Jonathan Roumie – Testimony on Divine Mercy – Mercy Night

thank you so much good evening how about a hand of a round of applause for danielle rose what a beautiful boys she has huh hand me my weapon i'll leave that right there well good evening again thank you so much for having me here it's uh it's such a humble honor um i'd like to touch on two subjects tonight that have become consistent anthems for me uh subjects which i believe are inextricably linked one is humility and the other mercy i particularly have a lot to share on the topic of mercy because god has been so merciful in my own life but for the pair of virtues i can certainly speak for myself in saying that i could al always benefit with more helpings of both of those qualities humility and mercy and how life-changing for the world at large would it be if we as a species embraced those concepts with open arms with the same humility and mercy that christ opened his arms for us on the cross according to saint augustine humility is the foundation of all other virtues hence in the soul which this virtue does not exist there cannot be any other virtue except in mere appearance on the subject of humility saint faustina said the soul's true greatness is in loving god and humbling oneself in his presence completely forgetting oneself and believing oneself to be nothing because the lord is great but he is well pleased only with the humble he always opposes the proud in her visions regarding divine mercy jesus himself said to saint faustina proclaim that mercy is the greatest attribute of god all the works of my hands are crowned with mercy and finally the church does not exist to condemn people but to bring about an encounter with the visceral love of god's mercy pope francis said that so how has divine mercy played a role in my life well to answer that i must examine a few highlights over the last 20 years of my life highlights not every moment of the last 20 years where god has pretty blatantly used signs to knock me over the head to communicate his mercy and in looking back i can see that there have been three stages if you will of development in my own spiritual evolution stage one being prayer everything in my life has started with prayer including my life my parents prayed for me they were faithful and are faithful people they they prayed often they prayed with their children and for them and for all of their family and friends as i referenced earlier the family that prays together stays together was a phrase that my father used liberally in our home and we did that stuck with me but i never know knew who actually said it until about seven or eight months ago i discovered it was father patrick payton the rosary priest who was the man who popularized the term decades ago so i was baptized raised with the faith and held onto it all through my life through prayer i remember my grandmother my irish grandmother coming over from ireland every summer and we would we would kneel at our bedside my sisters and i and learn prayers and and repeat them and those prayers stayed with me my entire life prayer was colloquially omnipresent spontaneous it was always in gratitude but always there especially amidst amidst the trials and tribulations the foibles and follies and the waxing and waning episodes in my life and in my mid-20s there was a lot of waning going on um i was figuring out my who i was what my relationships meant to me where my career may or may not go but prayer was a constant it never stagnated it was always this divine dialogue with god sort of a coffee talk between god and myself during one of those waning moments i developed an interest in divine mercy my father had discovered it some 15 years earlier i didn't know much about it but my interest was piqued probably due to the image it was striking jesus one hand in blessing the other to his heart a red ray and a white ray in his priestly garment i i didn't know the origins of it i knew nothing about it it was just kind of mysterious looking i didn't even know that jesus had said to saint faustina i want the image of divine mercy to be solemnly blessed on the first sunday of easter and i want it to be venerated publicly so that every soul may know about it i just like the image so i decided to pray the divine mercy chaplet with the image and i don't know about you but there's something about praying with an image or an icon or a statue i was never sure if it was just because it was comforting maybe it felt like it was you know additional access to god's presence or maybe it was because i identified being an illustrator myself i just liked portraits and drawings and it was something that anchored me in my prayer but i wondered why the inclination to pray with images and icons was so strong why was it so important to me and and to millions of folks in the catholic and eastern practices and i looked it up encyclope encyclopedia britannica says on the topic of icons icons are considered an essential part of the church and are given special liturgical veneration and they serve as mediums of instruction to the unders excuse me they serve as mediums of instruction for the uneducated faithful according to iconographer marek jarnecki he says icons are a vision of reality that uses art to open the window to heaven and i believe that film and television also carry that same power the divine mercy image i was familiar with was by the artist adolf hila which i believe is the image that's over right over there on the other side of the altar it was not the original that was painted by kazimirowski but in my own youthful artistic snobbery i wasn't exactly compelled by that image images were important to me if if it was if religious art wasn't made by michelangelo or caravaggio or bugaro i was less compelled to open the window to heaven if that makes sense but god would use my ignorance and my pride to teach me humility through what i believe to be a minor miracle using divine mercy how well some of you may or may not know my history so i was born in hell's kitchen in new york city i was baptized greek orthodox and when we were old enough my sisters and i to go to school we moved to the suburbs of new york and long island there weren't a lot of greek orthodox communities out there my dad being from egypt grew up going to catholic school if you went to public well if you if you were greek orthodox if you're a christian you didn't go to public school that was run by the islamic states or you went to catholic schools so he was raised with the catholic faith my mother is from ireland roman catholic so she was very very comfortable going to catholic church so since there were not very many greek orthodox communities we very easily transitioned to the nearest catholic church which was fine it was liturgically sacramentally they were compatible with each other i didn't have to convert so i made my first communion and my confirmation as a catholic so early 2000s many of my greek orthodox cousins were starting to get married have kids around the time that i was introduced to divine mercy so i spent a lot of time in the orthodox liturgical environments which for me was nostalgic the beauty of the greek orthodox icons the thick aromatic clouds of frankincense smoke wafting among the candlelit altar transported me to this meditative state of holiness whenever i prayed in this environment it just felt holy so when i started preparing to pray the chaplet in my stark one-bedroom apartment in queens staring out a little two-dimensional booklet with a badly printed image of divine mercy i was it wasn't the same needless to say so there was no catalyst to this divine deeper connection for me now i have since come to appreciate hilah's rendition for what it is it's a catalyst to prayer and more importantly it's a lasting symbol of god's ocean of mercy but at that time my spirit had not yet evolved i needed the instruments to help me to go deeper i had not the sensitivity neither in my faith nor in my art to connect to god in the same way on my own so with this recent reintroduction to the orthodox liturgy i thought to myself wouldn't it be cool if there was a divine mercy icon that i could hang in my little apartment made in the style of a greek orthodox icon that would be awesome i mean if if that existed i'd be really holy you know how many times have i used excuses to side side step prayer because of something like that but that was that was my my prayer my ask if you will wouldn't it be perfect if there existed a divine mercy image in the style of a greek orthodox icon i'd never seen one three days later this showed up outside my door on top of the mailboxes of the dusty first floor lobby of the building in which i lived if you can't see it because it's pretty small it is a greek orthodox image of the divine mercy image it's a greek orthodox icon of the divine mercy image now people left cds books cassette tapes for those kids ask your parents what they were tchotchkes all sorts of stuff but in the 10 years i lived in that apartment never once was there a single religious item never once was there an orthodox style religious item and certainly never were there any orthodox style divine mercy icons yet three days later after i asked for one there it was i double checked to see if there were cameras in the lobby i was sure i was being punked i'm like what's going on here somebody was listening it's the government i know it but i grabbed this icon as fast as god grabbed my attention in that moment and it's been with me for 17 years praise god and so this this image has become the center of my divine mercy prayer time those of you who have prayed on instagram with me will recognize it 10 years later fast forward 10 years later i was auditioning for a play i told that story in this skype audition to director leonardo di filippis who was directing a one-woman multimedia traveling show about the life of saint faustina and it was called faustina messenger of divine mercy i remember i told him the story and his eyes got real wide and he was really quiet for a second and he said i mean clearly you're the guy for this role and the role was to play jesus for my first time ever he asked if i'd do it and i said yes then this would be a first for me playing jesus uh we would film the scenes that would be shown during a live performance which would be interactive for the actress playing faustina who was maria vargo so she would be here by herself there would be some set pieces some lighting and then a screen and on the screen they would project scenes of all the other supporting characters including the visions that faustina had with jesus which i played we were up in washington state for three days filming it was a deeply moving experience for me and extremely challenging because there was no time to rehearse we had mountains of dialogue i was cast pretty close to where they were going to start filming and it was too much to memorize on the fly almost the entire project necessitated teleprompters for everyone involved because of the intense schedule but we adapted and god used to play to bring the story of his mercy to tens of thousands of people through hundreds of shows and having attended a few of the live shows myself because obviously i was recorded so i could when the show appeared in southern california i could go and attend and watch and just see people's reaction i'd never seen people react to you know faith-based material live before and it was it was pretty astounding the seeing the impact of my art directly affecting people on both an emotional and the spiritual level was eye-opening professionally and life-changing spiritually for me there were these moments where jesus smiled and was almost playful with faustina and the response to these early depiction of jesus's humanity was tremendous we see that echoed in the chosen there are are many many moments of jesus's humanity that connect people to him instantaneously so god would continue to call me to use my gifts directly to serve him six months after i filmed faustina i auditioned for dallas jenkins the creator of the chosen for a short film called the two thieves about the two thieves crucified along side christ i read for the penitent thief what a character like a lot of the um extra biblical material in the chosen people here have seen the chosen anybody here hasn't seen chosen how many of you okay great so there's a lot of stuff that takes place in between scriptures to fill out these stories because sometimes we know very very little about these characters there's two lines and then you're left to deduce the rest based on scripture archaeology you know what the culture was at the time so this penitent thief right there was this great it was about how did the penitent thief get to be on the cross so it was an extra biblical story who and he had a great character arc he had father issues it was dramatic i loved it i had a great audition i felt i nailed the emotional scenes i was pumped i felt pretty confident and then a few days later i was called back to read for jesus i was slightly disappointed for two reasons the first was that clearly my initial audition didn't go as well as i thought it did and secondly jesus only had like five lines son of god five lines yes it was the crucifixion but in my mind i'm like i'm sure there's some monologue that you know dallas can write you know somewhere you could cobble it together no where was the ark and god's looking at me like son if you don't quite see the ark of humanity in those five lines we've got a lot of work to do here but of course dallas called and said i want you to play jesus will you do it i said yes those of you that have seen the chosen can imagine me five years later flipping through episode one of the chosen to see all the lines that jesus does not have it's not is this the right i have the right script i have the right script is he just note page 53 55 oh okay finally he's here oh man jesus only has like five lines what the well surely episode two let's just get episode two out and nope he's not there either where is he not even there and then the shortest sentence in all of film history and jesus winked those of you who have seen episode two know exactly what i'm talking about dear lord please let episode three have some sort of picture oh thank you okay we're good we're good i can do the show okay there's more there's more st jude i'll get to that ten bucks after mass thank you for making this work pride and humility were the lessons i was being taught all throughout my career and my spiritual life saint augustine said it was pride that changed angels into devils it is humility that makes men as angels thus the two thieves would begin a friendship and working relationship between myself and dallas jenkins that is now six years on i never thought i'd play jesus more than once in my life and then with dallas maybe twice but i was open because i was developing spiritually the more i studied jesus the more i spent time with him and his heart the closer it brought me to him the faustina project in the short films i would do with dallas over the next three years would put me firmly on a path to christ in ways i never anticipated divine mercy would become a part of my prayer prep for playing christ a year after the two thieves faustina actress maria vargo asked me to participate in a long-standing production of the living stations of the cross in santa monica once more i said yes i would play jesus in three projects in just 16 months god was clearly trying to tell me something this real this realization precipitated the next stage of development in my spiritual evolution stage two expectant faith when i combined expectant faith with prayer i found myself in the midst of a more deeply committed dialogue with god it wasn't just talking coffee anymore we were moving into lattes the journey to performing christ's passion during easter was nothing short of transformative for me the transcendent nature of attempting to dwell as jesus in peace amidst the brutality of his passion can hardly be described the following year i was asked to co-direct and co-produce the production with ms vargo which would eventually become the last days the last days became the inaugural project of our newly established non-profit media company called gk chesterton entertainment and for those who are interested i actually have copies of that show the last days with me downstairs you all are the first to actually even see the dvd they literally just shipped right here we've never produced a dvd before so i'm really excited so daily mass praying the divine mercy chaplet daily mass when i could because i also had to work confession receiving the eucharist saying the rosary all of those became essential parts of directing acting producing and the modus operandi of any and all issues that seem to arise and boy let me tell you when you're working for jesus issues arise as many of the folks setting up for tonight can attest to uh you know it's uh it's as if something or someone doesn't want us to succeed in promoting the gospel i wonder who that could be but through prayers and expectant faith i credit all the doors all the doors which opened for us for that particular production including the contributions which came through discounts companies were giving us bills that were able to be paid and even paying actors who for years in doing the the last last days of the living stations were just doing stuff voluntarily for free we wanted to pay people to honor their time and their talent this treasure that they were giving us impossible challenges through prayer became divine accomplishments and i knew that as a company we would and were experiencing god's unique providence even though even though it didn't always happen in the way that we had conceived it and the graces there were so many transformative graces the one that sticks out the most occurred during the production of the last days i believe it was 2018 easter where at the beginning of the show jesus comes out at the at the entrance to the church and walks down the center aisle and i acknowledge i acknowledge people so i come out and start walking down the aisle and about four or five rows in this woman starts to sit stand up from her seat she's a little older but she she just calls out jesus jesus and i said oh what's is this a plant what's going on here so i started to walk over to her sorry and she had this uh she had this look in her eyes this deep deep sadness and this longing and i just went over to her and this is all in us 10 seconds i looked at her right into her eyes and i just hugged her because that was what the spirit was telling me to do and she immediately began to sob in my chest the following week during a recap before our next performance is where we discuss what went well what didn't go well one of the cast members stood up and told me that that woman was a friend of hers who had recently just lost her adult son in an accident and then upon seeing me coming down the aisle as jesus she just was convinced like the woman with the 12-year hemorrhage that if she just touched my cloak that she could connect to the soul of her son humbling to say the least saint vincent de paul said the most powerful weapon to conquer the devil is humility for as he does not know at all how to employ it neither does he know how to defend himself from it god's mercy flows through humility following that performance one of the most profound moments of god's mercy in my own life would be would arrive during the height of my struggle as an actor eight years in l.a which would inevitably lead to stage three total surrender combined with stage one prayer and stage two expectant faith there was no denying that the lord was doing a work of preparation in me to maintain the coffee talk analogy stage three is what i would consider the extra-large triple shot spanish latte with oat milk dairy allergies what can you do stage three is where god got real with me or more accurately i got real with god with all the time i'd spent playing christ my faith and prayer life were very active but not more active than me what do i mean by that i mean i was doing everything within my power to make my career happen i prayed i had faith i had expectant faith even but i was also juggling seven yes seven different side jobs at that point the deception was i didn't have a choice i had to work no i didn't god's like hey let me help no no i got this guy i'm doing everything i'm sending auditions i'm sending emails i'm looking for ways to uh god let me let me help you no i got this i got listen i got this okay you got this and i tried to get it i tried to do it all myself seven jobs ride share driver cater waiter for three companies brand ambassador means you advertise a bunch of stuff dialect coach i do different dialects special needs assistant i still do that storyboard artist and i even gripped the stands that are set up to shape the light on a film set or movie set i put those up occasionally very occasionally i book a voiceover job or every couple of years a tv acting gig but i wasn't making a living in la and i was struggling it's like the more jobs i took the less money i made i said how does that math work how does that even work when it came to my career i had one prayer for eight years in los angeles i said lord if there's anything else you see me doing if there's any other way that you wish me to serve you outside of being an artist please tell me what it is because this is really hard silence the desire never left to be an artist to act it only increased the opportunities were virtually non-existent i couldn't understand it and i couldn't take it anymore i hit my limit so on a saturday in may i woke up in debt hundred dollars overdrawn twenty dollars in my pocket so zero really and no food in my house so i did what i always did and i dropped to my knees in prayer but this time was different this time i was operating from a place of absolute brokenness and i said lord i've done everything you've asked me as far as i can tell i've asked you to show me something different if that's what you've called me to do you haven't i thought you know lord you help those who help themselves that's what i've been doing seven jobs is that not helping myself what am i doing wrong what what how much more can i help myself and i'm still struggling in a way i never thought i would be at this point in my life so if you want me to keep going here lord you need to step in because i physically can't do it anymore okay i'm surrendering it all to you because you said your yoke is easy and your burden is light so here you take it lord i'm giving you all my problems and i'm stepping back man i surrender and for the first time in my life i actually did i gave up all my expectations about how i thought my career would go how i thought i'd make money how i would get paid where the food would come come from excuse me and i just i simply surrendered body mind and spirit i remember feeling this sense of relief you ever feel that it's like not my job it wasn't my problem i didn't have the answers but now it didn't matter anymore because god our god is mercy our god is compassion our god is faithful to his word and hears the cries of the poor and that day i woke up very very poor but in the afternoon the lord was true to his word i picked up my mail and there were three checks waiting for me which covered my bills put food on the table and restored my financial standing i nearly passed out in a matter of hours through prayer expectation and surrender my life completely changed that day and i i've never worried about anything in the same way since i still have the same problems i did before but just not in that way different things but when they come i i don't i don't approach them in the same way anymore because it's not up to me i do everything that i know i can do and i just surrender matthew chapter 6 25 has become particularly resonant for me i imagine jesus standing there and saying to me therefore i tell you do not worry about your life what you will eat what you will drink or about your body what you will wear is not life more than food and the body more than clothing truth so of course i still as i said suffer the same slings and arrows and hitches of the human condition that we all do but that financially inciting incident to my deeper conversion that reversion that born-again catholic catharsis was and continues to be evidence of god's mercy and grace abounding in my life that he compels me to share as a testament that if we are humble willing and faithful enough to submit and trust him then with prayer expectant faith and complete surrender anything is not only possible but promised he is mercy thank you so kindly god bless you [Music] you

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Keywords: jonathanroumie, thechosentvseries, catholicapp, nightofmercy, catholify, catholicconference, divinemercysunday, jonathanroumietestimony, catholicfaith

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Length: 35min 5sec (2105 seconds)

Published: Thu Apr 08 2021