I watched every Shane Dawson film so you don't have to

ready let's go [Music] no [Music] shane dawson is one of the biggest youtubers out there it's a title that the guy has been holding for quite some time uh nowadays he's friends with jeffree star he sells makeup makes documentaries the guy is pretty much living his best life go back a few years ago and you can really see how much his content has changed he went for making videos with really crude and offensive humor that would later come back to haunt him to starting his very own makeup line again as i said a lot has changed during the old days it seemed like shane didn't only want to be a youtuber he had a dream a dream of being a hollywood star that's why he took part in some of the worst movies of all time so i did a little bit of digging and i found out that this guy has been not one not two but actually three feature films ladies and gentlemen one of them was even directed by the guy and you know recently i've seen the cs theory video or where they go on about if you make yourself suffer you can truly appreciate the good stuff that you have in your life or something like that so that's exactly what i did i made myself suffer i watched all three of these films in one single day the 11th of july what what a truly disappointing day i watched this trilogy of shane or shame so you don't have to because i'm pretty nice anyways let's get right to it [Music] i woke up at 9 30 a.m i remember being very relaxed and at peace with the world i drank some cold iced tea while listening to barry white um honestly i could not have asked for a nicer morning until i just decided to go ahead and ruin it for myself the first movie i watched was internet famous directed by michael gallagher it's the latest movies acted in and no joke while watching it my mom came up to me and asked me if everything's okay because i had such a pained expression on my face i i just want to point out that at the time of me watching that movie it was honestly the worst film i've seen in my life there was no competition just the god damn worst i don't make videos on movies on the regular on my day-to-day life i just try to watch things that i would probably like i don't expose myself to this kind of stuff on purpose because you know why would i so yeah this easily took the cake anyways let's uh start off by describing this movie so internet famous is a 2016 comedy mockumentary uh which is a joke documentary about probably the worst group of people you've ever seen in your life the premise of the movie is this you got this talk show host his name is chris with an exclamation mark and he's doing this crazy competition where all these different massive web stars compete against each other and a talent show and the best internet star the one with the most talent eventually gets their own you know tv show or something oh that's a pretty simple concept you know how much of this could you really get wrong uh the obvious answer is everything this movie has no plot nothing is happening uh i'm not kidding you there are no noticeable events at all nothing is happening the only thing that does happen is that there's this talent show at the end and that's just like one scene and we get into that one scene like one hour into this 90 minute film first hour of this movie is just them introducing the main characters over and over again it just goes in this sort of cycle where they talk about this guy this girl and then this guy and when they're done they're just showing them all again shane's acting skills are you know it's just the kind of stuff you'd expect to see in like a smosh youtube parody sketch thing not a goddamn feature film you never really have a good time when his character's on screen because he's just constantly this big annoying entitled prick of a character it's been mentioned many many times is a problem for people so if we just like lose that i'm just saying i'm not taking anything out of the movie to please a bunch of out-of-work actors in pittsburgh you should be lucky to get an audition for a feature film oh wait my bad this is not a clip from internet famous this is actually a very real clip of the actual real shane dawson making a movie but that's not for now what are you doing editing pinelli get out of here uh anyways as i said tomas has a boyfriend uh though they claim not to be together named hank and their ship name is hamas which is a funny joke so stepping is when you take two people who you think are totally men for each other say that you ship them which is basically like putting them together as a couple so hank and tomas they go hamas and then we pretend like they are married and then they do stuff that marry people usually do like sex things which is great because they're straight in real life so we have to fantasize sorry for sneaking up on you with this clip guys i just didn't really see it coming myself i wanted you to experience the exact same thing i have i don't want to be alone anyway since this movie is in this sort of you know documentary format and it follows shane's character and hank it really reminds you of the shane and jeffree star documentaries and radiates a lot of the similar vibes i could see jeffree star saying half the stuff shane is saying in this movie the pacing of this movie is very off scenes last for way too long you always have these very big awkward pauses between sentences that make you feel very uncomfortable but again this is a movie about nothing and i guess i just wanted to reach feature film length so hey uh screw it but then we finally reached the talent show scene the only thing that happens in this movie and then we get to find out that it also kind of sucks which is very disappointing there's a bit where they tell all the characters as a surprise that they're going to be performing live on stage in five minutes and they're all so shocked which is kind of odd considering some of them have live bits prepared but i digress anyways in their shaw chris jokes about how they shouldn't worry because hey this is just the same as making videos in your home only that there are a bunch of cameras and a production team working on it or whatever and i was like hey this is this movie these youtuber films are being made by people that think that just because they have so many followers and what they do works when they do it at home they can just do whatever they want but sometimes you know that they can't and this movie sucks all in all this movie gets a one out of ten and that's even a bit of a stretch okay so what do you need to know about smiley well it's clearly the best horror movie of all time it's just a bit of a classic everyone's talking about it even to this day trust me oh look the guy that directed it is even the same guy as last time oh this is going to be a blast anyways that it starts with an 11 year old girl being on amigo which okay her sister comes up and they do this thing where the one character tells the other character every single little bit of detail they need to know about the villain so she goes outside comes back opens her computer again and oh my god i can't show this that is a bit horrible then we get to meet this set of characters who explain again the whole concept of this movie this time i'll explain it to you too viewer there's a guy who has a smiley for a face and his name's smiley uh you know and and he kills people whoa they probably say that he has some kind of sad backstory but i don't really remember any of that uh okay anyways if you go on the fake amigo website and type uh i'm sorry this is this is a serious movie a lot of people worked on it uh if you go if you go to the website and type uh do it for the lulls with the you uh three times the person in front of you just kind of gets killed which honestly is one of the dumbest things i've ever heard but do it for the lulls really dude that's that's what you're gonna base this whole movie upon doing it for the lulls jesus christ also i want to give a big shout out to the cinematography in this movie uh pretty cool everything looks really nice and uh gray and then we get to meet shane and i i'd like to say that the way his character gets introduced definitely did not age well hey hey what's up i'm zane what's up i'm bender yeah what are you doing here pedobear don't call me that okay i thought it would be cool you're a pedobear do you approve this message [ __ ] kids or guy so now we got to see the other side of the people who got that girl killed from earlier you know the ones that wrote do it for the lulls three times and when watching this i thought to myself these guys are kind of stupid they just go together and murder a bunch of people for the lulls and every single time they they think it's some kind of joke that everyone's in on it it doesn't make any sense would someone just constantly have like fake blood available to them is that like just what they base their assumptions on and they say that and then the main character in this movie the main actress is just like oh yeah that's very logical it's just a joke it's insanity anyways uh yeah say hello to our main character her name is i'm i'm not sure what her name is she's really dumb so she gets together with her friend and tries to do the the thing for the lolz herself editing finally here look look what i just noticed look at this massive jump cut just one frame after the other this doesn't care this didn't care at all and then they sort of get that they killed him i think they they understood that's what's going on which is a very shocking thing to find out you know that you caused something like that to another human being jesus how could he even continue your day-to-day life oh she's having a little chat with her dad talking about the struggles of being a small time girl in the big city oh look she's smiling that's very nice anyways uh moving forward shane dawson and this girl are are probably gonna have some sort of love thing i base this on the extreme amount of the sexual chemistry i've seen in this uh this incredible scene you seem really nice [Music] you do too maybe we could be friends yeah yeah what's your number okay that right there kids is true love that that's what it's all about the main girl and shane become closer and closer his name is like blinder or binder or something like that he's a computer genius and also a a big psychopath she talks to him about how she she thinks smiley exists and he was like oh cool that's that's exciting after all that after fully knowing what's going on she went on that awful website again then why the hell am i supposed to care if she dies i want this character to not exist anymore she's a whiny annoying idiot so yeah let's let's get to the end bit uh shane gets his throat slit and then a whole bunch of smiley people uh pull up and spook her she goes through with her gut instincts and then just straight up jumps out of the window and dies yes ladies and gentlemen the witch is dead the menace is out of the picture she's not gonna murder any people anymore but then plot twist every single person that died isn't actually dead they're all part of this hacker group like anonymous but you know lamer everyone was in on it her friends her loved ones everyone and their goal was another to troll her until she died because cyberbullying is awful and then i i kid you not this is the ending of this movie the main character's friend asks one of the guys from the group of idiots the following question hey do you think we're bad people he responds with huh yeah and then she asks uh why do you think we did this he responds by typing do it for the lows do it for the lows that's how this movie ends do it for the lows this [ __ ] types in chat do it for the lulz this movie is the worst i've never seen in my life anything this goddamn awful it's a disgrace of a movie made by people who just did it because they they could for the laws not because they had a reason to the concept is disgusting they try to pull off this sort of uh this is why trolling is bad thing but they just did it in the worst way possible i was really happy when she jumped out of the window she's a murdering idiot it's so unappealing and in this one day i've seen two movies that are now my least favorite ones of all time this one gets a straight zero out of ten i hate this so so much shane being a bad guy is such a turn on no i thought shannon was the good guy great horror movie i just wish shane was a good guy and that he was in it more but uh overall great movie this movie reminds me of um [ __ ] uh what's that movie called that just came out like something about a birthday killer uh the main character was like reliving the same day where she gets killed at at the same point until uh she figures out who killed her uh happy birthday killer or i don't know i've watched this movie before it's bad movie i don't like it you're a bad movie after this i watched uh two short films uh hi i hate my selfie and i hate my selfie too and you know what i i can really relate to this title uh they suck you know they they really suck i'm not gonna talk about them uh what i will talk about instead is the man who directed these two short films and the two feature films that i watched earlier the name of that man is obviously michael gallagher i hate you michael gallagher you may not know me but you've made yourself a new enemy today if you don't know who michael gallagher is uh in short he's the director behind some of the worst films just in general he makes a lot of youtuber films he directed the thinning you know that very dumb logan paul film and if that wasn't enough he also directed the sequel to that movie the thinning new world order he made smiley internet famous both of the i hate my selfie movies you know really if i'm looking at this list it's just a bunch of things that shouldn't really be made the one movie that he didn't make that i'm gonna talk about today is not cool is a movie directed by the one and only shane dawson it's also bad maybe not as bad as smiley but you know that's that's a pretty low bar right there critics loved it though what not cool really is though is an abyss an insult to the craft of filmmaking storytelling and entertainment in almost every way when it's not built around mean-spirited revolting jokes about anybody within dawson's color attractiveness level size and gender the genitalia exposing feces eating homeless black man is simply jaw-dropping it's a dreary all-screaming pity party about thoroughly unappealing individuals oh wow anyways this movie is about two young busters going back to their hometown for the holidays one of these people is shane dawson the cool attractive guy from school duh and the other one is jeremy who was a bit of a nerd in school it's a god damn mess i'm not really gonna do an in-depth review of it you can watch ichi's video for that it's just kind of full of crude disgusting humor it's like the kind of joke a middle schooler who watch way too many of these american pie movies would make it's just shane going oh man i wonder what awful disgusting thing i can show on screen this time the answer is obviously a homeless man eating his own feces what i will focus on with this movie is mr dawson at this point i've realized that this is a theme that goes on with these movies and older videos of his where he used to always want you to think that he's so cool he literally wrote in lines where characters go on about how much they want to have sex with him and how goddamn hot this guy is i realize what his acting technique is he always talks in the in the sort of way where he clearly wants you to think that he's just a cute guy oh he's so cute you just you just want to pinch his goddamn cheeks you wanna say grip this is the first time on a friday i've actually done anything this movie was made as part of this challenge where two feature films were made with a similar script to see what will these two up-and-coming directors do with their film artistically oh man i wonder which movie was better oh oh what is really great is that the production company behind the challenge made a little documentary out of the whole thing and as i stated earlier the similarities between shane dawson and his uh entitled prick of a character from internet famous are starting to become more and more apparent it's fine that you're saying facebook i just want to say it too many times but she also said you facebook started i know so we can use it but say if the opening montage doesn't have facebook and it's like generic what do you don't understand what i'm saying it just says facebook no i do it's okay it's okay why are you saying it's not okay because she's saying it so many times that we can always say it once so then we either can say it oh no that's not do you understand what she's saying jesus that that is just some of the most condescending stuff i've ever seen he seems so awful to work with it's just filled up with examples of people with way more experience than him going up to shane and being like you know what you probably should do uh this and that to make your movie a bit better and then he just shouts at them like a maniac one review said that if you enjoy my movie you must be a sociopath that was in the los angeles time you know it's it's really great that he's taking all this criticism into consideration so there's this bit where the production company people come up to shane and they're like hey shane buddy how you doing um listen man the actors that are supposed to be in your movie are actually not too sure they want to be in it anymore since they heard there's this uh whole big running gag about a homeless man eating his own [ __ ] and shane's very uh calm response is what what do you mean what do you mean they don't want to work with me i'm shane dawson i'm shane [ __ ] dawson these stupid little actors don't know anything when i was an actor i used to do stupid little weasley actors don't want to work with me shane dawson the biggest director of all time this is preposterous when i was an actor i was auditioning for everything i don't quite understand the logic of being picky when you have no job no but that's the problem they do have jobs and one woman in particular who's a professor who's up for 10 years why am i seeing professors where are the actors you won't read the notes i want to see all the notes now you said the opposite to me you specifically told me that night you guys sent me the notes and i'm never gonna read them as a joke listen compromise a lot in this movie but like if i want one extra protection just let me have it no one's not letting you out you shouldn't feel like i've compromised i feel like you you've learned and you've gotten notes there's certain things that i don't like that are still there like i have definitely compromised you you have direct you have final cut on it i feel like i've been very open to every note every suggestion everything i've never like yelled at you guys said i don't know like if i just want an extra beat somewhere like i feel like i deserve it at this point i've been yelled at that was a bit of a painful mess wasn't it what's the moral of this video uh it really goes to show you that every youtuber sucks every single one i suck shane dawson sucks leafy sucks that's pretty much everyone i think here's the thing that really disappoints me in all these films you got a whole bunch of money to make a movie and especially with not cool it seems like the guy had a lot of creative control even though he claimed a lot of times that he doesn't so you know they had this opportunity and this is what they decided to do all three of these movies are just insanely hollow i don't think they have any right to exist genuinely internet famous is a nothing of a film smiley is the worst film of all time do it for the lulls are you kidding me really and not cool is just a bit disgusting if you want to know my opinion about whether or not you should watch any of these films the answer is no you should definitely shouldn't you know go watch the nice guys or doom patrol season two a new season came out hopefully it's nice i i i didn't really watch it yet or maybe i don't know go look outside your window maybe there's a nice view over there and that's it uh video's over bye [Music] you

Channel: Pinely

Views: 715,354

Keywords: Pinely, shane, shane dawson, animation, shane movies, shane dawson not cool, not cool, internet famous, smiley, shane dawson movies, movie, movie review, shane dawson jeffree star drama, satire, tati westbrook, tati, jeffree star, make up, jeffree star shane dawson drama, shane jeffree, shane movie, shane acting, acting, so you don't have to

Id: IAx-m1Z8L1c

Length: 21min 52sec (1312 seconds)

Published: Fri Jul 31 2020