Ocho Breaks Down: Real Men Cry Too | I AM ATHLETE with Brandon Marshall, Chad Johnson & More

so if you didn't know this show is 25 straight mondays 25 straight you know we shoot these at different times i know people you know see them every week but it's a it's a grind and a hustle for all of us to get here and do this and i'm proud of the crew i'm proud of the cast and i'm mostly proud of the fans who are starting to follow us we got three hundred thousand three hundred thousand it's a big it's a big moment guys sorry 300k 300k on youtube a year in less than five months four months five months so we're killing it and we we want to thank the fans and to do that we have a little present not just for the fans for you guys as well hey season i like that for the two for the crew and not only that we're gonna we're gonna make a limited run on these so people can get their hands on them all right wow so if you haven't already if these are out go check it out because there's not gonna be too many go get yours and maybe even we'll have you guys sign a couple and give a couple away or something like that let's do it all right congratulations guys thank you all mom let's get after it can i ask you a question real quick before you go this is the locker room and we're really intentional on protecting that type of conversation had cam newton on obviously recently and he was able to get some things off his chest and it was a safe space so a lot of people don't know you know behind the scenes that's what makes everything go yeah give me a little bit about your store who are you what you do because like athlete locker room yeah yeah you know i like to try to sneak in here when i can but uh i'm the director technically uh anthony cerratelli jersey filmmaker i'm gonna shout myself out a little bit shameless shameless plug you know how we do on the show but um yeah we you know behind the scenes is it's a it's a hustle from when we shoot during the week to get these out on monday i know i don't care about all that and they ain't pay i know they people flaming me for cutting y'all cutting everybody off every time stop afraid i finally read the comments and i seen what you've been talking about let me finish let me finish it oh that's a shirt [Laughter] but no but but no but here's here's what i want to do you play in the majors right and that transition so baseball player locker room what we're doing athletes behind the scenes athletes everything we're doing is about the athlete and people we're partnering with um how is that transition for you uh it was actually a little bit easier than i expected but um working with guys like you make that easy man i feel like i'm at home because it's the same thing you know it's like it on the show is the same way we we come together the whole cast the whole crew it's like it's like being on a t it is a team you know and uh the part that i i hope doesn't happen that happens on these teams and you guys will know you play with guys for months at a time right day after day you're with them end of the season or or in like camp someone gets cut and you don't see them again you know just like that and i hope that doesn't happen here man we want to keep this team together we want to keep going keep grinding keep growing uh because it's a good feeling to be back in that situation let's go all right we had to fight to get a meal yeah i'll pass a lot to take the test before i pass class yeah and my family needed bread i had to come correct that's why i keep airing it out like i just passed daddy don't entertain this let's go what's that don't entertain talk to me little cactus jack mcdonald's i like this got you some oh that's the real deal yeah yeah that ain't nothing cheap that's travis scott yeah yeah oh wow here you go and i got you a three pack a little socks appreciate that i love if he was who you say you was you would have had travis scott deliver it man i don't even play them type of games but i just i ordered this so this is for you and me what me what me she coming i need a double x double that yeah yeah unless she want me to look like you nice big thighs right the whole thing huh but uh how's the athlete yeah i need to rock this all right we got you we got the double x i appreciate that and i'm recycling my bag all right i'll take my bag all right gotcha put my bag on bro damn bro let's go jane brown i got you i told you i was trying to get you some jeans but you turned me down you want to dress me like i'm a child no i just want to give you some jeans in all seriousness man um one of the things that we do internally with our team is before we even start meetings we do uh post checks and we ask where is everybody one in ten business personal and mental mental fitness level basically mental health and the reason why i feel like i want to start the show this show um this way is because of vincent jackson dude dude laid in a in a hotel for almost three days and nobody found him right dead so we talk about this being a locker room and in a locker room accountability and just checking in man like a lot of dudes struggling so you know i'm gonna kick it off real quick and i really just focus on mental health mental fitness and just personal so for me mental fitness i'm not a i'm not a i'll be honest which i'm out of 10 right now you know because i'm reconnecting with our team and just kind of coming out of you know cloud nine and connecting with you know everyone that we working with from production to the business and um so i'm out of ten right now because it feels good to reconnect that's my mental fitness level so i'm good talk therapy yoga meditation all of that no need to worry about me i'm all right right now maybe next week things may change from a personal standpoint i'm out of ten also took some time off been running 100 miles per hour went up to vale snowboarded with the family everybody made it down the mountain good um we got all of our limbs i remember it's interesting because i was at the mountain and i thought about you okay right because like i remember back in the day you know you was talking about this when i first got in league it was like man the black ski summit in aspen yeah i was like who what black people go snowboarding beautiful thing it's the best thing ever bro and you you actually i'll let you you know say i know you you into it the family into it so i'm out of 10 across the board right now i'm good not every week is like that but right now i'm out of 10 i'm good i mean uh like anything in life right we we go through what we go through um i'm doing the best i could do and i have my moments where i have to slow down and kind of look in the mirror and make sure i'm good i have to ask myself are you good you know what i'm saying so um i have a good support team you know all in all i have a really good support team and i think a lot of us need that we spoke about that before uh you know and and a lot of times when i go and i eat certain ways and i do certain things i kind of do my own personal checks my discipline checks to see where i'm where i am at um to see if my brain is good like seeing my thinking straight you know we have moments where we forget the most simplest things and then that sort of for me it frightens me right um and then at those at those moments i wanted them and is this creeping up on me you know because they if you listen to them too long they'll say all of us are supposed to have cte you know and and just really i'm i'm good though i'm good so from a mental fitness standpoint from a mental fitness standpoint man one to ten i'm i'm i'm not a 10. you know i'm i have my daily struggles you know i have my my moments when i question myself but um i don't know man probably seven and a half eight you know um because it's not i'm not perfect and personal family good everybody everything is good everything is good you know we work on that um but just really just to go back to vincent you know we were considering uh uh doing us a spot on location in tampa i know we ready for the school we mentioned that right before the super bowl and i reached out to him and uh you know as you mentioned the things he's done post career with his restaurant you know been entrepreneur and really just embracing the tampa community and i reached out to him and see if we can uh uh use his restaurant as a location for the crew if we did decide to go up to tampa during super bowl week and uh his response of course you know he's checking out the show he uh so but we didn't get to it obviously and then a few weeks after that or a week or so after that um you know we have to hear this untimely death due to whatever the circumstances are yeah unfortunately social that's what we were going to cash if they would have opened up the super bowl that's what frail correct correct cross the shooter super bowl episode yeah man but uh yeah it still messes with me were you at one to ten uh personal in mental fitness i'll say i don't know how y'all feel about it but i'll say business-wise knowing y'all you know y'all three knowing y'all guys that's the easiest part so i'm gonna start from the from the from number three to go to number one the business side bro we're gonna do our thing as we did our whole life we had to take care of business like the business side of it keeping the money right keeping the business right the media side fred is a genius at the investment and stuff i should i wish fred fred taught me so much about the investments and all that stuff and then what y'all do that's the easiest thing that's what we do that's what we we've transitioned from playing ball from working out to getting ready for a show same routine same routine we can lock in that routine so business i would if anybody asked me about y'all three i would say business is set the more important side of it is the personal and the mental health and the personal side with the family that's the stress of it that's the stressor in life and the mental health and that's tied to it so we just went on vacation bro i can't go to vail very expensive as hell it is bro bro a beer in vail is 13 [ __ ] dollars i went to bed one time with my family i told my wife yeah this skin ain't for us because this [ __ ] so we go to minnesota the mountains ain't as big the shane is nice is that that's why you was in minnesota bro it's a mountain and they can slide down your skis yeah yes my family skied four days while we was up there bro i hit i hit i hit him up when i was there because i was you know in a group chat y'all saw me post or whatever and he's like oh i'm in minnesota skiing too i'm like bro why are you why you ain't telling me like we could have all went together so you ain't go cause you cheat he's available bro bruh eat fifty dollars a ski in minnesota thousand dollars of ski in vail look into next time around looking to the poconos right outside of philly camelback mountain resort the whole family big resort the kids can play indoor water parks the whole outdoor small slopes and have a lot of fun the pokemon pokemon it's funny because i was in vail and i ran into peyton manning we stayed at the same hotel see look at that look at that look look look who's in veil it's a perfect example but but when i was talking to us you know we chopping it up catching up and then i was like uh uh eli he was just skiing where was he he was talking to poker nose and peyton was like who's skiing the poke nose what they say come on but but that's what they say and also with the um but just that taking a family vacation i know you just did we were talking about it and just taking that fan vacation getting away to where those stressors are out of your relationship where we just lay in the bed and i can talk to my wife and just about nothing just talk to her what you doing what's this what's that you about to get married so you might want to you know account for this but yeah just talk to her without all those stresses in your mind without you know the kids got to go to school virtual school get them right do this and that and just really talk to your wife and we've been married now it's 10 you know 10 plus years and that's the thing too so the personal side for me is the wife and family and i say it all the time that's what when when when people say like special or what sets you apart from other people i really think my relationship with my wife and kids is special like i don't think people have a relationship with their sons like i have with my son and y'all can y'all can debate me because y'all have kids but with my son and my daughter like that's special to me with my newborn that's special to me every time he sees me he smiles gum he ain't got the gum now mother smile gummy smile but he sees me he knows that's daddy and then my wife to be special so that side but the mental health side man i think we all struggle with that and fred you kind of hit on it where people try to convince us that we're broken as football players they try to convince you that you're broken and i don't want to fall into the fact that i'm broken i'm not broken am i supposed to hit my head in other human beings i know that was wrong because nobody goes into a grocery store and runs ahead into somebody else have you ever seen somebody hit each other in aisle six cause that's not what humans do so that that's not normal what we lean up on our six i ran him over clean up on the foot fred you cussed me out i would have ran your ass fred no we played each other you know run me over you had a chance did i got you on the ground what it was pre-season we finished this week we'll talk about this all yeah yeah but the mental side of it is where i do fight with the fact that when i'm when i have a rough day when i wake up quote unquote on the wrong side of the bed is that football or is that these stressors that i was just talking about so to your point fred i can't say i'm out of mental i would say with business i'm always out of 10 because i can control that with my family i'm always out of ten cause i can control that i can talk with my wife we can communicate and that's the greatest thing about my wife is that we talk about everything that whole get mad and get mad and leave the we ain't getting mad and leaving we gotta talk this [ __ ] out we gonna sit in the same bed we're gonna go to sleep together but the side of the mental health i don't know the number because of the fact that there's so it's a muddy water when you talk about ex-football players and mental health why do i feel this way is it cte or is it just these life stressors and i really think a lot of players had that problem talking about vincent jackson i think a lot of the toxicology report and all that stuff come out with vincent why why would he quote unquote drink himself to that or whatever he did to get to the point that vincent was in and that's what scares me when i see dudes we played against 38 bro 38 years old i'm 37 when i like dudes like that like you see dude we play with that's just younger than us so right at our age why did why why did his route head that way that's what scared me that's why i can never say my mental health is i can't say it's a team friend and we'll talk to the old show but the trickier thing for me is when you look at someone like vincent someone who on the surface you know and and i say this with all respect you know to you know uh to the situation and his family on the outside it looks amazing you know what i mean that's social everything looks so genuine and so so so uh prosperous you know what i mean like it's just ascending and then we have you know something like this happen and again we don't know the you know the underlying uh situation we don't know that we haven't uh found that out yet but the speculation is because he's a nfl player you know i just saw where you know the family donated his brain to uh research for cte so the speculation is maybe it's another uh a case of of cte that sort of mature maturated into this right so but but we don't know but again that's usually what the the the percentages are are we supposed to go that way because when you see these guys we're we look like we're ascending then all of a sudden we sort of hit a hurdle and then things just fall off the cliff you know what i'm saying you just even we talked about say out just recently we spoke about sea and a few other guys where it seemed like they're situations where we're good and the next thing you know what causes us or them to just snap that's the thing you're talking about i'm good you say i'm good family i'm good with this like even vincent you talking about the business like you said it's the senate his business business acumen right was ascending his family was ascending but what about between your ears that does you know i i really can't say that but that's impulsiveness like what what happens and what what actually happens with this disease you know what i'm saying is this these brain injuries this disease is ultimately what it becomes what happens at the end of the day you know what i'm saying and i have a few other things i want to talk about but go ahead just to top that off it's like for you know i think we need to bring on jared aldrick back because he did a whole documentary on cte yeah you know jared got into it when we were talking the iron black with the mod aubry and just our different viewpoints or whatever but you know i think he has some interesting um he has an interesting perspective on this and he can also educate a lot of people because he spent um years doing research and traveling the world you know asking questions with the top doctors in the world about cte a lot of people don't understand it but i gotta say man like this vincent jackson deal um it really rocked me and that's why i think like this conversation is important because we don't do this like men don't do this you know women do it naturally and to me it starts from childhood where you know i got twins and i always use i got i stole this from my pastor twins boy girl z and ziggy z and ziggy go outside they both fall down what we do in society is we pick up the little girl and we validate her and we say oh baby it's okay okay to cry to show your emotions express yourself in that manner so we're validating her to connect with those emotions our little boys fall down you guys are out with us we all got boys sons um it's get up you know what i'm saying be tough boys don't cry so like this right here is important because bro sat there for three days you know what i'm saying and and we're you know teammates coaches why we don't check in on each other why we don't talk like this you know what i mean three days bro you know and like you say on the outside cast social his foundation family you know everything looked good everybody's speaking so good about him like not him so it's powerful man this one rocked me ocho i mean this is this is dope and this is something i've never done before i've never been a part of anything like that when you talk about checking in it normally comes from your immediate family members your mama your father your kids obviously yours maybe not old enough to be able to do that but i get that at home from that small support group that i do have uh business business-wise as always you know it's it's a train it's a train it's like an engine it's a well-oiled machine that's always going to be going um personally obviously uh my support system is extremely small it always has been i have immediate family that that are there but outside of that my support system is always the kids their moms we all work as one big unit so i consider them my support system obviously now shirelle has become part of that so i could say i'm a 10. um mentally you know we lost i lost mom we lost we lost my hurricane so um probably now probably a seven you know it it me up a little bit to lose uh you know the person that birthed me you know the person responsible for who i am and uh other than that i've been good but the fact that i've been going and keeping busy how can i get my mind off of that because the memory that memory is going to always be there you know being able to smile look at the videos and always live through those moments that we had good and bad you know um that's it other than that that's i like life in general because each day is [ __ ] different but what i learned through the ups and downs that not only i've been through all of a sudden here and the people that are going to see this is finding that happy medium and that balance to get that mother pendulum to keep it from swinging and try to get that like this every single day and not allowing outside thing to deter that joy yeah and i somewhat want to say i've mastered that because when you see me you see me tweeting and you see me in public it's i love you i'm hugging people i'm always smiling and one of my lowest moments happened you know two three weeks ago when i got that call you know yo um you need to come by and i knew there was a problem because i got a call from an immediate family member but you normally don't call me and i call from three other people wait i even get my number when my number changed in december so i knew it was an issue and i called my brother right away and he answered the phone crying i just hung up i didn't know what time it was and so then i mentally prepared myself to bury my whole girl and [ __ ] here we go yeah that was forever that was that was from the first person you ever saw first person you ever remember to now you know my mom my mom had she had breast cancer and now she had skin cancer and when all that happens i think about it well this is we're not we're not immortal well we everybody has an expiration date and to deal with that why don't why don't we to y'all's point why don't we talk to each other like chad you just said your support system is small we so cool with each other our kids play together we hang out we party we gamble why don't men talk to each other about stuff like this why wouldn't i why would i having a tough time do i not call y'all like what what what brandon said just a few minutes ago you know like uh z ziggy z and ziggy yeah z is the boy yep right z you teach your son to be strong and be tough you you you play football they say you you're you know you're a warrior is what the coaches told you you're into high life right you're a gladiator so you're supposed to be tough and a lot of guys can't separate the feel from from life you've seen that before where everything they do is is is football you know what i'm saying and um that toughness it carries over into real life and for that a lot of guys don't want to share or look weak you know they're so prideful right so we get into these situations where we we've done a a a a very transparent job of being vulnerable you know just being real i don't want to say being vulnerable but being real and just showing our vulnerability and that's why you know so many people are engaged you know to the show so so my guess my question is this like are you really at a seven you know what i'm saying and the reason why i say that right because like is it a seven or is it a three because no because if it was a three i wouldn't be able to function yeah you wouldn't be able to function but but because of the machismo because of the like like what you just said fred you know what i mean about channing asked why and then you went into what you just said because we macho no right it's not about that but i can't be macho and i'm not i'm not in a position because kids that train has to keep moving so if i'm at a three i'm flat line i can't flat line there's no time in the flat line i have time to grieve i've done my grieving and i will continue to grieve over and over i will continue to cry over and over but that train has to keep going so i'm at a seven a seven is okay you're five uh i'm on my deathbed but i ain't dead but if you give me a three ain't no reason to be living so i know it's uh it's all fresh i know it's all fresh but is there you know i haven't lost a parent yet you know so i don't even know what that experience is like and to be honest with you because of what we talking about the machismo i don't know how it feel you know because like how we trained and how we built you know just keep going keep going like you said so like is there like there's a lot of people who have what you know is there anything they they can learn from you your experience i mean mine mine is still early you know so i'm still processing everything i'm still learning to live with it i'm still learning to be able to drive down you know the grandma house obviously passed in 2018 and not see my mom out on the front porch i'm learning to pull up and sit in her chair and not have her sitting there smoking a weed with that tangerine and ruby red vodka you know make let me ask you this though does it make you feel at peace knowing that that's life's natural progression meaning meaning hold up meaning have you ever asked yourself what if she had to bury you you're not supposed to you don't want to ever have to bury your child remember that mock you know what i mean you remember y'all probably remember anybody remember the marriage boot camp and i'm talking to everybody in here remember the i did marriage boot camp family edition because my mom and i we've always like this because my grandma raised me so the marriage boot camp edition there was a mock funeral to try to get my mom to understand what would happen if you had to bury a son so we did the whole me and the casket the whole night the makeup as if i had passed and you talk about tv gold was my old girl she don't cut no corners and don't pull no punches which is why we call a hurricane paula because that season when it came to her was year round and she walked in there she looked at me in the casket and the doctor at the time was like paula this is your son he just passed away anything you want to say anything you feel no i don't think anything listen this is my mama yeah so i'm numb to this because i've been dealing with it since here the rest of the world like yo what the what and she's like um would you want to say anything you want to close the casket at least no i don't work for the funeral home let them close it maya this is just a mock funeral and she's and she said you know what i'm not a part of this family let his baby mamas and his kids roll his ass on up out of here listen y'all listen but that's what i'm used to the rest of the world's like yeah you're not spoiled but that's the way we were yeah listen i can share the story i sat with her on the porch january 12th never forget january 12th and she was upset about something so real through my surprise birthday party won the party i said real don't throw me nothing i don't like parties i don't like groups i don't like large gatherings listen just give me a cigar give me some starbucks i smoke and i'm good so my oldest daughter wanted to have dinner so i went to dinner with the kids and sherelle so shirelle and i went to my mama house the next day and my mama asked well what did y'all do for his birthday and the real told her well his daughter wanted to have a birthday dinner for their dad and what's the first thing my mama said well why in the [ __ ] wasn't i invited yeah yeah yeah hurricane january 12th let me see what we're on the camera at january 12th when i woke up these are her last messages you can see if you got to zoom in this is this is her let me have it afraid you see it's still going it's still going listen i couldn't respond because if i respond it's going to add fuel to the fire but then i couldn't respond and i felt bad because a few days later i got the call that she had passed but this is the thing i had to stand up at the funeral and talk and i said anyone that's in here that had to deal with hurricane paul at any point in life stand up the whole church stood up everybody stood up so this is the thing i talked about the message and her custom ass out before she left this earth and if it wasn't i love you if it was a goodbye it wouldn't have been my mama and so she left earth the same way we always combative going at it and that in the sense it it gives me peace you know i mean it might sound weird to some people but that's what i'm used to and getting i love you and a hug it just it wouldn't fit right and for that reason is why you're a seven i'm good that's all that that's all we that's all we actually well no we can't actually be that but i'm good it's just it's it's different we all deal with things different obviously i've never lost a parent i lost my grandma my grandma who raised me in 2018 and then mom and i we like this but there's a there's a in between so obviously that's why that was a point of going on the show how can i rectify our relationship which we never had because you didn't raise me in a controlled environment where you can't run you can't go nowhere so we got to sit here we got to talk we gotta we got to get through this and it didn't work out she left the show early custer produces out and what we want to do was i wanted to get her in that environment and know what it felt like to actually have that mom yeah and what it's supposed to be like first of all i appreciate you sharing that bro and and second like i'm gonna be honest i just i just don't i don't know how i would deal with it i just feel like i'm so that my cheese mode that mentality of being a football player is just like different listen that macho that macho stuff was out the window listen when i got that call that macho stuff was out the window it was out the window yeah you know i i think it's like you had a seven no i i but i don't i don't know if it is because you are the seven and what you said was like you know i got i got family i got my daughters i gotta i can't be a five you know what i'm saying well i i had my moment at being a five and grieving and losing i was dead to the world for two weeks you know sitting there laughing going through pictures watching videos doing all that remembering the good times remembering the bad and laughing let me let me say this like a and this may be awkward i don't know how this is going to go but like when i gave my life to christ in 2011 playing for the dolphins you know that's when everything my words collided um i was at redeeming word christian center and um pastor lonnie the pastor ad son came up and he just hugged me so ty went to the front to the altar and he just hugged me so tight bro and i was like i never had a man hug me like that bro like it just felt different you know i'm saying like i love you i'm here for you you know what i'm saying so like bro i'm here for you i love you bro and you know i appreciate you sharing that and and whatever bro like oh we can hugs yeah yeah yeah come on for real here oh yeah like yeah we gotta do it like martin come on bro look afraid he still got that my cheese stuff going on come on respect but at the same time this is where the young right what the young boys need to see yeah feel me that's what they need to see man you good i'm good bro yeah don't grab my butt don't grab my foot i was talking to shannon give me a hug bro man that's crazy no bro i just think you just told the story just phenomenal bro like man she didn't she didn't play and again before who you were hey yeah we never did chef's name oh yeah come on chef so wait chef what we got what we got jerk shrimp jerk shrimp rice and peas rice and peas plantain plantains and soy ginger green beans and soy ginger i remember ginger i used to date a ginger so um i feel good man we just talked about checking in it got kind of emotional have you ever dealt with you know absolutely my brother 19 years that he passed but that was my first friend my you know like a year and six months apart he got hit hit by a car by a drunk driver and his birthday and the anniversary of his death it's never easy even when cars fly past me fast it's like my um legs start to feel like noodles cause i know he you know died from vehicular manslaughter but one thing i can say to you is that um we have amazing memories and i know for a fact that he's super proud of me you know so that makes a big deal and at least your mom got to see you know what i mean me being on good morning america a few weeks back my parents got to see that yeah my dad is 89 and my mother's 84. and for me i was like the i always say was the black sheep turn goat but yeah it was the black sheep turned goat and um it was an amazing experience for them to get to see that you know what i mean they actually call me today your boss is on tv i say he's on tv every day mom [Music] well tell him his skin looked good i said okay but for me to be able to make her proud after all these years i i mean and i'm sure your mom getting to see you and i'm you made her proud that's that's a big deal in itself you know what i mean appreciate you sir thank you you're welcome love joy love you too pastor reese one of our producers here uh close us out in prayer chef brought the food let's bless the food and you know obviously whatever your spirit takes you just thank you lord for using these guys continue to pour out your spirit in them and through them god that they will be used by you mightily in different various ways and i thank you father god for all that you're doing here um minister to those cracks those crevices god fill every void father renew purpose and vision god that they will continue to do what they've been placed on this planet to do and father bless his food let it be a nourishment to their bodies and i ask it in jesus name amen i don't love you yeah wrongfully accused we had to fight to get it pills that's why we write to get a deal he on the team he got to eat you know spike your skills fat riding for the fam you gotta light them that's why

Channel: I AM ATHLETE

Views: 1,546,948

Keywords: brandon marshall, brandon marshall highlights, brandon marshall podcast, i am athlete, i am athlete podcast, chad johnson, fred taylor, channing crowder, ochocinco, nfl, nfl 2021, nfl podcast, sports, sports podcast, superbowl, super bowl, football highlights, super bowl highlights, football, Cam Newton: I Can't Go Out Like That | I AM ATHLETE with Brandon Marshall, Chad Johnson & More

Id: iwBzCdYhB8A

Length: 37min 47sec (2267 seconds)

Published: Mon Mar 01 2021