I spent a day with people w/ DWARFISM

i'm anthony padilla and i'm curious what would you do if behind every corner there was someone there pointing at you laughing at you or even taking your picture without your consent i spent a day with people with dwarfism who dealt with that reality on a daily basis we'll uncover the painful truth about limb lengthening and other surgical procedures and how being seen strictly as a dwarf a little person or other derogatory names has impacted their entire lives hello sarah good to see you and this episode is sponsored by better help online therapy visit betterhelp.com padilla because sometimes existing is exhausting now there are many different words and ways to describe people with dwarfism what do you prefer i use dwarf if you were to say see me in public and you were curious why i was little i would tell you i have a form of dwarfism little person is fine i don't love it anytime you put a word little in front of anything it diminishes okay is a no-go that's the main one really yeah because that that term comes from the word midge which is a fly so you're calling us an insect as a little person you hear it all troll the most derogatory term would be but even some little people are okay with that it's more of the way that the term is used i'm even like offended when people call me a dwarf like look there's a dwarf it's the same thing as look there's a it makes you feel not human can you explain what dwarfism is so a little person is anybody that's under the five feet that is not proportionate so for example you are proportionate when you sit down you can put your hands on your barrier which i do frequently trust me i can't reach if i'm sitting straight my torso is the same as yours where eye to eye my arms and my legs are shorter dwarfism is um skeletal dysplasia which means that our cartilage doesn't turn into bone as fast average height children grow two to two and a half inches a year we grow between one and one and a half when you hit like 13 for girls and 15 or 16 for boys your growth plates close and that's the end my kind of dwarfism achondroplasia which is the most common form our arms and legs do not grow as fast our bodies are usually average height how does your day-to-day life differ from someone who doesn't have dwarfism the majority of our day-to-day life looks just like yours except maybe with a couple of stools around there are things that are slightly more difficult like um you brought something for us i did so this is a pedal extension so they basically clip onto the pedals super portable it takes you about 15 minutes to put them on your car they can also get you out of some speeding tickets because cops have no idea what these are oh you're speeding because you have the extras like yeah caught underneath my brakes look at it like they haven't they're lost in translation is it strictly a height difference or is there are there any health issues or complications that come along with it with every type of little person there's different physical issues that you may incur things that are common are like teeth crowding back surgeries are very common within achondroplasia spinal diffusions are very common bowing of the legs like my legs are pretty bowed i can't really put them together but a lot of little people have way more bowed legs where they may end up having to use a walker or a cane or have them surgically fixed personally for me i had really bowed legs when i was a kid and so they had to straighten them out or else i would have been walking on my ankles and they still do that now actually it's less gruesome now they've found better ways did you go through the gruesome process through the cursor what's the gruesome process they go in and they break your bone and then they cut a chunk out and then they cut a chalk out of your hip they set the bone back and put a piece of your hip in it and then it fuses together so that your leg goes straight back then i had the option of either wearing a full body cast up to here or have pins sticking out of my legs they're outside in your legs they're in your bow and they're outside and they're outside oh my god and what is the are you having a titan or adjusted they get an allen key i do not even like your leg is a piece of ikea furniture yeah they get an allen key and like turn it oh was there a moment when you first realized that you were different i was about three and we were at a fair and somebody said something probably involved the word and my uncle's response to it was if you don't get out of our faces i'm gonna beat your ass and like so much anger and i was like oh like this is really bad in the first grade and the teacher said put all of your hands on your desk and put your feet on the ground cute little boy named clayton and clayton raised his hand like a good little boy that he is but this little girl can't put her feet on the ground and at that moment i was like oh he's pointing at me i was like everybody else can put their feet on the ground it was such a like revelation for me but i didn't really think about it because it was never a part of my upbringing being raised with another little person i felt very normal in my entire environment and it wasn't until school that i felt different there were a couple of incidents where one girl picked me up and in the bathroom and shoved me in front of a mirror and said you're a freak so that probably happened to me when i was like six or seven when i got to catholic school that's when it was just torture i felt like i was living in prison because you were forced to go somewhere where you would face this kind of bullying every single day every day every day when did you first realize that there was a stigma around dwarfism almost immediately after it was just like a catapult into discovering that people were staring at me more and that was the moment where i actually like then all of a sudden i started hearing it i started listening to it it's scary at times when you don't know what your future holds because you're so different you want to be like everyone else you want to be on the cheer squad and there's some things that you just can't physically do as a little person it's not like you see any little people burglars or anything like that you can't really your life of crime was was left immediately nope that's short did you grow up in a family where anyone was familiar with dwarfism no you know i came and they were just like okay we got to figure this out that's the thing anyone can have a dwarf child i believe the numbers 80 of dwarfs actually come from average height parents and that's usually the first time average-height parents or ever encounter dwarfism because there's only 90 000 of us in america my brother who was five years older than me took upon himself to be my ultimate defender i don't think i had it as bad as it could have been because he was always around and he's big and a football player and whenever he left a school he'd leave a bodyguard he would go to some old kid that was younger than him but older than me and was kind of big and he'd go look you're my sister's bodyguard while i'm gone and so every year whatever school i was in some boy would come up to me and be like i'm your bodyguard this year so let me know if something happens or someone pops off i'll take care of it your brother sent me so then i had sort of this layer of protection how did you deal with that as a child feeling dehumanized i ended up having a lot of emotional issues i had an eating disorder i was depressed a lot i think most dwarfs have ptsd by the time you're three you realize that people don't like you not just don't like you they think your body is gross they think your body is a sideshow like that's a mess this is why like my work right now is trying to change the narrative around disability in general all of my anger is really directed towards changing the misinformation and changing the way people think about it were you ever angry or resentful about being different i was raging angry for just being it we're just being born yeah like i chose it which i knew intellectually i knew i didn't but it still like you blame yourself for being different kara eight years ago is a very very angry person kara now is not so angry i can be angered and i can i can use that anger but it's not just this ball of anger for something you actually had no and it's okay to be a dwarf when did you have that realization that being a dwarf is okay fully realize that i would say not until like maybe eight years ago so you sat most of your life feeling like it was not okay like i don't feel like i came to terms with it coming to terms with that like it's okay to be a dwarf is it like revolutionary because the world tells you you're not okay what about dating was that ever an issue oh like still an issue okay because there's so much betterness that is fetishization fetishization it's very hard to figure out who wants to date you for you and who wants to date you because you seem like it'll be an adventure i hit rock bottom dating this dumb boy who looks just like you ironically and i don't have any pictures of him very high possibility being very dumb if you look like me just gonna say it he was my best friend for two years we started dating he couldn't handle becoming from my best friend to dating and it was an emotional rollercoaster that i went on a psychological roller coaster that i went on because i felt inadequate for the first time the moment that i knew that that this was going to be an issue was uh he wanted to go to a movie he wanted to sit in the very back we went into the theater after it already started and all i'm not like registering like these are red flag red flag red flag he wanted to sit in the far back like like the very last seat and then he wanted to leave before the movie was over he's like we should get out of here before the movie's over he didn't want to be seen with you he did not want to be seen with me he was so scared to be seen with me and that was like that pivotal moment where i was like oh you're doing this because i'm little this has nothing to do with you like not liking me this has everything to do with you caring what other people think so after we said like okay we can't do this that was when i was like okay mom let's get lumbering thing that was when i wanted to change for him instead of making him change for me blend lengthening is this crazy process where they break your bones and then they um every day they turn the screw it it basically opens up your cartilage and your muscles and stretches them all and you do this for one year of your life that was the point where i was like i want to look like everybody else and i remember begging my mom she said absolutely not i hit rock bottom i was in a total depression and that was my what my mom was saying you are not wanting limb lengthening for you you are wanting limb lengthening for somebody else and when you come to me and say you want limb lengthening for you then we can have a real conversation and she was right i wasn't wanting one lengthening for me i was wanting it for a dumb boy so i changed everything in my life i went to college started reading books i decided i wanted to get in like full time in the entertainment industry and uh two years later i moved out to california bye many people might think that once you become an adult you've moved on past the bullying you know leave that with the children are the ones that bully do you deal with any discrimination in your adulthood i think every little person does my husband we were at this hardware store a woman kept taking pictures of us he was like if she takes one more picture of us i'm gonna go off on her and i was just mortified and just totally embarrassed and the manager got involved because it was that kind of situation and it turns out she was like i love little people they turn me on i get off to them and these are the photos that i took like who what i'm much more vocal about and i will i'll address it head on and tell you to off and what i like about new york is that when someone is acting inappropriately if you stay off other people will be like why did she say oh you're being an and then it turns the crowd against them so if someone's commenting something right now you would say there we go there we go why do you think that prejudice still exists as strongly as it does about people with dwarfism when you see a little person it is rare one in 30 000 is not something that you encounter on a regular basis and i feel like it's a fascination it's it's human nature but there is a a way to handle human nature my husband was performing last week and somebody was like i have never come up to someone that is as short as you and he's like if you were to ever go up to a redhead and be like i've never met a redhead is that redhead gonna look at you like you're crazy abso freaking lutely at the end of the day it's we are very unintimidating because we're so little you don't feel like i'm gonna kick your tushy or anything like that you just feel like no matter what happens it'll be okay so it's kind of like a power dynamic in a sense where people feel like they can say or do anything because they're not intimidated by you sadly yes do you ever deal with having an association of being cute or childlike just because of simply you're right when i was growing up i remember thinking like the three words that i hated the most were cute adorable and precious because you immediately feel my newt and i felt like those words like almost were just as bad as calling me a you were telling me that you know a lot about the history of dwarfism and that it's like no one talks about the history of dwarfism [Music] it starts in egypt where we were demigods so we were high status we um a lot of us were in we're midwives because of our small hands and so that was seen as god like to be able to deliver and then as time went on it got worse and so like once you hit like renaissance time the italian courts were building weird little rooms and they would dress dwarfs and dress them up in tiny court clothes and put them in these tiny rooms that people could come and like view them in entertainment like look at them dance whatever and then you know you flash to pt barnum and the circuses and the sideshows there was a selling of bodies for dwarfs and so they would sell them into these side shows where they were treated horribly and put on for show how do you feel about the way dwarfism is portrayed in media look at snow white and the seven dwarfs okay i'm guessing very beloved within the dwarf community not being labeled as as grumpy the emotions attached to each of you that's it that's it and you're waiting for some white savior lady to show up and clean your house meanwhile like these are grown men who've been working in the mine like i think they got it from the time you're like two three years old that's what you see and guess what they're making it again do you think people don't know how much stigma is going is they surround you because they love it because that's what they grew up with that's my favorite i love that we have that taika waititi's making willy wonka and the chocolate factory again willy wonka save the oompa loompas and look at them what would they be without willy wonka saving them willy wonka can't um have the factory without the oompa loompa so how is he saving it not they're saving him he wouldn't be rich with a a chocolate factory without the oompa loompas running his factory because he's not running it what i needed as a kid i needed someone that looked like me who was fighting for me so i feel like um i wasn't given any opportunities in media and i wanted to be in this entertainment world i wanted to be a singer is how i first envisioned my life i created many impersonations i did mini britney mini gaga i would impersonate some of their dance moves you know hey brittany moving forward when i said you know what i don't want to impersonate anymore i want to do something different little women was really that outlet i wanted to show the world who we were and how we lived life and how we made things possible in our own daily lives how successful is it can you name how successful it's become we are one of the first reality shows from the united states to be streamed across the world we were number one in mexico for three years and that's like there were six seasons that went on three years we were number one on the mexico network and i think that this success really has a lot to do with our real life situations is what made it so relatable and why it became so popular around the world why do you think little women has caught on around the world they gave me a good voiceover no oh cause it's dubs yeah it's totally dumped oh i have like a really like smoker voice she's like just like here it's it's a it's such a rare thing because they don't have that kind of community there they don't have a little person community that performs there and so i feel like it's you know it's the same thing as the side eye you're curious even to this day we have all of these reality shows that are based on our bodies little women of la there was this one time in particular they went to a restaurant set the shot at the high tops or dwarfs why so that tells me you don't really care about us you are fetishizing our bodies under the guise of a story but it's not really about the story but the story is is that our bodies are weird the show itself definitely any time there was a challenge they wanted to do it anytime that there was something awkward they wanted to do it if you look at almost every single one of our scenes we're like at high bar stools yeah like why would you do that and it's the producers that were smart and they're really showing like how different it is for us how different it is for us to climb into a bar stool how different it is for us to do things that advertise people wouldn't like blink twice at but a little person has a struggle with at the end of the day like i'm grateful for everything that that show did because it really taught a lot of the world that different is just as cool as average some people might think that making something all about the fact that this person is different is exploitative it's highlighting the way that they're different and making the conversation about that and you know i can't go without thinking better help for sponsoring this episode therapy has helped reframe my view of the world and of myself by allowing me to feel empathy for my younger self and therefore understand who i am today better but therapy can be customized to whatever's right for you and can be useful in helping with motivation or feelings of depression anxiety stress insecurity or whatever else you might need butter help screens all their therapists to ensure that they have experience and that they're certified and licensed and provides customized therapy that offers video phone and even live chat sessions with your therapist so you don't have to see anyone or speak over the phone if that's not something that you're comfortable with as you may have found out by now therapy can be expensive and the price of finding a therapist that you like and that you connect with can be overwhelming which is why better help offers a more affordable alternative to in-person therapy where you can start communicating with your therapist in less than 48 hours so thank you to better help who are giving i spent today with viewers and listeners of the podcast 10 off their first month at betterhelp.com padilla that's better h-e-l-p-com padilla now back to the world of people with dwarfism some people might think that making something all about the fact that this person is different is exploitative in the entertainment industry this is such a 50 50 conversation why is there little people doing elf jobs why is there little people doing these other derogatory jobs now those jobs don't exist those jobs are cgi'd those jobs are just short people a lot of people are scared to offer those jobs to little people because they're scared that they're going to be offending us at the end of the day this was how i was making my livelihood and those kinds of jobs have completely gone away now while that is great in the little person community for the entertainment world that is in the little person community it becomes a lot harder then you're trying out for the jobs that the directors already have a vision of an advertised person why take that away when it's technically at the end of the day you're acting [Music] if there's anyone watching who has dwarfism and maybe feels insecure because of the stigma surrounding dwarfism and dealt with similar struggles that you dealt with growing up is there anything you want to say to them all the information that's coming at you that you're less than it's not you it's the way society has been set up and you are experiencing the inequality and the violence because of the way society is set up but it's not your fault and so don't punish yourself for any of it understand that it's and it's an external source it's not you that's like this giving yourself daily affirmations even if it just means one like pick one tiny little thing that you like about yourself and you really try and feel energy towards things that you're happy about whether it be physical or internal and you have to instill that in yourself and really affirmations meditation that's truly how i created a different mindset to where i was able to create the life of my dreams it's okay to be different and it's okay to succeed as someone that is different and you can you have the ability to succeed even though you're different i spent the day with people with dwarfism and one thing that really sits with me is how the feelings of being celebrated versus being exploited can be entirely different from one person to another even within the same community everyone is an individual and like tara said we look different but so does everybody else [Music] and i want to learn how to drive stick you should oh my gosh we should try you should do you know how to drive stick no every time i tell them i want to drive stick and then i show them my pedal extensions everybody has a quick um and maybe maybe um tomorrow maybe tomorrow yeah i i have to i have i have plans that day i bought an extra pedal just so i could learn how to drive stick and uh nobody has been willing to teach me how you just you just hop in my car and give it a whirl we'll see what happens i'm totally fine with that no i tried i tried to drive stick one time and almost destroyed my friend's car so uh we would be in the same boat i think we both need to go learn how to drive

Channel: AnthonyPadilla

Views: 828,785

Keywords: anthony padilla, padilla, anthony, i spent a day with, interview

Id: 2QLCrjG_ISo

Length: 24min 45sec (1485 seconds)

Published: Thu Sep 01 2022