If you want to find your perfect match then Listen! Sadhguru

[Music] um [Music] it once happened pillai was at the family dinner and when everybody settled down for dinner he stood up at the table and announced i am going to marry lucy who's just across the street i hope that's not the name then the father said what you going to marry lucy she has nothing she's like a you're going to marry that lucy mother said what you're going to marry that lucy the uncle uncle's always pitching in this kind of matters uncle said what you're going to marry that lucy have you seen her hair it looks fake the aunt what you going to marry lucy she's she's always painted you're going to marry the painted woman the little boy the nephew can't be left out he said you want to marry lucy she's under doesn't even know what is cricket how can you marry her sankaranpullah stood his ground and said yes i'm going to marry lucy everybody asked in one voice why he said because she has no family there are no many opinions to battle with so who is the right person i don't want to take away all the romance from your life but let me tell you this there is no right person on this planet if you get into that kind of unrealistic mindset i have found the right person oh you will be soon disappointed you must understand there is no right person first thing is to see whether i am the right person yes am i the right person and there are no right people on this planet if you you have your nonsense they have that nonsense we can adjust nonsense nonsense one first and foremost thing is you bring yourself to your place where your experience of life is just pleasant by yourself you're wonderful now let us see what gets drawn to this one if you're really wonderful things will happen in every way i'm saying and this whole thing is an american thing that there is a soul mate somewhere god made just one more person just for you but these days every two years he keeps making one more person [Applause] obviously god is making too many mistakes with you see body needs a mate understandable maybe psychologically also you need a mate understandable emotionally you need a mate a soul cannot need a mate so soul doesn't need a myth nor was some person made perfectly for you okay if you invest a deep sense of involvement something wonderful may happen it's because of your involvement not because the other person is fantastic no even if you choose a fool actually it's easy that way if they're not stupid why would they come to you first of all no no i'm just being nasty so even if you choose a fool it doesn't matter if you involve yourself it can turn out very beautiful you chose the smartest person in the universe it could be a disaster so do not think in terms of you know whatever is made for each other nonsense no you choose the opposite actually but after some time after a little bit of time you slowly start expecting they're just like you this is a serious mistake because if one more person becomes just like you you won't be able to bear with them for two days nobody's like you and that's good don't look for sameness not necessary because the difference you tango not otherwise [Applause] our mothers have set amazing benchmark the moment you say mothers yeah they're giving a sound ambience or babies crying oh okay perfect that's the halo effect i think yeah so they've set up quite a big benchmark of being an ideal wife however i or girls of my generation feel that we cannot be as good as wife our mothers have been so should i feel that i am falling short in my personal life or should i feel that i'm not giving enough justice to my marriage once i'm married how should i feel about this you know our center in the united states is in tennessee tennessee is a little one kind of state okay mary makowsky that's not romanian right mary makowsky got married and after their honeymoon they came home and she threatened him that she's going to make a dinner all by herself i'm sorry she she said she'll make dinner for the new husband and husband came home from work and she served the dinner and he put it in his mouth and slowly he was chewing on it and went into profound thought then she was very excited about this dinner and she said the only two things my mother taught me how to cook the meatloaf and the apple pie then he looked at her and said darling which one is this so your mother your grandmother how they made good wives largely it was believed the way to a man's heart is through his stomach now today your husband will call uh uber eats and whatever quick picks and this and that and swiggies and whatever all right so you can't make a good wife based on how your grandmother became a good wife you can't become a good wife based on how your mother became a good wife situations have changed expectations have changed it's not in the stomach anymore for some it's gone up into the head for some it's gone further south yes so you don't do that essentially what a husband and wife means is because you're not geared most people are not geared very few people in this world are geared to make this journey a life all by themselves they're organized enough within themselves totally they never feel anything missing in their life because they've made themselves like that but most people need somebody else to lean on either emotionally psychologically there are needs in a human being physical needs psychological needs emotional needs maybe social needs economic needs variety of needs to fulfill these needs you want to find one person that you can depend on because it's very difficult even to find one person who with whom you can share everything that you have your body mind emotion and your works so this is the idea formalizing it is so that every time you get a little some little friction you don't fall apart so little tying up so that things don't fall apart very easily all right nothing else the biggest mistake humanity made was they started saying marriages are made in heaven that's why it's such a mess what's done here if you see marriages are made between us and we took responsibility for who we are how we could have made it work but the damn thing is made in heaven not suitable here it's because it's an alien stuff [Music] everything is a mess because you think it's made elsewhere by somebody else if you understand it's made by you for your well-being to fulfill your needs and your purposes so that you can go through this journey of life with least amount of trouble and friction then you would handle it more responsibly isn't it and according to contemporary needs not have your grandmother did her marriage you can't do it that way because expectations and situations have completely altered themselves so if you hold somebody who is your friend and who is your need you must understand you are in this relationship because you need maybe the other person also needs but that's from their side as far as you are concerned you made this relationship because you need it badly isn't it if you understand and you're always grateful for this that somebody is fulfilling all your need you would handle it well you wouldn't make a misery out of it but now you think somebody else needs you then you will make a mess out of it you understand you need it well the other person also needs to understand he needs it now there is a question if you think oh you need me so i'm going to exploit you no this is not about you squeezing happiness out of somebody or they squeezing happiness out of you if two happy people meet then there can be something wonderful happening between them but you are a misery and you think somebody else should be the source of your happiness well it'll multiply in this materialistic age the real feeling of love is disappearing from our life most of the love we receive from others and express to others is superficial how can we reinforce the real feeling of love in our own life and in others forget about others if you if you learn to be loving by your own nature not because of somebody else or something else i know the question is coming from facebook there's an enormous possibility you can even love those people who don't even exist so i'm saying it's a tremendous possibility so if you just become love not love somebody then you will know the nature of love if you love somebody it's a fickle happening because no human being will happen 100 the way you want them every human being on this planet is going to disappoint you believe me not because they'll do something wrong because nobody can fulfill the unrealistic expectation you have of them it's simply not possible have you been able to fulfill anybody's expectation i'm asking you entirely partially but never entirely isn't it believe me whoever comes i want you to know the ideal people whom you worship when krishna was there his wife's complained all right love is not a relationship a relationship is a different thing love is a certain sweetness of your emotion whether you look at a tree or a dog or a man or a woman or a child or just at the sky why can't you look at it lovingly because it's not about loving the sky it's about the sweetness of your emotion if your emotions are sweet whatever you look at you look at it in a certain way right now you have nasty emotions whatever you look at you look at it in a different way so you have always associated love with somebody no no no this is not about somebody love is not something that you do it is something that you can become if you're willing you can become love you can make your emotion into a very sweet space you if you make your ma if you make your body very pleasant it becomes pleasure if you sit here it can be great pleasure just sitting here and breathing if your mind becomes pleasant we say this is joy if your emotions become pleasant we say this is love if your very life energies become pleasant we say this is blissfulness this is ecstasy if your surroundings become pleasant we call that success now you're calling your success with somebody as love that's a mistake you have a success story with somebody you're calling that love no that is actually success because that needs lots of management but for you to be loving there is no management if you just make your emotions sweet your emotions are sweet and it's beautiful be like this it's not about anybody if somebody comes we can share it if nobody comes you can sit here with eyes closed and still be loving what's the problem it is not about somebody it's not an action it is not something that you do it is something that you can become [Music] [Music] m [Music] foreign

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Keywords: sadhguru on perfect match, sadhguru about finding right person, how to find right person, how to find perfect match, sadhguru about right person, can you find right person, sadhguru, sadhguru onepath, sadhguru jaggi vasudev, sadhguru yoga, sadhguru isha, isha yoga, isha foundation, adiyogi, sadhguru meditation, sadguru, sadhguru 2021, sadhguru spiritual awekening, @onepath, sadhguru latest

Id: hcQQLR3jpk0

Length: 15min 4sec (904 seconds)

Published: Tue Jan 12 2021