'Looking after you the best I can' - Mark was diagnosed with frontotemporal dementia in his 40s

dementia is not something that you ever think about in your 40s [Music] Mark was an extremely intelligent person it's when you graduated isn't it in physics or Oxford he always would put other people first he'd go and help people so thoughtful in everything he did [Music] that's when we got married isn't it all our friends and family came you gave a really nice speech is it w for William yes yes when William was first born Mark was so excited he just absolutely loved loved into pieces we it was so lovely and I thought that was the you know our family and I thought this is going to be a really exciting chapter of Our Lives six months later that's when things really started to show that Mark wasn't well [Music] it wasn't Mark he was not showing the same affection and thought to other people and it just felt like he was becoming really detached from the family and he didn't want us anymore and that hurt and this was completely not marked so I knew there was something wrong and due to his age people just said it's anxiety he's stressed and he was 43 when he was diagnosed with frontotemporal dementia [Music] what are you saying that tell me sure sometimes you get a yes or a no and you can but most of the time I can't understand when he said a sentence it would start to tail off at the end and that was the beginning of it and then that tailing off just increased and until the whole sentence was whisper and then that whisper got quieter and quieter William doesn't have a daddy that we thought he'd have it's just a constant decline see him going down the slide mark he's like a different person it's like having a stranger his personality is so incredibly different unfortunately Frontier temporal dementia takes that away he needs help with everything just come here d-neck Mark come on let's do your neck and having a three-year-old as well is really challenging and it's balancing both their needs and trying to do the best for them both all the time and you end up forgetting about yourself I go to bed most nights absolutely exhausted it's a really unpleasant and nasty disease and it's it's just devastating it's take it's taken so many things away from us and our family and from Mark I'd like to think that Mark was happy with the choices I'm making for him it's really difficult because you're making them on your own and not as together um which we always did and we always made all decisions together would you like to sit down for me Mark and there was times I really wish I could just say look well what do I do about this I don't know what to do can you help me what you know what what's the best thing to do foreign but my little boy keeps me going he needs me Mark needs me and I've got to keep I've got to keep going I've got to keep going for the boys [Music] so we made the vows in sickness and in health when we got married and that's what I'm trying to do and I think if it was the other way around he would have done it for me if I had to say a vow now to Mark had to say I'm doing my best I'm really trying hard um to look after you the best I can goodbye everyone goodbye everyone glad that you were here goodbye everyone goodbye everyone glad that you were here [Music] glad that you were here [Music] foreign [Music] [Music]

Channel: Alzheimer's Society

Views: 110,828

Keywords: Frontotemporal Dementia, Ftd, Ftd dementia, Young onset dementia, Early onset dementia, In sickness and in health, Frontotemporal, Dementia, Alzheimers society, Dementia carer, Early onset, memory loss, diagnosis, Singing for the brain

Id: _e4t07Hc-jw

Length: 6min 21sec (381 seconds)

Published: Thu Aug 31 2023