I Only Want an Authentic White Woman - Lance Woods

i'm all for interracial day and i encourage it black dude white girl whatever i'm do what you do love who you love it's 2019 racism is ridiculous but i do feel like when i see black dudes date white girls i just be wanting to make sure she's a authentic white like a real white woman like i don't like when i see black dudes date white girls that act black i'd be like [ __ ] just get a black girl why are you [ __ ] with this generic off-brand white woman if you're gonna go while you got this great value white woman if you're gonna go go get the real deal family if you see me with a white girl i'm going all the way to mayberry i'm not [ __ ] around i'm not i want a black white girl from a black neighborhood she got the same problems i got she don't really know her dad either do you understand what i'm saying i want all the white stuff i seen on t i want me a gluten free flip flops in the rain uh pumpkin spice latte make her own trail mix i want feet on the dashboard on car rides i want her facebook profile picture to be a puppy i wanted to [Music] let the cat sleep in the bed with her all the white [ __ ] [Applause] [Music] that he do that's what i want i want i want the real diff i'ma go fam i don't want a white girl talking all black to me uh i'm babe on my mama yo mama no [ __ ] you have a mother i don't you use your words around me that's what you're here for you don't you don't have a mama that's not no i don't want to know nothing about hip-hop basic questions she failed a test hey babe you like two chains yeah i love jewelry that type of [ __ ] [ __ ] because if you have two chains and lose one you still have a whole another chain so who [Applause] [Music] it's two chains and two packs that's what i like the confusion on your face is what i want for my white woman she's sitting there like yeah that makes perfect sense [Applause] sky's brilliant give me two chains our anniversary is coming up i want to be the first black dude she ever seen in person like she's only heard myths and tall tales about us i wanted to touch me like an african touching snow for the first time [Applause] i'm talking so white when she start talking to me her family stopped talking to her do you understand just look disappointed we did not raise her like this i did i i like i didn't say i dated or what we hung out for a few weeks i had to i had to split i don't like white woman hair it's just that's not my [ __ ] i don't like it you that's what he said that's why i'm here look at me said me neither dog that's why i got kaisha [Music] that's a church clap amen [Applause] you better preach young man i don't like the white girl you know what i'm talking about it's sheds for no reason white woman hair shed for them gotta be wet they don't gotta comb it you know when you just leave a hug with a white girl you said the [ __ ] you feel like you walked through a spider with it you can hear from a white girl you want to shower you clean the midsection off and then you keep finding strands it'd be all up and down you saw the [ __ ] this [ __ ] literally gave me her hand it's steel it won't stop famous like easter basket grass all over the pit it won't stop sirs you laying the bed where to get out the bed look at your pillow all of this hair left on your pillow all of this csi evidence left all on your pillow fam that's why i love my sisters my beautiful black african queens that's right yes black women got the common courtesy and decency to take their hair off [Applause] were you scared the first time did it startle you [Applause] [Music] no ron he was concerned [Music] that the first time it was messed you up fam when you don't know she had it on tell somebody we don't know either we just see this and we don't know what the [ __ ] is under there either until she take it off and you see that she got them 1996 allen alex and carl rosa she got these [ __ ] the queen latifah said it all friends [Applause] the og bobby johnson thanks ray ray she got them braids or she got one braid that wrapped all the way around and stick up at the top [Applause] she got the little candle wick at the top of the [Applause] when you don't know she had it on that's the scariest part i brought this girl home from the club i go in the bathroom i'll come out the bathroom i see this my same haircut sitting on my bed i went back in the bathroom i called the police i said excuse so me hear my girl clothes on officer i don't i don't know what happened to my bad [ __ ] from the club but he is here now i heard this from the room is everything okay and he got a voice down this dude is a professional hey what's up party people if you enjoy our youtube videos you definitely don't want to miss out on our virtual chocolate sundaes comedy show we do it every sunday at 7 p.m pacific standard time now i'm your host comedian ron g and we also got my man dj sidekick on the ones and twos it's amazing and you don't want to miss out for more details go to the description box and get all the information till then don't block your blessing we'll see you sunday

Channel: Chocolate Sundaes Comedy

Views: 918,759

Keywords: authentic, chocolate sundaes comedy show, comedy show, comedy, laughs, hollywood, lance woods, lance woods stand up, stand, stand up comedy, interracial dating, karen, comedy club, comedy stand up, laughs for gags, sir lance woods, stand up, karen story, laugh factory, hilarious videos, wigs, Authentic lifestyle

Id: aIZIEEvkW9w

Length: 7min 39sec (459 seconds)

Published: Fri Feb 19 2021