Jedi Training Ends In DISASTER! (Public CRINGE) | Fake Martial Arts Masters DESTROYED

jedi training an intense martial arts reserved for only the biggest of boys and i mean that in both a figurative and literal sense anger is not the way of a joke to begin we're going to be taking a look at a lightsaber duel which really summarizes why star wars fans shouldn't be allowed to congregate they're a danger to themselves looking like a double-wide surprise damn now this particular jewel really upsets me ob one too many cannolis is just here to have a good time but this guy in black well he just he's that little nerd that takes himself too seriously and ruins just a good time by just going way over the top [Applause] [Applause] so my guy's like ain't no way you're breaking my lightsaber this cost me at least 50 dollars [Applause] [Applause] done did ruin it that school shooter looking mother broke someone else's lightsaber just because he got too carried away with a damn kids game jay from aria here a western meditation teacher and today i would like to share with you my newest discovery which is the jedi meditation so this is how to become one with the force in brackets real just in case you were mistaken into thinking that this is some kind of crazy [ __ ] thing now my alarm bells are instantly ringing when you look at the bookshelf and all the books are facing backwards that should be a warning sign to absolutely anybody that this lady is offered medication the reason why i call it the jedi meditation is because i've learned it from a jedi and i always like to give credit where credit is due this lady is bat [ __ ] insane and so technically no you don't have any skin because it just dissolves what is this [ __ ] plan throw hydrofluoric acid on your lap you don't have any skin because it just dissolves it turns out that she's not the only one that makes these types of videos apparently they're actually kind of popular on youtube you've got this video here learning how to breathe if you've made it to that age and you haven't learned yet there's no hope for you at all and it's good to be able to move in one direction with no one even realizing you are yeah i can i can see you doing that i think everyone's capable of seeing that you are moving there it's not quite that still brush knee to the right correct so bring in your left foot well i'm going to go out on a limb here and assume that they don't know anything about jedi training you're just trying to remarket your damn hippie dippy crap hey um i've had a request to uh to talk a little bit more about telekinesis um i've actually been trying out a couple more techniques i've i've actually posted a couple already but this one is a little bit i'm not gonna say easy easier because they're all pretty much the same i mean i immediately saw sorry for this guy in fact he sounds ashamed of this video himself he knows his [ __ ] in fact he has to record it in his bathroom in case his parents hear him chatting [ __ ] on the internet and they just get all wound up like what are you doing son who are you talking to about telekinesis you know it's not real and the movement of qi so like i said i'm going to be using the push pull method using the breath so what you want to do is when you inhale you're going to want to feel with this hand and pull up and while you're pulling up you want to stare at the part that you're going to pull up so you're going to go this method will take a little bit longer five minute video of telekinesis tutorial and it doesn't even move the damn thing why would he upload this moving on to the fake martial arts subreddit you guys have been uploading a lot of different videos for me to look at and talk about and i'm very very thankful some of the videos are brilliant so last time i talked about this video i said that i'll give away 20 pounds or 20 dollars to whomever submits the best videos now i'm a man of my word mr smokaracha you did submit the most videos into this reddit and a lot of them were pretty damn good so i would be honored to give you the 20 pound voucher to amazon or whatever best fits your needs so i'll drop you a message on reddit after this video goes live thank you so much for your persistence and your great uploads really appreciate it on today's tactical minute i'll be teaching you how to disarm a handgun from a person that's holding it with both hands [Music] [Applause] okay for this particular technique we're going to do this at medium combat speed to keep holding my hurt my good friend gator here we're going to be doing it at medium speed here to ensure i don't accidentally rip my friend's hands from the stub that will then become his arms because at 100 speed i go full saiyan control the weapon [Music] drag them out once you get them to where you want them simply rotate the weapon back pull it out and then you go to the clip in that fool you don't need to clip in that fool man you just take the gun from him put him on the ground and then you shoot him with it it's this easy everyone's there like oh what do you do there's a school shooter there's a you know a serial killer going around you just take the [ __ ] gun it's that easy because if if you think about it right people are scared of getting shot but if you turn the gun to him if he shoots he shoots himself it's primary school logic but if some little asian dude comes along wraps his legs around your leg and starts pulling the other leg in the other direction splitting your ball bag and ass in two i'd be tapping out i don't give a [ __ ] conor mcgregor you get him in that position his [ __ ] splaying everywhere you're gonna submit that's the ultimate power play and if he doesn't give up just get a little tickle just give him a little tickle right there i mean this is just straight up a deep throat tutorial i i don't even believe that this is a martial arts explanation this is just how to give good sloppy topics [Music] does he give him the slap on the back of the neck oh there it is there he goes every time just beating up on little kids what a hero what a hero this man is just beating up touching up little kids [Music] look at me oh my god i don't know why the one receiving a massage is clothed and the one giving it is topless it's a bit of a role reversal but i respect it nonetheless [Music] i'll tell you what though if someone asks you for a back massage like if your partner says can you give me a back massage and you never want to do one again just [ __ ] do that because they'll never ask you for a massage again [Music] i'm just saying you're mid massage right you step on a bit of lego what are you going to do you're going to stop giving the massage now you've got to work through the pain yes i am diamond hard right now to defend herself against an attack how are you doing baby how are you doing baby darling i mean what is this i mean is it just be so [ __ ] weird that the men don't want to sexually harass you has a man got you in a headlock just [ __ ] break your own neck is a man trying to touch you on the head they didn't feel those titties [Music] ah calling that a martial arts technique is like calling a bit of chicken that's gone through a blender advanced surgery that is not a technique that's a mistake that's a miscarriage in real life that's an abomination of mankind we do like to have fun here on the totally pointless channel that's all i've got for you today please make sure you keep the videos coming i'll keep looking make sure you like the video if you haven't already make sure to subscribe and before you go i've got some brilliant news there is a brand new series on youtube that everyone's talking about called internet trash really great show brilliant videos real funny and they're not martial arts related check them out i will leave it in the description internet trash best playlist you've ever watched really funny videos honestly everyone gives it 10 out of 10. so funny the reviews have just been amazing new york times wall street journal everyone loves it check it out much love bye bye

Channel: TotallyPointlessTV

Views: 1,509,586

Keywords: Fake Martial ARTS Masters DESTROYED!(Exposing Fakes) *REMASTERED*, Exposing Fakes, Fake Martial ARTS Masters DESTROYED!, Fake, Martial, Masters, DESTROYED, Exposing, Fakes, Martial ARTS Masters, Martial ARTS Masters DESTROYED, Martial ARTS, Masters DESTROYED!(Exposing Fakes), ninja training, ninja fail, sword, exposing fakes, sword fail, cutting things with sword, Jedi Fight, Jedi Fight Ends In DISASTER!, Public CRINGE, Lightsaber Duel, Lightsaber Duel Ends In Tears, Martial Farts

Id: IP7WubFqpwI

Length: 10min 7sec (607 seconds)

Published: Thu Jul 16 2020