Ralfi's Alley - Sh*ts and Giggles 50

so i'm on final approach at 500 knots that's okay right apparently you have a parachute in the f-18 according to independence day [Music] [Laughter] so just pull your shoe where is that button in the cockpit i wonder [Music] [Music] [Music] i think he did a pretty good job here this is pretty funny oh no no [Laughter] [Music] god i just killed some people [Music] okay i'll try to land you on a tower no no no no no no no no no no no no no i'm not a bad pilot dog okay just no let's just parachute let's just take it easy it's the worst customer service i've ever seen yikes yikes oh it's a lot of damage [Music] all right give me one second because i gotta turn you all [ __ ] down this goddamn dak is loud as all [ __ ] hell yo just you know really [ __ ] loud someone yell please do not literally it's piercing my [ __ ] ears right now wow god damn all right three to one go block zone [Laughter] [Music] yeah got to account for the combo lag i see the vehicle yeah just act next [Music] see the problem solved itself one thing i found pretty interesting is that the rio and the pilots share uh rid of the skin i thought you were going to save women i need two scav kills i should get that in interchange pretty easily unless i die within the first 30 seconds of spawning in because welcome to tarkov but i'm on [Music] oh i see you what the [ __ ] what is going on oh dude i know it all over the place what's the [ __ ] what is going on i don't know if i'm gonna stop no no no no no no [Laughter] it was like oshkosh [ __ ] air show all at once what happened there then tell me the teeth how he falls maybe we'll actually what the hell did i get i just [Music] what did you do i didn't see him i just wanted to oh god second wreck is that a second wreck oh that looks like a second wreck to me [Music] the fighter pilot gods they are angry jay magic are you flying formation with that frog foot uh negative he should be dead all right i'm still tracking him direct left you guys are flying information oh all right thank you fox too okay we'll go to somewhere hold the [ __ ] on why was that f-18 just taking triple a fire from there am i high right now that's a friendly one no no wow come on just no [Music] oh by myself i don't wanna be i forgot about this the [ __ ] is shooting at you they they [ __ ] spawned uh ground units right next to our base so i'm gonna land two two geez are you trying to get the dsr get from [ __ ] out all that flying for me the [ __ ] oh my [ __ ] this oh i'm done i'm fine no more i'm done [ __ ] this should i ask don't [ __ ] what you [ __ ] neck i swear to god you [ __ ] ask him to [ __ ] your mouth i don't want to talk about it he didn't even bring any weapons that's not it he ran out of fuel nope you should see it you're landing right now i don't know i don't see oh there's the fire clouds aren't even [ __ ] moving oh no they're a pet named pet nathan yeah pat matt painted they're [Music] god [Laughter] [Music] uh all right all right guys uh i do need to push extraction sorry about that but uh god you suck i have to go to work early today because i can't use the bike get a real job trying but no one's hiring [Music] bonus there's another guy inside this car and he's dying slowly [Music] oh he's got the rocket launcher to your mama's aho airlines i mean this is a little overkill but i think what we're gonna do is [Laughter] oh boy here i go killing again no that's a lot of damage i still remember my [ __ ] father giving me a cigarette when i was a [ __ ] toddler i was like four years old my mom did that but not at four a little bit older because i was curious about cigarettes she's like oh you're curious really here have a smoke have another and she what she was expecting for videos go oh that's icky i'll never touch the stuff again unfortunately what i said was this is cool and she's like oh [ __ ] it's kind of backfired so you can come in [Music] what [Music] [Music] [Applause] just punch it's okay no it's okay i've only heard of the failures i've not heard of any action and no we should not are you left right wherever this is going [Music] don't oh man i had a really good thought [Music] i felt that i coming don't worry it's just a hair you're flying right over my takeoff path don't worry that's just an f-15 dragging its ass across the ground don't worry those are just stands flying over your shoulder don't worry that's just an f-18 doing an air show right as you take off everything's fine welcome to dcs oh [ __ ] [ __ ] [ __ ] ah [ __ ] i just spilled all my alcohol oh god i just spilled everything on my [ __ ] desk oh god [ __ ] well he was flying the f-14 and raised his gear too soon he had to restart then he went into the [ __ ] mirage and spilled alcohol all over his keyboard he's not having a good day him everywhere god [Laughter] i was like are those birds in the background [Laughter] never take fuel bud in the i-10 never hey someone else uses 33 fm now we need to switch no we'll switch off of it i'll let my buddy go uh we don't mind going off it's fine i don't want to step on your cons no no no no it's all good man you you got it you got it you were here god damn bright i was yeah those are mortars i don't know someone tells the grenades oh my god i really i can't walk through this [ __ ] little push me kidding me [Laughter] you know i wonder if i can collapse the gear while i'm on the ground is there a ground safety for the they're [Laughter] that is a negative well well i just came back from the bathroom and i found myself in a shitty situation i opened up my [ __ ] throne and i found that there was [ __ ] where there shouldn't be any [ __ ] i figured that i had a fart at the same time that i had a [ __ ] and i think it just [ __ ] fragmented areas it wasn't supposed to it's gonna [Music] [ __ ] multiples snap snap snap yeah okay defeated one blacked out sorry mate the other guy popped upstairs wait i mean how do you know who he's talking about you don't sports shut up i know a thing or two what's a hoop huh [Music] are you kidding me what just happened don't slow down too much [Music] dude is right on your six fifty fourteen twenty thirty retired time [Laughter] god what the [ __ ] oh my god that would be why the big took off kind of funny just go make my chicken cutlet damn it flower spider spider right the t fighter by the way that text that jake sent you disregard that [ __ ] we don't need any more puppies in this house i swear to god if you come home with that thing i will put you on the street [Laughter] yes did you ever hear the zoom in booms yes that's coming up nice cult your asses are worse than mine stop i'm surprised that mike picks that up to be honest the doctor dentist drill it's actually pretty horrible yeah brings back my ptsd duly noted it's fun as [ __ ] oh oh jesus christ what the [ __ ] was that i was paying attention to flight lead oh [Music] look at that you son of a [ __ ] i just felt something crawl on my foot another cockroach anti-34 declaring an emergency no one needs comcast cam sweetie we got to go to camcast today she walked like i want to get my nails done over can cast maybe afterwards we go shopping you do that way too good wait no thread the needle thread the needle throughout the needle [Music] [Music] when i was in a store i was dating this one chick we went to like just regular grocery store this guy comes up from behind me said yo yo yo yo you want some weed i'm like no no thank you i'm good it's like oh you that white boy you and that hardcore [ __ ] you want some cocaine like no no no no no no no i'm okay thank you just got an awax called bra 088 for 110 at 110 000. what is it uh the endeavor columbia no i specifically didn't say that one for a reason that'd be just lots of little aoc schools wow god i'm white i'm black i'm yellow i'm red i'm lost i don't know that was his residue radar but how the [ __ ] did they get this close this patriots are pretty [ __ ] useless it is take a look we're right there how the [ __ ] did they not see a banner right here [Music] look look at the goddamn sams what the [ __ ] 29 over our airfield the most useless [ __ ] patriot missile sights [Music] [Applause] you want to cross your muzzle what's your fire what's your fire crossing i literally just said what's your [ __ ] fire check air brake brakes are fine oh there we go their brakes are fine [Music] don't we use noise pneumatic brakes you mean pneumatic brakes like my pistol that has a large scope on that's a pistol that's visible that is an anti-aircraft weapon wow uh can you make it back home do you think all right it's pretty controllable find a bump [Music] there you go oh don't roll i'm using rudder right now can you deploy the [ __ ] parachute i don't oh yeah which one is that one right nope oh that's it guys i'm good good jesus uh don't press f2 before you despawn just check the situation of your aircraft if you haven't how is it still flying i don't know but that's great all right all right listen all you [ __ ] those goddamn capitalist pigs are trying to come into our territory once again goddamn resources [Music] [Applause] i've actually changed my name to my lord so when gci talks to me they call me my lord every time [Laughter] six o'clock this one can't but with hopes and dreams we can that's true we just have to hope hard enough which is different from hoping hard i know what you were thinking shut up sploosh explosion isn't that what women say when they get horny [Music] splash i wish i could do kermit the frog hey um do you know which way is in town back the way you came [Laughter] bombs didn't come off the rails that was way too close for comfort let's not do that again please gotta get my cushion out of my ass cheeks [Music] [ __ ] i'm about to fly yeah past you i'm your seven o'clock right now and i'm gonna fly right over the airfield and i'll dump the flares okay passing over the top of you now right in front of you off your nose and flares are right here this is the runway i see it kind of [ __ ] it's dark where the [ __ ] are the lights i just deployed lights tell you what if i land with my nose wheel uh lights on you might see the runway better how about them apples so i'm going to go to the end of the runway and i'll turn around and i'll pretend to be those taxi lights oh wonderful hold on let me do the same thing i can't see in front of me [Laughter] left eleven more left left not quite uh well i don't have fuel for this [ __ ] okay well i'm on two three left i have the lights on you're just holding right here right right turn do a right turn right here i'm like moving my nose where to should be moving the light we are the rabbits jesus christ the landing light on that thing is my landing lioness is just a taxi light well it's 2 000 and gaining there's no way you're not seeing this i'm gonna say how dark it is got eyes on the lights oh he's got lights okay there you go that's the beginning of the runway that's me wiggling the nose wheel for you so just make a pattern now that you have visual on me there's no way he's making that landing pocket you don't you don't have to purchase it right now look at that [Music] you

Channel: ralfidude

Views: 116,319

Keywords: ralfidude, ralfi's, alley, dcs, fc3, digital, combat, simulation, flaming, cliffs, battlefield, bf, flight, sim, f-15c, eagle, f-16, viper, squad, amra 2, arma 3, KOTH, COD, mig, sukhoi, POV, A-10, a10, sh*ts and giggles, sh*ts and giggles 50, SnG, SnG 50

Id: HL7-IyfnHgc

Length: 23min 39sec (1419 seconds)

Published: Wed Jul 31 2019

Reddit Comments

[u/921ninja]

Wow. I remember the first shits and giggles 😭