The Xbox 360 was the shot in the arm Microsoft’s
gaming division desperately needed. It released a full year before their main
competition at a significantly friendlier price point, and earned the opportunity to
tempt longtime PlayStation players onto the rival platform. That’s not to say they had a rough go of
it with the original Xbox of course. They already had Halo, Fable, Morrowind, and
some wonky but still exclusive wrestling games, but with the 360 it was their time to shine. And shine they did! Leading the PS3 in sales for a good portion
of that generation, and acting as the preferred partner for timed DLC exclusives and the lead
development platform for the vast majority of 3rd party games. Speaking from experience, it wasn’t hugely
fun being a PS3 owner in those early few years, and the white box this controller is connected
to is a big reason why. It wasn’t always great of course [red light
footage], but it seemed every horse in that 2005-2013 race had their overheating stumbles. And so, as we’ve already looked at the PS3’s
launch lineup in detail, and the Xbox Series X is coming ever closer, it’s time to look
through the European launch line up for the Xbox 360. Are you ready? Let’s do it. Amped 3 is without a doubt the most insane
snowboarding game I’ve ever played. Starring a group of young people who could
reasonably be aged anywhere between 16 and 34, you’re immediately dropped into a retro
game of some kind... except, you have to watch and not play. Excuse me, WEINER BOY? WHAT IS HAPPENING. Anyway then you get dumped onto cool dude
mountain to complete a variety of challenges and story missions with your relatable friends
J Dawg, Sebastian, Hunter, and Weinerboy. The tone is extremely irreverent and unique,
and surprisingly meta but one gets the feeling they might have been
trying a bit too hard, with the admittedly fun cutaway cinematics taking a variety of
whacky forms serving as more of a distraction than anything else. The snowboarding itself is quite intuitive
with an ability to chain tricks together tony hawk-style while allowing for a grace period
once you land so you can keep the combo going. It’s silly and fun, but you can’t smash
into other powder-enthusiasts, and where’s the fun in that? 72% on Metacritic. It’s time to answer the call of duty once
again! Are you going to win the medal of honour? On the battlefield? Okay enough of that. A world war 2 shooter, you play through a
campaign based in the Red, British, and US armies. I played a portion of the Russian campaign
in my brief time with it, and I must say I fared much better in this tutorial than I
did with Call of Duty 3. I could actually hear my instructor this time
for a start, however I wasn’t initially trusted with a firearm. Oh, none for me then? Gun in hand it was time for grenade practice,
and in a genius move not yet repeated in subsequent call of duty games, we were given potatoes. Like. as many as we wanted! With impressive set pieces, some quite intimidating
moments, and appropriate wrist-slapping for accidental friendly fire, call of duty 2 is
a very impressive launch game, and earned 89% on Metacritic for its efforts. Condemned: Criminal Origins – or Condemned
if you wanna get European about this – has not aged gracefully in a graphical sense - He
looks like if max payne and a breeze block had a love child – but it still found a
way to bully me right off the bat. NO! I just OH GOD WHY. A horror game pitching you as an investigator
looking into the match maker killer, it puts the player in the angular shoes of Ethan Thomas,
and as such has you scan crime scenes for evidence using one of the most obtuse mechanics
I’ve ever seen in a video game. I fortunately had a gun to protect myself
from any spooky boys lurking in the shadows, but quickly ran out of ammo for some reason. Fortunately you can pluck weapons from your
environment and OH MY GOODNESS IF IT ISN’T A BIT VIOLENT. It’s all a bit slow and clunky, but it does
effectively build tension and oh boy is it really dark all the time. Criticised for its story but praised for its
controls, Condemned holds a lofty 81% on Metacritic. Oh yeah here we go, sports time! I’ve played a football game before, and
I’ve also watched football... but... not in a place like this. Where are we? And excuse me, is that meant to be david beckham? Oh david what did they do to your beautiful
face. Taking place on the – you guessed it – road
to the 2006 world cup, fifa ’06 road to fifa world cup, really stretched its definition
or indeed necessity of existing at all to a breaking point. To pad out the run time, you end up playing
in a variety of friendlies and other competitions, with some taking place as early as 2004. HOW LONG IS THIS ROAD EXACTLY. It also falls squarely into that period of
time where PES was eating FIFA’s lunch, meaning controls are imprecise, player AI
REFUSES TO MAKE RUNS INTO THE BOX, you can’t tackle anyone because they run in jerky circles
to avoid you, and the opposition defenders can score absolute worldies with ease. 62% on Metacritic. Absolutely ridiculous. Quentin Tarantino’s in it though. I think more games should be as literal as
GUN when it comes to titling. Fifa could be BALL, Forza could be CAR, and
Batman Akham Knight could be AGGRAVATED-ASSAULT – hyphenated of course. A western themed action adventure game set
in the 1880’s you play as colton white, and begin by being taught the basics by your
father Ned. Behold the natural splendour of north America! The gunplay is fun, with a sort of deadeye
mode that flits between targets, murdering with ease, but one of the tutorial wolves
I needed to kill didn’t spawn properly, so I had to parkour my way up a ridge and
jump to try and shoot it. There’s never a dull moment though, with
a variety of different set pieces kicking off all over the place. KILL BOATS? oh. I have to say I quite liked what I played
of GUN, and gamespot called it “a 19th century grand theft auto”. Oh how little they knew... 79% on Metacritic, and I should never own
a horse in real life. Welcome to the world of Kameo where everyone
looks like megan fox, and... oh god... oh no what happened!. One of two launch games developed by the legendary
Rare, Kameo: Elements of Power stars Kameo - an Elf who can turn into different monsters
with different abilities – think Ben 10 set in Narnia and you’re on the right track. She’s on a quest to recover her elemental
powers and save her captive family from a jealous evil sister, and the only way she
can do that is by slowly making her way through different levels and failing to roll up ramps. Praised for its colour palette and graphics,
Kameo drew criticism for its awkward controls and repetitiveness, and I’ve got to say,
I agree. While I fully appreciate I’m playing a 15-year
old game, none of what I experienced was particularly fun, and for an action adventure title, it
was surprisingly slow. However, given that it reportedly began development
on the Nintendo 64, that might not be too much of a shock. 79% on Metacritic. Oh yeah, here we go, sports time! I’ve played an American football game before. But I’ve never watched American football,
so I’m going to give this everything I’ve got. So that mcnabb, huh? Sure seems to be a big deal... of some kind. The 69ers were back in action once more and
wouldn’t you know it! The pre-match hype boys return! What are you doing though, stop it you look
foolish! It’s the return of the sports charts once
more, and I even asked the titular Madden for help... who didn’t help that much to
be honest. Do they really have to celebrate after every
single tackle though? Just poor sportsmanship. Madden NFL 06 is indistinguishable to me from
Madden NFL 07 except that I managed to score a touchdown this time. Suck it Donovan Mcnabb... who probably isn’t
playing today. Whatever, SUCK IT MCNAB. 74% on Metacritic. Oh yeah, here we go, sports time! I’ve played a basketball game before. But I’ve never watched basketball, so I’m
going to give this everything I’ve got. Where on earth am I? Why is there a scary robot hoop? Hang on... is this the same place as Fifa
06? Say what you want about the 69ers, but goodness
gracious are they good at a lot of sports. I got applauded onto the court much like Madden
– which is honestly all just getting a bit strange – and... oh god we’re off apparently. WHAT ARE THESE CAMERA ANGLES I DON’T KNOW
WHAT’S HAPPENING. I get this is likely close to the real thing
but damn, I just want to see what I’m doing. Also, do I tackle or just wait for them to
drop the ball? I can’t seem to do anything to them. BUCKETS! Hahah, still got it-oh, oh no. Oh dear Kyle how embarrassing. 64% on Metacritic, with 360 gamer magazine
UK calling it “entirely competent”. Sweet. Oh shut up, I have, can, and will kill dozens
with lessons you teach me in this game. Oh man, look at that really cool car! Can’t wait to drive it. Come on, I don’t want another rubbish car,
although... Nice. It’s in the story mode of need for speed
most wanted that you get to shine the most then, actually letting you drive the super
rad car from the cover... for a bit. It also features this very surreal combination
of in game footage and real actors on a greenscreen, although to match the visual style they’ve
smeared about 15 layers of Vaseline on the camera. It’s actually quite compelling though, and
if you were into your fast and furious with ambitions of your own to do mad naughty races,
the idea of racing and beating the members of the most wanted list is quite the tantalising
proposition. Even if most of the dialogue sounded like
this. Yeah alright mate, Mia Townsend is an angel
we don’t deserve and I don’t think she’s gonna go for you. People have ridiculous names and weird hair,
but that’s what life was like in 2005 so don’t argue. 83% on Metacritic. The second Rare title to feature in the 360
launch line up is Perfect Dark Zero, the prequel to the trailblazing N64 original. There’s one thing you can say for sure about
it, and that’s that the DNA is intact, certainly looking like a modernised version of its predecessor. Starring then-bounty hunter Joanna Dark, the
game’s story can be played in singleplayer or co-op, and has you try to stop a shady
corporation from doing bad things. I know, ominous stuff. The expectations for this follow-up were understandably
sky-high, and while it reviewed very well – 81% on Metacritic – many felt it didn’t
meet they hype. There are also these bits you have to control
an EMP Bot, and honestly the camera was so close and the objective so unclear that it
made me feel quite unwell. It’s a great game then, and despite the
inclusion of a 32-person multiplayer, it wasn’t necessarily what fans were expecting as the
next chapter in Joanna’s storied career. Also apparently it’s sponsored by Samsung? Boasting the longest name of any of the xbox
360 launch games, Peter Jackson's King Kong: The Official Game of the Movie serves not
only to recount the events of Peter Jackson's King Kong: The Official Movie that Peter Jackson's
King Kong: The Official Game of the Movie is based on, but is also definitive proof
that NOT ALL MOVIE ADAPTATIONS ARE BAD. JESUS WHAT WAS THAT. You play as both Jack Driscoll and actual
king kong himself – although sadly I didn’t play far enough to experience the big furry
boy in all his glory. Featuring a very boisterous jack black, weird
imp things, and the triumphant return of giant enemy crabs, you and kong have to survive
the horrors of skull island and make it out the other side – although for some reason
every time jack black’s character screams, the subtitles read ANN. It’s visually impressive and surprisingly
cinematic, and scored 80% on Metacritic, with reviewers praising the game's immersive environments
and action sequences. GOOD GOD I AM GOING SO VERY FAST. Project Gotham Racing 3 makes you feel fast,
like, really fast. So fast it’s a challenge to brake in time
for corners fast. While I was obviously a little sad it didn’t
take place in Gotham... NOTTINGHAMSHIRE, it does allow you to race
all across the world in some very nice vehicles. In fact, breaking with driving game tradition,
when it comes time to pick your first car it actually let’s you buy a nice one! Triplejump colours, naturally. Your driving ability is marked as you go,
earning you kudos for doing nice drifts and sensible/oh god I’m going to kill the spectators
braking. It even featured a rudimentary track creator,
allowing you to plot a course around one of the game’s cities – new York, las vegas,
London, and Tokyo. It’s simplistic, but it did let you share
your creations with your friends, and produce courses with ridiculous turns, like this. It looks pretty, plays very well, and achieved
88% on Metacritic as a result. Nice work, speedy boy. Oh this seems nice... oh no... OH NO... OH NOOOOO. Quake 4 is the dark and spooky successor to
ID software’s legendary Quake 3. It differs from its predecessor however, by
prominently featuring a story mode, in stark contrast to Quake 3’s more multiplayer-focussed
offering. The campaign then, picks up where Quake 2
left off – are you keeping up? – putting you in the boots of Matthew Kane, a member
of Rhino Squad during a brutal war against THE STROGG. Taking the fight directly to the alien’s
homeworld, it’s up to you to shoot baddies in the face and try not to get too scared
when sent down dark corridors covered in blood all on your own. The shooting is suitably fun, and my god if
that isn’t a silky smooth frame rate right there. Heaps of praise for the singleplayer then,
but a somewhat lacking multiplayer too similar to Quake 3 lost it marks from several outlets. 75% on Metacritic. Oh yeah, here we go, sports time! I’ve played a golf game before. But I’ve never watched golf, so I’m going
to give this everything I’ve got. We’re straight into career mode and if these
aren’t the most horrifying presets you’ve ever seen then you’re lying to me and to
jesus HOW DARE YOU. What tiger woods pga tour 2006 does have however,
is the holy grail of character creation suites – a min/max button. What started as an attempt to make a golfer
that looked like me, quickly turned into an oblivion character... and then a funko pop
come to life? Poor tiger woods has had his partner drop
out and so he asked specifically for me. He’s made the right choice. My stats were incredibly low, so it was difficult
to do big or accurate hits – which is actual golfing terminology thank you very much. Somehow I seemed to have impressed him however,
but no matter what I promise you I will find a way to let him down. It earned 71% on Metacritic, and you’ve
got to imagine that’s for the min/max button alone. Another launch line up, another appearance
from the radical cool skater boy bird man. Positioned as a more grounded and grungy take
on skater culture after hitting people in testicles for two years during the underground
games, your American Wasteland create-a-skater arrives in LA after running away from parents
who really, like, just wanna harsh your buzz, man. You’re quickly met by Mindy – a local
skater – and promptly ridiculed for looking like a country bumpkin, so it’s off to the
skate shops to get a nice makeover AND TO BECOME THE MOST BEAUTIFUL SKATER OF THEM ALL. Given it’s set in LA, it riffs on many Hollywood
themes, including one moment where you have to kickflip over Ben Whoflick. YES! Nailed it, oh bugger. Critics praised the story for making its ragtag
characters endearing and likeable, but they weren’t so keen on how easy the game was,
which, given how rubbish I was at tony hawk’s American wasteland, just goes to show how
bad I am at them. 75% on Metacritic. And there you have it, all of the EU Xbox
360 launch line up played and reviewed – sort of – in 2020. Were there any favourites of yours among them,
let me know all about it in the comments below. Also if you could share this video and subscribe
I’d really appreciate it very much. Thanks so much for watching, and I’ll see
you soon. Bye!
OH YEAH, HERE WE GO, SPORTS TIME!
I've played and watched a sport before But I'm not going to give this anything I've got.