I Have A Perfect Memory, I Can Even Remember

i've been listening to my parents fight since before i was born and i mean that literally see it didn't take them long to realize there was something strange about their daughter as soon as i learned to talk which happened really fast by the way i would describe things we had done yesterday or last week my parents said i remember things in amazing detail like crazy detail they thought i was a genius and it even got them to stop fighting for a while see i didn't even know my parents constant fighting was weird it was all i had ever known when i started going over to my friends houses to play i saw how their parents smiled at each other how they seemed happy and their homes were cozy and warm where mine fell cold and dark i decided the best way to make my parents act normal was to keep impressing them with my memory the problem was my amazing memory started getting in my way at school sometimes i couldn't concentrate on the lessons because my brain was so full of memories i could remember everything that happened the day before the week before the month before even years before i was pretty sure i could remember every single day of my life oh and real quick if you hit like and subscribe it'll make you feel all warm and fuzzy inside just like your favorite childhood memory one day we took a trip to see my aunt my parents said it was time to finally meet her and my cousin they only live like an hour away but for most of my childhood my parents had acted like that was just too far to visit really i think it was because my mom didn't like her sister much this is the way we went when i was a baby i told them as we drove my dad turned around and stared at me my mom yelled at him to wash the road what do you mean he asked we went down these roads and we went to a lady's house it had cats everywhere my parents were silent for a long time you can't remember that far back my mom said it's impossible how else would she know those details my dad asked my mom we must have shown her a picture of aunt judy's house but they hadn't i just remembered it i got distracted then remembering other things from that day the memories were a little fuzzy i guess since i didn't have the words at the time to identify what was going on but i remembered my mom crying on the way there and back so loud the sound of it had made me cry too the memory of our crying got stuck in my head and i almost didn't notice we had reached aunt judy's my mom looked upset as we walked the door what's wrong i asked her she smiled but it wasn't a real smile nothing she said let's go see euron on judy was nice my cousin phillip was okay i guess i mean i was at an age where boys were icky but my parents kept staring at him and saying how beautiful he was and how he was growing up so fast beautiful barf i got bored fast the whole house smelled like a cat litter box my mind drifted back to the memories and i could hear my mom's crying again mixing with my tiny baby cries what's wrong with you philip asked you just totally spaced out there whatever i said i'm bored let's go see the attic he said finally something exciting he said we had to be really quiet because he wasn't allowed to go up there the steps were very narrow and slippery we snuck away from our parents and i followed him to the long dark staircase we started going up but i hesitated feeling like i was in a horror movie like the darkness would swallow me whole i started crawling but i couldn't see where i i slipped and fell back down the stairs there was a horrible pain in my leg and i started to cry my parents drove me to the hospital i don't want to go to the hospital i said through my tears it's too bright there you've never been to the hospital my dad said no when we were there before it was too bright and everything was cold my dad looked very confused i wasn't quite sure how to explain it it was dark and warm and then it was like opening a window during a snowstorm suddenly it was so white and i was cold but then mom was holding me my mom turned to stare at me are you talking about when you were born that must be it i could remember that moment perfectly when i'd moved from the warmth of my mom's belly out into the world yes my mom turned white like a ghost don't you ever say that again she said nobody remembers when they are born lying is wrong i remember it i insisted stop it right now my mother shouted it was hurt and scared so i stopped talking the hospital was bright just like i remembered but it wasn't that cold getting my broken leg put in a cast hurt i wanted my mom to hold my hand but i was afraid she was still angry with me i mostly forgot about the incident for the next few weeks as i struggled to adjust to life with a broken leg but something had changed whenever i told my parents stuff i remembered they told me i was wrong no my mom would say you weren't wearing the pink dress you were wearing a green dress that day it was like they needed to prove to me my memory wasn't perfect stop lying my mom started telling me you have a serious problem my dad seemed less angry about it but he still took my mom's side this went on for so long that i started questioning my own sanity what if all my memories were really just stuff i'd made up one day my worst fears became reality my parents said they were taking me to see a psychiatrist they said i was a pathological liar and needed help my parents had gone from thinking i was a genius to thinking i was crazy i wanted to run away but where would i go so i went with them to the psychiatrist he listened as my parents described how out of control my lying had gotten i wanted to scream to say none of this was true when he asked for my side of the story i was afraid to go against my parents so i just stayed silent i had to keep seeing the psychiatrist he put me on a medication that made me feel drowsy it also messed with my perfect memory i started doing badly in school and worse i started believing my parents i was crazy my memories were lies what if i didn't get better and i had to go to a mental institution i didn't have any siblings to tell whether my childhood memories were real my mom had always hated having a sister and she had wanted an only child so i was on my own i became lonely and depressed by the time i got into high school i felt like a ghost i was still on my medication i was a bad student and i didn't have any friends but one morning i forgot to take my pill i had an amazing day at school i could actually focus for once and i impressed my teachers with all the stuff i memorized my speech class which i had been dreading went so well i felt like a new person up in front of the class giving my speech i didn't need to use my note cards at all afterward the teacher kept me after class she said i should join the debate team which traveled around competing with other schools in the state she thought it would be good for me um i said thinking about all the days my pills made me too tired to think and about the lies my brain kept making up what if i got up to debate at a competition and everything out of my mouth was pure bs i couldn't risk that i have to go i said then i ran home but the teacher kept asking me every day until finally i agreed to come to a debate club meeting before i went i skipped my pills again maybe if i could just think clearly i would be able to stop myself before i told a lie i expected all the kids to think i was a weirdo loser like everyone else in school did but they actually seemed to like me i did really well as part of the club and i stopped taking my pills all together i couldn't tell my parents about my new hobby so i said i was staying after school for tutoring at my first match against another school i felt ready to go out there and win until i saw my opponent it was my cousin phillip i barely recognized him i hadn't seen him since that night i broke my leg we caught up before the match and he was nice and fun to talk to we even watched my story animated together on my phone but when it was time to go on stage we were all business it was a tight match and i could feel the adrenaline rush through me i did well at first but then my overactive memory started getting in the way i would remember things philip had said to me before the match a certain way he smiled and then suddenly i was remembering things from when we were kids focus i told myself you can't lose this at the end the judge declared me the winner i was so excited where you gonna put your ribbon phil asked me afterward my good mood vanished i wasn't going to be able to put my ribbon anywhere because if my parents saw i would be in huge trouble i don't know i said he noticed i was sad and said it was a good match do you feel like going out for ice cream we did and we had such a fun evening together he told me about his plans to study political science in college i hadn't even thought about what i would do in college what was a crazy lying freak like me going to do for a living i can't believe how well you had your talking points memorized he told me that was really incredible it had been so long since someone thought my memory was awesome rather than a sign of mental illness i realized i felt a strong connection with philip and i didn't want to go home we agreed we would video chat online and help each other with our debate skills even though you're my rival he said with a grin we stayed in touch and when we saw each other at another match we spent the evening together again we ended up talking about our crushes he had a crush on the president of his school's spanish club and i had a crush on one of the baseball players at my school i don't even know how to kiss i said i had like zero social life until now he laughed that's sad if your cousin is your social life and even sadder that you don't know how to kiss you can practice on me if you want gross i said even though i knew he was teasing we're cousins you should see your face he was cracking up you thought i was serious no i didn't would you do it if i dared you he asked we were just kidding around but i actually was desperate to know how it felt like to kiss somebody he stuck his lips out joking like he was waiting for me to try it i decided to scare him i leaned in until my lips were almost against his suddenly we both pulled away and fell backwards laughing like hyenas i said spitting and rubbing my mouth he did the same it was weird though i felt such a strange connection to him not like a crush exactly just like we were meant to become friends even though it was pathetic that my cousin was my best friend when i got home that night i was walking on air until i saw my mom waiting for me she held up my medication bottle and rattled the pills explain this she sounded furious you should be almost done with this bottle by now we should be calling in for a refill why is the bottle full i thought about making up an excuse but she already thought i was a liar so i just told the truth i thought you were getting better she shouted but now your lies have reached a whole new level we'll have to go back to the psychiatrist no i begged i'm finally happy i'm so much better when i'm not on the pills i can think more clearly the pills help you she interrupted they keep your condition under control i can't believe you do this lying about your medication about where you've been you're not going back to that club and you're not going to see philip ever again i started crying mom please you can't take him away from me i cried so hard i thought i was going to throw up all the good things in my life were disappearing but my sobs brought back a memory from a long long time ago i was just a baby in my mother's arms and i was crying as she took me away from aunt judy's house crying because i felt like my heart was breaking my mom grabbed my arm but then she looked at me and started crying too she let me go the sound of us both crying brought the memory back clearer than ever we were in the car driving away from on duties but this time i could see not just her and dad in the front seats but the empty seat beside me where a second baby carrier had been just moments before i gasped and stared at my mom philip was my brother she was crying too hard to reply i remember we were born together we were born in your arms and then stop my mother screamed you don't remember that you can't but i didn't stop you drove us both to aunt judy's but you only brought me home you're a liar no i shouted back i'm not suddenly i heard my dad's voice it's time to tell her i looked at him and asked tell me what they told me how my mom had wanted an only child so badly when they'd found out they were pregnant with twins they made secret arrangements to give one of the babies to aunt judy who couldn't have kids the painful choice made my mom so depressed she hadn't wanted to see aunt judy or philip ever again but finally she couldn't resist she had to see her other child so we visited on judy but after that night her guilt got worse she knew she had to do something to keep me from remembering the truth i couldn't believe it my mom's lies had ruined most of my life but the way she looked at me after she told her story i knew she'd been hurt too we both had i wasn't ready to forgive her yet but she promised we'd have a meeting with aunt judy and phillip and figure out a way to repair our broken family i realized then that she truly did love me even if the weight of her terrible secret had kept her from showing it until now you

Channel: My Story Animated

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Id: _GR1WjShK6w

Length: 13min 8sec (788 seconds)

Published: Wed Aug 05 2020