r/AmITheA--Hole My Brother Hit On My Wife!

welcome to our slash am i the butthole where opie's brother tries to hit on his wife am i the butthole for calling my brother a disgusting gross man at his daughter's birthday party my brother paul and i aren't close at all we have very different world views and have incompatible personalities i can tolerate him but i would never consider him a friend he's been married to lisa for one or two years now and they have a beautiful daughter together my girlfriend amy and i were invited to celebrate my niece's first birthday most of the family was invited and it would be the first time that i would have seen them all together in years amy and i arrived a little bit earlier than we were supposed to and instead of waiting in the car we decided to go in the first thing i noticed was how calm my brother seemed to be in contrast to lisa who was frantically running up and down when my brother saw amy he immediately handed the baby over to her and got a beer and sat down to watch tv lisa was clearly struggling but paul was content with beer and netflix i don't want to be rude and maybe this was a one time thing but it bothered me how uninvolved he was he handed amy a baby with a full diaper and vomit on its clothes eventually amy lisa and i finished getting ready the house was clean the food was ready and lisa looked ready to host a big gathering we all paid zero attention to paul when my family arrived i thought everything was going well i avoided paul and i enjoyed speaking to my family after we sat down to eat paul approached me drunk thanking me for helping lisa i didn't want to be around him for long and moved out of his way he was very persistent i was ignoring him but he started talking about amy he told me protect amy like a real man or you've got a great woman by your side you know what whatever it was slightly odd and mildly uncomfortable but i was able to brush it off amy was trying to sober him up a little bit before the cake cutting so she was selectively hearing we tried to get him to stop talking and drink water however he had a lot to say about lisa he was complaining about how pregnancy ruined lisa's body and how a baby ruined his life amy and i kept looking at each other awkwardly we couldn't leave this conversation soon enough he was complaining about his love life or lack thereof and commenting about how he desperately wanted to passionately hug with someone fit like amy this made both of us extremely uncomfortable amy left quickly apologizing to lisa i told him that he was a disgusting gross man who needs some effing help before i left apparently this made him super upset and he started crying at the party paul told everyone that the reason that he was crying was because of what i said to him he got over it quickly but a few people told me that i was wrong to shame a father on his child's birthday i could have probably left without making a statement am i the butthole shaming a father on his child's birthday okay what behavior here is indicative of a father how is this guy acting like a father by getting drunk at his kid's birthday by ignoring his wife by disrespecting his child by saying that the child ruined his life by disrespecting his wife by saying that his wife's body is ruined by disrespecting his entire family and your family by saying he wants to sleep with your girlfriend opie oh my god opie you gave him exactly the amount of respect that he deserves as a father like when i started reading this story i was trying to figure out huh i wonder why he has such a strained relationship with his brother like what's the deal there do they have history did they date the same girl in high school or something but i'm getting a pretty good sense your brother's just a douchebag he's a whiny entitled disrespectful borderline cheating douchebag op you get zero out of five buttholes paul gets 3.5 out of five buttholes am i the butthole for laughing at my neighbor and calling them stupid before closing the door on them i'm a 25 year old guy and i live in my family's cottage which i was given ownership of the cottage itself is a waterfront property facing a medium-sized lake my family's been living here for generations as my great-grandfather originally bought it before passing it down and eventually i got it my neighbors are a different story because many of the people that i've known since childhood have moved out the houses that my neighbors once had have been torn down and replaced with designer style homes with the construction of these homes came new neighbors and an hoa of which i am not a member my problem started with my next door neighbor sophie a 55 year old woman overfishing one day after doing some canoe fishing i was approached by sophie on my beach she asked if it was legal to fish on the lake and i said it was as long as you paid the 25 per year license fee after that i said that i had to go because i'd caught some fish and i wanted to start processing them for dinner because it was getting late after our conversation i didn't hear from her for over two weeks my next encounter with sophie wasn't in person but instead threw a letter in the letter she wrote about how dangerous fishing is to the environment and why i should stop in response i chose to simply chuck it in my recycling bin and ignore her because it wasn't worth my time my most recent encounter with sophie was two days ago when i had some friends over it was in the afternoon i was running back to my house along with one of my friends to grab some more beers while grabbing the drinks we heard a knock at the door when i answered the door it was sophie and she had another letter before handing me the letter she said that she tried to be diplomatic and now she's had enough and has a letter from the hoa admittedly i was a bit tipsy at the time and in response i laughed and called her stupid for believing the hoa could do anything before closing the door on her after sobering up i feel conflicted on the one hand i feel that i was justified in my actions because my fishing is none of her business on the other hand i feel that i could have dealt with her in a more tactful way am i the butthole op you are not the butthole here and i sincerely look forward to hearing more stories about your care and neighbor how exactly is one guy fishing by himself bad for the environment anyways you get zero out of five buttholes your neighbor karen gets one out of five buttholes am i the butthole for banning my husband from visiting my sister with me because he won't stop trying to debate her and her husband my sister marie who's 29 and her husband zack who's 40 had their first child a beautiful baby girl two months ago they've been pretty nervous parents so when my husband tom who's 42 and i who's 37 were invited to finally meet our niece i was thrilled except i was worried about tom making a fool of himself you see my husband tom and my sister marie have always had a hard time getting along because they don't agree on nearly anything and tom has always gotten a kick out of challenging marie on their differing views because they're both very opinionated the thing is tom thinks it's funny to watch marie react when he says things to provoke her and marie always wants to prove that his views are wrong according to tom because marie was in grad school for social sciences and is knowledgeable about the topics that tom wants to argue about marie shouldn't have a problem with debating him because it's literally her job in the past both tom and marie have initiated these arguments and they've both been guilty of taking it too far in the past but ever since marie has gotten pregnant and had a baby she's calmed down a lot whereas tom still tries to bait her into debates about touchy subjects mainly about politics and personal values this has gotten to a point where marie has blocked him on all social media a few months ago before we went to visit i asked tom to just be nice to marie and zack and not start anything tom said that he would try his best i told him that i would be very upset with him if he tried to bait marie or zack into an argument tom started out the evening pretty strong and kept to himself until it was revealed that zach was going to be the one to stay home with her daughter tom made a comment like oh i thought the mom was supposed to do that zack said that it was pretty sexist for my husband to say that and when tom asked how zach told him that moms can have careers too and that marie shouldn't just give up on all the hard work that she just did tom started on a tangent and marie cut him off and told him to either quit or leave because she's done entertaining his nonsense tom laughed it off but it was still very awkward after this we didn't stay for long after that and when we got home i told tom that i was done with him embarrassing me and that he's not allowed to join me whenever i visit maria again if i'm even invited back i told him that it doesn't make him look smart when he always insists on having these conversations that it just makes him look like a douche and me look like a fool tom said that i'm blowing this way out of proportion and that it's not his fault that they get so offended and that if anything they were rude to kick him out over his opinion but marie didn't do anything to him this time she didn't snap back at him she didn't call him names she just asked him to stop am i the butthole am i being unreasonable alright i hope this doesn't piss people off in the comments but when i started reading this i was thinking to myself um this sounds like the classic liberal family members can't get along with conservative family members and i was trying to figure out like which side was liberal and which side was conservative or if i just misread the situation but as soon as op's husband said oh i thought the mom was supposed to do that i'm like ah-ha i was a hundred percent correct marie and her husband are liberal and opie and her husband are conservative and you know i'm not trying to say that one group is right or wrong i'm not trying to make this a political argument but this is just like a tale as old as time and like you know that you know the stereotype of the like racist douchebag uncle who always ruins thanksgiving with his extremist opinions that's what opie's husband is gonna be like to marie's daughter okay so anyways op your husband's being a douchebag the fact that he has to argue like he literally can't stop disrespecting other people's lives it's honestly kind of like the behavior you'd expect from like a 16 year old you know the smug smarmy 16 year old who thinks they know everything about the world and they just have to share their opinions but this guy's like what he's 42 come on man just let other people live their lives who cares who stays home if he's gonna come into other people's homes and then disrespect the way they choose to live their lives then he can't be surprised when they kick him out and it's not your sister who's blowing things out of proportion op it's your husband he's the one who can't let things go op you and your sister get zero out of five buttholes your husband gets two out of five buttholes am i the butthole for telling my daughter that she can live with me under one condition i'm a 34 year old man and 10 years ago i had a daughter nova i was a terrible person back then i didn't stay in her life and i deeply regret it a few months ago i contacted her mom to see if i could see my child she happily agreed to co-parent with me and seemed relieved which was understandable considering she had four other kids all younger than nova nova was a bit distant at first but now we're doing better she's generally a very good kid but something i realized about her is that no punishment seems to work on her and also she can be very disrespectful at times if i tell her to do something as punishment she won't do it or if i ground her she'll just leave without my permission i asked her mom how she punishes her and she said that she's never punished nova before based on what i've heard from nova it seems like her mom would just cuss her out and yell at her which i don't think is a good punishment for a kid two nights ago nova asked me if she could live with me from now on i told her i'd love that but she can only live with me under one condition she has to follow my rules and be respectful she didn't say anything after that after she went back to her mom's home my mom who was there when nova asked me this told me that i was a butthole because if a kid is asking her did beat dad to take her in there must be something very wrong so you can't make conditions for her you just say yes and you take her in was i really wrong to have this condition i can't be a parent if she doesn't listen to me but now my mom and my daughter refuse to talk to me yeah op you're right you're a major major butthole here it is not a ten-year-old girl's responsibility to earn the right to live with her father right she's ten dude she's ten a father's loved his daughter shouldn't be conditional on good behavior it should be unconditional because that's what parents are supposed to do love their kids unconditionally and like the fact that she's not responding well to punishments is because neither you nor her mother are actually disciplining her so like who's surprised that she's not responding to punishment i'm not surprised op it's time to stop making excuses and start actually raising your daughter i'm giving your daughter 0 out of 5 buttholes and i'm giving you 3.5 out of 5 buttholes am i the butthole for not wanting to see my dad's affair baby nope next story am i the butthole for leaving the restaurant after my boyfriend refused to pay for my meal i'd lent my boyfriend some money a few weeks ago because of something he needed and he promised to pay me back asap he was supposed to pay me back five days ago but something came up and he didn't i tried to be patient yesterday we'd planned to go out with some friends at night for dinner however as i came back from work i was robbed on the bus and i had all my money and cards stolen i cancelled my cards on the phone but the bank customer service person told me that my new cards wouldn't be available until later and the banks were closed that afternoon so i had no money when i went to dinner with my boyfriend and friends i asked my boyfriend to pay me back the money he owes me or at least pay for my meal since i have no money he didn't exactly say yes or no just a simple don't worry as we ordered he only ordered for himself and told me that he can't cover for mine at the moment so i better not order anything and just have some bites from his meal instead i was so mad and frustrated because he had promised to give me back the money he then claimed that something came up and couldn't pay me back but then ordered a nice meal for himself and just told me to get his scraps because he wouldn't pay me back or at least for my meal if i'd stayed i'd be the only one sitting there with no meal in front of me i said that this is ridiculous and i got up and left our friends told me that it was very low of me to get up and leave and how i should just be polite and stay there i can't quite understand that logic but is there any way that i'm the butthole alright down in the comments people are asking opie if she told everyone else at the table whether or not she got robbed and op clarifies yeah it's pretty much the very first thing that she said when she sat down so like what i can't understand is how is it possible that literally none of your friends including your boyfriend offered to buy you a meal and even if we give your boyfriend the extreme benefit of the doubt let's suppose your boyfriend only has 20 to his name so he really can't pay you back because he just doesn't have the money in that case he shouldn't order his own meal he should order a meal and split it with you or just you know suffer and buy you a meal because you just got robbed but instead he's like oh well tough luck sweetheart anyways i'll have the burger with fries please opie i think you might need to reevaluate your relationship with your friends and your boyfriend because this is not the way that i would treat one of my friends if they got robbed on the way to see me op i'm giving you 0 out of 5 buttholes i'm giving everyone else in this story 1.5 out of 5 buttholes that was our slash amy the butthole and if you like this content check out my podcast where i publish the exact same episodes also hit that subscribe button because i put out new reddit videos every single day

Channel: rSlash

Views: 383,572

Keywords: reddit, r/, rslash, r\, sub, subreddit, best of reddit, reddit top posts, top posts, top posts of all times, funniest posts, funny, comedy, funniest reddit posts, funny reddit posts, funny reddit, fails, cringe, prorevenge, r/prorevenge, prorevenge posts, prorevenge funny, prorevenge fails, pro revenge, funny pro revenge, amitheasshole, r/amitheasshole, amithebutthole, r/amithebutthole, aita, r/aita

Id: 8VC4li7nnRs

Length: 16min 10sec (970 seconds)

Published: Thu Sep 01 2022