People Share Why Their EX is an EX (r/AskReddit)

a slash is credit why is your X and X first time poster here so let's start off with a whimper my ex came with a lot of personal baggage attached a lot of which I didn't find out until sometime down the line abusive father cigarette scars on her arms from her childhood a brother with PTSD and a mother who came with her own personal problems it also affected her psychologically she was a grown woman but was very attached to Disney movies seventh heaven and other things that were about the warm fuzzies she saw me as her personal knight in shining armor taking her away from her miserable life something of which I became very uncomfortable with it got to the point where she was talking about marriage six months into the relationship she was also very clearly I went away for a three-day holiday to the Gold Coast I lived in South Australia at the time to meet some friends who came down from Malaysia and all she could talk about when I called her was that I wasn't there with her three days away and she couldn't exist without me eventually we broke up for a while but got back together to try again we moved into a rental house together with a mutual friend and from there things got worse her work was getting difficult and she brought her problems home with her she became paranoid and convinced our mutual friend was cheating with me she became self-centered melodramatic and alienated everyone around her she was miserable in her work life having panic attacks but refused to return home to Adelaide when I suggested she moved back for her own personal health and we could try a long-distance relationship she became inconsolable and claimed I was breaking up with her by the end I had had enough I had been considering moving to Japan for a while at that point and had even discussed it with her and she always insisted on injecting herself into the equation even though it was obvious she wasn't emotionally equipped to handle living overseas it was after the last time we had sex that she immediately started asking about when we were going to Japan I broke up with a then and there poor timing I'll admit but there was never any other time just like that I became the villain she packed up moved out quit her job came back two months later had another panic attack slash hissy fit at me then left for good a couple years later I finally did move to Japan and I'm a lot happier if anything my relationship with her taught me about what I like in a woman in particular someone who doesn't come with enough unresolved emotional / psychological issues to fill a warehouse this will probably get buried now but anyways I was with my ex for five years between the ages of 17 to 21 he was my first everything and I was his to one day just after our five year anniversary and one week before my 21st birthday he randomly got off of work for the night and sent me a text saying that he didn't want to be with me anymore it was so random that I assumed someone had stolen his phone and was playing around with us both it had been a perfectly normal day he had texted me just fine on all of his other work breaks and I stopped over at his house the night before there was literally zero sign that this dude was about to break up with me over a text the thing that hurt the most was he said in this text that he had been back quote unhappy for years with our relationship that stuck with me for a long time why didn't he just tell me at the first instance he started feeling unhappy with us I felt as though he had lead me along and there is a kicker here one month before he dumped me we found out I was pregnant it was an accidental pregnancy of course as we were both still living with parents as soon as he dumped me he started claiming the pregnancy was all one big elaborate lie so that I could backquote get him back even though he had been there with me when I did the test and got a blood test with my doctor to confirm he told all of our mutual friends and his family that I was a psychopathic liar this messed me up hugely nobody wanted to speak to me anymore or be my friend I even got meth is from his older brother abusing me he also switched occasionally from backquote she's totally lying to back quote the baby can't me mine I don't think he could make his mind up the long story short part here is that I got an abortion in the end I documented all of this I printed off all my medical records and sheets and Emma hauled them to him mutual friends and his family I know I shouldn't have had to do this but I was emotionally [ __ ] I've never been more messed up in my life he didn't reply to the email none of them did I've not heard from him since a brief rumor floated around that his photoshopped the images I've never used Photoshop in my life and wouldn't know where to begin it's been four years now and I'm married to the most wonderful man I thanked my ex in my head every single day as he lead me to my husband the most upsetting thing is my husband recently found out he is infertile and we are heading for IVF next month and it has all made me realize that sometimes the best people in life are the ones worst off my ex was the fat ugly loser kid at school and stylist I now realize looking back that he was punching above his weight with me and theps coming from someone with low self-esteem if anyone reads this and you are also going through something similar it gets better I promise in hindsight my ex likely did show signs of not wanting anything long-term with me he didn't want to move in with me he didn't even want to go on vacation with me now I've got a beautiful house with my husband and we traveled the world every year it has worked out for us albeit some sadness went away for boot camp our normal monthly spending between us and my son was roughly $600 a month maybe $1000 if we splurged no big deal after two months of no contact I finally got to talk to her and my boy again and to look at my bank account somehow went from $1,000 a month maximum to roughly $4,000 about 750 dollars less than I made a month there she said it was for sons clothes and food so I ignored it until she flew in to visit while I was in school covered in brand-new full-color some hadn't littering since when has that been a thing tattoos I'm talking laid to ten of them while my son is wearing shoes that actually had duct tape holding them together that was step one I immediately opened a new bank account and kept all my money separately except for what was absolutely needed at home strike two I would spend roughly $400 myself every month on food and one hotel room split between me and two of my buddies for a once a month outing to Chicago during school to her this was far too much and I was wasting all of our money and I was a bad parent because of this strike three she had no diploma yet so we planned on hiring a babysitter for three months while she returned to studies to get that so she could start college three months of babysitter salary later she explains that she just didn't have enough time and never even started the program she used the babysitting time to go out with friends party get more tattoos et Cie who knows all the other stuff she did strike four I know there's only supposed to be three strikes but she is the mom of my child so I tried to give her some extra chances she would get over-the-top furious with me and accuse me of cheating if I didn't Skype her literally every night sometimes after being at school until 1:00 to 2:00 a.m. I would try to go to bed right away to be up for a watch or something at 5:00 a.m. and she would blow up and call me every name under the Sun long story long I ended it right before I left school and ended up meeting my wife about a month later didn't know it at the time and life has looked better ever since we are now amicable co-parents and I'm still trying to make her get a jet or diploma so I'm not the only role model and financial support for my son my ex and I were together for three almost four yes let's call her and we were college sweethearts and we both graduated with the same college program in the same year she is somewhat well-off since her parents work as board room executives from a big company in our country Philippines and she always covers for me since I came from an average working-class family despite that she understands my financial standpoint and her family treated me like family and Sain goes to my family towards her we were trying to be real adults by starting a career she wanted to pursue a teaching career and a masters and possibly a PhD while I want to make a living in the corporate world not long in reality struck me and my family really hard my family had a major financial problem that forced me to also chip in so I was barely surviving on a paycheck to paycheck lifestyle of course I told this to my aunt and she was really supportive emotionally she would often buy me groceries and sometimes even give me financial support if I come short of course I was hesitant but eventually accepted her financial support since we had a serious debt not long I discovered that and stopped going to her certification course to become a licensed teacher and she's already spending her masters money on me she kept it a secret from me and I only discovered it when she started working for a job which I know she doesn't like and said that she just took it as an extra source of cash she bought a condo unit for the both of us and we always have a conversation about settling down slowly everything is slowly going downhill we would have constant banters and fights that was emotionally drugging one time we had a major argument and out of rapes she blurted out why can't you be a better boyfriend and that woke me up after she said those words I realized that I was dragging her down she stopped her dreams of becoming a professor because of me she started a job I know she despised because she wants to support me she sacrificed too much because she loved me that much eventually I was the one to broke it off she doesn't want to end it personally I also don't want to end it but I want her to pursue her dreams and I don't want her to regret anything if she kept staying with me she broke down and begged me to stay with all my will I told her that this is for the best right now she's about to have her teachers license and is working in a really prestigious international school who is catering for sped students and will eventually take up her master's degree I'm really happy that she's reaching her dreams and I'm beyond proud of her we are now on good terms and I can really say that she is genuinely happier than when she was with me indeed the breakup was for the best we were together for seven years when we got together we both adamantly didn't want kids when her mother suddenly passed and she was also entering her 30s her position flipped mine didn't she wanted to travel more and got increasingly bitter that I didn't with her that often even though I spent a good chunk of our time together not in a financial position to afford it ironically I can afford it now she was obsessed with the house always being spotless when I eventually told her I wasn't cool spending most of my weekend cleaning a house that wasn't dirty she agreed to hire a cleaner she always hated the work they did none of them made it more than three sessions even though getting a dog was her idea though I always wanted one too I always walked him because she had to travel for work a lot and would whine when she was home and I asked her to do it when we first got him I was the one who spent six weeks getting up three times a night to take him outside to housebreak him because she was traveling for work but she'd get upset that he always ran to me first when we came home she accomplished a lot of things in her career and I was super proud of her in our time together I attained some major career milestones I worked my ass off for I also did and do a ton of charity work and spend my own to help out friends in Meade and to make them happy she never once said she was proud of me for any of it or anything else she was a massive daddy's girl when her mom who I was also close to suddenly went into the hospital she said she couldn't have any visitors that weren't immediate family found out later this was [ __ ] I never got to see her before she died when she did she retreated to her parents house for weeks wouldn't come home wouldn't let me come over and barely spoke to me I was sitting in our house alone grieving with no one but my dog for company when I asked her if she could come home for just one evening so we could talk and I could try to get some emotional support she blew up at me accused me of making her mom's death all about me and called me a terrible selfish person at this point I knew it was over this was after almost two years of us effectively living as housemates that shared a bed anyway no love no passion just shared bills and very rare amounts of incredibly boring dispassionate sex I never cheated on her or anyone else but I was frequently thinking about it just so I could get some kind of intimate feeling from someone I ended up breaking it off and at the time got no emotion from her and the conversation immediately pivoted into one about selling our house shortly after the deal closed he sent me two long vicious screeds via email telling me what an awful person I was how everything was my fault and that I should be ashamed for robbing her of so many of what should have been the best years of her life we still share custody of our dog and I only speak to her to coordinate picking him up and dropping him off it's been two years since we split I'm starting a new relationship that awesome and I'm well and truly over her but thinking about these experiences still makes me sad there's lots of reasons she was insanely jealous like even a glimpse at another woman on my part would lead to an hour's long fight never mind that the woman I glanced at had been jaywalking in front of my car on a busy street arguments like that were a weekly thing so I tried to break it off a little over a year in but didn't succeed a year later she was repressing the hell out of her jealousy but took things out on me in other ways gas lighting isolating me from my family telling me how much of a failure I was so I tried to break up with her again we were apart for about two weeks when I took her back again I really loved her and with us living apart things were better for a while when she wasn't being emotionally abusive and gaslighting me she was really a joy to be around and we had a ton of the same interests sidenote it turns out that she just had those interests because I had them and she always mimics her partner's hobbies when we dated she was a peace-loving tie-dye wearing hippie now she's a gun-toting Trump voting redneck because her husband is so we had some good times for a few months then she cheated on me and didn't tell me about it for nine months during that time she started drinking excessively and when she was drunk she was mean stuff went downhill fast when she finally did tell me it was like three weeks after her grandma died I felt awful for her and even though I was really mad I didn't want to pile on I told her I needed time to think about a week later I was kind of leaning to war breaking up with her when I auditioned for a band that also needed a fiddle player my ex was a fantastic fiddle player so against my better judgment I recommended her she stuck and we were stuck together in that band for a year and a half I knew in that moment before I suggested her that if I pull the trigger there was no going back but I did and that fateful decision resulted in another three years of hell we eventually got kicked out of that band because she's extremely deaf to work with so we struggled on getting mad at each other all the time and it spiraled into a horrible relationship on both sides I don't think either of us were truly happy I stuck with her because of our history and because she was the first person I told that I was bisexual and a crossdresser she seemed to accept me and even helped me explore that side of myself things got worse between us and I eventually decided I needed to leave her for real it took months of planning but I arranged to move in with my brother's with a lease was up and they moved during this time I had realized that not only was I B but I was also trans and wanted to pursue transition for some honorable reason I decided to tell her that I was trans before we broke up I knew there was no way she would be able to stay with me through a transition even if our other problems weren't there so I think that was the tipping point between a lifetime of a relationship with someone I hated or the currents pretty awesome life I'm living fully embracing myself as a trans woman he had a sneeze fetish that he obsessed and healthily over in my sleep he'd ball up cat hair and try to put it into my nose I didn't know he was doing this to me until I had a nasty sinus infection and had my sinus flooded out at Urgent Care out came small balls of cat hair the final straw was cheating on me with a girl who had a bigger nose than me she was his ex and he just couldn't get over that nose dead pipe the fact she was literally psychotic they were perfect for each other not my loss but my mistake ever trying to be tolerant and understanding of him makes great material for the biography I'll never write edit I'm new to Reddit and didn't expect this to blow up haha for more context I suffer from narcolepsy with cataplexy doing much better now that my insurance actually covers the meds and he took advantage of the frequent opportunities I hadn't noticed but suddenly there was a searing pain and one of my sinus got very puffy I had taken a couple days off work and eventually went to Urgent Care where they did the flush it was my second time going back there desperate for help when the two very small balls came out neither the doc or I knew what the [ __ ] it was doc worried it was a mold of sorts until he broke one apart in his hand and could tell it with small black strands of hair I was confused and it didn't click until on the cab ride home what it was from I confronted him which didn't get very far wrote about that in another comment still had lingering pain but it wasn't nearly as bad after I understand this is hard to believe but at the very least you can confirm the fetish is real with a simple search sorry for typists I suck at texting on my phone edit again it's perfectly okay to laugh myself laughing at this is how I cope through it at the time in the moment I was devastated totally emotionally wrecked and confused it pretty much every aspect of it but my friends were great and like dude what if you had a child and she sneezed nothing would ever be normal and they helped me laugh through it all I had been considering breaking up with her for a while because she would lie about little things that made no sense lying about never cheated or anything but would do anything so that she would get more attention from me and other people I started noticing this when one night she sent me screenshots of her text messages between her and her dad I had known her dad for a while and the things he was saying in these texts were awful they were things like you're worthless I wish he weren't my daughter there were things he would never ever say if there was one thing he showed was how much he loved his two daughters I was kind of skeptical when she sent me these because he would never say that stuff but obviously I couldn't just come out and tell her I didn't believe her cause if it was true then I'd be a terrible person what I thought was happening was I thought she was changing her conne fact info and texting herself making it seem like it was her dad who was sending that stuff anyways this happens a few more times in the next few weeks and I'm just there for her trying to be a good boyfriend because there's always a chance it could be true well one weekend she went to a concert with her friend and after the concert she was drunk and we were facetiming and she told me that I was still in love with my ex immediately I'm like what are you talking about why do you say that and she responds by telling me that I texted my ex telling her I still love her and she has the screen shirt I told her to send it to me and there it was a screenshot of me telling my ex I love her the problem was that I never sent that and it was obvious she texted herself saying that because she was drunk and wasn't able to type that out correctly she made it realistic though because she even went out of her way to use the exact contact picture I had for my ex which was a very unique damn picture the moment this happened I knew the screenshots of her dad weren't real and I proceeded to say goodnight and break up with her the day she got back that is why she is my ex things just got very complicated very quickly I will try my best to be brief and not reveal too much of my personal life since I'm on a throw away my girlfriend and I were together for just about seven years when we split up last week I have known her since the fifth grade and every moment I spent with her were the best moments of my life so far we did everything together we were inseparable it was literally like something out of movie after our first date we spent 29 days in a row together the summer of our junior year going into our senior year of high school things were always great until a very pivotal moment I will preface this by saying I'm an idiot ass hopeless romantic and that will be my downfall in life we had both since graduated high school and had been living together happily for about a year when she came to me out of the blue with some news she said her dad got a job offer out of state that paid really well and her parents and younger sister were thinking about moving I said I'm very happy for your dad if he decided to take it her response was to ask if I would ever consider moving and I immediately said no I didn't understand why we would move with her parents when we already had our own place she was highly considering moving and thinking back now I am sure she was always planning on it no matter what I came to a crossroads and had to make a huge decision move out of state for the first time and be away from my friends family job my whole life basically or I could stay and watch the love of my life pack up and leave forever while I moved back into my parents basement everything I knew would change that I was so in love with her I couldn't picture my life without her for even a minute I decided that after a lot of thought and stress that I would move after we moved I became very depressed I hated it there I didn't have a good job anymore I didn't know anyone I didn't have any friends and my family wasn't there her family was though and we spent basically every weekend at their house and it was becoming too much for me to handle we didn't have our own life anymore it was now a life elsewhere with her parents I was dealing with a lot at the time and I wasn't handling it properly I tried to just stick it out for a while and learn to adjust to my new life we lived there for about two years when I got a phone call from my dad one Saturday I couldn't answer right away that he tried calling back immediately after so I thought it was urgent and picked up he told me over the phone that my younger brother had just killed himself my whole world shattered my brother and I were super close before I moved and when I did leave we drifted apart he was experimenting a lot with drugs and wasn't taking care of himself he stopped calling me and wouldn't answer the phone after a while I still to this day hold a lot of blame over myself for not being there I felt like I abandoned when I moved and things would be different now if I stayed when he died I decided to move back home to spend time with my family my girlfriend was about finished with getting her associate's degree both of us had been working full-time and she was getting her school finished at the same time so it was taking a while for her even though she was busting us not enough hours of the day we found out that if she moved with me right away something like nine credits wouldn't transfer so we agreed that she should stay in finish school and move later on we would only be apart for about five months easy for some reason every time I asked about her school it seemed like her finishing date would get pushed back further and further fast-forward to this month and it had already been a year with no end in sight I was always worried about being long distance that I was willing to do anything to make it work so I could be with her because I saw a real future with her we talked about marriage and having kids and everything together as time went on I felt like I had to fight harder and harder for her attention she was so busy with work school family friends working out and so on that I was just no longer a part of her daily life we used to Skype set aside time to have phone calls send each other pictures and have fun with each other all that just kind of faded after a while I tried to talk to her about it and tell her that being long distance was hard for me at this crucial point in my life and I just needed more from her her only response was I don't know what you want me to do I ultimately ended up telling her that we shouldn't be together anymore because she had her new life totally established with a great job which was becoming her career her apartment her family nearby and she was already doing school I just wasn't a priority anymore it was so hard to let her go but I knew that she would end up living out a better life where she is now than she ever would with me it is absolutely destroying me and I still believe that I will never have anything like I did with her and I'm not sure if I will ever be able to get over it I feel like everything good in my life I used to have is now gone and I just don't know who I even am anymore thank you so much for watching the whole video please leave a like and subscribe

Channel: Slime King

Views: 27,785

Rating: 4.8413363 out of 5

Keywords: high school, reddit stories, askreddit funny, askreddit scary, reddit top posts, askreddit comedy, comment awards, askreddit, top posts, dankify reddit, brainydude reddit, tz reddit, r/, askreddit creepy stories, toadfilms, reddit and chill, middle school, middle school cringe, teacher, pupil, parrents, tantrum, askreddit friends, askreddit secrets, askreddit parents, family secrets, askreddit kids

Id: jiwChCXgums

Length: 28min 31sec (1711 seconds)

Published: Tue Jan 28 2020