Shift From Burnout To Brilliance | Anna Choi | TEDxWilmington

what preciousness [Music] [Applause] this is what Brilliance looks like and feels like for me it wasn't always this way I hit my first burnout when I was 16 years old on the outside I had it all a solid upbringing loving family great friends a good boyfriend I was a scholar athletes an award-winning violinist elected by my peers to be student body vice president yet despite all of these achievements I felt empty guilt weighed me down for not being happier and I questioned living life itself is this it my parents had just gotten divorced raised by my single mom a lot of financial pressure sister off to college day after day three hours of sports practice followed by keeping up with college credit courses running off five hours of sleep I remember driving to my violin lesson an hour and a half each way nodding off at the wheel almost veering off into semi trucks whizzing past at 60 miles per hour now some might look at this scene and say get more sleep cut out your commitments do less but this is our first Pitfall to burnout treating symptoms of burnouts not the source now due to too many inconsistencies in both definitions across burnout studies as well as assessment methods how I'm about to Define burnout and talk about it and Brilliance is purely anecdotal based on my own personal experience and of my work with clients but what we've discovered is that the source of burnout is from a major misalignment of one's life this could look like oh I'm not living life true to myself in one particular area it could be I'm not living my life's purpose in general some of you have settled for a financially secure life that's not quite fulfilling but I'm awesome I love my my life it's good some of you have quit dreaming you've been hit and burned one too many times you don't want to face another rejection or another failure Elgin but deep down inside there is something missing that you cannot run or hide from and this is the first key to brilliance Focus on feeling flow those moments of joy that you feel just bubbling out of you for no reason now here's a quick test if you're like I don't know if I'm in Burnout or brilliance we're going to ask a very powerful question are you guys ready yes awesome okay so feel free to keep your eyes open or closed in this exercise we're about to do you're gonna go ahead and sit and relax back in your chair feel your feet on the ground you're back against the seat that's it take a few deep breaths in and out placing your hands on your heart ask yourself this powerful question if I were to pass away right now am I ready and if you feel any version of no ask again what lights me up what gives me joy then listen listen your brain may want to chat an automatic response to set that aside and feel with your body the response listen through to the other side of the silence you might hear a gentle whisper or loud jarring command for some of you you'll feel or see a vision or just an inner knowing that arises so be open to the many ways that your heart's intuition communicates with you and then go have fun and discover and feel and focus on those moments of flow where every single cell in your body is screaming yes yes now remember your source of burnout and Brilliance will be unique to you so don't go ask your friends and family or look it up online or even hire a professional trust that the answer is within use your body as an inner Compass to focus on feeling flow for me what lit me up and filled me with joy was dancing and singing my biggest source of burnout was denying the brightest parts of myself my passion to sing and dance it took me decades to even admit it ah it's not what makes money it's impractical it's not what a good Korean American would do to create success it's a hobby I don't have time for a hobby can any of you relate yet I couldn't deny it at 16 years old I'd be alone at home music my Solas stressed out my life and I turned the music all the way up loud volume and start dancing full on MTV music style then I'd hear the garage going tick tick tick tick oh Mom's home I would jump over the couch run over to the stairs it was the stereo I'm dating myself and turn it down and then pretend I was reading the entire time but it couldn't help but leak out and this is the first the second key to brilliance is allow your inner passions to shine out the pitfall is thinking that it's outside yourself like you have to go discover or search for your passion or purpose like it's unknown or some mystery um consider your passion is like this big brilliant sun that's trying to express itself all the time if you allow it consider your passion is so natural to you like the air you breathe you may not even notice it but just look at your online search history see what you're curious about what do you obsess about for me my son loves him a good spreadsheet he's obsessed with data sets whether that's for sports teams or video game characters or the largest U.S cities in their populations at two years old you could see him meticulously arrange all of his toy animals by shape and size and type that wasn't even supposed to be a joke so your passions can be so obvious trust that they're already with it now this brings us to our third Pitfall of burnout making burnout bad oh I have to prevent burnout or fix it yes maybe not consider burnout is your friend it is the signpost that is telling you to get back on track to your brilliance now just like any good friend if you keep ignoring the warning signs that burnout's trying to give you well they're gonna get louder for you to pay attention so some of you out here like actually most human beings are really great at ignoring burnouts warning sets if it looked like this I'm gonna just it's been a long day I'm just gonna binge on Netflix next episode next episode or I'm gonna work really late at this night oh crap it's already 2 A.M I guess I'm not gonna get sleep or oh just one more glass of wine just one more my boy's gonna hate me tomorrow but just one more ignoring Bernard's warning signs can also be with healthy habits like I'm gonna track all my nutrition steps I'm gonna travel to this Meditation Retreat and then that Meditation Retreat or I'm going to take this personal growth program and in this personal growth program and in this personal growth program can any of you relate that was me with me all these things are valuable and they have their place except when you use them as an escape for where burnouts trying to redirect you back on your path to brilliance but I get it some of you will continue to ignore pronounce warning signs and that's when Brown slaps in the face to really pay attention with a life-threatening disease oops my spouse leaves oh I go in the ER oh someone dies or a crisis that you cannot ignore so please honor respect burnout as your buddy that's always there for you nudging you back on that path are you sure you're on the right path here this brings us to our third key to brilliance which is to relax a business mentor of mine in college was a Collegiate athlete in rowing and there's this one team that every year would win head over shoulders over all the other teams curious to their success he's like interviewing the crew leader asking hey what is your secret are you guys like working out in the gym or you've got some sort of special supplement that you're taking I think there's like oh no it's what I'm not doing you see before every push forward I focus on completely relaxing and recharging but for the next push we have so much energy by the end that we just blast through the finish line every year and win the race I was struck who wins the race in life is not who's pushing the hardest it's who knows how to relax the best contrary to conventional thinking of top performance whether you're an athlete or an entrepreneur a parent a teacher a student hinges on how well you can relax how good are you at relaxing recovering of a charging between work sprints how what if we in our work performance metrics instead of work performance metrics we had relaxation metrics hey you're on the top of the leaderboard because you took the most time off or hey how low is your heart rate today what if our society Port is much funding as it does into technology apps for productivity and efficiency and doing twice as much in half the time towards the Arts of relaxation how good are you at relaxing now slowing down and surrendering to your control tend to go hand in hand with relaxation but I get it sometimes life hits your heart when you least expect it and it's at those moments that are actually the best accelerants for learning relaxation the most painful and dire of situations when I water birth my son no drugs 14 hours of early labor water hadn't yet broken I risked having to go back home because I hadn't dilated enough I was in the most immense pain imaginable I thought my body was going to explode and I had no choice but to surrender control of all outcomes and when I did that my body relaxed it took over I went into a deep meditation my water broke I went from four to ten centimeters of dilation in one hour which is unheard of for a first-time birth and in the next hour through four pushes bursts my baby boy in the water my most painful situation became the most empowering Miracle of my life because I relaxed when you relax life flows through you when you relax your inner Brilliance can shine relaxing is your portal to brilliance for any dream that you desire any Vision that you want to manifest any passion that you want to cultivate is possible when you relax the body's tension you have everything you need within you your body is this instrument of Brilliant Energy that's trying to express itself patiently waiting for you to let it out and unleash its fullest potential what you focus on is what will grow so stop treating symptoms of burnout and instead focus on feeling flow you don't need to go look outside yourself for Passions they're inside of you already you were born with it trust that and just notice it and don't make burnout bad burnout is your front redirecting it back on the path to brilliance where you can then relax in a six-month Songwriter's Journey I went from oh no you can't make me sing Solo in public in front of two people I don't have a good enough voice I'm just average I can't hit high notes okay it didn't sound like that I have to practice really really hard for me or else I'm gonna Biff it in performance time and in six months I went to singing at a Global Peace concert releasing my first original song alongside a seven-time Emmy Award winner on a global stage hitting the high notes like the best of them and I barely practiced the key is relaxing I'm gonna Now sing for you an excerpt from that world peace concert song that I sang called in Rapture adapting the lyrics to this talk Boundless Energy pours right through me grounded in the hair and now a lineage of wisdom comes before me what are you who waiting for you are blessed and happiness you surrender to the flow I'm always here alive feel every Tears are Falling Down the air we breathe that's all [Music] right let your brilliant shine just relax focus on joyful moments that move you feel your passions flow from inside of you burn out your friend enough dare to feel and let go allowing love inside to shine your life foreign

Channel: TEDx Talks

Views: 104,805

Keywords: Behavior, Business, English, Health, Mental health, TEDxTalks, [TEDxEID:51700]

Id: EjUjuROasT4

Length: 17min 15sec (1035 seconds)

Published: Mon Jul 03 2023