Some Classic David Mitchell Rants | Alan Carr Chatty Man | The Talk Show Channel

I wouldn't be lying to you if I said my first guest was the Crown Prince of the comedy panel show put your hands together for the brilliant David MIT father [Applause] [Music] [Applause] gent oh hello and what lovely music to come on to yes I I go everywhere to that music what can I get you to drink love oh we've got bicardi breather we got iron Brew vodka iron Brew yeah that sounds disgusting sorry about that my Lord I mean I mean what about this Aftershock and a bit of that I've I've never had after youve never had Aftershock it's that people have it like before and meal it's just like it's lovely yeah just have a little bit I'll try a little after shop yeah why not is that the appropriate glass for an after shop well if you want a pint of it this is going to get messy and there's Bombay mix there oh thank you yeah and I know you've got your beard yes well you saying I can always eat that well no some people might not want Bombay mix because it might you know get stuck in their beard I know yeah it's unfortunately having a beard renders all eating disgusting there's always a snack oh genuinely I don't know if you've read the twits by Royal Dar yes but there's there's a very moving piece in that about the things that can remain for months or years in a man's beard oh um and then he can snack on future occasions and I'm afraid to say it's very true there's no there's no health and safety on that no best before date on something that's congealed in your beard weeks ago oh that's disgusting I mean you are like the lady gagar of the comedy world you're always changing your image aren't you what made you think of the beard why do you keep people guessing well you know I I as as you rightly say I'm I'm a chameleon um uh I I don't know I just thought you know my it's something I have I haven't tried mine yet I'll give it a go there we go here we go it's going to be fine here we are excuse me I can't do it I can't sip it can a beard reject Aftershock my [Music] [Applause] God and what what's getting your goat at the minute what's making you rant the thing that's been annoying me at the moment has been the early onset of Christmas to be honest I I sort of hate the fact that you turn on the television and all of the advertisements are all about Christmas and Christmas to me it's quite a while away I've got to do quite a lot of things before Christmas or my life will collapse you know I will have be in breach of various contracts and and I don't like being reminded that it's on its way I'd be very happy to let's talk about Christmas on the 23rd of December I do a bit of shopping on the 23rd of December 24th of December get pissed 25th of December turkey over lovely I like Christmas there's no need to talk about it yet thank you was that a good old my God or a bad one I think it was a bad one I must say um uh no I I think you know you with The Bard you know you for all my life since puberty my face has been able to do something namely develop hair yeah and I'd never tried it out so I thought I'll try it out and you know you just do nothing it happens and this was a surprise for me you get a sense of achievement out of it you were single for a while then you grew a beard and then you got married well that's actually not the sequence of events no I'm sorry I was single for as you rightly say a while it really did feel like a while um and then I stopped being single and then I subsequently grew a beard oh right yeah I thought your wife was a pogn ofile she is is that the word for someone who likes a beard yes Chatty Man is educational and entertaining and well she she likes my beard say she had a beard then she does I didn't I didn't I didn't grow a beard to copy her yeah I mean with with the Christmas thing I see see what you're saying cuz they were like started on about the 1st of November weren't it that's saw that Aros Christmas catalog it makes me go cold when I see it though don't you now the advertising for Christmas not actually an Aros catalog actually if you're starting telling people about Christmas sort of mid October that's how far through the year is that quick bit of math it's just over three qus of the way through the year yes that's right now that's like saying to people what's the average age of death about mid 70s yeah it's like saying to people when they're sort of in their late 50s around 60 Now's the Time to start planning for death have you picked out your coffin what hyms are you going to have do you fancy burial or burning yeah now I would say that an insensitive thing to say to someone who's 58 and still full of life hasn't even retired yet and so in percentage terms it is the same they are robbing us of the same amount of our lives every year by starting talking about Christmas before it's even Halloween uh no she likes it or you know it wouldn't have last as long if if she didn't she she's Victoria Corin yes and I was thinking you're David Mitchell that you're right yeah yes I do my research on this I'm thinking David and Victoria do you ever ring up restaurants to pretend to be the beckhams that would be great H St in Victoria here well I mean the honest answer to that is no we don't basically if I rang up and put on David Beckham's voice and rang a wrestle and said hello I I I can't really do it I'm David Beckham can I have a table in the restaurant and I I would just be lying the fact that I'd be lying very slightly less because I share his first name it's not really any excuse there're still going to be [ __ ] disappointed oh I suppose so yeah I didn't think it through really one what I like to do is take a well-meaning Avenue for hum and then close it cheers I'll drink to that I find this strangely addictive yeah oh God they're doing the dancing next year for Comic release have you been asked um I haven't been asked and I don't I don't think I think I'd be I think a I would be terrible B I would hate it now he would thank you very much the one person assume it's one person it could be someone who's just having some sort of fit no I I I don't think I'd enjoy the dancing and I think the country would enjoy it less I think people would start withdrawing money from comic release they'd be essentially going I'm sorry [ __ ] the third world if he's going to do that let them starve yes give me that well back yeah exactly I'll take that thank you very he's pissed in my metaphorical well let us do that literally what people would think that rage would come into their otherwise charitable heads at the sight of me trying to dance was it something I said is straight after Homeland on Sunday now we'll need a laugh won't we after that clar day for an hour why should people watch Homeland and your show rather than X Factor in downtown oh H you're like Paxman I am I do all this Camp [ __ ] and then I'm boom you don't have to decide you you can watch both yes I know yeah um but also I I think I think Homeland and my program are better than the X Factor and Downtown Abby I must say I do like Downtown Abby yes I like it is Dar I mean it's some of the darest plots I've ever seen but that's part of the appe said something about it haven't you it not making sense I I've said there was the point the point when they were cover ing the first world war seemed to me odd in that there would there would be a sort of scene when it was sort of six months later cuz someone had just been to the front and back and but the conversations in the in the downstairs bit it was sort of like remember that lost teaspoon I mentioned the other day but you didn't mention it the other day you mentioned it six months ago this this the guys upstairs had the chance to go to you know the third battle of e lose a leg have you know Cera recover be wheelchair bound stand up and you're still talking about the te yeah it's like it's almost like the upstairs bit was naria yeah where time was working at a different speed also none of the servants had to go to the war way around they were all carted off weren't they I'm pretty sure the war the first world war was not exclusively fought by the Posh now are you going to watch sexbox next week on Channel 4 I I might watch sexbox cuz we have a link to that that don't we do we have a link to sex pox oh yeah we were there yes we were there at the filming yeah not in the Box yeah we were there they were saying there was a secret project we were filming the big fat quiz of the ' 80s and they said a secret project is being a secret project to do with sex is being filmed in the studio next door cuz it was really weird because there like The Green Room you're just sitting there there was like Jason Donovan Sarah Green me and new Jimmy car and then a man in a kimono with a hard on and you're like that that turned out to be a gun actually oh yeah I know welcome to Friday night with meet Jonathan welcome Alan Jesus I've just being oh don't passione a

Channel: The Talk Show Channel

Views: 15,311

Keywords: talk show, chat show, comedy, funny, comedy video, full interview, full episode, #comedy, #talkshow, #chatshow, Classic, David Mitchell, Rant, David Mitchell Rant, wilty, would i lie to you david, david rant, comedy rant, Alan Carr Chatty Man, David Mitchell Peep Show, Peep Show, Classic Rant

Id: Bd2i4TMxUiw

Length: 11min 2sec (662 seconds)

Published: Wed Nov 29 2023