My Experience Leaving the Amish Church

welcome back guys so this is the second part of velva's testimony of our zoom meeting zoom call i don't know what it's called uh this last section if you didn't watch it go back and watch it find it on my channel it's about the oath that is uh that you have to make when you join the amish church that promise to god that you won't ever leave and you'll abide by their ordinances if you missed it go watch it um this part of it will be more about her experience as she was leaving the church and how how christ found her while she was still in the church right so uh i don't want to sit here and bore you so let's go ahead and watch that my name is velda johnson i am i'm married to jason we've been married for 17 years we have three boys my oldest is 15 i have a 13 year old and a six year old i've also been a homeschool mom for the last 10 years and i've done some part-time bookkeeping on the side but uh i grew up amish in the northern uh indiana a community in the old order amish church and so i was amish for about 21 years of my life i left when i was 21. when i left the i didn't leave the amish until after i joined the amish church and i didn't get to know the lord until after i was homage i mean after i joined the church so so yeah you were you struggled with depression you turned 16 and did you did the whole room spinning at thing and then you en and you joined the amish church trying to find relief which you found a little bit right but not and then you left like i think a lot of a lot of when people leave the amish church a lot of um amish people think it's because we want cars or tvs or electronics was that the case with you no so why did you leave why did i leave well i i just remember so when i met the lord you know think about the state of mind that i was in i mean i was in a completely desperate place i mean i was just and i think even during that time i went to i went to oaklawn i don't know for those that that may not know what that is it's it's a facility in the in northern indiana where um people go that have depression and who are and who are suicidal and so i went to oaklawn for about a week and still didn't find any answers you know and um nothing against nothing personal against oaklawn were they more medical like psychological yeah they did have you know they did put me on some medication so they put me on prozac and i couldn't my body couldn't handle it like i freaked out it was just the gospel or anything like that no no no and so um so i was desperate and after i joined the amish church then i started reading my bible that was when i started really getting hungry and being drawn to start reading the bible and i started reading it and i just remember thinking i don't even know what i'm reading i just didn't have any uh capacity to understand i just i didn't know everything i knew about the bible was what i was taught to believe about it you know i'd never read it for myself and so when i started reading it i just remember crying out kind of in my own heart i didn't tell anybody this but i just remember crying out and saying i just wish i had someone someone that could help me just kind of make sense of all this and i'm not kidding several weeks later i met someone and we started talking and i started sharing and opening up about the depression i was dealing with and she was a former or she had been amish before but had left and she was in bible school and part of her assignment was to mentor someone and take them through a some kind of a one-year biblical course and she asked me if if i would let her do that for me and i said absolutely i jumped on that i was just ready [Music] so i was she over she would come once a month and she would pick me up and we would go somewhere that where it was quiet and she would teach me the things about the bible and i'll never forget the first time she prayed with me like she prayed to the lord like just like you and i are talking like she prayed i mean she prayed in jesus name but she prayed and i was just so struck by that it struck me to the core because i thought praying to god was through this little book and it was all right it's great yes and so i just didn't know what to do with that and so um after a year of being discipled by her i ended up giving my life to the lord and i was still amish and i remember getting one of those little tape recorders you know the ones where they had the and then the headphones that had those black you know remember the old headphones the old walkman type of stuff yeah but i got a tape player so that i could listen to worship music really yes and i don't know if i got several tapes from her but it was back when they had the cassette tapes it wasn't the cds it was the cassette tapes and so i just remember i don't know if she gave me some or if i got some from somewhere else but i would just listen to those it when i went to bed at night that's what i listened to i fell asleep with worship music and i just learned through that i learned how to enter into god's presence and just you know he became my lifeline literally and so when i started considering after i went through that time of mentoring with my friend i began to start having the urge to leave and i was terrified i remember being so terrified of that thought just that thought terrified me and so i started um i remember just really being troubled by it because i knew if i left i knew what that meant it meant i was gonna lose everything it meant that i could lose all my friends and i did but um i recall one morning waking up and just being really troubled and this was weighing really heavy on my heart you know about leaving and i don't know if you knew this or not but i was supposed to get married before i left i think i remember i was i think it was like a month before our wedding when i left and so everything started crumbling i mean everything started coming down when i started considering leaving everything around me just felt like it was just caving in on me and just crumbling and it was at that time that the lord really became literally became my lifeline like he was what i held on to he was the hope that i needed at that time and so one morning when i woke up i was just struggling like crazy and i decided i was gonna put on my headphones put on a worship cd and i was gonna go out and go for a walk and it was dark still it was before anybody else woke up and it was dark and it was it had just snowed like it was a completely uh fresh layer of snow and uh the only light that i had was like the yard light that we had at our at our house i think it was close to the the horse's fence like there that was yeah yeah the chicken coop so um as i started walking and i started listening to the worship music i just the only thing i can explain was just i had this encounter where i felt the presence of god and experienced it like i had never experienced it ever before wow and when i walked back into the house after that experience i was changed my mind was made up that i was going to leave and i knew that there was something had happened i didn't really know what but i knew that my heart had changed and i knew that i had all the confidence in the world i knew that i knew that i was supposed to leave like it was something that was very strong the lord kind of pushing and gently nudging me in that direction and so i think all that that world kind of killed yours explained earlier how that was caving in on you do you think that was god or the lord trying to or do you think that was something else i think that the lord was preparing my own heart with all of that you see what i'm saying i had to lose all of that so that i would become women you see what i'm saying i had to become willing to obey him because he was calling me to leave yeah and i knew it but i didn't want to because i didn't want to deal with all the persecution or the whatever i was going to experience what's the worst part about leaving is it the unknown or is it hurting family and friends or losing family and friends gosh that's a good question i i think it was both mean obviously it was very difficult losing all my friends and being estranged from my family for a while um and i just remember that first year wow that year was brutal i mean it was just intense you know day after day it was intense but even in that intensity the peace of god kept me and i knew this like people thought i was crazy they just thought i'd lost my mind so even though like so even though you know you know i did some crazy things you know the depression really messed with me but i knew that the lord was changing me on the inside i knew it but i couldn't describe it to anyone or i couldn't even communicate it to anyone because they just thought i was nuts yeah so you definitely weren't leaving because you wanted electronics or cars absolutely not i kind of figured that way yeah so yeah and then you yeah keep going i kind of want to hear more of that yeah but see even when i left i didn't just up and leave it wasn't like some irrational decision i made one day and then just it took me like a whole year of just kind of weighing things up and down back and forth and i just felt i felt really torn because i knew if i left you know i would weigh my my decision i would say okay if i left you know i'm entering into an unknown world and i know that there's going to be multiple opportunities for me if i leave but if i stayed the chances are that i would continue to stay depressed and so for me it was really a matter of choosing to live [Music] i wanted to live i didn't just want to go through the motions i didn't just want i didn't want to be controlled i didn't want to be put in the box i wanted to live and i really you know after having all those encounters with the lord it really gave me a hunger to know him more i wanted more and i knew that was that i calculated that into my decision because i knew if i stayed i wouldn't be able to pursue that freely i would have to keep it under wraps and i would have to keep it hidden but i wanted to have the liberty to get to know god to learn more about him to become more free to live according to him and his ways you know what a man to learn and so it just felt like leaving was the better option for the things that i was desiring in terms of spiritual spirituality in the lord would you say you were saved before you left then yes did you say that earlier uh i don't remember if i said that or not but i was born again yeah yeah i remember i was definitely saved because i remember having moments when i would sit in my room and i would be reading the bible and i'd look and i read something and i i would compare it to what i was taught to believe and it was in completely i mean it was it was it was completely in conflict with each other and so i was just like what i was told this was the truth but but the bible says this so what which one is true you know and the answer is well the bible is that's where our final authority yeah solar scriptor yes um and so it was after that too that i began to when i left i think i started um desiring to go to a bible school that was when i moved to dallas okay that was four years after i lived i see you went to you stayed around that area for a while right after you so i stayed around in the northern indiana area for about four years after i left the amish i see i have a cool story though so i was uh looking for a job and this was actually before i left the amish so i was looking for a job because i was right there in that transition that time of transition from leaving and i had worked in the factory actually worked at jayco for many years and then i left the factory and i wanted to get something more low-key so i went up to town like in chipsy and there was a motel there and i wanted to work at the front desk so i went and applied for a job there and they told me that they didn't they didn't need me whatever when i applied for the job well it was during that time also that i moved out of i i left i moved out of home because things were getting so intense and it it it i just i needed to leave so that i could have more um just more time to freely calculate my decision and figure out what i'm going to do and that type of thing and this little amish lady took me in really yes she she said i mean she was a brave little lady she was she never been married and you know i knew that she was going to get a lot of i i figured she might get in trouble and she told me she didn't care she said i want you can come stay with me she gave me a room and she said i don't care what you decide to do this was before i left and she said i don't care what you decide to do whatever you decide to do you're welcome here anytime wow that was the lord and so that really helped me because then i could even more freely begin to start making my plans to to move forward and and change my dress get a car all that stuff and so this little old lady took me in so i was at her house one day and this this uh lady that worked at the motel came looking for me and she said yeah she said i know we told you that we don't need you but we really do would like for you to come and work for us because apparently they had moved from pennsylvania and they had become managers of this motel so they were there 24 7. and she said you know my husband and i decided we would like to go out once a week and we would like for you to come watch the front desk while we go out on a date every week and um and i was still amish at the time and this this couple literally became like just like parents to me really and really mentored me too and they were the ones huh they were believers yes okay and they were the ones that told me about the bible school in dallas and so i they gave me actually gave me like one of those tapes to listen to the worship music and i was just i just loved it because i mean i experienced the presence of god that's what i was wanting you know and i had visited several other bible colleges that were conservative and i just i just didn't i couldn't feel it it just wasn't i knew i wasn't supposed to go there but this this bible school i just really believed that something was in it like like it was something about it and i decided i was gonna pursue it and i did and so i visited the college the school i mean um several months before moving down here to go to school and it was just i mean i could see god's hand orchestrating every detail and every step along the way and you know what's really weird is that when i moved to dallas that couple at that motel that i worked for they moved back to pennsylvania yes i couldn't believe it it was almost as though they were they came they moved to indiana from pennsylvania i worked for them for several years and then they had complete completed their mission and moved back home because if it weren't for them i wouldn't have been able to you know i really don't think i would have come down here that's yeah that sounds like the lord's handiwork totally it's amazing whatever happened to the little amish lady no she she died several years ago so but she um her and i she was the sweetest little lady i'm forever grateful to her i'm telling you she she was like an angel of the lord to me that's amazing because that yeah a lot of people would get in trouble for doing that oh yeah but she didn't care you know but she um i it was really kind of cool because i uh i got to see her several months before she died so i got to say goodbye to her and i didn't know that there was anything wrong i think she died of a heart attack thank you guys for watching i really do appreciate you guys taking the time doing that make sure you hit the like button subscribe make sure you give ville a shout out in the comments she is working on a book which i can't wait to um read i'm excited for that uh with tons of more of her testimony in it she also has a facebook group called identifying cults and evil agendas i said go check that out there's tons of great great stuff on there when it comes to these cult churches when it comes to how satan is deceiving all these people so go check it out identifying cults and evil agendas and uh be ready for her book i'm excited thanks for watching we'll see you guys next time

Channel: the amish potato

Views: 10,278

Keywords: leaving, leave, church, false, cult, amish, mennonite, lose, walk, away, God, Christ, women, girl, believe, saved, redeemed

Id: BrLCSjHmYqg

Length: 23min 30sec (1410 seconds)

Published: Sun Mar 14 2021