In Living Color - Best of in Living Color 2 & Arsenio Hall of Justice (Season 02 Episode 21 / 22)

and then it was safe to walk down the street mine hi I'm Keenen Ivory Wayans thanks for tuning in to living color check it out how many times you've been sitting around with French trying to tell him your favorite sketch from the show only they didn't see it or check it out this what I've done for you I put all the best in one show so call your friends have a watch I'll see you next week peace it just the army with crucification now you probably want this turtle like mission it's down the street around the block no how come to be all I can because I've been what I've been in pain - well let me ask you something boy what do you think you hand off for Donna you know hey camel on that one I am in the business of signing up real life soldiers maggot maggot hey I know Maggie hey I never been with another man once I was desperate I needed the money I was drunk and I don't appointment well I'm in the middle of unemployment you know as much as I would love to send you over to Iraq I don't think you'd last ten minutes okay just for instance what would you do if you had to engage the enemy in hand-to-hand combat anything becomes a weapon you take that out the secret weapon what is that smell give you $5.00 if you just get out of here coast is clear gonna burn you know feminine product oh yes hurry bad time of the month huh Joyce that's not cleavage it swelling suffering from PMS Joyce see I told you she look bloated it can't seem to disguise the fact that it's your time of the month well now femco brings you fashion tampons stylish comfortable and fun they come in assorted colors and go with any outfit Oh Joyce I love those tampons conveniently packaged in boxes of 12 24 and 186 and they're super absorbent something you just can't find another fashion where fashion tampons oh honey I'm going so cattle on down and give me some G Joyce you look great today I like a woman who can accessorize really turns me off nice dress show us this fashion Tampa because at that time of the month you want to look good and there's also fashion maxi and many fashion tampons right thanks for coming in and come visit us again right all right yeah fight the power hey joy what joy what joy what joy I want for my next movie tell you it's not joy joy joy we're back in Brooklyn all right all right in Brooklyn's joy not jiwa okay it's not Jack hey all right it's Jackie it's not Sharda all right it's Sadie what you gonna call me next what you gonna call me spike hey daddy I want to show you my new product check it out ah you liked right likes right god it's the mold better butter dispenser this is more better butter standard by the mouth of mixed legs I got a customer can I help you yeah do you carry sneakers sneakers yeah like tennis shoes right like basketball shoes yes I just plain sneakers yes got them oh great check it out my own mind spy Keys right come on you gotta like come on look you gotta like I don't please baby baby please please baby baby baby baby please baby baby clintons please baby baby please David okay I'll take all right you sure yes morning yes you by him yes you should absolutely all right hey phone right over here you get a copy of school days with that oh that's okay it's free oh it's free free that's okay excuse me can you turn the radio down please excuse me continue ringing around please Hey return this free top your school dance is wrong is defective so no I didn't go to black college I just didn't get completely ready grounds Thanks could you please turn the radio down hello spikes joint ah very funny deliver pizzas to your house yeah right for the 40th time hell no music radio announcers fight why doesn't my key point that he's black sequel to its Board of Directors man it's very complicated issue a right you can read about it in my new book the making of Nike commercials alright 1995 I need 20 triple-a batteries for radio batteries twice right what do you want now I know what you're thinking right now you thinking hey now it's a great time to throw a trash can through the window well I couldn't agree with you more that's why I've got trash cans in the back for $15 the lightweight riot sighs what a discount we also get a free copy of school days legally repressing my baza - I've retracted my go dance with gigantic proportions and the silence of the prohibition you see defecate the fluids of the teacher between the essence of the euro intercourse AT&T allows you to reach out and touch someone even when they don't get out much uh-huh right exactly okay brother okay see all you doing right now uh-huh is saturating your lips right they said to expose a hemorrhoid a ramification I merely delineate for her the colonic office by separating the gluteus from the masses but you seem to mess the cake the proclamation my brother okay because the gastrointestinal phlebitis pressed against the crustacean of the colostomy or going that's your bed the pyuria which has me you got me brother the diarrhea okay the in Jannah or virgin defender harvest time you get mad you are Metamucil try licking up lame excuses don't you wanna cuddle baby needs its post-coital cuddling bringing you down see you don't understand see I got to be somewhere at 6:00 tomorrow morning no but you can't leave with me cuz my car was an accident and only has one seat left sit on your lap listen I didn't want to have to tell you this and it's top secret I'm on a mission for the CIA I have to travel the home it's a matter of life or death but if you die I don't want to live geez what do I have to do to get rid of her sounds like you need the ejector bed from root cow yes it's simple to operate and can't eject up to 2,000 thousand a single thrust this never happened to me before I guess I must have been under a lot of stress maybe some fresh air might help yes the ejector bed your best friend in a sticky situation it's my wife ejector desk and ejector chair sold separately 120 over 70 hell-blood partners you're gonna pull through it's in pretty bad shape take a look for yourself look doc do whatever you got to do member please make them whole again so we can rebuild him we have the technology going it's gonna cost you six million dollars six million dollars the department doesn't have that kind of money fifteen thousand right 28:45 what I can't promise anything but we'll try he'll be a lot shorter and a little slower he's gonna be a lot Thanks we gotta get you hang in there partner coming this spring to a theater near you the head the head always gets mad this is beginning man he's too far away you will never catch him throw me Adam no way man too dangerous just do it Thank You chase you anything and women quite him irresistible I never dreamed it could be like this oh you got they say baby it's not what mankind so uses tap they're coming this way to a theater near you cable access channel 62 hello I'm Blaine Edward and I'm Antoine Mayweather and welcome to men our films the show that lifts at movies from a male point of view tonight's show is sponsored by nuts and honey what'd you say nothin honey basically just one good tonight we'll be wrapping up the summer films first up is the box-office smash Total Recall yes this is the movie where muscle bound honest what snicker ghost search of his past just a hint Arnold try looking in the closet next we have Betsy's wedding hated it then there's ghosts you know Patrick Swayze was the real standout in this film you know I breathed life into his spirit any day even if I did have to go through Whoopi Goldberg perish the thought deal now we come to Dick Tracy you know I love the title but the movie just loves me live I know what you said this is this is what I don't get all the characters fit their names you know flattop had a flattop pruneface look just like a little prune but I never got the chance to see it's not in here then this pretty woman hey this one should have been called a fish called Julia next Eddie Murphy was back in another 48 hours I'm sorry this movie just got off on the wrong track I feel that they should have spent more time where the real story is in the prisons I'd like to see more about them all sweat amends all together them tiny little sail with no one to turn to but each others who dropped us I get it then we come to spike lee's mo better blues I'm sorry and careful it just didn't put no tune in my horn I'm sorry but I like this one I mean little Spike Lee outdone himself this time he really stretched out in a dual role as both the lead characters manager and love interest oh he was okay as the manager but he just thrilled me to death and those gripping love scenes with big old handsome diss their Washington what courage it must have taken for little Spike Lee to take off them glasses and let that little hair get naughty and say hey this is me whoa put the car in park the love interest was played by Spike Lee's little sister yeah well touch me in the morning and then just walk away I don't know I think you should go see this again then you tell me who's who yeah well you go without okay finally we have diehard what a way to go 90 minutes with mr. Bruce Willis oh yes don't tip my tummy with the taste of nuts and honey do you know the only thing I didn't understand was all the violence in the gym cuz the Tyler suggested love story mm-hmm second that emotion this one still deserves the new-and-improved two snaps a twist and a kiss well their trust show next week we'll be looking at air America starring Mel Gibson and lo Robert Downey jr. pilot to co-pilot we're going down in flames and all mankind an something exactly and that it was safe to walk down the street family to show so that's not trick there's no muffin lands I get them applause in life welcome to another edition of the show you know we poke fun on a lot of groups here on our live in color and we always get letters people on it well how you decide which group you're gonna make fun of each week so what I decided to do is show you what the process is and with the help of the flag girls we'll show you how we think come on ladies um yeah by spitting out a little calming wheel erase right here and let's see what we're gonna make fun of you this seems to come up every week anyway and now another episode of the head detective alright alright remember who's supposed to be undercover disguise up we want anybody to recognize you could blow the whole operation hey barkeep you have a scotch and soda she can i stir you wanna check out the chick look nanogram for sake go easy on ahead say lucious can I buy you a drink who said that damn hi angel listen no it's moments like this with being short has its advantages I don't date cops and let me tell you something don't you ever look up a lady's dress again unless she asks you to and I forget about her remember one a case come on let's go check out that bowling alley back in this I could breathe would you stop Danielle what the four split tonight and that's the way the ball bounces Hey I think I know why you're getting so many splits these pins are loaded with cocaine Hey Hey if anybody follows I swear I'll put her away I think I'm gonna go for backup Ted he's getting too far away they go over the roof Oh remember when we played high school football the big game fourth quarter last play little nuggets down by two and you're not saying what I think you're saying kick me out just do it damn it hey hey I think you forgot with your shorts on man you know I felt this has been another episode of the head detective a man-whore was having but they always helping the handicapped physically challenged I shall challenge them all Oh dr. Marty destroy handyman in his entire disabled army with my newest invention destroy yes madam let's go slide accident accident already what are you going to do ruin handyman how are you going to wreak havoc on the city now go I am a man checking out the vault lots of diamonds in there thanks to you I've come to make a web borrow card you can't go with wait you can't go in there Oh champ get your mail message bangs Thank You mr. fans please call me dog don't you think maybe you and night is going and doing tonight oh I'd love to Clark but I can't tonight perhaps you haven't heard handyman's turned to a life of crime I've got to go what about a cup of water by the cooler this can only be the work of the evil dr. naughty look like a job for an auntie man seventy three thousand nine hundred ninety nine inches a gig get up why are you trying to destroy my name a long time at all I got a ticket for parking in a handicap zone I have made it my life to destroying them the physically challenged now it's time someone stopped you and a man let me introduce you you ruined my classroom I get your happy man okay handyman it's great to have you back never underestimate the powers of the handicapped we won't handyman redeemed what a great story too bad you could have been there well I must have over to them handyman oh I mean smart to think of it why is it that whenever handyman's around you seem to disappear would it be bad no the adventures so in conclusion before the ladies and gentlemen of the jury passed judgment consider this my client was sleepwalking yes sleepwalking the defense rests is the prosecution ready to cross-examine who is the prosecutor in this case Your Honor that would be and these are too stupid to get out of jury duty proceed with your prosecution oh yes your honor that's what I'm gonna do I'm gonna get to the bottom of things did you see what I did from their lies that's what I do I get to the bottom of now no further ado I'd like to bring on my first witness he's a very talented man he's assaulted 57 women and then showed in a difference for human life and property so please give a big round of applause to mr. Rose let me let's get right into it Rona now your picture is up all over the post office you're on the FBI's top 10 list two years in a row what the court would like to know is that celebrity life changes what was it like before all the fame I was locked in the closet most of my life it was abused as a child one time my mother held me under water for about four and a half minutes amusing just a little choked me witness now I haven't read the deposition but my people tell me that you used exhibit 8 to salt all 57 of your victims or the jerk please note Exhibit A is a heavy blunt instrument work out does this ain't no sister murder weapon this is one bad man with gem look like one of them brontosaurus ribs on the front stone Oh put the ribs in the back of the car when you over material mr. hull unless there is someone else you would like to call to the stand I suggest you wrap this up very well Jana enough a surprise guest tonight miss Dana Murphy this relates oh it doesn't John it's just that it's sweeps week and it would be nice to have Eddie in the car you know me an idiot best friends and we made a pact before we got things never let a woman come between us and you are one fine bad melon mr. pryzbo barbecue sauce all over you and working like a real well what a jerk please no she is that listen Betty was here he'd steal phone self haha yeah now you've heard some very compelling arguments tonight on both sides the issue compelling that's very big word I know a lot brother sitting there going what you talk about man anyway a man's life hangs and with that in mind have you ever noticed how white people sit in a jury Verity no sitting going I want to be guilty brother be seen they're going say man they pay me $12 eighty-five [ __ ] I'll stay all day maybe in maybe they're not jokes folks just a little something to make you see and all that the prosecution rests this has been a total travesty of justice ah she is fine let's not forget to give a big round of applause to the main man of the night himself come on I want you to give it up like you got a boiled egg and a glass of water in your stomach loud mr. Rowland the jury reached a decision yes we have your honor and although we personally find mr. Biggs here guilty beyond any shadow of a doubt there was no evidence presented in this courtroom of that nature and so therefore we the jury find the defendant not guilty stop be no:1 rolling yeah I won't lie man they came your [ __ ] to take us home with some of that nasty old leftover lit in your bellybutton didn't check between your toes [ __ ] you you

Channel: In Living

Views: 1,621,346

Keywords: In Living Color, IMDB, Comedy Show, Full Season, Season 2, Tv Show, The Best of in Living Color 2, Arsenio Hall of Justice

Id: WnaWzLGmF_k

Length: 45min 41sec (2741 seconds)

Published: Wed Sep 10 2014