Raising Our Children As Blind Parents | My Perfect Family | Real Families

[Music] there's a way to make an entrance my destiny it was now a conspiracy of witches download today our hope is that our children will see that we as their parents can achieve and reach goals even without our sight we are a beautiful blended family and we want to show our world from our perspective we're all growing up together and that's what makes it so wonderful [Music] thank you [Music] we have somewhat of a system where we all know our roles the kids work with us beautifully because we've implemented that from day one [Music] above slowly come to realise that our asking for assistance was their beautifully fully sided eyes it's not very much to ask especially when they're just telling us if the mess is clean or not if babies fingerprints are spread throughout the house no no jumping no jumping so as they grow and we grow we're learning how to communicate better which is good for them because they can then better understand what we're trying to achieve okay ready is it time to clean up now guys maybe yeah maybe maybe time to get warm in my business really and when i'm warm i'll i will well see that's one thing about lockdown i don't like it induces idleness no i i lost my sight at the age of one through meningitis and hydrocephalus you know what i think dancing around cleaning up it might warm you up because it was mixed with hydrosyphilis i had high temperatures and a slow buildup of fluid on my optic nerve which then over time built pressure and slowly began to squash the optic nerve what kind of dinosaur is this dinosaur a spinosaurus once this was discovered on a family holiday in australia it was quickly decided that i needed a shunt put in to drain the fluid so we're trying to clean up though you can see i hope where the shunt is right here and it's no longer active so my brain's good now but that is what saved my life what is that is it did my we're firm believers of everything that they have is a privilege not a right a lot of people say we're a bit harsh and strict on our babies but i don't call it that i call it reality show me them though i need to see if they need urgent attending to all right that's actually not too bad alright show me your time [Music] my eye conditions are nystagmus which creates a bit of a shaky movement within the eyes i have stationary night blindness which makes navigating through the dark very hard without a cane and i have congenital cataracts which [Applause] interfere with dark to light and things of that nature so this glare from the sun is very troubling my condition does come from my mother's side of the family it's probably three or four generations in so with the boys i see it as a real blessing or a sense of breaking the curse per se peter did you see mommy's brush do you know where you lift it on the ground okay thank you so whatever you could see from 60 meters i would have to stand approximately 1.5 meters that's just to give you an idea of distance everything i read is large print or braille jamaica [Music] i don't have a good perception of colors but luckily the kids all know their colors i do still heavily rely on the little side that i do have with that comes things like regular migraines just a general tired feeling that even friends of ours that are also visually impaired don't go through so although it is based on memory i'm still relying on the little sight i do have very strongly [Music] quite often it comes to the morning where i'm helping the kids get ready for school and we are all helping sam find things i keep reminding you get your stuff ready the night before so that our morning's way easier [Music] wow and saying that yeah the morning comes and we're running around looking for canes and laptops and things that she needs there's usually three or four of us at a time looking for the one thing what one different thing each yeah or that jay yeah ents's card was on the fridge and it's gone i haven't i don't know where is it and sometimes peter hides my shoes because he doesn't want me to leave all my cane so we might need to look in some very strange places i found the cell phone in the rubbish bin [Music] can i borrow your eyes temporarily can you help me find my cane please it's hard to help them all the time to help find things and to help them walk to walk to other places here look up top is it up top anymore longer [Music] joseph i had asked him to please take some rubbish to the rubbish bin he walked into the kitchen threw it at the wall and came back and thought i wouldn't notice i heard him throw the rubbish at the wall and asked him what he did with it oh i think he him he's tried to tell me he put in the rubbish but i'm very good at seeing around corners who was in charge of getting the washing out of the bathroom they didn't do it all they used to think i was so super mama that my eyes were floating in the air that they couldn't see them and they were following them around so they try what is this paper why is it on the floor but there's always a way that they get caught it surely isn't nothing what does it say we help them by cleaning our room she inspects and looks on the floor really it's blank paper they know their way around the house it's easy they come and they come in here most of the time they talk to us ow here can you find somewhere for it to belong please somewhere you know with other bits of paper not just somewhere random hello [Music] baby where's your wallet you might have accidentally just not realized you put it away so what we have here guys our vision is self-explanatory as an obstacle yeah so you have your papers here you have your stickers over here there wasn't too much worry per se only because we had other visually impaired friends who had already had children and a couple of them have less sight than i do and i got to witness their parenting and the scissors is to be used one at a time all right remember one at a time everyone say it one day all right so pick your paper me sir and my brother go way back it was all music to start off with let's go savvy let's go so we're currently at the studio as a group um try both first try options and then we'll and then we'll tell you which one we like we're working on an original that we wrote sort of at the start of the year so what happens after this going on to the last two courses and finish okay uh so of course is from now on yes crazy you know father um we first met doing show and say [Music] next time we can [Music] about the day we first [Music] um can we um check that again sam okay let's go all right [Music] we're taking music to another level we're trying to express the music to to those who who think they can't do it you know especially to us blindis you know that that thing that they can't do anything that's the whole part of our message [Music] [Applause] anyone want me to cut up some colored paper you just want to use the scissors yeah but what about drawing can you draw a picture yep it's easy to write your name on your name being vision impaired most people think that music is probably the only thing we turn to but there is much more that you know we we have to offer but blind music is is probably harder than the normal music but that's where sam came in what are you putting smaller pieces guys it's easier for me because my wife is sided but but these guys they they rock through it like like it's nothing can you open this one the best thing that sam has within her is how she's very good at working with people and communicating with people so she's always had that within her [Music] since we are a beautiful blended family and because it's us and our babies we want to show our world from our perspective opening up into spaces where we network with other vision impaired parents [Music] or other parents with vision impaired children to advise inspire and learn from their experiences as well [Music] i'd like to work with businesses and organizations who would like to become accessible for parents and families and to do our best to inspire others [Music] we've generally been independent i can't say we've done it all completely on our own but i can at least say 90 to 95 percent the kids have grandparents here which is great not only for them but for us as well i'm just so glad in auckland so i can just come and visit and try and add my little twist to the young ones but um no they're amazing they're amazing they're tipping an egg okay okay yes amazing woman i'm very very proud of her as a dad i've always buried when she was young she couldn't have this when she got to that age i was always worried about it but man she's amazing with her boys son that wasn't frightening at all i knew you were there i hear you sneaking around me this could sing with your family and it's beautiful i miss that as a dad i know that some days all of my friends had their kids when they were a lot older i was your 16 year old dad had a baby and became that statistic that's really unfortunate when it happened we went to australia oh it's always heartbreaking to be honest as it's a young father maybe because everybody blamed me that was my fault that that happened to her that my boy took her to australia for holiday man and i was going through a lot of depression i guess i was more worried about they should never see what my face would look like and because she was so young she had one year of sight and i was always sort of oh selfish sense that she'll never see what i'd look like [Music] so her mother was up first generation [Music] would have been 1991. guangado in that time they had nothing for maori kids in braille so sam was the one that opened the door [Music] every time that they needed things suzanne could be a part of the class they had to be printed uh anything tactile had to be made if they couldn't make it her mother and i would try to do the best we could to get as close as we can to give sam a good picture of what she was playing with once i learned to write in braille the whole world opened up [Music] i am the braille awareness coordinator for blind low vision nz i get to passionately advocate for braille as the primary medium for literacy and numeracy for those with low vision i'm seeing huge development with our accessible formats how they've expanded the collection of te reo maori it just keeps growing [Music] when you hand it to me can you hand it to me facing up and tell me what it is please okay five of spades cute so this is a perkins brailler it is an amazing little machine that has been used since before i was born you finished that one yes okay tell me when you're finished tennis b thank you we have bought a normal pack of playing cards and now we're brailling them to make them accessible for us okay said the first you should do it twice basically a braille cell is made up of six dots those six dots can represent any code or language around the world so right now i'm using the six dots to represent um what am i making at the moment the six of spades correct thank goodness and i also have to write it upside down to braille the cards this way so i'm inverting the browse out and we just write sex in an s for spades that's a standard method of brailling our pack of cards it's super important because in that way we have equity together i can read what they're reading they can read what i'm reading and in that moment we're not so different they don't realize we have a disability at all to them with us mum and dad why do we use braille trophy because it's special do you know why it's special no what does mommy use with braille for because it's helpful for you to know that that you could breathe oh thank you very good watching how she looks after them it's just it's amazing people would freak out what why you thought you thought was playing yeah i know i want to look after your boys just sit there and just watch and i was just saying oh but how she had them organized getting into their routine it was beautiful to see [Music] and also with the technology they had today and man these boys are right into alexa google they're really really onto it i know that's all from her constantly reading they're trying to push them to work a bit harder and she's like that's not yours that's saw you did i saw you said yeah it's all pointless or dad but then singers you grabbed with both hands and you just carried on going and that's that's awesome you ready it's not cheating that's what happens mom do you have a two no but i um what a cheating girl i didn't even know i had a queen [Music] [Music] no the blanket's our picnic blanket tim can you check this in that cupboard behind me over there i think today we're heading cornwall park and i have been asked or to make a picnic ice cream [Music] that's boys uh we have thought of nothing so far so we're completely doing it on the fly just gonna see what we have around we've got all our um containers with the wrong lids because daddy has color confusion so i'm not sure which containers go with which lid but here's mr reliable are you swinging hey jim jim yes pretty helpful guy hey here's kind of the weight think about it carefully um don't make hasty decisions guy i love it it's solid he knows what he's doing and it balances me out because i can be impulsive and make hasty decisions especially if someone asks for help i don't think about myself i just jump into it and then maybe suffer from the consequences that come from that later so that's how he balances me well what flavor are those [Music] rice crackers bella and amaranth made in australia i understood none of that but it sounds healthy thank you [Music] wait for everybody be patient i found a cane man yay oh joey dinosaurs jeffy you cut two dinosaurs in there i am so blind and then so not some can you see the other one yes you're on it yeah really you're both in front of you no no no that's the other one here's it for me i blinded it yeah i blind found one shoe and blind completely missed one thank you darling now where's petey she's very missing petty passionate about things are you gonna be hot in your jersey i reckon she's forever willing to serve everybody whether they're inside or outside of our house remember darling stop at every road whether it's a stranger on the street jimmy i mean to be on petty duty son whether it's her family that means being in front of peter i am high maintenance making sure he doesn't go past you darling remember this is the truth sorry [Music] no his ability to um be able to put up with me it's impressive he's supposed to be allowed to but they will stop at each road very impressive because we don't usually go this way we're going up the mountain [Music] we're going to the cornwall park [Music] we were fully in love like texting um wanted to try and make it something because we were but we were 16 17. our parents told us that it was stupid so we listened basically and waited till we were 21. [Music] [Music] when we decided to become an item it would have been 2011 and we moved in got a place together and piggy rides okay am i too heavy i'm not sure yeah either it's been ages and had our first baby that year in november you gotta go across the road yes please [Music] do cars come this way there's none right now it was beautiful for me to i guess witness jason meeting his baby for the first time after he had so openly accepted my first baby deshaun as a stepson [Music] and committing basically to be one of the father figures in his life for the rest of the time we're together [Music] a little bit little peter do you see how many [Music] as a child teenager and even young adult i had kind of ridden myself off in regards to love i didn't have many partners and things in high school there were things here and there but i had kind of eliminated that and always thought i'd be a single guy so when samantha came along and we formed our relationship and figured out that wow we really like each other and that like turned to love that kind of restored my hope that i had abandoned for so long run run run run run jump oh what beat my darling thanks [Music] our hope is that our children will see that we as their parents who have sight impairment can achieve and reach goals even without our sight stand up whenever they're feeling hard done by or feeling that they can't do this my role is just to remind them that you look at your dad's life and what he is to you guys and i want all that and more for you go on an easier tree for peony you've been blessed with eyes so that you are able to navigate the community or your city more efficiently and to be able to be something great and it's my role to help you get towards that and to achieve those goals you

Channel: Real Families

Views: 9,863

Keywords: Real Families, blind childhood, blind community, blind parenting, blind support network, childhood development, childhood experiences, disability awareness, disabled families, family dynamics, parental guidance, parental responsibilities, parenting struggles, parenting wisdom, positive influences, raising awareness, raising children, raising kids, special needs parenting, supportive community, unconventional families

Id: IFuIPPaRY08

Length: 28min 3sec (1683 seconds)

Published: Tue May 03 2022