♪ ♪ Man: "Mother Angelica Live!" brought to you from the Eternal
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opportunity!</i> (applause) Hi! Well, all of you out there and all of these wonderful people out here, I'd mention where they are from but I'll forget some and then that wouldn't be nice, would it? Well, the question of the week is from a letter I got. I have to change a few things because I don't want anybody to know who wrote it or where they're from. Anyway, this woman has lost several of her children to cystic fibrosis. And she said, "You say on your show that we are to try to be holy. What does that mean?" What does it mean? Right now it means I have to wipe my nose. (audience chuckles) Now, and the reason she says that is that so many people, she goes to prayer groups and she prays all the time and she said, "Is doing all I do, all that praying, is the road to holiness? "Is that the road to holiness?" She said, "God loved them more," that means people who pray, "since they devote so much time to prayer?" Now, let's answer a few things one at a time. In the first place, praying is a part of holiness. It's not the whole thing. Secondly, the Pharisees prayed a lot, didn't they? And they fasted a lot! And we know what the Lord said about this man who the poor sinner in the back and the Pharisee in the front of the temple and he said, "Oh Lord, I thank You that I'm not like the rest of men." So far, not too bad. "I fast twice a week," very good. "I give alms to the poor," very good. And then he looked back and he said, "Well, I'm happy I'm not like that man." He lost it all. So the Lord asked a question. He said, "Which one of them went home justified?" That means holy. And the one in the back, all he could say--he wouldn't even lift up his head to the temple, to the Holy of holies--he said, "O Lord, be merciful to me, a sinner." The man was Holy. Sometime a concept of Holy is a little mixed up, I suppose because we read the lives of the saints. That's wonderful. I encourage it. They ought to be our heroes, not these crazy rock groups. But you see, what they don't tell you in the lives of the saints is all their faults. It seems like that seems to be, you can't do that. They weren't perfect. St. Jerome had an awesome temper. Whew, boy! Awesome temper! He wrote terrible letters to St. Augustine, who didn't think he was a hot translator, you know. He was always finding fault with this translation of the Bible. And then there was Philip Neri, who played jokes. I can take a joke once in a while. Whew! I mean, he never stopped! (audience chuckles) If he went to Confession to him he'd give you odd penances. (audience chuckles) Like, one time this man went to Confession--I guess he was a little on the proud side-- and he made him walk through the village with a little dog on a leash wrapped in a fur coat (audience chuckles) in the middle of summer (audience chuckles) and the coat was inside out. (audience chuckles) I'd go to Confession to that priest once!-- (audience chuckles) and you can forget the rest of it. (audience chuckles) And even when he was very, very holy and he used to be elevated during Mass-- you know, he was so in ecstasy during Mass that the whole of him would just rise and people would sit there, watch him going up, and he hated that! And so he decided to do something that would prevent him from going into an ecstasy during Mass. So he put a squirrel on his shoulder and he walked into Mass dressed in magnificent vestments with a squirrel on his shoulder. Well, I don't know about you, (audience chuckles) I would have said something, done something or walked out. (audience chuckles) I would have said, "What's wrong with him?!" Well, he did it as a distraction, you see. It didn't work. He went up and the squirrel with him. (audience chuckles) The squirrel went with him. Then there was Brother Juniper, the wonderful, humble Franciscan Brother in the time of St. Francis. And this very prominent woman came in her carriage to the monastery looking for the holy man Juniper. And he saw her coming in a distance and he saw two kids playing seesaw and he got one off and put it on that side. With the two on one side, he got on the other side and he was going up and down. And so the woman stopped and she said, "Could you tell me who and where is Brother Juniper?" He said, "I am, Madam." He kept on. (audience chuckles) And she said, "Well, may I speak to you?" He said, "Go ahead." (audience chuckles) Well, she got so disgusted, she walked off at this idiot, but he was a holy man, you see. Sometimes I think we judge people by their actions most of the time. We say, "Well, that's all I have to judge by." Well, true, true. But Our Dear Lord told us not to judge. That's a part of holiness. Now, we're talking about holiness, a part of holiness is not to judge and to keep your eyes on Jesus. I would say to this lady, you're doing fine. Keep on praying. "What's a guilt-ridden Catholic to do?" Why are you guilt-ridden? Because some of your children died? You were not the cause of their death. You were like Our Lady, who had to see child after child die. That is nothing to be guilty about! Well, "I try not to think of my kids and how they suffered and died maybe 'cause I didn't pray enough." No, don't do that. Don't put that kind of burden on your heart. God permitted them to have this disease and He took them at the time it was best for them. You have to look at it, you have to look at it from the eyes of Mary, see. Our Lady didn't stand at the foot of the cross and strike Her breast and say, "What did I do wrong?" She knew what was going to happen to Jesus when She said, "Be it done to Me according to Thy will." (heavy sigh) "I am depressed. "We are to depend on God and get rid of other kind of crutches, so I hesitate; I hesitate to take medication for depression." Why are you depressed? Well, let me give you my little opinion. You have not really given your children to the Lord. What made Mary stand at the foot of the cross? Her total giving of Jesus to the Father. Why don't you do that tonight? Why don't you say, "Jesus, I give You my children. "From the bottom of my heart, I thank You for them. I thank You for the pain they had because they saved many souls." Now, you're not going to feel that way. It doesn't matter. You can feel good by eating a candy bar, you know. That doesn't matter. The words are enough because they come from your will. They come from the reality you really want to give. You continue praying. It won't bring your children back but it'll keep you close to Jesus. Go to Our Lady. She knows what it is. She has gone through every kind of pain, see, every kind of pain. And you had a real sorrow, just like Our Lady has a real sorrow or had one. But Her eyes were on Jesus. She kept Her eyes on Jesus. I have a little part of Scripture that I was reading today and I want to tell you what happened to the Apostles when they kept their eyes off of Jesus. These men were human! And they're portrayed as human! Sometimes our saints, you feel they were saintly from the age 3 (audience chuckles) and you lose hope, see. You don't ever lose hope with these men. Now, I'm going to just read some of this to you and then you're going to find out what mistake they made because you and I make the same mistake. Now, we're in Mark, Mark 6:30, if you got your Scriptures with you. It says, "He said, 'You must come away to some lonely place all by yourselves and rest a while.'" This is after John the Baptist's head just came off. They were depressed, depressed. And so the Lord said, "Come away and rest a while." Isn't it amazing that Our Dear Lord Himself felt it necessary to just kind of pull away from the crowds, from the politics, from the noise, from the Apostles themselves. Some time He would get up at dawn and go up a mountain and pray by Himself! And now He says to the Apostles, "It's time to pray." Do you know what a part of holiness is? Going somewhere, even if it's in your own, when the kids are in school, your husband's gone, (heavy sigh) just go a room some time and all by yourself and pray. Now, some of you say, "Yeah, my husband's retired! (audience chuckles) He goes to every room I go. (audience laughs) What do you do then?" Well, sit him down and say, "Let's pray." He'll either move, (audience chuckles) or go to the drugstore or something. (audience chuckles) If he stays, that's wonderful. Now, so, "There were so many coming and going that the Apostles had no time to eat." (Mother chuckles) I would find that very hard. (audience chuckles) I get grouchy if I'm hungry. That's just being Italian. That's all. (audience chuckles) So, "They went off in a boat to a lonely place where they could be by themselves." Have you got the picture now? They're already had it, they're already tired, they're irritable and they're hungry. You got all that? So they get in a boat, they're going to go some place where there are no people! But the people saw them going and he guessed where they were going and they got there before they did! They hurried on foot. So when he stepped ashore, don't you see, can't you see Peter saying, "Ah! (audience chuckles) "Ai, yi, yi! They're here!" Probably one of the other apostles said, "Yeah, I told you they'd come." (audience chuckles) Thomas would have said, "I told you we should have gone the other direction." (audience chuckles) Oh, this is really good. Now, you're going to learn about holiness. So, "Jesus stepped ashore and He saw the large crowd. He took pity on them because they were like sheep without a shepherd." Oh, we've got a little of that today, a lot of sheep. They have a wolf sometimes dressed like a sheep but they're not. They're not sheep. "And He set Himself to teach them at some length." Now, you see, they haven't eaten, yet. Don't miss the whole picture or you're going to miss a play. By now, it's getting very late. Now, all day long these men have not eaten. And the disciples came up to Him and said, "This is a lonely place." Isn't that funny how you put reasons for doing something when they're really your own? They weren't going up and saying, "Master, we're hungry." They said, "No, this is a lonely place, Lord. "It's getting late. Let's send them away so they can go to the farms and villages and buy themselves something to eat." Now, I'm sure they weren't thinking of themselves at all! Do you see yourself doing that? (audience chuckles) Do you? It's like fixing a meal just for you and your husband and he brings home two buddies (audience chuckles) and you look at him like.... (audience chuckles) Now, you got this picture of these irritable Apostles feigning charity for others while they themselves are hungry. And He says, "Give them something to eat yourself." How do you like that for adding? Pth! And they answered--now, they're getting smart-aleck. Did you ever know when you get hungry, you get smart-aleck? (audience chuckles) You come home, "Dinner ready?" "No." "Why not?" "Because I had to go downtown today." "How long is it going to take?" "An hour." "An hour! "You expect me to wait here an hour? Give me something to eat!" (audience chuckles) That's the disposition these holy men were in. And so they get smart-alecky. "Are we to go and spend 200 denarii on bread for them to eat?" (audience chuckles) Isn't that hysterical? First they wanted to get rid of the crowd. Now, the Lord says, "Give them something to eat." They see their own food going down the drain. "We've got to spend our money to feed this crowd?" And Our Lord never even answered them. It wasn't worth it. He said, "How many loaves have you? Go and see." Well, they didn't have any. They said, five, and two fish. So, "He ordered to get all the people together in groups on the green grass, sat them down on the ground..." Oh, here comes the... Oh, wait till I tell you this one. My asthma's bad, so you have to bear with me. "...in squares of hundreds and 50s." Let's see, how many here tonight? Quite a bit. Now, let's say all of our crew hadn't eaten all day today. I'm about to give the little bit they got away, and I say, "Look, put all these people in squares, squares, 50 of them at a time." Well, a square is like so. So this crowd come over here, this way. And then Peter says, "John, how many you got?" (audience chuckles) "I got 58." "Give me 8 over here. (audience chuckles) Over there." "Thomas, why are you taking them all over there? "I don't have enough over here." "Here, take some of mine." I bet somebody would say, "Why we got to sit in squares?" Wouldn't you ask me that? "Why do you want me to sit in squares? Can't you feed me the way I'm sitting?" And see, everybody's irritable. And now the crowd's irritable. "Then He took the five loaves and the two fish, raised His eyes to Heaven and said a blessing." Everybody's waiting. What's He going to do? Knowing a little about human nature, I would say 90% of them weren't waiting at all. They were thinking, "This is the craziest thing I've ever heard." A little kid cries out, "Momma, why are we sitting like this?" "I don't know." "Why are we...?" "Shut up, will you? I don't know." The Apostles are thinking the same thing! Now, what comes here? Here's one of the greatest occasions, one of the greatest miracles in the Scriptures. They're almost missing it. Oh, wait till I get to the end of this thing. "He gave a blessing, broke the loaves and handed them to His disciples and distributed them and He shared the fish. "They ate as much as they wanted." Five thousand. "They collected 12 baskets." Now, in another place, in St. Luke and Matthew, also John, it says that they had fed 5000 and they had seven baskets I think it was in another place, another miracle, of scraps and such. In another place it said there was tall grass there, tall grass. And the Lord said to them, "Pick up the scraps." Did you ever sit in tall grass? (audience chuckles) Did you ever sit in tall grass? Squish. Now, He didn't say, "Pick up the whole fish. "Picked up the untouched loaves." "Scraps." Do you know what a scrap is? You don't know what a scrap is? It's a third of a piece of bread, a half of a piece of bread. You know how kids eat bread? (audience chuckles) "Pick up the scraps," the Lord said, "and they filled 12 baskets." Do you know, my friends; this is one point of holiness we miss completely. Why? For the simple reason that we don't count the little things in our life as a point of holiness--tiny little things, the things that you do every day that are small and irritating, irritating, waiting for doctors, waiting for dentists, a tire blows up when you're in a hurry and you got to pull out the highway and nobody pays any attention to you--even getting out of bed in the morning. Some people are night people, some people are morning people, some people don't wake up till about 6:00 p.m. (audience chuckles) and they're raring to go. You woke up at 4. See, there are little things, going to a restaurant and the soup taste terrible. So you eat it. Going for a picnic and it rains--little things. And you see, the problem is, we don't keep our eyes on Jesus. We don't keep our eyes on Jesus. See, that's what happened to these Apostles. I want to just read you the rest of this little thing cause you're going to see yourself more and more. These were praying men. These were men who were next to Jesus, His Physical Body for three years and they had all of these irritating things that happen to them and they happen to you. They're occasions, they're opportunities. They're not, they're not time for impatience, lack of compassion or anything else. Here, "So they finally left. He made His disciples get into a boat and go ahead of Him." He could see they're at a breaking point. So He said, "Look, you go on the boat. You go on the other side. I'll meet you there. I'll dismiss the crowd." They had had it, all right? "After saying goodbye, He went to the hills to pray. When evening came the boat was far out in the lake and He was alone on the land." So here are the Apostles and here's Jesus way up here. "He could see..." Now, I want you to hear this. The woman who just wrote has the opinion, I think-- or feeling, more--that Jesus doesn't see her plea, that Jesus doesn't care. But that's not true. Listen to what happened. "He could see they were worn out with rowing and the wind was against them. And about the fourth..." Could you imagine! He watched there from the top of a hill and watched them row against the wind to the fourth watch! So obviously there's something very good for us when He doesn't answer-- but He still looks. He still sees. He still knows. Well, so, "He came towards them walking on the lake. He was going to pass them by." Here's another point of holiness. When you get disheartened and you get discouraged, when you think like this dear woman, that God had not heard your prayer or God is angry with you, call out to Him. See, He pretended He was going to pass them by. And all this storm and rain and the boat was sinking-- they were going in circles. He pretended. Why? He wanted then to say, "They cried out to Him terrified, 'Lord, save us!' "And then He said, 'Courage. It is I. Do not be afraid.'" Now, you see what this dear lady and all of you there and all of you here, when it looks like Our Lord has not listened, He's listened. When it looks like He is not seeing, He is seeing. And it looks like He's trying to pass to by, He isn't. He wants you to cry out, "Lord, help me! Save me!" And He said, "Courage. "It is I. Do not be afraid." You must recall these words when things get so tough and so impossible to bear. He sees you. Pray, call out to Him and you will hear, "Do not be afraid. It is I. Have courage." Now, this is what's so important for you and I. "He got into the boat with them and the wind dropped. They were dumbfounded." Now, why were they frightened? Why were they dumbfounded? Why were they afraid? Here's the answer for them, for you and me. "They were dumbfounded and afraid and they lost courage because they had not seen what the miracle of the loaves meant." Their minds were closed. What closed the minds of the Apostles to the miracle of the loaves? They were agitated about themselves--they were hungry, they're tired of the crowds. They ceased to keep their eyes on Jesus. Their eyes were on each other, their eyes were on the crowd, their eyes were on the people. They had already worked 24 hours and now they're at it again. See what happened? Don't we all do that? Don't we all just look at what's wrong and look at what's, all the horrible things? We take our eyes off of Jesus. And even on that lake, even on the lake, they couldn't believe it. He was walking on the water! "They had not seen what the miracle meant and their minds were closed." If you and I do not become holy, it will not be because we didn't have all the opportunities, all the time. We had time to pray, we had time to accept our crosses and make our sacrifices. If we don't become holy, it's because the distractions of the world-- the politics, the politicians, the trials, the problems in our family, the problems around us--we're just like the apostles. That's what occupies our mind 24 hours a day. We go to bed with it and we wake up with it. They failed to see Jesus. Their minds were closed. And Our Lord says that very thing about the last day. "And they will come to Me and say, 'When did we see Thee hungry and cold? "'When we did not feed Thee, when was it that we did not clothe You?" And He said, "I will say to them, when you did the least of these, you did it to Me." Their eyes were closed. They could not see the image of Jesus in their neighbor. Well, we're going for a little break so I can drink some good cold water and then we'll be back in just a minute with your phone calls. (applause) ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ (applause) Mother: Thank you. We have a call. Hello? Male Caller #1: Hello, Mother Angelica. Mother: Yeah, where are you from? Caller: I'm from Racine, Wisconsin. Mother: And what is your question? Caller: I would like you to pray for my son who took his life here Sunday. Mother: I'm sorry. Caller: He hung himself and if he could have your audience pray for him and then offer up your next Communion, I'd be very grateful. Mother: How old was he? Caller: He was 33, 33, Mother. Mother: I'm sorry. (heavy sigh) I would think that of all the ways a person can die, that would be the hardest for them and those they leave behind. Let me address you first. It is an awesome cross. The first thing you don't want to do is to put guilt on yourself. Even if there were differences or whatever, (heavy sigh) you must put it behind you. Say, "God, I'm sorry. "Maybe I should have done more, but I'm sorry. Forgive me." The second thing is to put a lot of love into the rest of your family, a lot of love, because there's a special sense of loss when someone commits suicide. It's the most painful kind of death. Third, do not despair. We know that suicide is self-murder. We know it's wrong. Whether it's personal or assisted, it's wrong and sinful, very sinful. But we do not know the inner workings of that mind. And so we must depend upon the mercy of God. We must depend on the mercy of God. We cannot presume, those who want to commit suicide, you cannot presume that if you do this you're going right to Heaven or God will have mercy of you. You can't presume that. But you and I who are the victims left behind must depend upon the mercy of God. One of the attributes of God, one of the wonderful attributes of God, is that to God all things are now. There's no yesterday and no tomorrow. When your son died, Our Lord saw your tears now. He saw your broken heart. He saw your pain. And I think He would give your son that one last chance to say, "I'm sorry, Lord. I didn't know You loved me." In today's society where we run after pleasure, we run after this, we run after that (heavy sigh) and then there are those who don't really build our faith but destroy it, when people are in dire trouble and despair they have no place to go if we don't tell them about Jesus. We're going to say a little prayer for you and for your son. "Lord God, You alone know all things. "You alone know whether this boy was totally responsible, that he knew what he was doing. "You alone know the heart and the mind. "And though he committed a grave sin, Your mercy, Lord, is great. "Lord, tonight we pray for all those who contemplate suicide, for the terrible risk they take of losing sight of the Holy Trinity. "Give them light to see this is not a path to take. "Give this man and his family the courage to accept this great cross. "Draw them closer to You because of it and use it, Lord, to make them holy as You are Holy. We ask that Mary Our Mother comfort them as only She can. Amen." All: Amen. Mother: We have another call. Hello? Female Caller #1: Hello, Mother. Mother: And where are you from? Caller: I'm from Miami, Florida. Mother: And what is your question? Caller: My son, when he was 14, had a spinal cord injury. Mother: Will you talk a little louder please? Caller: My son, when he was 14, had a spinal cord injury, and he's now 20 years of age and has completely turned away from his faith. And I pray constantly that he finds his way back to Jesus. Mother: Is he bitter? Caller: Well, he was left a quadriplegic and I'm sure that he is. Mother: Yeah. Caller: And where other doors have closed, others have opened for him. And I just see no return for him. And my prayers through Mary to Jesus are endless. Mother: Yeah, see, these kinds of things are being thrust on us, sometimes by the wrong decisions of somebody in a car on alcohol or drugs or maybe a car just gets out of control. Here is a treasure that... You know, a diamond was at one time a piece of coal. I don't think there's anything as ugly as a piece of coal and yet by pressure, constant pressure, unbelievable pressure this ugly piece of coal is crushed into a diamond. Well, a lot of people get that pressure. But it's only because Our Dear Lord wants to make something of them greater than anybody else. The blind will see things you and I won't see in His Kingdom. The lame will run, the deaf will hear music you and I won't hear. We will all be made new. I wish your son were listening and I could tell him about the day when he will get off of that chair and run all around Heaven and he will see God face-to-face. Oh, he will have years here in pain and misery but what is to come will more than make up for it. Tell him that. He may not want to listen because we're all people of the here and now. But the here and now isn't too hot sometimes, you know. We must all keep our eyes on Jesus--you and I and the whole world. If we don't, I don't care who you are or where you are, you'll go astray. We have another call. Hello? Female Caller #2: Hello. Mother: Where are you from? Caller: Yes, Mother, New York State. I would like to ask you, Mother--I have had many problems in my life and have not lost my faith. I always turn especially to the Blessed Mother. My question will be right now, Mother, what do you when your son, the most beautiful human being, comes to you and tell you that he's gay? Mother: Humm? What is your question, though? Your son told you he was gay? (heavy sigh) That's a cross. That's a cross, because it kind of leaves you in the air, doesn't it? You just don't know what to do. You love him, and yet you know what he's doing is very wrong. You must love him, and pray, pray. He won't listen to your words, perhaps. But with so much AIDS in the world and ah, the lung problems that are coming with AIDS, TB, so many things--but it is not beyond redemption. No matter what he is now, it's wrong, you must tell him that but you must love him. And that's what's so hard with all of us. We tend to hate the sin and the sinner. And it's hard to separate the sin from the sinner. St. Peter was a great sinner. He denied His Lord. And Our Dear Lord did not say to him, "I do not choose you. You disappointed Me." He still chose him. This young boy is just going in with the crowd because it's so accepted see, so accepted and you, they make you feel guilty. Number 2, what God calls him to is a celibate life unless he gets married. You have to tell him that. Whenever we misuse anything of God's gift to us, we destroy it. If you buy a new car and you put a nail in the tire, you're not going very far, you see. You can't take anything they make, anything you buy today and misuse it and expect it to last. It's the same with our body. Whether you drink yourself to death or smoke yourself to death or drug yourself to death or sex yourself to death, especially being homosexual, an active homosexual, the action is sinful. But he is still a man made to the image and likeness of God. Love him. Never let him think for a moment you accept his lifestyle. You cannot do that. That would be misdirected compassion. But love him and pray, pray that at some point in his life he will know it's wrong. It's against his own nature. And we will pray, too. For all of those who called tonight with such heavy crosses, know that your eternal glory and your eternal happiness will be greater, greater because of them. And know that even though many times we suffer unjustly, so did He. Many times when we look at the world and the world hates us because we are Christian, because we believe in morality and truth and doctrines and dogmas and faith--even though they hate us for that, we must dance for joy, for they treated Him the same way. We are not greater than the Master. And we must--you can learn from tonight from the apostles, from our callers, from each one of us listening--keep your eyes on Jesus. It may seem hard and a difficult road but the benefits are eternal, everlasting. And so tonight I wish you all great holiness. I wish you great graces from God that will enable you always to make the right choice--His choice, not your choice but His. We are all for God, so we are pro-choice, God's choice! (audience chuckles) We are for the Lord. We give Him what He asks for with a cheerful heart. Can I be happy over it? I would like to sit here tonight with clear voice and forget about cold water and asthma machines and cough drops slurping in my mouth but it is not the Will of God. So what am I going to do, go to bed? (audience chuckles) No way! I sit before you with small handicaps so we can all keep our eyes on Jesus. And one day we shall all be together in His Kingdom. And you'll come to me and say, "You know, I remember the day you talked about holiness. It changed my life around." And I'll say to you, "No, He spoke about holiness and He changed your life around." If you're not a Catholic anymore, come Home. God bless you. (applause) ♪ ♪
