>>> WE ARE BACK WITH A "TODAY" EXCLUSIVE AND A POWERFUL FEW CONVERSATION ABOUT WOMEN AND AGING IGNITED BY JUSTINE BAMEMAN. >> SHE HAS GONE ON TO A SUCCESSFUL CAREER AS WRITER, DIRECTOR AND AUTHOR. >> BUT IT IS A RECENT INTERVIEW THAT HAS HER FIRING BACK IN AN ONGOING DISCUSSION ABOUT HER LOOKS. >> WELL, WHEN YOU SAY, IS THERE BEAUTY IN AGING, AREN'T YOU REALLY SAYING, DO YOU THINK IT'S POSSIBLE FOR OTHER PEOPLE TO FIND AGING BEAUTIFUL? AND, LIKE, I JUST DON'T GIVE A [ BLEEP ]. LIKE I THINK I LOOK RAD. I THINK MY FACE REPRESENTS WHO I AM. I LIKE IT. AND, SO, THAT'S BASICALLY THE END OF THE ROAD. >> THERE YOU GO! OKAY. YOU HIT A NERVE, GIRL. YOU HIT A NERVE. YOU HAVE A LOT OF WOMEN SAYING AMEN. I MEAN, TO ME, IT SEEMS LIKE CONFIDENCE. WHEN YOU SAID, I LOOK RAD. YOU'RE LIKE, I LOVE ME. I LOVE EVERY PART OF ME. I LOVE THE WAY I'M AGING AND CHANGING. IS IT REALLY ABOUT CONFIDENCE? >> WELL, I THINK IT'S REALLY ABOUT FEAR. BECAUSE I THINK THAT EVERYBODY HAS A COMPLETION TO THIS SENTENCE. I'M AFRAID IF PEOPLE I LOOK OLD THEN THEREFORE. FOR PEOPLE IT IS DIFFERENT THINGS. SOME PEOPLE THEY WILL NEVER GET A JOB OR NO ONE WILL LISTEN TO THEM OR WHATEVER. AND THAT FEAR -- MY POSITION IS THAT FEAR EXISTED BEFORE YOUR FACE STARTED CHANGING. SO IT IS AN OPPORTUNITY TO TAKE CARE OF THAT FEAR SO IT IS NOT LEADING YOU AROUND BY THE NOSE AND MAKING YOU MAKE OTHER DECISIONS THAT ARE NOT YOU, TAKING YOU OFFTRACK. >> YOU HAVE BEEN AN ACTIVIST ABOUT THIS FOR WHILE. >> I AM NOT AN ACTIVIST. >> WHAT ARE YOU? >> I GOT MYSELF ON THE OTHER SIDE OF WHAT THAT FEAR WAS FOR ME IN PARTICULAR, AND I JUST AM SHARING WHAT WORKED FOR ME. THERE IS LOTS OF WAYS TO GET THERE. BUT FOR ANYONE THAT WANTS TO GET FREE -- >> THAT'S WHAT I WANT TO ASK YOU ABOUT BECAUSE IT WAS A JOURNEY FOR YOU, TOO. IT STARTED WITH A GOOGLE SEARCH. CAN YOU TELL EVERYBODY ABOUT THAT? >> WHEN I WAS WRITING MY BOOK, YEAH, I HAD TO FIND SOME INCIDENT THAT HAD HAPPENED WITH ME. SO I DID THIS SEARCH. AND THEN -- IN THAT BOOK THERE IS A CHAPTER WHERE PEOPLE WANT TO SEE WHAT CAME UP FOR ME, WHAT THAT PROCESS WAS. WHEN I GOT TO THE OTHER SIDE OF IT, I THOUGHT, WHAT IS IT ABOUT SOCIETY AS A WHOLE? HOW DO PEOPLE GET THESE IDEAS THAT A WOMAN'S FACE IS BROKEN? >> IT RESONATED WITH ME BECAUSE I REMEMBER READING A COMMENT ONCE ON SOCIAL MEDIA THAT'S LIKE, WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU? AND I WROTE BACK, I AGED. >> YEAH, YEAH. >> THAT'S WHAT HAPPENED TO ME. >> YEAH, LIFE HAPPENED. >> I AGED. >> HOW DO YOU LIKE -- >> WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN? >> I DON'T KNOW. I'M A MORE SUCCESSFUL AND EXPERIENCED, YOU KNOW, HOST OF A NATIONAL TELEVISION SHOW, THAT'S WHAT HAPPENED TO ME. >> YEAH. >> WHAT HAVE YOU BEEN DOING? LIKE WHAT IS THAT EVEN SUPPOSED TO MEAN? >> IT'S RIDICULOUS. I DO AGREE. >> ALSO, THAT PERSON THAT'S TELLING YOU WHAT THEY THINK OF THEMSELVES. >> YEAH. YES. >> WHEN THEY LOOK IN THE MIRROR, THAT'S WHAT THEY SAY ABOUT THEMSELVES. THEY'RE TELLING YOU ABOUT THEMSELVES. THEY'RE NOT TELLING YOU ABOUT YOU. >> I THINK THAT'S INTERESTING. SO HOW, EVEN THOUGH WE KNOW THESE THINGS AND WE THINK THEY'RE SILLY AND RIDICULOUS AND THEY ARE TALKING ABOUT THEMSELVES, ET CETERA, SOMETIMES IT IS STILL HARD TO PROTECT YOUR HEART FROM THINGS LIKE THAT, EVEN IF IT COMES FROM A MEANIE OR FROM SOMEBODY ELSE. HOW DO YOU FEEL WITH THAT? >> IT COMES FROM FEAR. NOT TO PUT YOU ON THE SPOT, BUT WHEN THEY SAID, WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU. IT'S LIKE WHEN I HAD THAT SAME SITUATION, RIGHT? THEY SAID HORRIBLE THINGS. I WON'T GET INTO IT. >> WHAT IT IS? >> I DID A -- THE FEARS THAT COME UP. SO WHATEVER FEARS COME UP. LIKE IF SOMEBODY SAYS, WOW, YOU HAVE REALLY AGED. FOR THE PERSON WHO IS BEING TOLD THAT, IF THEY GO, OKAY, I'M AFRAID, THEN, FOREVER X IS GOING TO HAPPEN. >> RIGHT. I'M GOING TO LOSE MY JOB. I'M GOING TO LOSE MY MATE. >> WHAT IF THEY JOURNALED OR SPOKE TO THEIR THERAPIST OR BEST FRIEND ABOUT THAT PARTICULAR FEAR BECAUSE IT DOESN'T HAVE ANYTHING TO DO -- THE OPPORTUNITIES IN LIFE ARE STILL GOING TO COME TO YOU REGARDLESS OF YOUR GENDER, YOUR HEIGHT, YOUR SKIN COLOR, THE STATE AND AGE OF YOUR SKIN. YOUR LIFE DOESN'T CARE ABOUT ANY ABOUT THAT. THE ONLY PERSON THAT WILL X YOU OUT OF THOSE OPPORTUNITIES IS YOU. YOU ARE GOING TO SAY, I CAN'T. I'M TOO OLD OR, NO, I DON'T LOOK RIGHT. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS. >> YOU KNOW WHAT? I KEEP LOOKING AT KIDS WHO ARE YOUNG IN THEIR 20s, AND THEY'RE ALL TRYING TO CHANGE WHAT IS ALREADY YOUTHFUL AND BEAUTIFUL ANYWAY. HOW DO YOU SPEAK TO THAT GROUP OF PEOPLE WHO ARE SOMEHOW TRYING TO CHANGE? >> I THINK THEY ARE TRYING TO AVOID -- I DON'T EVEN THINK THEY'RE TRYING TO AVOID LOOKING OLDER. I THINK THEY'RE TRYING TO AVOID FEELING LIKE HOW THESE OLDER PEOPLE ARE REPRESENTING THEIR FEELINGS. THEY SEE ALL THESE OLDER PEOPLE GOING, OH, I'VE GOT TO CHANGE THIS. I'VE GOT TO CHANGE THAT. I'M SO AFRAID. I THINK THE YOUNGER WOMEN ARE GOING, I DON'T WANT TO FEEL THAT. I DON'T WANT TO FEEL TERRIFIED MY FACE IS GROWING OLDERMENT I'M LOOKING AT PEOPLE LIKE ISABELLE BARRETT AND ALL THIS. I WAS LIKE, I CAN'T WAIT. STILL ISABELLE I THINK IS AWESOME. BUT I WAS LIKE, I CAN'T WAIT TO LOOK LIKE THAT. >> YOU FELT LIKE THAT. >> I COULDN'T WAIT TO LOOK LIKE HOW I -- I COULDN'T WAIT TO BE SOMEWHAT SIMILAR TO WHAT I WAS GETTING FROM THAT. YOU KNOW? THEY WERE JUST RAD, RIGHT? >> COOL. >> SO NOW I'M LIKE -- ANYWAY, IT IS AN INSIDE JOB. AND I WOULD SAY TO ANY YOUNG WOMAN LIKE YOU'RE BEING LIED TO. WHO IS MAKING MONEY OFF OF THIS? >> UH-HUH. >> YOU'RE BEING LIED TO. AND YOU'RE BEING TRICKED OFF YOUR PATH. >> UH-HUH. >> YOUR PATH IS -- YOU HAVE SOME AWESOME THINGS COMING YOUR WAY. JUST STAY ON YOUR PATH AND JUST RIDE OUT WHATEVER FEARS COME UP IN YOU ABOUT, I'M AFRAID IF PEOPLE THINK I LOOK OLD, THEN THEREFORE, FILL IN THE BLANK. WRITE ABOUT THAT. DEAL WITH THAT. THIS ISN'T THE THING. >> YOU WERE ON "60 MINUTES AUSTRALIA" AND YOU GOT A DM. >> YES. I GOT A DM. IT WAS FROM THIS WOMAN, AUSTRALIAN WOMAN, I ASSUME, WHO SAID I NEVER REALIZED WHAT AN IMPACT THIS CONVERSATION WAS HAVING ON YOUNGER WOMEN, SHE SAID, UNTIL MY DAUGHTER CAME IN FROM THE OTHER ROOM AND SAID, HEY, DID YOU GUYS SEE THAT? HER 16-YEAR-OLD DAUGHTER. SHE SAID IT WAS GREAT. NOW I'M NOT AFRAID OF GETTING OLD. I WAS LIKE, OH, MY GOD. IF IT'S ONE PERSON THAT'S NOT -- IT'S SILLY. I'VE NEVER BEEN SMARTER. I'VE NEVER HAD MORE CONNECTIONS. YOU KNOW, IT IS LIKE WHEN YOU ARE YOUNGER, YOU KNOW THE DOORMAN OF THE NIGHTCLUB. WHEN YOU ARE OLDER, YOU KNOW THE PERSON THAT OWNS THE BUILDING. YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN?
