Is It Ever Okay To Get A Divorce?

welcome to real truth real quick my name is Rick Smith I'm here with Todd Wagner everybody hey alright yeah well we got one thought today that sadly this question has been asked a lot maybe one of the top five questions that we've gotten in and the question deals with the topic of divorce okay is it ever okay any under any situation to get a divorce all right well let me start by saying a few things and I really hope folks track with us because people aren't tuning in them with us just kind of morbid curiosity there is an emotional spiritual personal real reason that they want to ask this question a lot so let me start by saying what we do know is absolutely clear in the Bible God hates divorce but God does not hate divorce sees the reason God hates divorce is because he loves people and when God designed marriage his intention was that would be lifelong that would be covenant 'el meaning it's not a contract that can be broken but it's a covenant between two folks it be monogamous that it would be between a male and a female and that specifically if you're following God's admonition because he wants to go well with you that you would be joined together in like-mindedness that you'd be equally yoked okay so when what God has joined together he doesn't want to see others brought apart divorce is not the unforgivable sin but divorce is always a result of sin and hardness of heart that's very clear from Scripture okay so the question is it ever okay to get a divorce the way the question is phrased makes me uncomfortable alright because what I want to say is that what we know God wants us to do is to always pursue his will and way because his willing way will bring life to us and so if there ever is a time to get divorce it would only be for the purpose of moving a person through the discipline that is the very severe consequence of because of actions or choices that one spouse is made bringing the full weight of that sin and air and hard-heartedness to a point where it demands some separation for the purpose of reconciliation and repentance everything we should do is for the purpose of restoring what God has intended as good and right and true and so I want to make this very clear all right I can answer this question well first of all I want to answer the way Jesus did and secondly I want to answer it very simply in a word the way that's worded I can answer it in a very simple word but I will tell you this the reason that you would is always to reconcile the relationship if you ever would now what did Jesus say because some people asked Jesus this question and they asked him this not because they were looking for a loophole because they wanted to set him up for a failure it specifically says in Matthew 19 we're going to read from here now that they asked Jesus this testing him because they knew whatever he said was going to offend two of one of the major rabbinical schools that were out there one said that you couldn't divorce for any reason the other one said you could have your wife burnt your toast where you just woke up in a bad mood one to move on okay so let's read this this is Matthew chapter 19 and so you just follow along with me I'm gonna ask you a question as I read this okay some Pharisees came to Jesus testing him and asking is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any reason at all we're saying is that ever okay all right so is it against the law watch out Jesus answer sis have you not read that he who created them from the beginning male and female said for this reason a man shall leave his father and mother be joined to his wife and the two shall become one flesh so they are no longer two but one what therefore God has joined together let no man separate so if you had to answer and summarize what Jesus said and verses four five and six when they said is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any reason at all and Jesus says that and you were going to reduce that to one word what would you say I'd say no there one person yeah he said what God is doing together don't let man separate and that really created an issue with them because they go wait a minute why then did Moses command to give her a certificate of divorce to send her away and Jesus answer I'm going to read you what his answer is and I'm going to ask you to give me one word for his answer he says in verse eight because of your hardness of heart Moses permitted you to divorce your wives but from the beginning it has not been that way so in one word what does he say is the reason that he had to permit divorce being a possibility sin that would be the word I would use okay divorce is not the unforgivable sin but make it clear every time divorce is involved it's because of sin now I'll ask you another question what we need to do is expand this you know to some other topics because one of the questions people have is if it's permissible to divorce does that mean I'm free to remarry I'm going to table do a whole real truth real quick on that but I will say this if there is a biblical permission to divorce it never assumes the biblical permission to remarry so watch the real truth real quick on that okay so divorce is not the unforgivable sin there are situations we know the next verse I'm not going to read he talks about what many people call the exception clause and it's for what's called pornea or sexual immorality we have a statement that's listed here in the shownotes rig that we've crafted over many months many years in fact that we think is very well worded it's outlining Scripture and what we say in there is that we know in cases of sexual immorality there is a possibility that divorce may be a provision that would move us back to God's intention which is reconciliation or restoration we acknowledge abandonment is addressed in the Bible in 1st Corinthians 7 well maybe do a whole reel truth real quick on that and we also acknowledge abuse we would never counsel somebody to stay in a situation where they are physically being threatened and their life is at risk proverbs 22 says the the prudency evil and hide themselves with the naive proceed inherit folly okay and so we're not going to be people who sit there and and say from the Bible you got to stay there because God wants you to be married to that guy so you must stay physically close but I want to tell you something don't rush to divorce make sure you involve community and wise biblical counselors God hates divorce because he loves you and he doesn't want you and yours to experience the amazing pain the other thing I want to say real quick on this as we shut this down is that sometimes people believe and what I would say is a false dichotomy that I've got only two options one is stay married and be miserable or two divorced get all in my life and therefore be happy and I'm going to tell you those are not the only two options God's intention is that you would begin to deal with things his way that would leave the reconciliation restoration and peace I want to ask one follow-up question we're long on time but I want to ask us you said this you said that that God divorce could be a way to reconcile the relationships somebody watching this guilt well how the world could divorce help me to get reconciled yeah it's a severe mercy it's it's a it's a extreme act of consequence on somebody so I'll tell you this in Jeremiah 3 God divorces Israel in other words he lets Israel have the fruit of its ways it wants nothing to do with God so God grants them that divorce God doesn't divorce them actually he grants them that divorce and then they experienced hey there is no other God out there that's a God so they couldn't remarry to any other God because there was no other God they experienced the horror of going their own way and then they long for that reconciliation sometimes it is absolutely appropriate to say okay listen if you're going to divorce me and you're going to go your own way I'm gonna let you experience the horror and the repercussions of that and yet I'm going to continue to make myself such the person that God wants me to be that everybody who meets you would know you to be a fool for not returning to this potential relationship so what I would say is that divorce is a consequence that at times in severe instances can be permitted because of sin all right but we would never encourage the believing spouse to be the initiator of that and we would always encourage the person who says they're serious follower of Christ to be the one who initiates reconciliation and to be hopeful that God might restore what sin has destroyed that's consistent the nature of God so hey and if you're watching this and you're out there we'll put an email address on the screen and we can help you if you're in the dallas-fort Worth area we have some programs if you are having difficulties in your marriage we really believe that you know God is bigger than anything that you could be going through and we've seen couples get healed and divorce papers love a link to reengage which is available here and many spots around the country but read the position paper that's there I hope this is a helpful start for you read the position paper know we love you and we want God's best for you we hate divorce because we love you we'll see you next week on road truth real quick

Channel: Real Truth. Real Quick.

Views: 108,491

Rating: 4.7987728 out of 5

Keywords: Divorce (Quotation Subject), watemark church, real truth real quick, todd wagner, RTRQ

Id: 3t1DuNR-v-s

Length: 9min 8sec (548 seconds)

Published: Sat Jun 20 2015