Set Yourself Free part I and II

hi there welcome to my home on a Sunday thank you for dropping in I know you guys are probably busy you got lots going on lots to do so I really appreciate you taking the time to pop in and and see to see what's happening on my front so you know it's been really cold here and this morning I was freezing when I woke up and I don't know if you're anything like me you find it hard to get out of bed when it's really cold I find it really hard to get out from under the blankets we don't turn on the heating at night because we figure it's gonna get too hot so we get under the blanket and I was telling Danny we moved to Southern California for the warm weather so this was it's been a bit of a surprise these last few days and so this this morning I wanted to do this Facebook live and I decided to put on my cozy cause Mena shawl so anyway last the last couple of videos I did I talked about mmm empathy I talked about being super sensitive I talked about being an empath and I even talked about Asperger's Asperger's syndrome and interestingly those last couple of videos particularly the very last one has probably created more discussion and comments then than most of my videos probably with the exception of one which was on on love and how I think it retitled it how on earth did I find Annie that was the only other one that really created as many comments if not more comments than the last one I did and that last one I did I just did it on Friday - a couple of days ago so it was a bonus one I just threw in this week because I just had this urge to share a few things with you which had transpired from the previous video so if you haven't watched the one from Friday I would love for you to watch it because today I wanted to speak a little bit more I wanted to start by speaking a little bit more about labels so I mentioned in the last video how I've always been I always avoid labels I've always been loath to use labels and so over time when a lot of people who'd read my books and read my work and watch my videos had said to me that you we think you're an empath you should take the empath test we think you could be an empath I kind of I I sort of thought yeah I do feel a lot of empathy maybe too much but I didn't really take the test I thought oh we're comprised of so many things including empathy but as I mentioned to you last week when I took the test I was like whoa this is this is me and what's happened as a result it helped me to unravel or to understand better how to deal with the world and so even though I may have had a near-death experience and the near-death experience may have allowed me to truly expose myself to Who I am exposed myself to myself all the layers uncovered and I may Know Who I am who I came here to be who I'm supposed to be but what the test did for me and reading up on empaths it gave me a comparison of Who I am and the type of personality I have compared to everybody else and so even though I don't like to lock people into labels it became very interesting information as to how to go about in this world and I want to speak to you a little bit about both the information about how to go about in this world as well as the label like where labels can be a positive thing in terms of giving you information but make sure you never lock yourself in the label otherwise you can limit yourself so firstly I just want to remind you that you know for those of you who don't know me I had a near-death experience as a result of end-stage cancer when the doctors said I had died I'd gone into a coma and my organs had shut down but when but what happened was that I actually left my physical body and when I had left my physical body I realized that not only was I not my physical body I was also not my gender my race my culture my beliefs and all of those things those were all layers that had accumulated over this lifetime and including even our gender our religion our culture all these things are part of our biology they are not part of our spirit when we cross over we lose all those things we leave them all behind and so this is one of the reasons that I have since the near-death experience rejected labels because a label limits you when you are so much more and I realized without all those labels I was something far greater and yet I have now learnt that a lot of these things that we call labels like when we learn about Asperger's when we learn about even when you learn about Down syndrome or autism or empaths these are descriptions that help you to learn more about who you are in comparison to what we think is the norm so in a way it gives us it gives it sort of gives us a radar it gives us a framework if you will where we know that oh okay this is why I feel weird because it seems that only 5% of the world or 10% or 15% of the world thinks this way and so that this is why and so in order to get my message across or in order to express myself I need to realize that people are not going to receive it the way I think and so this and this is how it helps you to navigate the world when you learn about these different things about yourself so this morning in fact it not just this morning the last few days Danny and I have been having a lot of deep conversation about this because it's been the topic I've been talking about and because of the reaction I've been getting and because of what it's done within me it's been a topic of huge interest for me and so we were talking about Asperger's and we were talking about empaths and Danny said to me something really interesting he actually said I don't know if the Asperger's is something I was born with or if it's something that was learned if it's if it was a conditioning because of my childhood experiences and I thought that was really interesting and although we can't be a hundred percent sure of the answer to this it led to a really great conversation and I would love to hear your thoughts on this do you think that you were born an empath do you think you were born with Asperger's do you think you were born you know with with anything else or do you think it's something that you accumulated during this life do you think it was something that you agreed to come here with what does it feel for you when you turn inward what does it really feel for you so here's the conversation that we had and by the way I always go back and read your comments and so that's why I love to hear them because what it does is you actually inform me as to what you want me to speak more about and that's why I love hearing from you and my perspective is given to you from the perspective of having died and left my body and having faced death and knowing what it feels like to face whatever whether it's regrets for things that I haven't done and reaching the point of death or whether what does it feel like when we leave our bodies behind what is important what isn't important and that's the perspective that I like to give you on everything and what I realized in the other realm is that is that who we truly are is something far far greater than all these layers and so what I feel for myself is that I came here as somebody who had these super sensitive feelings where I was absorbing the emotions of other people I mean I believe I was born with them I believe it was part of my genetic makeup and perhaps it was even something that I had agreed to come in with in fact I'm pretty certain it was it was something that I had agreed to come in with and Danny on the other hand feels that his Asperger's is not something that he came in with but that a lot of Asperger's is not who you are but it is behavior it's learned behavior because when I talk about empathy an empath this is what he says to me he says I feel empathy I feel that I can walk into a room and feel the energy in the same way you do but I don't wear it on my physical body the way you do and this is the difference between him and me he's able to compartmentalize it and identify it as belonging to someone else I'm not and that's the big difference between us it's not that it doesn't feel it it's not that I mean he's the first one to go and rescue a person or a dog or an animal he has the biggest heart ever but because he is able to compartmentalize sometimes that that big heart is misinterpreted and he tells me that he thinks that he developed this ability to not absorb emotions of other people or the ability to compartmentalize and process because he was bullied extremely badly as a very very young child much it was bullied when he was far younger than me and in a much worse manner and I know I've expressed to you in my book dying to be me and also I touched on it and what if this is heaven how I was bullied as a child and how that contributed to the layers now I was aware of this from the time Danny and I been married that he was bullied much worse than me because he grew up in a in a really rough part of town and and he was you know being being Indian he was like one of very very few brown people person of color and also he was a little on the chubby side and so the kids used to wait for him to show up and they would come and beat him up they would literally beat him up and he says that his Asperger's was actually something he developed as a survival mechanism and so he said that much later in life and really much later in fact a lot of it was catalyst after meeting me he started to really learn new behaviors that were more socially acceptable so he was telling me that the reason why he gets misinterpreted a lot is because a lot of social behaviors that come naturally to other people he learned them much later in life because he developed very hostile behaviors he he didn't trust people and and because of that bullying which was persistent constant where he was ignored when he tried to report it when he tried to complain he was belittled for it that he ended up not trusting the world and locking everybody out and this is what's affected his behavior so I thought that was really interesting and that's why I wanted to put it out there and to hear from you whether you believe that your your empathy comes from being born with it or something you you accumulated and also your Asperger's or whatever else so what was really interesting was to find that if he was to take an empathy test he would get a very different score from me and that in that he feels empathy he feels that he's aware of it but he is able to actually create boundaries he is able to say no easier than I am when it's something that when he feels that somebody is manipulating him so for example if someone genuinely needs help he's the first one to be there but his sensitivity or his empathy levels are so strong that he can immediately tell if it's a real cry for help or if somebody is actually manipulating or using empathy or using somebody's empathy to manipulate them so he can usually immediately tell if I'm being manipulated which is really interesting now dr. Christiane Northrup has done some amazing work recently which I would highly recommend that you guys check out she has been putting out some videos and she's written a book on to do with energy vampires I'm forgetting the full title but it is it does say something like energy vampires and one of you can maybe post it in the comments I can always post it later I would highly recommend you listen to her summits her recent video and maybe even purchase her book I just love her I really love her and I love the fact that she has started to talk about this subject as well so now an energy vampire is somebody who needs your energy and it's at the cost of your own energy in other words it's it's someone who's latched on to you so there's a difference between somebody who actually needs your help you know it's different like if you have a special needs child or you have an aging parent they're not deliberately manipulating you but dr. Christian Northrup talks about energy vampires who actually homed in on em paths because they are bottomless pits who need energy at the cost of your energy in other words when they are drinking your energy it replenishes them all the time and that's a completely different thing and that's something that there people like Danny and many others in the world who are able to identify and separate themselves and compartmentalize whereas in what are truly all out and paths or what Christiane Northrup calls old soul empaths they can't differentiate and what I've noticed personally in looking back on my own life is that even when I realize I need to have stronger boundaries and I need to learn to say no for many of us and I know it applies to many of you it's really hard to develop these stronger boundaries it's really hard to even say no even though you realize I should be saying no and you still have trouble saying no and the other thing we need to do is to learn to receive more learn to recharge our batteries I want you to let's check out my last video for more information on that but many people even have trouble doing that we have to remind ourselves every day so here's what I discovered though is that for so for those of us who have difficulty developing the tools developing the tools to cope with the empathy to cope with the energies we're absorbing everyday what I realize though is that we are also the very same people who are deeply in touch with our inner self so those of us who feel the energies of the world around us who are deeply sensitive to the world around us to the point where we feel overwhelmed we are also deeply connected and deeply sensitive to our infinite self our real self that was the self that I was when I died when I left my body when all these layers left me I realized that my infinite self was powerful my infinite self had a purpose my infinite self came here with an intention and it came here with the intention to be and do all that I could be and what happens within with an empath who doesn't know how to cope with their emotions they lose their infinite self and in in actuality you never really lose it it's always there but it gets buried under the layers of it gets buried under the layers of the noise from the outer world which we are also sensitive to it gets buried under the layers of the emotions of everybody else around us those who are needy those who are draining our energy those who are who are psychological or energy vampires it gets drained even by people who genuinely need us and we're not able to be there for those who genuinely need us because we can't differentiate in the noise who genuinely needs us and because we can't differentiate and we're giving our energy away to a lot of the people we shouldn't be we end up getting drained that we can't even be there for ourselves so what I suggest is that instead of focusing on developing tools let's focus on setting ourselves free let's focus on letting go of all the layers that we've accumulated and set ourselves free and then excuse me an analogy that I still love but I use it a lot I know I use it a lot but I still love it is the one where Michelangelo who carves these beautiful statues of angels out of rock and marble was once asked how do you do that how do you carve these beautiful statues and he says the angel was always there I just chipped until I set it free and why I love that is because for me that death state set me free it set me free from all these layers and so what I've realized that for me what works is that instead of learning more tools on how to cope with being an empath it's not about learning more tools it's about chipping away at what is not me and setting myself free so when I get in touch with that infinite self and allow that infinite self to shine through that actually overrides my need to develop tools for boundaries so if I don't even bother to think about oh I need to develop boundaries I need to learn to say no no instead I ask myself what is my purpose why did I come here why am i an empath how is it a gift how can I use this gift to the world and allow the passion and the energy of getting in touch with my truth with my authentic self with my infinite self getting back in touch with that which I've stopped plugging into getting back in touch with that that is what drives the passion to move forward and it becomes my focus instead of my focus being how do I set boundaries how is this person bringing me down why are they bringing me down oh my god I feel so awful they're draining my energy so it's a case of shifting the focus from that - Who am I why am I here what is my passion I'm built this way for a reason let me set that reason free let me set the real me free I'd like you to start thinking about it in that way because I know that in the beginning when I first came back and I started sharing my story I too allowed the naysayers and everybody to get me down and I know one of the questions that came up after my last video is that how do I not allow the people to get me down even if I'm doing what I'm doing there are people who don't believe in me they're people who come confront me and I'm non-comp a tional that's exactly how I am I hate confrontation I avoid it I and so when I was when I first started sharing my story when I first started sharing it when I first came back I wanted to shout it from the rooftops because I really thought everybody would benefit from it but the Internet is a minefield and there were people who were saying things to me like oh yeah try telling that love saved your life try telling that to someone on chemo dying of cancer and and the truth is that even comments like that even though they felt terrible at the time they made me get more clarity in what I was saying those were the kinds of some of the feedback of course there were a lot of people that related to what I was saying but I was deeply impacted by the ones that were the the naysayers the skeptics the debunkers and I was aware that they were doing this from their own pain their own fear their own even it could be from their own empathy of dealing with people who had cancer and they were hurt that these people were dying and I I had the chance to live but yet it felt really painful for me to continue sharing however even though I stopped sharing it made me turn inward and it made me ask myself what would be the answers to their questions and that is the thing about somebody who has an empathic or an empathic type of personality or who's a deep empath is that not only do they feel strongly the noise from the world outside someone else would have said oh they're just naysayers ignore them but no I wanted to be able to answer their questions and I dug deep for the right words the right answers and it niggled me until I was able to really get the right languaging because I felt there was a purpose it happened to me I felt that I could help people and so what I wanted to say is that even though I went quiet for a while I stopped sharing for a while I didn't stop thinking about the things they were saying to the point where it turned out to be a gift because I was able to actually turn inward enough to dig out the right words the right analogies the right way to truly get deep into what I was trying to say to the point that when I was ready Wayne Dyer discovered my story and Wayne Dyer brought it out into the world which to me was an endorsement or proof that what I believed that my purpose was to come back and share it and he his discovering my story was actually in an endorsement or proof from the universe that what I felt that calling I felt was a true calling so even the naysayers in the end were a gift because they helped me to develop the language I needed and for me it wasn't about creating the boundaries although I did I did need to retreat I did read need to retreat and turn inwards but my point is that instead of developing tools to develop boundaries maybe the answer is to turn in with inwards and get in touch with your real self your true self and set that true self free that's what I was trying to say so thank you for that and for reminding me what I was saying when the sound cut so let's go with more questions Elena earlier she scored 36 Asperger's and 75 on empath she said weird but I always felt other people's energies and even more I mirror those energies but at the same time I was still detached and somehow cold for other people's situations see that's very interesting and I would say a personality like you would make an incredibly good health care worker incredibly good because you are able to detach you know I'm gonna share with you where not one day when I was a youngster like really young maybe I was a teenager and I was watching a movie on TV with my family we were sitting in the living room one evening after dinner with my mom my dad my brother and myself and there was this movie that was you know not violent not it was like completely a I don't know what you call it here is it r-rated or whatever we're teenagers and kids that's fine for them to watch it but there was one scene in this movie where this woman was driving a car and for some reason she wasn't wearing a seatbelt and she drives as con she was in this horrific accident when she shot out of the front windscreen and she was covered in blood her entire face was covered in blood and she had glass all over her and I am so sorry that I've just been so graphic because there's some of you watching this that maybe you know it's freaking you out or making you sick but there's a reason for me sharing it so as my family was watching it I actually started to black out I actually they almost fainted I started to go all woozy and the world blacked out around me and I started to say mom mum I'm fainting I'm fainting and my my family did not relate what was happening with me to the scene on the TV their attention immediately turned to me they they did not even see the Association so they turned to me and they were like oh my gosh oh my gosh and so they grabbed me a glass of water and even put a little bit a sugar cube in my mouth because they thought maybe my blood sugar was low and I was fine after 10 minutes and then my mom took me to the doctor the next day and to check my blood sugar and things like that and I was completely fine now I know that it was because of that scene on TV I know that it was literally like I wore what happened and that to me was my first clue at that time that I can't separate other people's emotions and then it happened to me when my best friend had cancer I couldn't separate it I couldn't detach I felt it as if it was happening to me so what I'm saying here is be aware if that's what happens to you and this lady who just wrote in with the question that you just gave me you sound a lot like my husband Danny he would make an amazing nurse or doctor because he was my best caregiver when I was sick he knew what my needs were even before I did and he was prepared with them he knew when I would need a chair because my my muscles had deteriorated and I couldn't walk much he knew exactly what I needed and we got to a point where I trusted him more than I trusted anyone else but he didn't wear it he didn't wear the pain on his own physical body he was able to stay strong throughout my illness I would not be able to do that for someone what he did for me and it sounds like you have the gift of being able to do that because you feel the emotions you know what is needed but you're able to be detached and compartmentalized and that's a beautiful gift to have so thanks for sharing that but he struggles with sadness at times yes how can we support him the best way to support him would be and this is you know and this may sound strange the best way to support him is for all of you around him to be happy because he will absorb your energy you know our kids are like sponges and if you are suffering if you're struggling your kids are going to pick that up and empathic kids or kids who are impacts even more so this is why I tell parents all the time that stop stressing yourself out for your children because that's an oxymoron when you're stressing yourself out in order to give your children everything you're actually stressing them out because you're bringing that stress with you when you're with them so the best thing you can do for the people around you is to be joyful because they want to absorb your joy so do what it takes to find your joy and for your child and in Barbara in your case because he's also an empath as well you need to encourage him to find his joy find his passion really encourage him and make him aware that a lot of the emotions he's picking up are not his they've got nothing to do with him they're not his and then help him to find things that make him happy and even maybe encourage him to make a list of things that make him happy and refer to that list whenever he feels debts sad or down so thanks for that question I'm sure that you helped a lot of people by asking it alright okay so this cup was given to me by my beautiful assistant Rose Brooks and she gave it to me saying this is your Facebook live cup so Thank You rose and yes I love the cup too it's got it's got a beautiful little purple butterfly over there love love it thanks for noticing it okay one last question [Music] bukhan I always wondered as being an empath was a strength or a weakness I've lost myself many times through my life staying besides those beside staying beside those who use me I was working overtime to understand how they became user and trying to save them Wow yes a big an empath is both a strength and a weakness or it can be both so the idea is really to identify the strengths of being an empath but yes we have a tendency to be rescuers and we have a tendency to jump in and rescue people who don't need our help we have a tendency to get stuck and caught up in other people's dramas and we are people who are the first people to be called on when people need help because they know we're not going to say no so be aware of those tendencies they I wouldn't call them weaknesses they just make you who you are but be aware that you need to recharge your batteries and also I want to encourage you to watch my video from last Friday which I think the date was the 1st of March but anyway it was the video from last Friday where I really talked about the tools on how to recharge your batteries and why it's important to recharge your batteries once you've recharge your batteries the next step is to set yourself free set yourself free to be the beautiful person that you are to shine your light as bright as you can and to really bring your joy into the world and because that's that's all everybody wants is to feel your joy and remember you bring yourself with you wherever you go thank you all for tuning in I'd love for you to connect with me I'd love for you to come up and say hey at events I will be out in fact I'm going to be on a cruise next week love to see some of you if you're able to join me I'm going to be in Europe and in in May so please join me sorry Europe and Bristol in the UK so please join me I'll be travelling in speaking in 7 cities on my European tour would love to see you all and join me again for Facebook I'm gonna try and squeeze one more in before I go on the cruise I'm going to try and continue to do them on the cruise but you know Wi-Fi can be and and data can be a little bit spotty on a cruise when you're out in the middle of the ocean but I am gonna try and connect with you and to keep you plugged in on what I'm up to so love you all and I'll see you all real soon bye

Channel: Anita Moorjani Official YouTube Channel

Views: 69,897

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Id: xaWfx_rU5mU

Length: 35min 45sec (2145 seconds)

Published: Thu Mar 29 2018