go out but I wouldn't go out by myself and um the the few times that I did bad stuff happened oh um like I was I was at the Target down on Slaughter Lane I remember this I was at the Target down on Slaughter Lane because I you know my my VA psychiatrist yeah would ask me you know was I socializing and so I would go and get coffee at the target from the Starbucks and i' the one at South Park Meadows yeah yeah and I'd ask the you know the bar's got her name on and then I'd tell my psch yeah I was talking to Sarah I wouldn't tell him that Sarah was the Barista at Starbucks right or I I talked to Jeff you know another Barista at Starbucks I wasn't talking to very many people and then I was in that Starbucks and the girl there said to me or the lady the woman you know she was a teenager she said that she was real happy because it was a Thursday and she said it was her Friday and it was a Thursday before the midterm elections in 2014 uhhuh and I said well you know me I'm retired army every day Saturday and she laughed and then this voice from around the corner says referring to President Obama in the very most negative terms you can imagine oh I can imagine so he's referring to President Obama saying that President Obama was going to steal my military retirement to help pay for he must have seen that on a YouTube video but he saw it and he said it yeah and and I just said hey yo bud there's women and kids here chill and then he called the president of the liar uhuh and I said hey bud you know the weatherman's wrong half the time it doesn't make him a liar it makes him mistaken perhaps the president was mistaken about you know his his the information he got he interpreted it wrong that doesn't make him a liar it just makes him wrong people [ __ ] up you know we all make mistakes and then he tells me is going to beat me up oh okay he's a big boy but but you were like you were how old was he oh he was 22 I think so you were 60 years old he trying to get in fight with a 60-year old man at a Starbucks and a Target he going to beat me up that what's so crazy it's like I feel like that is the most chill Target like everywhere around there like where the [ __ ] did this dude come from that Target too Texas Texas is where we won't mention the University in Texas that he had the sweatshirt on for but yeah but so I you know I I had to put him down on the ground and really yeah and U the store manager wanted me to let him up and I said I can't let him up till the police get here he's too big and now he knows I can put him down there so now I don't have the advantage of surprise yeah so let's just chill to so the police come and the manager's over there complaining about me but there's there's all these mothers over there and the barista's talking to the other police and finally the sergeant that shows up comes up and says can you make court on the 9th of December oh I said man you got to charge me he said ' no no no we're charging him yeah I said really he said yeah he's facing four felony charges wa how assault on somebody over the age of 65 battery on somebody over the age of 65 assault on 100% disabled veteran and Battery on 100% disabled veteran those are all Class C felonies in Texas so what happened well I went to court and you know at at that point in time I didn't know what kind of sentences the kid was facing right and he's there with these parents and you know the judge thanks me for my service and you know and says all those glowing things that people say when they're trying to make a point and he asked me what kind of sentence Did I think the kid deserved and I said I don't know your honor what are what are the options and he says well seven seven seven and seven and I said weeks months he says no years I said you're honor I don't I don't think anybody deserves 28 years in prison I don't care what they did unless it was you know murdering little kids or something some crazy [ __ ] but no he he he doesn't need to go to prison for years how about just 28 days yeah and he said okay thank you that was it I sit down tells the kid to stand up kid stands up with his lawyer and his dad and the kid turns and looks at me and says I will find you old man I am gonna [ __ ] you up and so the judge gave him seven years [ __ ] him yeah what a stupid he's out yeah's I don't think he did very a kid a kid that has that kind of anger issues is probably still in he probably got himself involved in something else he'll be back I mean I just didn't go out unless he was with me or one of his brothers and I'd get my service dog and that helped a lot yeah because not only did she help me not fall all the time but she would let me know if somebody was an issue and she would turn me away right and she'd see if there was an excitable dog and she would get between me and them so that because if somebody bumps me I'll fall yeah so she took good care of me and I I got more comfortable with going out uhhuh and then in July of 2016 I was in San Marcos and um my granddaughter who was just turned four MH she had turned four on 31 May uh she calls me up and she said grandpa grandpa I need you to take me for a walk okay so I go get her and we're walking around campus and he had told me about Pokemon go yeah he had told me I needed to play it but I had never played a video game you did of any you played uh Tiger Woods Golf you got and they cheated they knew the codes and and I'm sitting there hitting it and they're doing codes and putting rockets on the balls you played donkey Conga I never played that no we played the Guitar Hero rock bands yeah and you guys got mad because I mean I could do that one because those were all songs I lived with so there you know I knew how but but anyway so she wanted that's not why we got mad she wanted to go for a walk oh you got mad and went to your room no I got mad that's not the reason though okay you were mad annoying so uh that's what it was so uh we're walking around the campus and she's got her little iPhone and she's four years and a month and I said Luchi what are you doing she gra about playing Pokemon go don't tell Mommy well my rule is a grandparent is as long as it's not hurtful I give my grandkids whatever they want yeah it's my job to spoil it's their parents' job to raise them yeah so you know so if they say they can have one dress we get seven you know one pair of shoes we get five or six so uh we're walking around and she's playing and she says Grandpa give me your phone so I give her my phone my iPhone and she goes into the App Store and down she's four yeah and she downloads the game and says what you want your name to be and I didn't know so she named me after the cat that we had Spike cuz he had just died so she named me after Spike yeah but then I had to put a number on it because somebody already had it so she what's you lucky number and I said 21 so that's how I became you know Iron Spike 21 and uh so we're playing and I didn't how to play I mean I knew about Pokemon because they collected the cards yeah but I knew Pikachu and Charizard that was all I knew I knew that Ash was from Pallet Town but I didn't know anything else but I'm playing with my granddaughter I didn't care and we I'd get her every day after she did whatever class she was doing you know ballet gymnastics piano she i' get her and I'd get her for an hour and a half and then I'd take her home and she'd take a nap and then her and her dad my oldest son would come out in the evenings there and you remember how the game was in 2016 everybody was everybody was playing and we're at San Marcos and it was great and it was fun oh like at Texas State Texas state it was great and I'm playing but I sucked okay I mean I couldn't throw a curve I didn't know eggs had to go in incubators I actually went to the Apple Store bitching about my GPS cuz my eggs wouldn't hatch and the girl says well you got to put them in incubators yeah where the [ __ ] you get those you know I didn't know there was a store I didn't know there was a pokedex I didn't I just caught what I could catch and I'm playing and so after about six weeks she's like a level 32 and I'm a six oh okay but I didn't care I'm just playing with her I didn't I didn't give a [ __ ] yeah and we're walking around campus and she's bilingual and uh she's talking to some co-eds cuz classes are starting again yeah you know it's like late August early September and she's talking to these girls and she comes run it up and she says Grandpa Grandpa do you know what those girls said I said no Luchi what did they say she Grandpa they said I'm a Pokemon master I said you sure are Grandpa's really proud of you and we turned to walk away and the girls yelled at us and it was in Spanish and I understood two words yeah abuo you know Grandpa and Pokémon go uhhuh I didn't understand the rest of it cuz I just didn't hear it and she takes my hand she says Grandpa you know what they said about you and I'm thinking they said watch out for the pervert or something like that and I'm going to go punch him in the face it is what it for talking like that to my granddaughter I said no Luchi what did they say and she starts to cry she said Grandpa they said you Pokemon Grasshopper And I had this Epiphany that my grandchild thought that my brain injury had made me stupid uhoh yeah and I didn't want my grandkids thinking Grandpa was stupid right so I went home and I you know I asked my wife I said hey babe you're you're a millennial can you help me with Pokemon go and she says no that's a stupid game but there's YouTube videos so I log on to the YouTube videos yeah they might as well been in Japanese because I didn't know what the hell they were talking about right I didn't know about types and move sets I didn't know any of that [ __ ] yeah but I had an advantage over a four-year-old I could play time I wanted I could go out at night by myself and I have money yeah and I was taking my wife on a World trip because she'd never been anywhere but Iowa and San Antonio so we took off and went San Francisco New York City Massachusetts Paris Rome oh wow made our way around by the time we got back to Austin unbeknownst to me because I didn't know about the Pokedex I didn't know how to get in there and find it I had caught every Pokemon that was available at that point in the game all 140 now legendaries weren't out yet but I had all 141 but I didn't know it so we land at the Austin Airport and my son and my granddaughter pick us up and my granddaughter says Grandpa let me see your phone so she takes my phone I don't know why she wants it but she's in getting into my poked deck and she says Grandpa you Pokedex aaz you're that Japanese cartoon voice she's talking to me in the cartoon voice and I didn't realize that I had them all and I said and i' going up in levels too cuz you know when you caught a new Pokemon yeah it leveled you up and so I was I think I was up to level 34 by then she was still ahead of me and uh I said well Lucy am I still a grasshopper and she says no grandpa you are a Pokemon master trainer now look I met two presidents for [ __ ] that I did in the Army really George Bush no can you say okay never mind okay who knows we want say that pales to insignificance to your grandchildren thinking you're cool uhhuh nothing tops that and my grandkids play and so I just started playing every day and I realized I had a full Pokedex and yeah and his brothers I mean he'll tell you I don't understand video games I mean you guys could you know his brothers had told me about Pokemon go that when you got to level 40 yeah you got $10,000 which I didn't care about money is not an issue but they also told me I got an Infinity master ball oh wow okay and I needed that because I couldn't even throw a curve yeah so I needed a ball that would catch them and every time every time so I needed that Infinity ball and they also told me I would get a pair of glasses that I could put on my character and it would take them to any region in the world to hunt region specific Pokemon so you could go in like to Japan or something like to New Zealand and get Relic right so I wanted that okay cuz you know I wanted that well you know so I worked real hard to get to level 40 and I got there pretty quick and I didn't get anything his brother said my brother said not man so so you don't understand a whole lot about games do you understand like what gacha games are Pokemon go is a gotcha game so do you know how much money teone is spent on those games techone your son Oh Oh I thought you you I thought you were asking me about Niantic I I didn't hear Tech tone I heard um I know he spent a lot a lot how much how much do you think a lot is I I'll bet he spent 100 Grand man if only that were true more than 100 Grand well good we're GNA go car shopping this week that's right Dad needs a car that it how much you think I spent I thought 100 Grand 150,000 I swear to God I'll tell you about this I spent uh probably half a million probably about probably 600 700,000 well I can see that I mean no I I mean I look at these guys that that stream it yeah I mean they've got an egg on all the time that you know they're I mean okay when when when remote raiding yeah when you were still allowed to do unlimited remote raids in Pokemon go which you can't do anymore but when Co hit they they they just let you do it they let you do it right which before Co remote rating was called spoofing right and it was against the rules but then when Co hit they didn't want to get law suits for us meeting to do raid so they opened up remote raiding I was spending 150 bucks a day on remote raid passes uh I was playing 24 hours a day with people in Japan and Australia New Zealand France so for you to hear that it's like not really that big of a deal yeah you don't care bro hey [ __ ] it bro okay here's look I mean all joking aside yeah as serious as I can be okay life what's important in life is the experiences you have and the friends that you make uhuh how big your house is doesn't matter what kind of car you drive doesn't matter oh I know that you know I mean how much money you got in the bank I mean as long as you can take care of yourself and the people that you're responsible for it it none of that matters what matters is hanging out with people you care about and doing stuff that makes them happy and you happy yeah because there's going to come a time when no matter what's going on the only thing that's going to make you happy is a good bow movement you know because you're sitting in the nursing home and you know they're giving you iron pills and you're getting constipated so you know live your life and do the things but don't hurt other people I mean if you're hurting other people you'll never you can't ever make up for that for you know I mean I you know people ask me what was the about the military what did you like well I love the camaraderie yeah I I love the fact that young people like y'all joined the army in the military branches after 9911 knowing that they were going to have to go to Afghanistan and Iraq yeah I mean that's that's that's a sacrifice that you just because we hadn't had anything like that since World War II you know Vietnam was fought with a drafted I got drafted you know Vietnam was fought with drafted soldiers people weren't signing up yeah and it was fought mostly with drafted soldiers of color you know I mean but when 9/11 happened Young Americans like you guys said hey we we want to go we want to take care of America and that made me feel really good what made me feel bad about the military was that people that died yeah you know and everybody says well they were bad people well I don't know that they were bad people just because they were on the other side of the equation I don't know that they were bad you know I mean every you've seen that poster about the original Freedom Fighters and it's the Native Americans or oh yeah yeah Indians own horses the original Freedom Fighters I thought it was the original border patrol yeah but you know I mean to to their people they were the Freedom Fighters and we were the bad guys of course you know to the British I mean if they had won a revolutionary war guess what it would [ __ ] say exact no I get it so I don't know that you know I don't know that the North Vietnamese were bad H I don't know I mean not maybe maybe that ideologically their government was bad but on an individual basis I don't think that they were evil I think that's the case with most people like even people that are in countries that you probably disagree with a lot on like these are just normal people want to live their life and not have to deal with anything exactly you know I mean it's not like people wake up and say what does Vladimir Putin want me to do today right you know I mean I'm pretty sure they wish he wasn't their president he just won again yeah didn't another six years yeah he did you know and then they have a terrorist attack and body knows it was Isis and he blames it on the Ukraine uhhuh you know and he controls the news stations over there so that's all the Russian people are hearing yeah they're not hearing that our CIA warned him there was a terrorist attack coming from Isis and they ignored it yeah and then they turn around blame it on the Ukraine so I'm curious with with how you know [ __ ] up you think the country is today what what do you what is some advice you think the youth needs to hear they need to vote they need to vote and I don't care who they vote for okay let's make one thing perfect perfectly clear America was built on the fact that everybody gets to vote and they get to vote for who they want to vote for and nobody should denigrate who they vote for well and and that's what and and that's what we've got today it's got to the point that if you vote like this you're an idiot if you vote like that you're a Nazi that's right stop who you vote I don't it's none of my business who she votes for or who it is none of my business yeah you get your vote I get my vote and hopefully they count them all and they count them correctly hopefully but we're so polarized that people will do bad things because they're so afraid of the other side winning that's right instead of just saying hey well if we don't like what they do we'll have another election in two years and change it you know so people out of their mind that's what it is and and I think that really it's the uh people that like what you said about how they will do a bad thing and they do it for a good reason that's the scariest thing because still a bad thing yeah but like in their mind like this is the same mindset people had burning witches yep you know it's like this is the history of humanity this always happens I I don't know if it's ever they burn them right they drowned them right well they drowned them well if they in America they didn't burn any of that was an Old English thing they drowned them right I well yeah cuz like if they drowned them they said if they if they weren't a witch they'd come back to the surface right no uh if they were a witch they'd come back to the surface that's what it was because like that way there's no way they could ever make a mistake earlier in this podcast you said yourself that uh and if you you don't have if you don't want to uh that your wife is a millennial right yeah so I am wondering my current wife your current wife is a millennial yeah so for the people wondering at home how is it being 72 being married to someone who's about to turn 30 how's how's that she's older than you she's older than me yeah by how much like one year or two no no a few months okay yeah so what is that relationship like between a 72y old and a 30-y old what's the difficulties what what are the no more difficult than you and me okay so it's not a big deal things are only difficult if you want them to be right I mean okay let's say that Emmy's making dinner tonight and she works hard on dinner okay okay my belief is I'm going to be thankful that she's making me dinner okay and I don't give a [ __ ] whether it's good or bad she made me dinner and I'm GNA love it I will say that she cannot cook okay but I don't care she no not you oh I was like what the heck his his wife made me salmon lemon pasta salmon lemon past the most disgusting [ __ ] I've ever eaten I like it that's all that matters S I like salmon and is it just the the ingredients or like just just think about that this is like like sour pasta you don't like lemon pasta I love lemon pasta yeah okay well [ __ ] not me bro but no I mean if if you looking for things to denigrate you can find them you know you so you know if you wake up on a rainy day and [ __ ] because it's a rainy day instead of saying well we needed the rain you're GNA go through life not happy okay but if if you wake up every day just hey man I'm glad I woke up you know that was other grippies advice you gave me yeah was every day is a good day if you wake up yeah if you wake up it's you everybody asked me how's today going I so I didn't wake up in a hole with dirt coming down at me yeah so it's a good day yeah well just because you've been in your words married five times right it's not any different your in his words it it's like it's not any different than dating someone who's like like two years apart or 10 years apart age is just a number okay I mean I play Pokemon go every day I mean how many 72 year olds play Pokemon I mean I used to play golf a lot but I got tired of playing golf because everybody I played golf with all they did was [ __ ] about everybody else they should be happy they're playing golf instead they're bitching about you know college kids and you know I mean so when I started playing Pokemon go it changed my mindset on everything because most of the people I mean don't get me wrong they're they're [ __ ] that play Pokémon go I mean they think that the you know that the fact that they won at PVP last night you know there's a lot of ego Gamers a lot of ego Gamers but for the most part it's just nice people out there playing and it rewired my brain to where I could have conversations with people that I don't know yeah and it was good for me and and learning how to play the game helped my brain injury recovers significantly yeah you changed drastically after Pokemon go yeah I am curious so as content creators I thought you were John yeah as John right are you curious John yes so as Curious George I am curious John uh you got to understand why people watch someone like if you watch if you watch Iron Mike Tyson who's gonna be fighting Jake Paul soon okay let me tell you why I watch Mike Tyson okay okay yeah first off Mike Tyson absolutely acknowledges that he is not the greatest he is not the goat the second Muhammad Ali is the goat you think so that's Mike Tyson says that okay I don't know I didn't fight either one of them right you know so unless you were in the ring I don't think you get to have an opinion all these Sports writers [ __ ] you know basketball players tell you that Michael Jordan's the goat yeah you know and they've played against him and LeBron they're they're different players they're they're completely different Talent sets and and different personalities but you know I mean if Mike Tyson says that Muhammad Ali is the goat who's going to dispute that you know and then they both went to jail unjustifiably I think uh but yeah I yeah I I I watched Tyson because he was asked once um you all probably heard this story you know Mike lives out in Vegas uhhuh and his ex-wife Robin given she also lives in Vegas okay and Mike tells this story about when they were in the middle of getting their divorce he would still swing by and hit that right you know because he's Mike Tyson yeah and she's Robin given and he would swing by to hit it so he had left his lawyers and he swung by her house to hit it and she wasn't there right and he was going down the driveway to get in his car to drive away and she rolled up in her gold Mercedes you know 450cl and mhm Mike says you're not going to believe who's in that car Brad Pit was in the car with her and uh so somebody in the audience Mike did you knock him out and Mike Tyson says you can't knock out Brad Pit God would hate you God made Brad Pit yeah that's the prettiest man in the world I wish I'd been in prison with him oh my God that's inside and and so I mean that's what he's this is because he's got his oneman show and he talks about this and he was telling that I was about piss in my pants while he's telling it and then somebody in the crowd want to know if he went back and saw Robin given after that and Mike Tyson said to the whole world she been with Brad Pit I ain't got nothing for her damn so I mean you got to respect that that's that is a self-awareness that most people don't have and certainly not most people that are considered one of the two or three best pugilists that ever lived right they would never want to admit that another guy was yeah was above them in some situations when it comes to to hitting so he admitted I thought it was great then I thought he was awesome and hangover yeah so he was I just thought he was awesome there's two questions I got to ask you before we wrap this whole thing up okay do I get to tell The Hangover I haven't I well we well if you tell more stories maybe we'll tell a very embarrassing story that I didn't want you to tell on this but on the patreon so if you want to go subscribe to the patreon you're more than welcome to patreon.com staken eggs appreciate y'all subscribing um I wanted to know this is your first interaction with asmin and Emmy and uh you know no I've met him before sure well on camera oh yeah right so I wondering why do you think people watch me why do you think people watch as and why do you think people would watch Emmy just from your gut gut reaction from what you've just met them for well go go one by one as is very self-aware okay yeah he is he is as AZ is very self-aware as mongler as mongler is very self-aware right and you don't get that and he's not conceited he's open he's obviously up on the issues I respect that I appreciate it thank you very much Emy I mean come on man who wouldn't want to watch damn look at that look at that thank you you know I mean my goodness um no I I'm thrilled all [ __ ] aside uhhuh here's how I ended up back in Austin how's that okay I was out in Utah I was traveling the country in my RV with my dogs and my pig Lola Lola and I was doing that because I'd been in the military 41 years I'd never seen the Grand Canyon okay I'd never seen Zion National I'd never seen the Petrified Force you know and so I was traveling around seeing stuff and um he called me and said hey I need you to go back to Austin to this house I'm buying and make sure it's okay make sure my utilities are on and make sure you know the locks work and so I drove my RV from Salt Lake City to here in a day and a half damn and that was hard drive so I get here because I want to make sure everything's okay for when he comes down and uh then he gets here and I'm seeing the setup and I'm seeing what's going on and it's it's realizing that it's lucrative that's crazy right yeah real crazy and so then I'm thinking wow I hope that he's hanging out with good people uhuh because you know you see all these Pro so you think you're worried like oh my God is he doing cocaine no no I wasn't worried about that no no no you see all these pro athletes that sign these million-- dooll contracts and 5 years later they're broke of course because their posi spends all their money sure or their business like Kareem Abdul Jabar his you know the basketball his his business manager [ __ ] him out of a half a billion dollars that's outrageous you know I mean it yeah and so one of the things I worried about was who was he getting into the internet with right and would they take advantage of him yeah and that was one of the reasons that I stayed here uhhuh cuz I wanted to make sure that he didn't get taken advantage of because he's he's just he trusts everybody and and you know I mean probably a little bit too much yeah but it became with with a couple notable exceptions that I picked up on immediately yeah um no I'm thrilled that he's hanging out with you guys that's scre no it makes I can go to sleep at night and not worry about it yeah you know but and that that was one of the reasons I stayed here was to make sure that he was because you know everybody worries about the lawyers uhhuh lawyers doesn't scare people what scares people is physical violence yeah showing up at their doorstep at 2 o'clock in the morning so yeah I just wanted to make sure that my son was you know and he is now but for like for a while there I was worried you know but you know I am actually curious how is it as my dad when you see people saying [ __ ] about me on the internet that you know is not true how does that make you feel hey Bob it's just content Co that's right [ __ ] himu [ __ ] him who gives a [ __ ] you know I mean really you know I mean one of his brothers got upset over some stuff that John said and I said hey I can guess who that is on man it's it's [ __ ] off you know I mean it's a it's a yeah exact I mean you know that's like getting upset when Roman Reigns beats Dean Ambrose you know it's just that's how the script went that night you can't get upset you just watch it for the show you know so no I don't that stuff doesn't bother me good I'm glad I care less the final question I have for you because it's somebody that people ask me a lot how tall are you how tall am I how tall should I have been how tall are you no no that's a serious question okay how tall should you have been okay when I when I went in the Army in 1972 I was 5 foot n and a half but over the years you know back injuries neck injuries two fake hips you just start to shrink I don't have any disc spaces in my back anymore so I'm probably around 5'7 now okay 5'7 yeah now how tall should I have been yeah cuz I said I was almost 70 in I should have been 61 or 6'2 now you say how do you know that how do you know that okay well I was born in 1951 at 25 weeks I weighed two pounds and my God 12 ounces oh and there was no neonatal care they just put you under a light yeah and you know premature babies like that only reach about the 90th percentile of what they show have reached in height and statur if you extrapolate yeah my my dad is was 6'2 uhhuh you know so that's probably where I I should have been somewhere crazy you say that because like my family is the exact same thing I think my dad is was unironically 59 and a half and he had like five neck operations y now he's 5'5 5'6 Y and everybody else in my family is like over six foot yep I've never asked you that I never knew that what about what I didn't know that you were premature yeah I was real premature I had no idea you that's okay okay like like I got to asked about Ro v Wade yeah we got to keep it a little bit tight because we got to end soon yeah I got to ask about roie Wade and basically my opinion on roie Wade is I don't have a uterus I don't have ovaries it's none of my [ __ ] business uhuh you know I don't think that women need to make that decision and they need to make it as a group and it should probably be made state by state I don't think the federal government has any business telling women what they can or can't do I think birth control should be free for everybody and you know but when you start talking about abortions I was a 25 we baby and I'm here yeah so you know yeah I I mean you'd think you'd know by 13 or 14 weeks whether you wanted to have a kid or not but I know that there are different circumstances all the time I mean I had women that came in to my clinics that were five months pregnant and didn't know it you know it just it just happens so but I yeah I yeah so you're 5'7 yeah now yeah I'm 66 you used to be used to be 6 hand size used to be 68 look at this almost the same size hand is so look at this your hand is so much higher up now it's fair I got a dig look at that I there's not much difference there sure so how' this happen how am I how am I so much bigger than you well I fed you as a oh God he had we had a a nanny fed him white bread butter and sugar sandwiches to God when he was little is that how Ralph happened that's where Ralph came from my God he he'd go through a loaf of bread and a pound of butter and a pound of sugar daily uhhuh yeah God damn it was good and he was the best athlete in the family when it came to things like hand eye coordination uhhuh you know bowling golf I was nasty at bowling still am hitting baseball go bowling I hit a 180 the other day fall down now oh yeah that's true fall down okay last thing and then we'll wrap this up what was my original name supposed to be what but what was I supposed to be named before I was called John you don't remember this I was always calling you John no but what did the other person want to call me oh I don't [ __ ] know I never listened you remember miles biscuit oh that's [ __ ] that's not a real story no that is that's just you okay his brothers okay oh that that was his brother's [ __ ] tell what others his brothers did with him I'm at the Pentagon okay they're still living with their mother about 100 miles west of DC yeah and I get a phone call from the county sheriff asking me asking me do I have a son named Billy Billy uhhuh oh [ __ ] his brothers had told him that there had been another brother named Billy but their mom got mad and killed him and he was buried underneath the front porch damn so he's at school he's in like kindergarten or first grade and he's crying inside of an igloo made of milk jugs crying and the teacher says what's wrong and he says my mother killed my brother Billy oh my [ __ ] and of course the police think I'm involved too of course you know so yeah that's the one about miles biscuit that was [ __ ] well she did want to name you miles but biscuit wasn't the middle name biscuit okay am I gble do I fall for sh she wanted to name you miles but your nickname was biscuit yeah your nickname was biscuit yeah but I was named after your best friend that's right don't yeah yeah we don't got talk about the guy I was in the army with us who he's named yeah cool well uh you know we're going to tell a pretty great story oh we got some great stories they need to they need to stay on for these next because they're for the patreon we got a great story that I didn't want to go on the main episode a couple cuz it's just a little bit little bit not yeah oh thank God I'm excited gentlemen we got three YouTube comments to read and also while I'm reading those I got you a presentence right there so if you want to open that that that's for you I'm gonna read those don't worry about that I like the I agree with the first one yeah I I'll read it while while I'm reading those just you that's yours to your left yeah it's your present for coming and number two they change the rules every year so nobody ever knows what the so first com from George indestructible is someone needs to tell Asma that long hair looks really good on him I got to I got to fix this this this hairwine though I got to do something about that yeah uhhuh uh WiFi Luna 7632 says techone trying to understand taxes is so [ __ ] funny he canot lock in I just don't know why they don't tell you how much you up no you're right crazy there's places that do that changes I don't know why they don't do it here but they don't yeah straight it's very complicated I do know why I could explain it but it would take 30 minutes yeah sure but it's just I feel like it's when people are acting like they get taxes okay am I going to jail no no no no no no that's for you that's for your car if you ever need it you sure I'm not going to jail no I give all my homies a sword [ __ ] I gotta give you a sword it's my favorite color it's blue blade that's real by the way be very careful it's very real it's very sharp so is it going to be signed on the handle if you want me to sign it yeah of course no no no by the the sword maker did the sword maker sign it no no no no no and the last comment is Richard 3353 says the amount of times TCH said that's badass and this episode 8 plus there's no [ __ ] way a lot I don't even say badass anymore uh regardless uh you got used to it subconscious now well he gave me one too probably illegal though right no no I gave I gave him that one you can carry swords in Texas I thought there was like I got a buddy I mean okay there's a person I play Pokemon we'll talk about this on the patreon anyways guys uh as Emy was very cool yall be my dad uh boys hope you enjoyed today's episode if you want to see a very embarassing story I told my dad make sure to subscribe to staken eggs.com P patreon.com staken eggs and uh yeah see you on the next one see you peace hi [Music] then there that I can see the sparkle in your eyes it makes me realize oh we need is you and me a light shine from your eyes it brightens and a cloudy day and I find your light Shin brighter when you turn and Shine Your Light my [Music] way uh today we're doing something really fun we're doing an anime tier list because admin's been getting into death note lately and he's been loving it which gets me excited so now we have a tier list of uh some of the best anime ever created the top 300 we probably won't get them all I don't care what what are y's top three anime top three yeah it's off the rip it's tough because I've like I've been watching anime over a period of like I want say like 15 years so it's hard to compare something I watched a year ago to something I've I watched like recently cuz like you know like when you're younger it's different but I probably say for me like mob psycho code guos F Brotherhood I know you have feelings about people but I love that one when I when I watched it yeah so it's kind of based off like the feeling oh maybe Death Note would be up there too yeah yeah you're kind of like mob I love mob yeah what about you asmond berserk good one ghost in the show good one JoJo's Bizarre Adventure which season one and two dude actually saying that you like one is a very bold take not only is it a bold take but it's actually the only correct take I think it's also very good I feel like people who don't like it just don't get it and it's also it is the most important season for the actions that come after that I think it's my favorite yeah I'm part my favorite by far I love part five have you seen that uh Joo giovana not yet holy [ __ ] can I tell you what it's about I I'm I will get there I will get there

Channel: Steak and Eggs Podcast

Views: 189,291

Keywords: asmongold, emiru, tectone, steak & eggs podcast, steak and eggs, steak and eggs podcast

Id: kOBboLx6mTQ

Length: 101min 8sec (6068 seconds)

Published: Fri Mar 29 2024