Still Single? Here's The REAL Reason Why w/ RC Blakes (Men Its Our Fault?)

I've been told that I am controlling when I'm like Hey listen you know and I'll just say it this is my show say hey man tell them other I'm coming for you you know I'm gonna be real I was like come on I'm coming for you and I said that sounds controlling and I'm like no I'm not control I'm letting you know my intention yeah that's called Alpha what's happening to the table let's go yo Today's show is going to be a little different man so I actually want to start off a little different today because I want to save the majority of today's show to really Dive In and to learn uh today's We're Not Gonna really talk about money we're going to really talk about really our Consciousness on both um the women's side Our Queen side and the brother's side we're going to really dive in we're going to talk about some relationships and really understanding men and women better because now while I said we will not talk about per se money but who we connect ourselves with does impact our money in the future and I believe having healthy relationships impacts our tomorrow and you all know man I I have no shame in my game saying that I am ready for marriage I am seeking marriage and I'm dated with the intentions of marriage I mean I've been going through some things and I called in a friend um someone who I look at as a spiritual father in this space of relationships there's a lot of relationship experts out there who are single um who are really not teaching from the word and they're just teaching from their personal you know understandings of past mistakes and past experiences and I'm not knocking none of them but when I look at uh marriages and when I look at relationship people you better be married I need you married I need you happily married I need you having good sex with your wife with your husband I need you happy so when you're giving me advice I know you've experienced it all the ups the Downs the the times you thought about giving up and the good days so that way when you're talking to me give me life so today y'all we have the one and only RC Blakes is in the building and I I met him for the first time a few months ago and my good friends conference Dr Irish shahiri out of Houston Texas and um I've been heard of them like I was a huge fan of his ministry but this brother can he he is a teacher I'm not gonna say he's a preacher because I think preacher puts you in one category now this man can teach and he makes the word of God so practical to us everyday people so even if you ain't a Christian you're going to really love what he has to say today so I'm telling you right now get your notepad get your pen because Brothers he's coming for us today too ladies I already know how he rolled but but before we get to uh the man of the hour two quick things um I want to just thank today's sponsors because we could not have RC blacks in the building uh without thanking my good friends over at Churchill you know Churchill um is partnering with me when it comes to helping get black people minority people and even all people into a mortgage into their dream homes you do understand that if we're going to really close that wealth Gap then what we got to do is we got to get people into home ownership and Bethel not Bethel Churchill understands the importance of home ownership so they've partnered with me here at the table to help get you into that so this is what they're going to do for you number one interest rates did go up but they're still locking you in at the lowest rate possible for 90 days they're going to give you a certified guaranteed pre-approval that you can take out into the marketplace and with the certified pre-approval they're gonna give you an extra five thousand dollars watch this to put on top of your earnest money so that way when you go to the seller it lets them know you're a guaranteed buyer and if whatever every reason you gotta back out because of the funding issue watch this church says gonna let your sellers keep that five thousand dollars so in these days and times you need that for sure backing and Churchill's going to walk with you throughout the whole process they finance all of my homes and you know what they're going to finance some more of my rental properties coming up here soon so I want you to check out my friends over at Anthony o'neill.com forward slash Churchill and also I want to thank our last sponsor for today's show is my friends over there at Bethel tech there are two industries that are creating multi-millionaires number one is tech tech is the new I believe uh black industry that is really going to help black people really Excel and make a lot of money and so if you can dedicate nine months but about investment about 14 to 17 000 it will impact the next nine to 19 to 29 years of your life because you'll go from making fifty thousand to a hundred thousand to three hundred thousand to five hundred thousand dollars a year just by simply getting a certificate in Tech and belt text will walk you throughout that entire process for nine months and after that nine month process man you can get a job making a hundred thousand dollars a year so listen go to Anthony o'neill.com forward slash Bethel because I promise you we are going to help you change your life financially so check out my friends today Churchill and Bethel Tech because they're going to bless you but now let's get to the man of the hour today um RC how are you doing sir man I am absolutely fantastic man I can't believe I'm sitting at the table no sir I can't believe that you're at David I really I'm it's it's such an honor no matter I thank you for coming you do such an amazing job man I'm just trying to get to your label now that's it you know you've been you've been teaching the gospel for how long now 40 years man 40 years I was um 18 years old 18 58 now you don't you don't have the swag of a 58 year you got to swag like a 35 40. that's because I hang around people like you well we know you do have a heart for people and the young people for sure absolutely so you're you're definitely known in in the gospel space correct uh but then now you're even more well known in the YouTube and just really uh young people Millennial relationship space when did you develop a heart for you're known as the queenology guy teaching queenology when did you develop a heart for that so man I'm on I'm on Facebook and this is a Saturday night I'm preparing for Sunday morning I'm getting ready to meet the church the next morning and I'm listening to this I'm reading this post of this young woman she's clearly educated you can tell by the language and the punctuation and our message is great she's like to all the ladies out there you know I want to encourage you to use your education use your brains use your connections use your vision to get ahead in life and if all else fails I don't know if I can say it like actually like she actually wrote it but she said fall back on your the booty your booty oh yeah I said booty yeah okay I'm glad you said it she said phone back on your booty and so man I'm sitting there as as a father of of three young women okay and as a spiritual father of you know congregations of women yeah and I'm like what's going what's going on here where is this coming from you know how have our women come to a point where they're using sexuality as a success strategy in the day and time when they're more educated than ever and holy spirit said to me she's not had the father-daughter talk and so that was my that was my first book that I wrote to the empowerment of women the father-daughter talk and um and did not expect that it was going to become a whole movement and then it evolved into queenology developing the consciousness of a queen what does God say about you who are you in the eyes of God not not what does the world say not what his culture is saying but what does God say so when we talk about the queenology and the consciousness of queenology um except we know we talk you talk about this on your show on your YouTube channel and we're going to drop his information in today's show notes just in case if you have not um heard of RC Blake um a wealth of information over there so we'll drop that information below but what what does queenology mean to the to the typical woman watching right now it it it's bringing the woman to a place where she can't accept God's definition of her okay because when you look at the world today you have a myriad of voices that are attempting to redefine the woman and so the woman is listening to uh you know male um influencers the woman is listening to the culture the woman is listening to the broken Sisterhood The Other Women around her as it relates to who she is and what she should be or strive for but we have to bring the woman back to God's original plan the Genesis plan of her being a co-equal in dominion and so queenology is bringing that woman back to consciousness of God's original plan and then renewing her mind to a place or to a point where she accepts her Destiny yeah and she's able to watch this stand happily and healthily if that's a word right in her individuality where she's not like the typical woman who only views herself as a success within the context of a relationship to a man so would you say then a lot of our ladies and correct me if I'm wrong I'm just following you here would you say that a lot of our ladies are then operating with a broken kindness absolutely break that down for absolutely man how how is that then well I'm following you and I'm like okay so that means I I don't want to get no trouble but I'm like well that means that a lot of ladies have a lot of they have broken Consciousness broken Consciousness um when you when you open up the the social media in particularly Instagram for me right it's like every other posting you see a woman is naked you know they either naked or they have something so sheer they may as well have nothing on yeah what is that that's broken consciousness you know when you see women who who exercise what I call mascara therapy we're scared out there yeah where where they they paint up the outside to cover up the pain on the inside you know all of these labels and and Brands they really can't afford yeah yeah you know four thousand dollar person and it's empty right right right overstuffed closet you know and I often say that overstuffed closet is quite often the evidence of an empty heart you know broken consciousness have everything in the world they have the education they have the money they have the that are reaching the goals but they're personally miserable they have not locked in on nor have they truly accepted the Creator's estimation of them broken consciousness you said something that they have all this stuff on the outside so they have the they have the beauty they have the brains you know they have a success yeah but internally they're miserable they're hurt correct and I'm scared to ask ask this question because I think you're going to answer it the way that that I think you're going to answer it and then that means that I play a role and the lack of the consciousness of a woman I play a role in her broken Consciousness where I play a role as a man internally and you just said correct correct correct I know where you're going incorrect how is it though like how how do we as men play a role into that well are we to blame for their internal I personally believe we are you know when you look at scripture wow and scripture says the head of the man is God right and the head of the woman is the man well we typically use that as or we view that text as um some hierarchy but the reality is God supplied the man everything he needed to be yeah and then God reached into the man and from the man extracted a woman the man supplied Eve with everything she needed to be so if the woman is broken if the woman is deficient it the the the situation does not mend itself beginning with the woman we have to go back to where she came from and that's out of us the the purest reflection of the of the man is the quality of his woman [Music] so if if my woman is broken if my my wife Lisa is broken that is on my watch if the black woman is broken in the black community we as men can't gather together in little bands and groups and and uh Riot or march on Womanhood yeah we have to own that you know when God gave me uh this message queenology well you have to go back into my history people say well why why is he so passionate about empowering women well when I was a younger guy man I was I was a womanizer absolutely I mean I mean just complete me too horrible grew up in the church son of the pastor I was a teenage father out of wedlock clearly called the ministry still carrying on my womanizing ways and then one day man God got a hold of me and God actually grew me up and I evolved as a man and the first thing that I wanted to do when I actually evolved as a man if it were at all possible was to go back into my history and apologize to all of the women I had broken yeah unfortunately that was not possible most of them would not hear me anyway and so I committed myself to doing what was ever necessary to mend the clear Brokenness of women's Hearts today that is as the consequence of you know what we're taught as men because when I came along I don't know about your generation but when I came along um Unk would take you in the back as a young man and he would say boy this is how you get the girl this is how you game this is how you right you get the girl you know yeah and then he'll go inside and he'll take the little sisters or the little cousins the little female cousins and say girl keep your dress down and keep your panties up well you know we were kind of conditioned for this dysfunction yeah yeah where where the man becomes the Predator the woman becomes the prey yeah and and the man breaks the woman you know and and so I think every man that is really looking at society and looking at life honestly and sincerely has to say that we have played a major role we know how to psychologically manage women um come on man you know we know how to do it but we get on these public platforms and we want to act like we don't know what happened where what happened to women we happen to them and if the woman is ever going to be mended and repaired it's going to start with our acknowledging what we've done and fulfilling our role as men and that is to heal the hearts of these women so right now you're talking to a bunch of ladies yes sir are you talking to us though to the brothers to the brothers yeah man I you know I'm known for queenology right but I've also written the book kingology okay you know um I I have I have uh stuff on my channel for brothers we don't listen and I think that I asked the Holy Spirit I said why is it that I can talk and women will hear me and and same guy can talk and right and mend on it and I have proof of you know concept absolutely I'm married 28 28 years I'm happily married you're faithful you know I'm all over the world yeah I ain't no ain't got no scandals no no babies over in Russia and all this kind of stuff here you know you know what I'm saying I have proof of content concept right right but Brothers don't hear me why do you think that is I think it's the it's the it's the Dominion spirit in a man you know all of us as men we feel like we are the leaders okay you know what I mean and and I think well we all are but I think the thing we're missing is that every man needs a man you know God created Adam from the dust of the earth and then Adam created his sons in his own image every man needs the imprint of a man that's come before him and done it successfully and so I think I think the respect for um the wisdom of the generation before is not there and so we're rising up and we're feeling like well I'm a man I know what I'm doing even as a young man my father the late Robert C Blake senior man dude was amazing with money amazing with Ministry amazing he was just a genius but because I was so close I really didn't hear I didn't learn most of the lessons I needed to learn because I thought I knew what I was doing yeah until I had a chance to do what I thought I knew I was doing and it failed and then I had to go back to the lessons that dude taught me well I think that's a lot of why we don't listen to one another all of us as men feel like we know and it's the natural inclination of a woman to be guided by the voice of a Trusted Man is that the natural instinctive woman or anything I think it's the natural inclination of a woman to be guided by the voice of a man she trusts a man she trusts is key most women don't trust most men because trust is not something a woman can give you it's something that you have to earn right right right you know what I'm saying right so I can speak to a generation of women because I've been here a long time yeah I've been consistent they've seen me live with my wife they hear my wife's testimony right they know what you see on the outside is what's really happening on the inside so I'm trusted yeah and so I can say you and I were talking I can say some things that may I can't say you know what I'm saying right come across as as harsh for some people but they can receive it from me because they know I love them they know my intent and so when a woman can trust a man she can receive truth from that man I think the hard part for men and I'ma come from a younger man to an older wiser more successful man when it comes to relationships right is is that I was that guy I'm I'm a preacher's kid you know I was womanizer I thought I was a father at 20 years old 21 years old played the father role for a year to only find out that it wasn't mine was in Ministry and still was a womanizer I've heard several ladies in the past and as I have evolved I was just like you I wish I could go back and apologize I even attempted to go back to two of them one heard me cried and was like thank you I needed that release the other one she cussed me out oh yeah and I totally respect that yes sir yes um and the others I just said after the second one cussed me out I said I'm not even gonna try to others yeah I'm just gonna just try and do do better moving forward one of my things that I had a problem with Bishop uh and I really want to just I really get your thoughts on it tell me if I'm wrong because I mean I brought you here for us and US includes me yes yes sir so as a man who who wants to listen who who wants to learn who is ready to be married to have 28 years 30 years 40 years of marriage um in the past when I was in a womanizing space I just approached the woman as we're just cool we're just friends we're approaching uh but I would say a about a few months ago to maybe a year ago I was really interested in a woman and I said Hey listen up front I told her I'm leading with intentionality I'm ready to get married and I'm dating for marriage she told me pause wow uh you're kind of I feel a little pressured a little bit wow let's just be friends up front I want to marry my best friends let's just be friends wow and let's just see where it naturally goes and so as a man Bishop I was confused because in the beginning when I lived with let's just be friends it'd be cool you know what I'm saying then the thought was what's your intentions what do you want to do you're not moving with intentions and then over here as I'm being very intentional letting you know hey I'm dating you I'm pursuing you I am pursuing you with the intent of marriage it was hey I feel a little pressured where the disagreement came in was is what I need your help at was um she said that that made me feel pressured and I said hey as a man if I'm gonna take you serious mentally I cannot just say we're friends and we're seeing where it can go because if I look at you that way mentally then if another woman comes and I know you've seen my show she got the booty and she got the Bible you know what I'm saying I'm going to be like hey since we're just friends correct and I'm like I can't call you just friends but I shouldn't make you feel pressured neither no what what should I have done differently because I'm trying to make sure that I am not hurting ladies anymore yeah but both scenarios seem like I still hurt the woman so what what should men do differently who are trying to progress forward and move forward the right way but then when we get approached with that how should we how should we deal with that well I don't think you should internalize that oh you know I don't think you should internalize her saying to you and uh responding to your decisiveness as a man as though it's a negative that that that does that has no negative uh connotation relative to you at all what it does for me just listening to it is it speaks again to the broken consciousness of this generation of women that when a man actually steps up wow you know with the Genesis Model come on where Adam meets Eve right for the first time and she's she's naked and the first thing he does is he makes love to her mind he says you're a woman when he calls a woman you're a man with a womb you're my equivalent you come out of me he was decisive but when a generation of women are broken they don't even know how to respond to a healthy man and so all you can do with that because I think you're absolutely correct a woman that says to you well let's be friends doesn't realize that she's putting you in the friend zone and to put you in the friend zone is to put you in the friend mindset but she says she wasn't saying that yeah but that's what she was saying you know what I'm saying that's that's that's exactly what she was saying you know because how can how can a woman see a a young man successful good looking Christian love God ready for commitment and say well let's slow this down come on man that speaks to the need for men like you and I having these conversations because our women have been have been broken and conditioned and don't even realize it they don't even know how to respond to healthy guys you know there's this thing called type yep that I I just struggle with women all of the time they don't want to get away from this thing called type and you know my my statement is you've been getting your type for the last decade and where has it gotten you where has it gotten you so there has to be a point where the mind is renewed and where we bring women back to a place of Consciousness and what can we do as men to help that process begin be the example acknowledge the trauma we we create on a daily basis we know what we're doing we get in front of these cameras on YouTube and we say the things we say to these women we know we're damaging these women more women have to hear men be honest and say well this was not right that was not right and I think as as women hear that and internalize it The Healing Begins the most important thing we can do as men is to really Step Up in terms of fathering our daughters you may not be able to help your generation but you can definitely plant seed into the Next Generation really intentionally pouring into the self-esteem of your daughters yeah because I was kind of raised up in that generation where they said well three girls one boy four kids well they said they said well you know daughters are a mama's job son's a daddy's job so you just Finance the girls and just let them and then it was later on in life that I realized that the sense of identity the sense of security the sense of self-esteem the father pours that into the girls so every man should Step Up in terms of how he fathers his his daughters his nieces the young girls in the church esteeming them and building them and you know if this message can and I'm listening to more Brothers I'm listening to more brothers that are coming out with a real balanced approach to manhood you know they said well you either have uh sense of pimps but there's another category called Kings and kings of men who know how to to manage kingdoms they're not they're not managed by women like simps they don't need to manipulate women like pimps they are wise managers of Kingdoms they know how to identify and work with queens and so these are you know we have to simply be our best version yeah as men I think this generation of women just they need to see more examples of authentic manhood not this propaganda that we have out here today for men like myself and then I want to go back to the really understanding the consciousness of our our Queens for me and my for men like myself young men who have we've I've publicly said I've done ladies wrong yes sir and I've publicly apologized for for hurting them in the past and I am in a different season of my life to where I'm like okay I'm ready to do the right thing yes sir and I'm ready for marriage I'm ready to be intentional but I'm always compared to the other men come on man who are not that I always got to deal with what well you're just like everyone else or I like how do I date as a single person when I gotta compete with what the other man did who was once me yes sir yes sir like do what do I give up do I do I deal with the sometimes our ladies respectfully can be disrespectful towards the good man because of past hurt blatantly yes respectful you said blatantly I said respectfully he said yeah RC said blatantly no because this I mean I'm telling I've been told you're insecure I've been told that I am controlling when I'm like Hey listen you know and I'll just say it this is my show hey man tell them other I'm coming for you you know I'm gonna be real I was like come on tell them I'm coming for you and I said that sounds controlling and I'm like no I'm not control I'm letting you know my intentions yeah that's called Alpha [Music] RC you know that this oh man you know my story come on RC I said to my wife I said hey we have been dating for years I said I don't think I'm getting married my wife went on and she left she didn't ask me why she didn't beg me to stay wife just left she left got another boyfriend he was a big league baseball player yeah yeah well a long story short I come to this point where I realized God says that's your wife well I called my wife now this dude's a multi-millionaire I'm broke at the time but I called my wife and I said hey you know tell a little baseball baseball boy going about his business you my wife come on that's how men step when men know what they want come but nobody's teaching the daughters this so they don't even know how to recognize or respond to the you know to to the did your wife receive that as controlling no did she receive that as narcissist no how did she because I don't remember that part of the story how did she receive that when you told her that she said okay because she knew I was her husband she said okay because she knew I was her husband you see what I think and I don't mean to cut you off no you mean how to finish your question no no do it but what I think we're struggling with today is this confusion of you know masculinity and femininity and and one of the things that I'm trying to teach men and women today is how to understand sometimes women are so in there masculine that they don't know how to receive a masculine man when a man steps to her in a masculine fashion like you just described oh you're controlling when the reality is that's a moment for her to step into her femininity and and receive that and let you drive women don't know how to most many women let's put it that way don't know how to let a real man drive this is how you're constantly stuck with clowns and crowns and the kings are slipping through your fingers is because Kings like yourself are only going to settle with queens and queens are are the equivalent of the king but she's the female feminine version Yes Man and see that that feminine masculine thing is like a delicate dance yeah and when a woman shows up masculine with a masculine man it's always a Clash but when a woman is feminine she knows how to move and respond and flow with the masculinity of that man and that's the woman that brings a king the kind of peace and rest that he's looking for that's why queenology is so important to the world do you got a course I do I do it's right there at my website we're going to put that course on there and that's all I'm gonna say because I I think Our Ladies need to hear that yes sir because I'll be I'm just being vulnerable in my own show and I'm not even trying to get emotional because I'm like man sometimes I think that I there's something wrong with me when I know you know there's only two men I listen to when it comes to a three three men I listen to when it comes to the relationship space um actually the alternate was very spiritual you Dr Tony Evans and my boy Tony Gaskins Junior absolutely those are the only three that like okay what they say I can take that to the Grave when it comes to relationship stuff who are in a relationship space and Tony Evans is really not in a relationship space but he's been married for a longer than I've been alive he's lived so it's like whenever he talks about that all right cool bat and then my boy Tony Gaskins Junior I'm like okay I'm listening and it's like man as I'm I'm getting what I'm saying yes in today's day and time it's from you all it's like okay cool lead with intentionality let her know up front absolutely be honest and transparent uh put action behind your words correct but then when we get pushed back with I was even told uh what does she say she said that you know every time I say something you get into defense mode and I told her I said I do I said because every time I say something you're saying I'm insecure I'm controlling on this and I'm like wait I'm confused because my mentors say lead like this but then today's ladies are saying completely opposite correct so I'm like one thing let's get back to this queenology for the brothers who are watching what's the first thing we need to do for ourselves for brothers for brothers um I think we have the detox okay you know what I mean because there's so many things that we've been trained um or made to believe equate to manhood yeah you know like sexuality you know like like right now today to be quite honest with you even in the Christian context if if a young man is 18 19 20 years old talking about his virgin first thing we're going to say is or he's gay yep he's gay maybe the brother saved yeah maybe he's living his life based on principles right you know what I mean right but where does he get where do we get this from this is the kind of stuff we actually teach so I think we have to detox then I think we have to connect ourselves to mentors and examples of people who are really doing it right and then you know so detox connect to mentors pray for God to give you as a man pray for God to give you your your Clear Vision yeah powerful point right here okay when I when I went back and retrieved my wife and said hey you know I made a mistake you're my wife tell this fella going about his business that was based on my wife is a beautiful woman amazing we've been together since we're in our 20s now I'm almost 60 years old I'm 58 she's 55 I know she's gonna kill me for saying that she's 50. she doesn't look like it though your wife is beautiful I take very good care of her yes you you do lady how you doing man absolutely she's a beautiful woman but watch this I married her because I knew she fit my future Anthony I knew where I was going and I knew she was the woman that could help me get there so a brother has to detox he got to get mentors but he gotta know where he's going you gotta know should not even try to make a relational decision until you know who you're going to be you don't even make a relational a permanent relational Choice based on who you are today you need to make a relational decision based on where you know you're going so this woman has to have more than the booty she has to have the aptitude and the heart and the spirit and the vision to be able to take this journey with you yeah and watch this when a woman does not when a man's life is as purposed as yours and a woman does not fit their future God will break it up absolutely absolutely you'll never let it work absolutely I think one of my one of my philosophies now is is um I know my vision I know where I'm going in life and she has to align with that Vision correct and if she doesn't align with the vision it's not Anthony saying no it's my god-given assignment and vision that saying oh man you know so it's like I'm not saying ah no it's like Hey listen you're just not a line correct you're still a queen correct you're just not my queen correct you know you're his queen I'm going here God is taking me there this is what I want to do this is where I want to go and if and if you're not aligned with that that's cool yeah I ain't got nothing to negative say about you I said all the time about my ex-fiance we weren't just aligned but she's an amazing woman if I see her today talk to her today man she's a great woman when she gets married I'm a celebrator come on man because she's a queen come on and so when I think about you know I wrote down some questions I wanted to make sure I get through these questions um so we talked about the man right yeah but I do want to talk about what are the effects of women who have broken consciousness um the inability to um appreciate themselves as individuals okay can't see themselves as individuals so what happens is um they struggle with being alone um you know they always gotta they're they're always they're always out in the club or you got to be out with their girlfriends they they shift from one meaningless relationship to another rarely do you find a season in her life where she's actually by herself and content that broken Consciousness won't allow her to actually be content and happy she'd rather be miserable with somebody present than to be by herself can appreciate we just kind of talked about it she cannot she can't appreciate um quality men that that really honor it's almost like when a woman is struggling with broken Consciousness it's almost like an honorable man is boring I've been come on man this is what I teach I I mean I deal with this every day it's like it's like an honorable man it's gonna be a gentleman and and and and you know he's boring and so she goes back to well he's not my type but the reality is she's struggling with that broken Consciousness and she she cannot celebrate um she cannot celebrate the even the accomplishments that she's made because she sees everything through the context of what's going on in the external World she's not fulfilled internally and she's trying to fill herself internally with external trappings relationships things and labels and all of the kind of stuff we talked about so for all of us watching right now when it comes to the ladies watching who comes from men watching I know they're probably saying okay Bishop I hear you queenology and a conscious woman I know they're probably saying well how do I know if I am a queen conscious woman and for men how do we know what a queen conscious woman looks like because I wish I I wish I knew this beforehand because it's like man in the season of my life now I'm okay I'm ready but how do I find a queen conscious woman yeah what what is what does that even look like well uh she knows who she is from her core from her core you know what I'm saying like like you see um you you you you see um okay let's let's do it like this it's like Chevrolet versus Bentley okay yes sir okay my God I got a Bentley I have a friend that has a brand new Bentley and a brand new Rolls-Royce the big the truck thing whatever that thing yeah wrote me around in it the other day yeah well you know when you go to the to the Bentley Place you know you go to the Bentley Place you can't go in there talking about you know haggling and and I think I don't think it's worth it no the people gonna simply say to you this is the price sir this is the price this is not the brand for you Chevrolet is down the street you can haggle for eight hours a day if you choose to do so well why is it that Bentley and Rolls Royce are going to hold true to their value they are defined internally you don't let the marketplace Define them in a queen conscious woman is not a woman that's going to allow you me or anybody else or any group of men to come in and label her or put a price tag on her or rate her yeah per se yeah she knows who she is from the inside yeah and if if if you're not her customer you're free to move on you're not going to shift she's a woman of standard she's the kind of woman that a king a young king like you can trust oh my God you can't trust a woman whose standards always shift shifting you know she she's a woman that has internal estimation she she has a high self concept but yet she's humble she doesn't feel entitled she's a queen conscious woman is a woman that comes into a man's life and she's not seeking to extract she's seeking to deposit wow she's she's adding she's almost like the Proverbs 31 Woman Who had a husband who was Ebola yeah but she had all of these other things going on so she added to the because a marriage is is a merger of of two great entities and they come together to become something greater yeah than either of them would have been as individuals and so you know when you start talking about a queen conscious woman man she's a woman that that always makes her makes a man proud [Music] way to me that woman I've met mine how you feel honestly 28 years 28 years man she says 27 but I say it's 28. how do I feel yeah uh 28 years in yeah you know it's amazing when you find when you find the woman or a woman because I don't believe like there's just one woman in the world but I believe there are certain kinds of women that fit certain kinds of men you find the right kind for you like I did and you grow together and she helps you and you build see everybody there wants a man that's six feet tall six figures six pack well you know high value man but what about the high value couple sometimes a brother needs a woman that says okay I see your grind I see your vision let me get in here and and build with you yeah and let's build together well that's what my wife did with me that's so powerful you know so we we we build there's no need there was no need for a prenup because it wasn't nothing enough you know what I'm saying but we we built together and so you go through all of that with you you have to you you you reach the goals together you grow older together and then you have the history now we're in this point at this phase in life where we have grandkids yeah and now there's the history that it's it's amazing the the love grows deeper and deeper and deeper if I'm wrong I'm in a circle of young successful men like myself right yes sir all of us make anywhere between a half a million to seven plus figures a year all of us love God yes sir um all of us are entrepreneurs I have real good careers I think two of them are doctors and one of them is in the tech field and then the rest of us are entrepreneurs sure thing all black and only want to marry black women we don't want to marry a white woman nothing wrong white people but we're black we're for the black coach yes sir and when we're sitting at the table we'll say man why is it that men we don't feel like we are a prize as well we feel like we gotta do all the chasing or the working and we're not really valued by ladies and so at this at this table all the men say yo listen I'm a king and I expect to be treated like one correct and when God said he told his woman that he was dating that yo you're a prize but so am I and you're going to treat me like a prize should a man feel like a prize personally I don't think so talk to us the Bible says that a man that finds a wife finds a good thing and obtains favor okay but now you know it it it it can be a play on words yeah yeah it can be a play on words I think uh the man does the pursuing yeah the woman does the proving it's the masculine to pursue it's the feminine to approve and to receive and to accept what a man has to have is he has to have the honor and the respect which I think is just you know saying the same thing for the most part when the man says I won't be the prize he's not saying I want to be cherished and put on the shelf life right right like like a woman he's saying I want you to recognize what I bring to the table that's it and I want you to to appreciate me in a way that makes me feel good about continuing to do this yeah that's what my wife does for me wow you just broke that thing you know cats cats oh easily simp Hazel simply teaching his Queen ology stuff and he's talking to the women well if I'm a simp my wife left her career she's already in to work in my business by myself my wife brings me breakfast in bed come on if I'm at home and decide to stay in the bed she'll bring me lunch there too if I'm a simp my wife does what I ask her to do my wife honors Me Oh by myself and the reason I'm motivated you know to to continue is because I'm getting from my wife what I think your generation is asking for yes just respect me just give me honor and respect just give me respect you know just just say to me and that that that is what that again is the result of a generation of women who are struggling with broken Consciousness they they they many times lack the ability to appreciate a good man and so I think I don't use the term prize I like to view women as the prize and see prize is something that you you know you win and you you you cherish it women ought to be cherished men are to be respected and honored and that's what I get from my wife Brothers We Wrong I like the way he just said that I love because when I feel disrespected oh that's it's easy for me to let you go it's over and I feel disrespected when I try to express like I have a hard time I was telling this to one of my good friends Sarah Jakes on her podcast I was like yo listen I have a hard time being vulnerable and being honest with my thoughts correct because when I'm vulnerable and honest with my thoughts you then turn around and say well you shouldn't be thinking like that that sounds like you're insecure it sounds like you have this now I feel disrespected now I'm like all right cool let me shut up let me go in the corner and be goodbye then the next woman I get with I'm like I ain't gonna say nothing correct correct we're traumatizing one another but just saying it all starts though with men absolutely a man see what what a man is asking for the new generation uses this because I hear it a lot yeah I'm the prize too yeah yeah what you're really saying is I I want a woman that's going to really submit to my vision yeah and honor me oh it says submit yeah submit I did I see Jesus you know ladies don't like that turd no they don't like it but here's here's the here's the uh contextual approach to biblical submission talk to us so the submission of the woman is a fruit it is the honor of a man towards the woman that is the root if you want to if you want to reap the fruit of submission you must first sow the seed of Honor a woman cannot submit to a man that is dishonorable now if a man honors you and does not yield it does not yield the fruit of submission that is where your generation is having the breakdown when you you're honoring the woman and you're doing your part and she's she's yet so broken that she cannot yield the fruit of submission and respect that's where your generation is having and when you say honoring the woman was that is that per relationship or is there General Basics that all men should be doing in a relationship when it comes to honoring the woman because my generation we hear you saying I think ladies I think uh when you when I I think when ladies hear that it's like okay he's paying all the bills he's a provider of the home yeah you know what I'm saying yeah I don't have to work he has that yeah um um what else I think ladies are saying of course he's being loyal and faithful to the correct their marriage correct you know you have this generation there's I think there's two kind of ladies in this generation he pays all the bills I'm 50 50 and we both run this house there is no I submit to him it's no we're going to talk about this and we both just gonna either agree disagree or argue it out yeah um I think there is no cookie cutter you know what works for what's worked for Lisa and I for 27 28 years is not necessarily what's going to work for you and your future marriage right and I think it's different across the board now with this 50 50 or he pays all the bills stuff that you all are struggling with today I thank God that I'm not out here trying to create that in a day man this is some crazy stuff it's hard man it really is hard it really is it's it's it many times it's unrealistic yeah because you know what's the percentage of guys that make that kind of money that come on give you that kind of lifestyle without you working in most cases today it's gonna it's gonna require the teamwork it is and it's about it's about the it's about the high value couple as opposed to the high value man the high value man you know you you sitting in the cut when Lisa and I first got married um she made more money than me she was RN I was a little broke preacher I was a young broke preacher so she made more money than me much more money than me but I never felt you know I never felt less than the man I was always the man and I think the thing that really empowered us uh to you know to navigate That season was that we never looked at the money in the house as this my money that's your money we had the understanding from the beginning this is ours absolutely and we're we're building this together so though she was bringing more to the pot than me it was our pot I think today we're more selfish and and we're looking into because everybody's waiting for it to fall apart right so so we're looking at it in terms of this is mine that's yours I need you to pay all of this or I need you to be 50 50. well the whole principle of submission and Hannah is not based on finances yeah yeah it's based on looking at a man and saying I want you to be be my king be my husband looking at a woman saying I want you to be my wife my queen the financing part is a is a separate issue but we've made it the primary you know what Bishop I accept responsibility and I appreciate you for coming on the show and reminding the men to while we are continuing to evolve into being better men we still have to take ownership absolutely and hold each other as men accountable because we can't expect them to change if we're not willing to start the change correct and I accept part of that ownership as a man um and I was telling my team my producer yo we're going to have a conversation with men and we're going to record it and we're just gonna have a real honest conversation and if your schedule allows him and I would love to invite you to come be a part of that conversation I'd love to be you know because I think I think we as a man just really got to step up to the plate and just talk about some things one what are the mistakes that we made two what's happening in our hearts yeah you know and how do we heal from what's happening in our hearts how do we get around older men wiser man like yourself and learn from those correct because sometimes I'll be honest to this day I'm like I'm tired of being a good man yeah to this day I'm tired of being called The Sim so I'm like why men would just go back and just be the the guy who doesn't really care and just live that life because a good man doesn't always yield rewards up front correct correct you know but I know if I go back to my old ways that's not going to yield me any rewards neither no you know I was um having a conversation a difficult conversation with some ladies recently and I asked the question simple question does a man that treats you bad get better treatment and of course they tried to push back on that but when I started unpacking it they had to accept that you start seeing tears flowing many times you know a woman gives a bad guy watch this the curse word submission she submits the man that doesn't even have a vision doesn't even have her best interest and she goes through that over and over and over again and then when she finally gets a good guy she's so broken and there's so much Scar Tissue she can't even respond to the man she should submit to in the proper way so these are conversations we got to have because we're constantly traumatizing one another so what happens she takes the good guy and she fails to submit to him she gives him the problem she should have given the bad guy now the good guy leaves out of that situation and now she's turned it's it's it's a Feeding Frenzy she's turned a good guy in a bad Direction yes so yes this is a this is a necessary conversation that we're gonna have it yes sir we we are going to have it and I'm going to invite you back to the table um and I'm gonna do this here Brothers if you want to be a part of this conversation I don't know when we could do it I'm gonna get with my producer we're gonna do it soon hopefully we can try and do it maybe here but then the next month or so I want you to email Brothers uh yeah email Brothers Anthony O'Neill and inside inside the subject line put brother conversation and email Brothers Anthony o'neal.com and we're going to go through uh that and uh man we're just gonna really just bring in the brothers and you know what I may even find a venue yes sir I may even find a venue put all Brothers on the stage my team over there shaking their heads I put Brothers on the stage and put ladies in the audience oh my God and just have a simple conversation and I may even just invite these I may even have this conversation at my house just make it very intimate yes sir and just make it Brothers talking and ladies just sitting on the couch and just listening I think it'll be helpful I think it really will yeah and I think we got to have some real good honest transparent conversations taking ownership correct and then also Brothers speaking to their what's in their hearts correct um and ladies just listening and I hate to say it you ain't talking and saying nothing correct sometimes I believe ladies need to be quiet sometime unless men speak correct and and be an active listener so you can learn and then vice versa men we need to shut up correct and listen and be active listeners so if you want to be a part of that conversation I don't know uh when we're going to be able to do this my guys are already over there shaking their heads like he didn't put something else on our plate in itinerary but you know that's the good thing about being the boss you know what I'm saying I can say hey this is what we doing because I think it's needed yeah and my team is not shocked yes uh because I've been saying like ladies are saying like men are intimidated by their um by their success and I'm like I'm not intimidated by your success I don't care how much money you made that isn't but you can make more money than me now how you make me feel it's not intimidation that's my truth of how you make me feel and it goes back to what you said do you honor me and do you respect me correct and I don't think ladies understand what this honor and respect mean on the man side of things no they do not and so I think we as I'm evolving here's what I've learned Bishop and this is where I look for you all to Help Me Grow is I don't understand women yeah I don't understand how they think sometimes and then I realize they don't understand how they think no that's the problem it's not bad people connecting not at all it's two great people connecting right but don't know how to understand each other's communication correct and I think if we can get that man we'll have more successful marriages I believe that I believe that so if you want to be a part of conversation email Anthony no email Brothers Anthony o'neal.com ladies if you just want to see an audience and just not an audience I don't know how we're going to do it but if you want to be in a room and just listen in um as well maybe even ask questions email Brothers Anthony o'neal.com and put in the subject line sister want to listen sister want to listen and brothers in this in the subject line put Brothers want to be in it I'm in the subject line and we'll we'll figure it out and we'll be reaching out to people because this is going to be a real conversation man so listen we're going to drop RC Blake's information in today's show notes his YouTube page has over 600 000 subscribers on there and he's he's one of the only ones him and Tony Gaskins in my personal opinion who are dropping wisdom from a Biblical perspective and they keep it real and so we're going to drop his information in there if you're in the Texas area go check out his church uh and just really subscribe to everything this man is teaching and we're going to drop a direct link to his course to ladies and you can learn the queenology how to become a conscious Queen uh for your future man and not just for your future man for yourself correct it's up so we love you we thank you and we'll see you in the next show peace [Music] [Music] thank you [Music] thank you

Channel: The Table With AO

Views: 152,404

Keywords: anthony oneal, anthony oneal student loans, money, how to save money, personal finance, debt free, how to budget, how to make money, how to get out of debt, Dave Ramsey, earn your leisure, black wealth, wealth, credit card debt, building black wealth, Union Church, graham stephan, financial education, rc blakes, tony gaskins, dating advice, queenology rc blakes, rc blakes jr, toxic relationships, mr letgo, stephen speaks, relationship goals mike todd

Id: QLFbWdAuydw

Length: 60min 59sec (3659 seconds)

Published: Mon Oct 17 2022