r/StoriesAboutKevin - Kevin puts his MOBILE in WATER...

what's up guys welcome to daily dose of reddit this is your host zach in today's subreddit stories about kevin alright this story is called the kevin's covinas of the railroad i was heavily debating for ages whether to post this or not as i don't know if it's kevin enough or if i could leave out enough hints about my real location also on mobile so sorry for any formatting issues my place of work is the railroad among us we have a lot of kevins the one kevin who lies on timesheets and denies it the other kevin who can't remember his own shift from one day to the next i could go on for ages at the large amount of stupidity i see but the one kevin and covina yes this story has two that i want to talk about i work with directly and let's just say i really hope they grow brain soon this story takes place in early 2020. i'm working my train as usual when i hear over the portable radio that there is a report of smoke and it might be a small fire i'm thinking already why are you calling us about a small fire we travel another mile and i feel the engineer hit the brakes hard i run up to his cab and that small fire is shooting 45 foot tall flames near an overpass there is almost no way we can go any further but he did stop about 400 feet short of the passenger station nearby after determining we could safely move to that station we proceeded to sit at said station for over an hour waiting for someone to tell us what to do keep in mind it was still winter and the temperature was about 35 degrees fahrenheit so not awful but not something you want to stand in a long time oh and it was night so no sunlight for warmth about 30 minutes go by of us sitting at this station and enter kevin my supervisor this has the audacity to ask us why we haven't moved yet we point out the very obvious fire nearby and his response that's irrelevant you're supposed to be at crew yard why are you still here we again tell him about the fire but he's not having it so he calls the dispatcher covina since i was going back and forth between the platform and the train to try to keep warm i didn't hear everything but from what i gathered covina told us to go back to crew yard and stand by kevin tries to tell her we are still at station and never left no one else but me happened to notice that we were never told via radio what we had to do they told the other four train stuck in the mess what to do but never told us the more i type this out the less it feels like a kevin story in just incompetence but i'll finish it quickly here and let you be the judge we eventually got orders an hour later and went back to our crew yard after kevin and covina stopped arguing we learned the next day the fire was arson and the perp was arrested i don't think this is a kevin story but i'll let you guys decide that now i'm not gonna lie i have very little clue as to what happened here but i'll just say this freaking kevin's gonna kill us all boom all right this story's called kevin doesn't understand new technology the last time i posted here i told you of my boss kevin he wanted us to go through a bad fire to get back to our rail base okay so that's what happened i guess i kind of zoned out during the last story today i have another story for you with this same kevin today's topic iphones on mobile so sorry for format as a reminder i work on the railroad and this kevin is my direct supervisor we are one of the last railroads to use paper for everything think 1980s yes we are that behind someone higher up in management finally decided to take us to the 21st century we've been getting waves of new tech over several weeks yes in the middle of a pandemic somehow we are getting new tech i can't talk about most of it though one of the new things we are getting is new iphones which are supposed to replace everything we've been using paper for except they don't work anything and everything we are supposed to be able to do with these phones don't work kevin my boss is supposed to be our troubleshoot expert except he's not his ideas for fixing our issues make it worse or non-functional i've seen three iphones replaced already because my co-workers some of who are also kevin's followed his advice problem one phone won't turn on kevin's solution throw it in water for 30 minutes should work fine spoiler totally didn't problem two x app doesn't work right kevin's response i don't know call expert at x number expert doesn't know either and advises getting a new phone three my problem phone turns off without warning whether i'm doing something or not kevin proceeds to take my phone from me plug it into something don't know why he didn't do that before and proceeds to delete everything on the phone hands it back to me and tells me it should work fine now i told him no it won't as you deleted everything and now it is useless he tells me i'm exaggerating and to just try it so i do surprise surprise the phone no longer works kevin says ha well don't know how that happened best you leave it with me while i try to fix it again i'm sorry if this was hard to follow but kevin is a nightmare to deal with and before anyone asks yes we've had modern computers in the company for a long time i was referring to specific job functions that would make my job easier if i didn't have to write it down all the time this guy said put your phone in water to fix a problem what alright this story's called kevin and the radio greetings everyone today i have what i think is a treat this is a story that has been stewing for almost a year though it's probably going to be a very short story the more i think about let's get started as i'm sure it's been known by now if you've read my previous posts i work on the railroad throughout the railroad there are a lot of kevin's i have to deal with on a daily basis the worst of them so far has to be my boss kevin i mean former boss he has been booted from my current location and is now in and out of the way area that takes 90 minutes to get to on a good day that hasn't stopped him from throwing one more nightmare from i am required by railroad law to have a radio on my person whenever i'm on duty not having one is a very bad thing and is punishable by suspension i thankfully procured one within my first year they told us when we started that radios were hard to come by for beaver sausage reasons what i wasn't told however was the radio i was given is a very very old radio think radios that were considered new in the late 80s yes that old learning this after the fact made it make more sense to me why mine suddenly stopped working after just nine months i have eight years experience working on the railroad and the first radio was replaced with another one just as old as the first one the individual who issued me the second radio told me it was recently repaired and should work fine for a while translation five years fast forward to last november when the radio died again kevin my boss was stationed at my post and giving him the radio quickly turned into my biggest and longest fight ever every other week i would be hounding this butthole asking over and over again if he got my radio taken care of each time he would give me a different excuse he pulled out of his butt for six months this kept going yes even when the pandemic hit he was still going to try to deal with the radio i'd switch shifts where i didn't need to see him as often but that was not much better as when i was fighting with kevin about a radio he should have taken care of within a week i was also fighting with other supervisors when they would ask me where my radio was every time they were ready to suspend me until i told them who had it i got very used to the familiar annoyed sigh by nearly every higher up in management all of this came to a head last month first week into september after labor day i just returned to work after being out for three weeks not because management took me out but because i injured my back pretty badly at work i'm okay now for anyone who is going to ask my first day back i get to work and immediately get sent to my supervisor's office inside that office was kevin but also the ceo of the company i had never met this man and the first thing i find myself thinking is what the heck did i do to warrant ceo to be here the following conversation ensued here's the cast kevin op ceo good morning op sit down we have much to discuss make this quick i have be quiet kevin you have a lot of explaining to do is this gonna take long i have a train to get very soon you'll be in and out quickly i promise why have you been without a radio since november i point to kevin you should be asking him that i've been hounding him for months about getting the damn thing and all i get is excuses don't make applies op you know full well i'm too busy i am not starting this beaver sausage with you again don't you dare talk to your boss like that on the contrary kevin you are a dumbass with no sense of urgency let him speak i proceed to explain for the thousandth time why i have been without a radio for months on end and why kevin refused to take care of it when the ceo asked him to explain himself he stuttered to come up with the reason then he drops this bombshell why are you whining like a child about this anyway it's not like you do your job in the first place i was pissed i was ready to start screaming at kevin about my work ethic but the ceo saw my rage and asked me to step outside what followed was about 15 minutes of screaming before the ceo poked his head out and told me to get to my train we'll finish this later six hours later i returned for my run to find kevin's car gone and his office locked i find a note from the ceo addressed to me with his number i called him and was told basically the ceo took my radio from kevin and told him to go home at once he's gonna take care of the radio himself and will get back to me by the end of the week with the result yes the shop was open during the pandemic so there wasn't a delay he also told me not to worry about kevin's remark about my work ethic three days later the ceo called me and told me the radio was unfixable so as an apology for dealing with kevin's stupidity i got a brand new radio kevin was moved to a position that takes him two hours to get to and from work and was told by ceo if he doesn't get his act together he won't have a job anymore i no longer care i have a new radio and don't have to worry about kevin anymore that's the kind of ending we want to see upper management showing mid-level management who's boss and new radios it's like oprah alright this story's called when kevin got an x-acto knife this is a story one of my favorite teachers told us in high school i didn't get to see this firsthand just heard the story many times and thought you might like it here it goes sorry for bad grammar so my teacher taught an engineering-ish class called sita one year she had a student who we will call kevin no idea his actual name who is only in the class because year one is super easy and he just wanted to be lazy all day he would routinely do really stupid things such as almost touching a bandsaw blade in motion on a dare teacher stopped that pretty quickly and banned him from power tools but that's not the focus of this story after a few months kevin has a crush on a girl in the class who we'll call alexa not her real name kevin wanted to impress her and for some reason thought that making a paper airplane would do it he made a crappy design and tried to get it to fly needless to say it didn't go very far in his genius he realized that it was tail heavy and needed some weight in the front while the teacher was helping another student kevin decided to use an x-acto knife to weigh the front down the blade of the knife was facing forward essentially making an excessive dart armed with his new weighted airplane he threw it right at alexa and had written i love you on it unfortunately for alexa dollar store cupid was pretty accurate and the blade got stuck next to her left eye she had to get the blade surgically removed and has to wear glasses for the rest of her life she ended up getting a restraining order on kevin the story doesn't end there as kevin realized right as the blade stuck that he was in serious trouble the classroom they were in had a door leading outside and he bolted kevin decided to hide in a tree in the woods on the school grounds while he was a fast climber he had one big mistake wearing his orange sweatshirt while in a light forest in the middle of winter didn't take him very long to get hot but the story doesn't end there either amazingly kevin was suspended for two weeks with possible expulsion and was stuck in his house about a week in and kevin was done with the food at home he decided he wanted doritos and knew of a nearby convenience store having no money he decided to look in his dad's room and ended up finding his handgun armed with the same amounts of brain as the prior week he set out to the store kevin stole two bags of doritos while holding the cashier semi at gunpoint he grabbed the tasty tortilla chip treats and went home only one problem he had worn the same bright orange sweatshirt as before he got sentenced to a few years in jail as well as a hefty fine and a few other things i forgot so that's the story of kevin hope whoever read enjoy let me know if i need to clarify it okay i don't know how old to think this person is because if they're if they're a high schooler who ah i don't know what's worse like a kid robbing a store at gunpoint or a high schooler freaking throwing an x-acto knife in some girl's eye alright this story's called kavina doesn't know why her medicine doesn't work this one is short and sweet i was a pharmacy tech for five years at the three-letter chain cbs one day a patient calls after confirming her details name and date of birth the following interaction happens why isn't my medication working are you taking it as directed no please hold for the pharmacist sounds about right but it sounds like one of those situations where it's like they kind of expect you to say something else and so they answer having thought you said something different to what you actually did say and they're left with embarrassment don't forget to like subscribe and hit that bell to never miss an episode [Music] you

Channel: Daily Dose Of Reddit

Views: 4,539

Keywords: reddit, r/, subreddit, best of reddit, r/ top posts, top posts, top posts of all time, reddit top posts, 100% True stories, reddit true stories, top all time, reddit posts, reddit funny, daily dose of reddit, daily dose of internet, daily dose of memes

Id: ENqj9m2FybI

Length: 15min 58sec (958 seconds)

Published: Mon Mar 21 2022