Never LIE and Say You're a Lawyer...You Look Dumb. | Embarrassing Stories About Liars

hello my friends welcome to an episode of people claiming that their lawyers or that they know lawyers because they think it's intimidating when they don't get their way guys get ready to hear some great stories about liars using this line to try to get what they want and you guessed it they just end up looking dumb instead there are six stories in this episode today I hope you stay for all of them and subscribe for future videos let's get started this first story is titled do I need to get a lawyer for this I am a manager in a shoe store and deal with most of the returns and exchanges our policy is 45 days with the receipt for a return as long as they can be put back on the sales floor or even in exchange if they're not be able to put back out a man comes in carrying a pair of shoes no box no receipt and they look like absolute dog crap they were a hiking type shoe and it looked like he had hiked every trail in the entire state in them I asked if he had a receipt he said no I asked him when he bought them he said sometime last year in Texas well ok it's out of the 45 days so I can't do anything with it q the customer asking me what he should do and I said buy a new pair of shoes I can't do anything about those the man gets pissed and you can tell that he thinks the next line should work on everyone he looks at me dead in the eyes and says I know a lawyer do I need to get a lawyer for a pair of shoes I shrug and said I mean if you want to but I'm not returning or exchanging those have a good one he leaves the store in defeat I hate this place if you guys have tuned into my older episodes you'll know that I used to work at Quiznos making sandwiches I've had this exact line thrown at me twice once by an old guy and another by an old lady both threatening to get lawyers over a burnt sandwich I wish I was kidding like yeah go ahead and sue Quiznos I don't care this next one's titled I can't keep both y'all hear from my lawyer this happened over the span of a few weeks and it was finally all over yesterday I sell household appliances for a living it sucks but it's decent money a few weeks ago a co-worker sold a lady a washing machine for her new house she keeps it a few days then calls us saying it's making weird noises we send our tech out and he takes a look nothing's wrong with it no quote-unquote weird noises but we're a large corporation and try to make customers happy so we agree to swap it out for a new one the delivery guy gets there and starts taking the old one out and this is where all hell breaks loose the lady says why are you taking my washer that's mine I paid for it delivery guy says yeah but we're exchanging it for a new one so we take the old one that you claim is broken and swap it for the new one she then says that wasn't the deal I am keeping both for the trouble you all caused me and he responded if you don't let me take this one you can't have the other one you don't get both and then she says it she says I'll sue you guys for everything you've got I know a lawyer at that point the delivery guy says ok we're leaving the lady calls the store she's furious the first thing she says is I have a lawyer I'm suing you this is so unfair the manager tells her we've already talked to legal we've been told not to make contact with you you have to do everything through legal and corporate now sorry have a good day the lady's baffled and says what why you said you were gonna sue us that's all we needed to hear our legal department will be happy to take your case now contact the department with your name and phone number of your lawyer and they'll get you taken care of Thanks bye-bye the lady never called a lawyer never even called the legal department but yesterday she sends an email saying she would really appreciate the swap now and that she apologized for acting the way she did delivery laughs the store manager laughs she's not getting that I wonder how many times she's actually tried this on people and how many times it's actually worked her little scam of trying to get a free washing machine that she'll probably try to sell and pay for her other washing machine totally backfired this next story is titled when the lawyer steps in to make everything better I've worked a decade as a salesman at a stereo shop I've had hundreds of people threatening to sue but not a single one has a few standout and I was just reminded of this gem I sold a kid who was 18 or 19 years old a speaker mentioned it has manufacturers warranty against defects if it's not working we'll just swap it out the kid comes back later that day says the speaker doesn't work and he wants a warranty replacement I opened the box and the speaker has a gaping hole in it he was screwing it in slipped and he put the entire drill bit through the speaker cone it's obvious what happened I gave him a I'm sorry but this is clearly physical damage not a manufacturer defect I can't warranty this he debates and I hand him the warranty information from the manual he reads it and accepts his fate it specifically notes that damage due to improper installation or accident is not covered he walks out with his destroyed speaker taking the loss half an hour later his dad comes into the shop screaming that he's gonna sue us and that it's our responsibility to replace it how it has warranty and how we formed a verbal contract with our client that we'd swap it out if there was an issue dad mentions that he's a big-shot lawyer a few times during the tirade I said sir have you read that warranty information he replies no that doesn't matter you falsely told my son that he can bring it back under warranty I cut him off to say so you're not a lawyer then he says you think I'm lying are you accusing me of lying I then tell him lawyers always read a contract before debating it misrepresenting yourself as an attorney in order to obtain benefit for another is a criminal offense sir it says right here in the contract that we will not be honoring the warranty if it's caused by improper installation and it looks like your son had an accident I can see by the physical damage I pointed out the cameras and mentioned they have audio recording he went silent looked a bit shocked and walked out with his broken speaker muttering something about how he's never coming back and that we're losing a customer my coworker leaned over and asked is that true is it illegal to impersonate a lawyer I said damned if I know I'm not a lawyer hope he's right it is illegal to impersonate a lawyer but it's not illegal to say that you are a lawyer as long as you aren't practicing law and defrauding people and this is also coming from someone who knows nothing about what I just said but it sounds totally right this story's titled I'm a lawyer I know all about these things for those who don't know in the UK as of October 2015 any business with over 250 employees have to charge five pence for plastic bags so I work in a store in the UK that sells games accessories and things of that nature I had just finished serving a lady who was buying Sims 3 on the xbox360 for her daughter transaction was smooth said thanks and they left about 30 seconds later a guy comes in with the game presumably to be her husband the lawyer guy says got a bag for this I said sure it'll be 5 pence lawyer guy says no it won't I'll take one for free I'm afraid I can't since it's against the law and you technically be stealing we have to charge for bags he then says you can't charge me if the bag has the company's logo on it I'm a lawyer I know these things which is not true I told him I still have to charge him five pence and he says fine I'll have a refund then I don't want this game anymore nor your business I told him sure if you have the receipt I can process it through the till he then walks outside the shop and gives the game to his wife who had served previously she walks in and says is that five pence so I told her he wanted a refund and she rolled her eyes side paid for the bag said thanks and walked out the one thing that baffled me out of all of this is why would you boast to me that you're a lawyer earning God knows how much money while complaining about something so trivial as a five cent bag I only wish he had the receipt at the moment could you imagine him going back to his wife without the game honey where's the game you know here's the thing I went in there and he wanted five cents for a bag and I said no I'm not paying five cents for a bag so I got mad and returned the game and that's how divorce has happened my friends I think I don't know but that also sounds a little bit right this next one's titled refund my worn out underwear or I'll sue you a few years ago I was the manager at a store for a company that specialized in as seen on tv products as you can imagine it was a pretty fun job I was allowed and even encouraged to try out all the products so we could promote them better the downside however was some of the interesting customers that wanted refunds for the weirdest things one rather slow day I had just finished restocking the shelves when a customer came storming into the store the look on his face was comparable to grumpy cats if it was human I said what can I do for you sir he says these are defective I want a refund he puts a plastic bag down on the desk and took out a very ratty looking pair of Tommy Cooper boxer briefs for a bit of context the company return policy was basically exchange or store credits with a few refund exceptions based on manufacturer guarantees any clothing items were strictly final sale due to hygienic reasons any undergarments were definitely final sale the policy has always printed out on the receipt and we had an official 8 by 10 copy from the head office with the heading return policy set up in plain sight right next to the register I asked if I could see his receipt he handed it to me still scowling I looked at the purchase date and saw that the purchase had been made over five months ago it was also stamped final sale in red ink I said sorry boss but it looks like this was purchased five months ago not only that the items final sale it says right here I grabbed a highlighter and traced over the bold final sale stamp he says no this is your product so it's your responsibility I'm afraid not boss unfortunately we're not the manufacturer we're just the retailer and I'm afraid this isn't a defect it's wear and tear he then asked for the manager and I pointed to the name tag on my lanyard and said I am the manager sir and I'm sorry but that's our company policy he then says it he says I could sue you for this I know a lawyer if there was such a policy it legally has to be in writing for customers to see I'm losing my patience at this point it is sir right here and I highlighted it's on his receipt and here and I pointed to the Afra mention sign in front of him I watched his face get red as he looked from his receipt to the sign and back and then he says he'll be hearing from my lawyer he grabbed up his item and receipt turned on his heel and stormed out and I said okay take care now have a great day I watched his head sink into his shoulders as he stomped out the door okay first of all that's kind of gross bringing your five-month old used pair of underwear to exchange for a new pair oh my goodness this last story is titled I'm a lawyer and you're committing fraud how I met the customer that I'll someday invite to my wedding I was working the register one day when a customer comes up he's one angry customer one that I won't be meeting again or so I thought he's pretty much huffing and puffing before I can even say hi and something tells me that I'll know why in about two seconds our store is very focused on customer satisfaction and will do just about anything to get them happy so I put on a smile and greet him hi did you get an order number from one of my colleagues and he replies this is outrageous I shouldn't have to bring a piece of paper for the item that I'm buying this is unacceptable I said I'm sorry what happened his raised voice now is gathering some interest from other customers and he said I visited your website and the price there is ten dollars less than here in the store I told him that I'm very sorry that we probably haven't changed the price tag yet but the price of your order is the same as online he says that doesn't matter it's fraud I told them but the price for the product that you're buying is the same as the online price if it hadn't been we'd be more than happy to match that price I'm sorry for any inconvenience but this is the same price that you saw online he says that's not the point it was more expensive you should tell your manager you're committing fraud I said sir I am the manager and we always price-match anything you find online including prices from competitors but sometimes we have special deals online if you as a customer find the same product anywhere else and tell us we're more than happy to give you that price as a thank you for giving us your business if we did promise to have the exact same price in our stores as we do online but we don't that would be breaking marketing laws but it wouldn't be considered fraudulent he says not fraudulent are you serious I'm a lawyer I've driven here all the way from my house in insert rich part of town and don't you think I know it fraud is you have no right to tell me I'm wrong and I'll go to the papers with your fraud after this I just gave up he was on his way out the door still screaming about our fraud and I took a deep breath and I turned to my next customer fast forward two months I'm long overdue to meet my significant others family and as recently we've moved in together it's about time I'm nervous as hell because I'll meet them all at once and I don't know anyone there but it turns out I've met my significant others grandfather before ouch maybe he won't recognize you Opie and you can ask him what he used to do for a living and you can catch him in his fraudulent act of pretending to be a lawyer since he knows all about fraud right but that's it for today's episode of people claiming that they know lawyers when they don't I hope you guys found these stories as entertaining as I did if you haven't caught my last episode of people saying that they know the owner when they don't the videos are right here and they're highly entertaining as well also make sure you're subscribed so you don't miss any future videos and I'll see you guys in the next one

Channel: DarkFluff

Views: 105,654

Rating: 4.9299221 out of 5

Keywords: lawyer, fake lawyer, lying about being lawyer, reddit stories lawyer, ask reddit lawyer, r/, reddit stories about lawyers, reddit law, legal advice, reddit legal advice, r/legaladvice, reddit stories, reddit top stories, reddit top posts, reddit funny, reddit funny stories, embarassing stories

Id: apeG_7wpQ5A

Length: 16min 16sec (976 seconds)

Published: Wed Apr 15 2020