SORTEDFood // Dad joke of the week pt 2

it's that joke how do you keep intruders out of a castle made of cheese don't know you build a moat Sorella moat that is almost the worst one you've ever done and it's look it's made me angry no that's not even maybe you don't get it it's not even a poem that is terrible I've burnt 2,000 calories yesterday yeah so I've been doing a little bit of research do you know how you make holy water I don't you boil the hell out of it speaking of bells but it's a horrible introduction convergence of the way their joke of the week has become one of the best parts of sorted so lots of tweets I get sake what type of vegetable tries to play it cool that doesn't really succeed I have no idea a radish that is yeah and I can't even believe I exhale that was on laughing come on what do you call a milk that gives bad count another disappointment a milk that gives bad cow so sorry Oh what is the fastest dessert in the world you're welcome what we heard about the new garlic well supposedly you eat five cloves of garlic for every meal you don't really lose much weight but apparently you look thinner from a distance mistake mistake everyone's when you're already stinking we will find out by what fish at the market the other day asks for the fishmonger to wrap it up and so I could take it home when I got home realize he taken all the insides out got it yeah that dub that yeah that was it what goes in hard and dry and comes out soft and wet chewing gum what were you thinking on yep I'm happy with the chewing gum aren't sir and for that the average Jewish man prefers t he brews himself I don't even know to cannibals capture a man and to make it fair they decided to start eating him from either end and as the guy who started at the head in gets better halfway through he says oh hey getting on and the other cannibal says I'm having a ball when two cows go to bed don't know when it's past your bedtime Patty's up for a rude why couldn't Harry Potter tell the difference between his cooking and his best mate why Jamie because they're both they're both called see you've heard of Murphy's Law right everything that can go wrong will be heard of coleslaw it's just ready cabbage come on coleslaw there is my nice sometimes carrots how did the Burger King get the Dairy Queen pregnant don't know forgot to wrap his whopper not appropriate what do you get when you cross an English lesson with alcohol pass how tequila Mockingbird Joanna dress you in that school no but I have drunk ela so I was walking down the street the other day and a guy just stood there and threw milk yogurt and cheese at me I just thought how dairy did the Buddhist monk say to the hot dog vendor I do not know what did the Buddhist monk say to the hot dog vendor give me one with everything no make me now did you hear the one about the pirate who became a chef I didn't hear the one about the Potemkin chef they say he mastered the seven seas since that is tenuous see I feel like we need to do better I was sent it on Twitter and I thought that it was a quite good one why do cows have hooves okay it's gonna be a good one because they lactose well where can you buy chicken broth in bulk I don't know the stock market is expecting a brothel oh really called a vegetable having an epileptic fit what is long green and slimy and smells like pork take three the first-tier unusable have you seen the movie about the hot dog no it's an Oscar wiener first yeah I thought you did [Music] you're setting up that don't you I hate you so much why'd you do that the first restaurant on the moon opened last week yeah mixed reviews apparently the food's great but no matter sphere are you yeah yep yeah I smiled mmm how do you turn white chocolate into dark chocolate then there you could how do you gently turn light off it's not a lot man walks into a bar says could have some helicopter crisps please the barman says sorry where any surf plane it's a there's a double meaning is plane these like ground off this video run into a girl at a vegan restaurant who said she knew me I'd never met her before liked it how many apples grow on a tree I don't know all of them what's the difference between tuna a piano and glue sticky keys don't know Pass you can tune a piano but you can't piano a tuna what I could do a glue I thought you'd get stuck on that bit why did that man go to the beach with some guacamole because he wanted to take a dip in the sea so I was talking to my mate who's a snail the other day and he went into a car dealership to buy a a new car it was a break1 it didn't have a roof on it and the car salesman said is there anything else that I can do for you and the snail said actually I've really liked it if you could just paint him else on the doors I know where this is going Jamie because it's gonna be a food-related joke so the salesman said on we can definitely sort that out for you and put canals why do you want an s painted on the doors and the snail said well usually snails are quite slow but I would like to think that when I'm driving my car along the road people will turn and look and say look that escargot tell them what kind of pizza do you order on Christmas I do not know cheese's crust or even a part that's very close to Jesus maybe I'm saying it wrong what's the difference between you and eggs I would sounds slightly more intelligent that eggs get late and you don't brilliant we will see you on Wednesday goodbye what's it called when one chickpea murders another don't know who must side boom us cuz chickpeas make hummus don't they that was bad

Channel: Shannon

Views: 52,353

Keywords:

Id: OJt5e-hWR3Q

Length: 8min 55sec (535 seconds)

Published: Mon Mar 04 2019